I was introduced to you

By a friend of a friend

They thought we'd get on

Well that, depends

You see although you are nice

A great bit of trouser leg

When you start talking

For silence I do beg

I want to nod off

But don't want to appear rude

So I start being silly

Cracking jokes so crude

I'm trying to put you off

So you'll think I'm too crass

But apparently you now think

I'm one hell of a lass

On paper you are perfect

Tall, dark with brown eyes

But I'm just not feeling it

I want to feel butterflies

I'm not that shallow

To be with you for the hell of it

Yeah you might look great

But your conversation is so shit

I'm sure you'll find a girl

Who you can hang upon your arm

But I'm far too good for that

I am not some blokes lucky charm