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|The petals when felt, feelings burst through our chest, high and low jumped some fluttering insects, an instrument drumming against an involuntary mess. Oh my cupid, did you want me in hell with such a mischievous attempt!|

by medicallymessedup

•present•

She loved Aryan Mallik.

The stranger who she wasn't meant to be with. The preparator who caught her sight when nobody else did. The man of her dreams and the tranquilizer to her nightmares. The vision of her future yet the irony of her present.

The regretting pang in her heart offensively knocked down her feelings because nothing could possibly happen.

Aryan Mallik and Ruchi Batra's world ran in the parallel universe. They were destined to never meet or she thought.

They were two different rivers that flowed in the opposite directions which are never meant to mingle.

And wasn't it just about her one-sided feelings. What about Aryan? She wasn't a fascinating object in his life if not for this abrupt halt in their vacation. He can never reciprocate the same feelings for her.

While Ruchi was promised to a man whom she wasn't even close to. She is supposed to get engaged to him in a matter of a few days.

Why was she muddled up in the shades of love when her life was already decided? She wondered.

It was quite late at night when they arrived in Delhi and subsequently hailed a cab till her residence. What surprised Ruchi was Aryan's disturbing silence. They didn't even strike a conversation since they touched the ground of their hometown. She at least had a reason to be guilty and confused but he didn't.

"Sir, the cab's ignition isn't starting and it might need repairing. You would've to take some other cab." The cab driver said.

Ruchi shared a look with Aryan who stared at her wordlessly. He paid the driver while she got out and waited for him. She made him know that her house wasn't far away and they could reach there in about a fifteen minutes walk and he abided.

Aryan's rampaging taciturnity had been substituting as the soft pattering of rain in the dark canopy of a rainforest. The chilly winds did their work best after the little drizzle sending a strange rawness down her woolen sleeves. The red clouds signaled that it would be raining again anytime soon. Ruchi seemed to send a short prayer to the almighty that it should be once they reach home as they paraded on foot towards her residence.

"You don't need to worry, Aryan." Ruchi tried to break up the thickness surrounding them, "I'll walk back home as it's just two streets away. You can go." She tried to avoid the fact her head had been lately wrapped around.

Aryan was a celebrated dysaudicant and true to the possibility of her mind when he straightaway annulled the fruitless trials to make him leave. "I will accompany you till those two streets then and don't be guilty because I had promised to never leave your side."

He went ahead kicking on the pebbles on his way while she slung the bag over her shoulders eyeing the fading form of the cab condemning the alignment of her stars for the day that was soon going to get changed at the exact start of the new day. But, her situation was more unpredictable than it seemed.

After running the horses of her brain back and forth she concluded on the idea which would distract them or mostly her from the ongoing situation creeping her inside out. They would talk to decrease the awkwardness and she would have to initiate it.

"If these three days wouldn't have been with you then it might have turned into an insufferable trial for me." Ruchi verbalized her thoughts out for him to hear, "But, thanks to your likable company I have not gone crazy out there. It was a nice time even though we were lost."

Her words couldn't dissolve the cramped smog around them.

The gust of winds made her shiver, resulting in wrapping her arms around herself as she felt light-headed looking at the vast sky above and she continued her stride without a care.

"Kind of the infamous crybaby and introvert personality that I'm known for among the peers. This was one of the most incredible adventures in my life."

Aryan looked back at her halting in his steps, "Trust me no one else can tell that you're not any of those two. I had known you enough until now."

"Who would really believe you even if you claim that?" Ruchi asked, catching his attention with an arresting simper.

"Putting you into simple words is, 'My Unraveled Mystery Girl'." Ruchi's eyes narrowed, expressing her qualms to the meaning of his words as he volunteered to explain her thoroughly, "It's like you pick up the same tanning book, like fine bed linen sized with starch, you pick every month from the old wood room."

Her curiosity dulled into the frail suspicion threatening to wound her thoughts which didn't help her mouth, "Same book?"

"That same one you borrow to read quite often, the age-old story of affection between a longing father and his daughter due to the timeless adversities." He told, "The classic fabrication by its author but who the hell idolizes it nowadays. It's outdated!"

"How come you know about my interest in the library, particularly the unknown center of attraction at the last corner?" The question came out before she could comprehend.

"There aren't many people who are always busy in the library and you're an exception for me to not notice."

"How did you pick up my interest?"

"I have my ways."

Ruchi tried hard to not react but did anyway, "How can I forget about it? The old room is your secret place of meaningful adventures, you can spot anyone from there."

A thunderous wave of realization dawned upon both of them discerning whatever they had talked about and it wasn't at all funny. Ruchi overall felt like an idiot for showcasing her irrationality in front of him while Aryan was astonished. He had finally got the chance to ask her for what he had been waiting for so long.

"I should get going. Goodnight and thanks once again." She got on her heels to walk away but the tug on her wrist impeded her further movement.

"Why are you marrying him?" Aryan caught her with a twist of tongue. This was exactly what she had been dreading about, a confrontation. But the thought of it even sounded like a long lived nightmare.

"Wh-What are you talking about Aryan?" She was baffled, not willing enough to put two and two together.

"You and I, both of us know what I am asking you about, Baby." He coached further as Ruchi stood clueless, "You don't love that guy then why are you getting engaged to him?"

Ruchi knew she was almost trapped and if Aryan pursued it anymore she would end up telling the unfathomable truth and she did not want it. It was just going to hurt so escaping from it seemed the final remedy to her quandary.

"You don't need to worry about me." She tried to smile but ended up taking a shallow breath, "I like Aakash." Aryan's eyes weren't even slightly convinced of the relayed pretense and she wanted to actually run away from him, "Aryan, it's quite late you should get going from here."

'Leave from here, before I do something I would regret later. I don't want to end up hurting myself or you either.' She thought.

"You need to stop snubbing over the truth. Running away isn't going to do any of us good." He bursted, "You fucking like me then why can't you accept that? In Fact the truth to be told." Her eyes went saucers as his words awfully churned up her stomach. "You love me." He avowed making the air hitch in her throat.

"I can't.. I don't love you, Aryan. You're...you're mistaken. I like Aakash." Ruchi stammered, unable to meet up his eyes. "I don't... I don't love..you." Her mouth went dry and her heart shrunk at the end of her statement but Aryan wasn't going to take her excuses for this time.

"Stop it, just fuckin' stop it dammit!" His voice grew up a few octaves higher increasing the breathing tension in the air, "Have you for once seen yourself when I wasn't on the train in time? Every time and everywhere I catch you stealing glances at me, your frown changes into a beautiful smile within minutes and you're happiest when you see me. When you see me with someone else have you noticed yourself? You go ten times paler than a dead leaf."

'I never knew he had noticed me all this while but now it wasn't worth telling him. Nothing makes sense to me when it's you, Aryan. My say won't matter knowing you would never love me, my family is involved too and I can't betray them especially Papa who has trusted me after so long.' Her conscious mind grimaced.

"I don't love you, Mr. Mallik." The reverse psychology deterred a little hope in the looming darkness, "I'm not like those other girls you go about roaming and get started sooner than you know with. I am not one of them and moreover I have Aakash for myself who loves me. You're miles away from experiencing an emotion called love. Can you ever know what love means?" She asked, trying to get herself away but she couldn't gather why he wasn't ready to leave and so bothered about her state. "So, please just go. Leave me!!"

"It's up to me to acknowledge what I feel or not but you have to confess yourself. What will you get by hiding it and marrying someone whom your heart does not consent to? You're just leading upon a path which will take neither of you anywhere. It's pure destruction."

"I don't... I don't know what you're talking about, Aryan. I beg you please leave from here else it would be a big problem for us." Ruchi fumbled with her words, refusing to meet his penetrating gaze as he took no notice of her pleas but his instinct grew stronger by her actions. She was constantly lying to both of them.

"Since you don't know what I'm talking about, why don't I show you?" Aryan arched an eyebrow at her questioningly, making her look up at him in confusion. "Aryan...What are you.." His hold on her wrist tightened and in a blink he yanked her towards him harshly. She tried hard to fight the surging storm of her own feelings with the proximity as the righteousness seemed to annex the wrong.

"Say it! C'mon say it! Say that you don't know the real me. You don't know your Aloo who you pushed away years ago. You don't the boy whose life you entered without his permission. Don't you know the boy who you befriended and promised a life? Don't you-?" He demanded, his eyes glowing with a feral need to hear it from her. He had counted on her acceptance for years and nothing but her could keep him sane.

"No..No!!" She breathed.

Aryan gently kept her close to himself by securing one of his arms over her waist as the other cupped her face in his palm ever so softly caressing her burning skin. Ruchi seemed to calm down instantly and even before she knew she had leaned in just like himself. The magical spell swirled over their head. Aryan diligently took over, closing the gap between their lips and covering her mouth with his own. He swallowed her immediate gasp of shock and kissed her, pouring out every emotion which otherwise his words failed to convey.

Her hands went to his chest, with the thought to push him away but her body had a mind of its own and she stilled. Her unschooled touch drove him crazy, though she hadn't done anything but touch him. But a simple touch, and he was gone with the rousing emotions overpowering his senses. He pushed her against the street wall behind her, crushing her soft body within his muscular arms careful enough to not hurt her as he deepened the kiss.

The fire burning inside Aryan intensified when she moaned his name in protest when he pulled her closer instead to escalate their kiss. He didn't pull away from her and had no intention of doing that else he would go crazy. Ruchi loved him, the idea itself was crazy enough. He bent his head and nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck, the floral fragrance surrounding her holding him captive like her royal prisoner. She was captivated by her exclusive feelings nurturing just for him.

Tears began rolling down her face discreetly as she stood weak in between this moment of helplessness and pleasure. She too liked the way her senses reacted to his touch but her duty forced her to not feel the happiness from their intense act or him. Their actions were so wrong in this world of moral and ethics that it seemed to be throwing daggers at her character.

For her feelings Ruchi knew it would never mean anything to Aryan. She wasn't even near to his preferences, he would discard her like old torn clothes leaving her heartbroken and tormented. She was a no one in his enormous glittering world.

The realization was like a flicker button to the laced up exorcism on her and she acted on an urgent impulse. She pushed him with all her trembling might and began panting for air following the aftermath from their earth shattering kiss which robbed off her sanity.

She slapped him hard across his face, shocking both herself and him. She was never a person to get violent and this was beyond her own existence. Her hand pained with the force she met his skin as the sound resonated in the awful-turning cold night.

"You're a terrible person, Aryan." Ruchi screamed with her heart coiled and eyes moistened, "I don't even know you as a person properly then how do you think I am capable of feeling something for you? Why don't you understand that?" Her agonizing feelings wept which she cautiously ignored, "I told you to not come near me but you did. Till this moment I was thankful to God that I wasn't alone in Manali and I had someone who knew me. You proved all of me wrong at the very moment. I was wrong about you, my assumptions.. all of it was delusional."

"Just.. Just leave from here." She whisper-yelled ready to walk away from him but Aryan was fast enough to act. He shoved her against the wall pinning between himself and the freezing wall like before. She was even scared to shout because it won't be good if anyone saw them together, the trouble would then be unavoidable.

"You can't deny the facts, Baby." And again he called that, "Trust me I'll prove it to you very soon. The guy you claim who loves you won't even be near you once I tell him you were with me all along." He said in a calm yet treacherous tone.

"Shut up! Just shut up, okay!" Her lips wobbled, "I can imagine you can't help anyone so you decide why not create problems in other's life. This time the fun object is my life for you, isn't it? Aakash isn't the one who won't trust me. I will tell him about it and he will support me too. The circumstances of our togetherness were predestined but it doesn't change anything. Ruchi and Aryan do not exist together."

"Challenge then?"

'We are back to the question of where you'll do anything to satisfy your ego while it's only me who will have to bear the consequences.' Her conscious mind warned.

"Leave from here Mr. Mallik!!" She asserted.

"First tell me, did you accept the challenge, Baby?"

"Leave from here." She said again but he tugged on her wrist, and kissed the corner of her mouth ever so slowly. It wasn't even close to a kiss as she thrashed against him whimpering in pain because getting out of his hold was impossible for her.

Aryan left her and moved a few steps back. His jaw tensed looking at her tears which didn't stop as she looked at him through her blurry vision.

"Then get geared up to break your engagement, Baby. I won't let that Aakash anywhere near you for sure." He trailed, "I promise and unlike you I'm hell bent on keeping up my vow."

"It won't happen. I'll get engaged to him on the same planned day, Aryan Mallik. Do whatever comes to your mind and the things you're capable of pulling off. This won't get you anywhere. I am not yours." She promised with an unrelenting stare before rushing inside her house without glancing back at him.

She was tired of fighting her feelings and Aryan's reluctance didn't do any good for her. She was worn-out being the puppet for others but the man she loved had fortuitously unchained her restraints. He had seen her naked emotions and there was no going back.

Ruchi wiped up the tear stains on her face as she did not want her family to get suspicious, neither did she wish for them to get worried for her sake nor to learn about her heartbreak. Aryan's mention can bring havoc in her family's happiness.

Finally gathering a control over her rippling emotions, she then rang the bell.

Ruchi heard the commotion from the other side and her heartbeat ballooned when Kartik answered the door, "Whose this?" It came as a shock and relief for him the moment he saw his baby sister, "Baby?" He gasped and she launched herself in his arms being haywire of all what happened moments ago.

"Bhai!!" She sobbed out in helplessness while Kartik comforted her and called out for everyone else in the house. "Hey! How are you? How did you get home? Where were you all this while, Baby!?" He began questioning but she did nothing but weep more hopelessly.

"Oh My God!"

"Are you fine, Baby?" Sujal and Mamta asked as soon as they took into her shaky sight. "Where have you been, Baby!?"

"Dear!" Sunil called out for her softly when Ruchi didn't calm down to anyone's concerned plea to confirm about her well-being. She slowly lifted her submerged lashes when her father asked her if she was alright or did she face any trouble and she pitied herself that moment.

The only man important to her was her father and he was here with her when she needed him the most.

Ruchi hugged her father, like she used to when she was once a little-girl earning for a protective embrace, which promised her of never pushing away or judging her actions. Her own doings had caused another blow from the person she loved today. Sunil reciprocated the gesture and she felt so wrong about thinking to crush his words under the turmoil of her selfishness knowing the crime she committed.

Ruchi decided that she won't let her one narcissistic mistake ruin all their happiness.

Aryan and Ruchi's unforgettable episode was bound to be closed in the memory lane of Manali diaries.

Lots of Love,

ANKITA