A/N Okay, so this is going to be proper depressing, so read at your own risk. A happy update will go up along with this though, so you can have happy stuff after sinking into depression. Magnus' phone.

MB: Hey, Alexander. I'm going to a party today. After two years.

MB: I wish I could talk to you

MB: I wish you were still here

MB: I wish I could be in your arms right now and I wish you'd complain about this party

MB: But um I need to get ready now, Alexander. I'll talk to you soon, okay?

MB: I love you, pretty boy. I just want to hear you say it back, you know? I wasn't ready to not hear your voice ever again. I'm still not used to it, angel.

~~At the party~~

MB: Alexander I can't do this. 

MB: I know you told me to move on, but I can't my sweetheart

MB: I can't enjoy this party

MB: I can't do anything

MB: Come back to me darling I miss you so much

MB: I haven't hugged anyone in two years

MB: I haven't kissed anyone in two years

MB: I haven't not cried for a single day in two years

MB: I feel it coming on now, Alexander. A breakdown. I wish you were here to tell me it's alright

MB: This party is so crap and I want to come home, but you wouldn't approve. You'd want me to have fun.

MB: I'm going to stay for you, Alexander. For you.

MB: I'd do anythig for you

MB: I hope I made your life happy, Alexander. I know I tell you this every week, but you made me the happiest person ever, my angel. 

MB: But maybe that's why it hurts so much now... I don't know.

MB: But without you here, I don't know what to do

MB: I think you literally drove me insane, my darling. Like look at me now.. I'm never going to get a reply to these texts but I can't help but keep doing this. I want you so bad, Alexander.

MB: Two years. Alexander, I - I need you

MB: No one's ever loved me so much or broken me so much

MB: Oh Alexander, a faerie wants to talk to me, I'll text you soon, my gorgeous Shadowhunter. I promise I won't flirt with the faerie either, even though you want me to don't you? 

MB: You want me to forget you, but I can't, sweetheart. Whatever happens, I'm not going to even get into close proximity with the faeries. Wait for me, Alexander. I'm going to be back.

~~At home~~

MB: I stayed until midnight, Alexander. I couldn't any longer.

MB: I promise I'll try to stay longer next time.

MB: Well, today was better than my other days...

MB: I only broke down twice and only sobbed half a dozen times. I attended a party and tried to talk to people. I still can't move on though. 

MB: It's two in the morning now, angel. 

MB: I made sure I ate something healthy like you always tell me to after a night of partying. I took my make up off and I'm wearing your sweater, Alexander. I wish it still smelled like you.

MB: I'm going to try sleep now, Alexander. It's really hard without you holding me but I'm going to try, okay?

MB: I'll probably see you in my dreams. I normally do. I hope I don't get a nightmare though, because you aren't here to tell me it's not real.

MB: But I am going to sleep so I don't ruin my health. You wouldn't want that. 

MB: I love you. I'll always love you. I love you soooooo much 

MB: Good night, Alexander.

~~

A/N WHAT DID I JUST DO? 

Well um anyway... I just cried whilst writing this and I'm just gonna request you to not kill me so I can update the fluffy stuff in a minute. Votes and comments are welcome but um yea...

I do love you; I'm not trying to push you into sadness.

-IC ♥