If you all keep up with my message board post you'll know that I asked you all for pray for my brother. Some of you asked for updates.

So I'm here to tell you.

It didn't get better.

It go worse.

The worst it could be. I know in my heart God has a plan for this all. That there is something better and new out there. That God has a plan.

But all I'm doing is crying right now.

Because of him. Because I freaking love him and I can't tell you the pain it puts me through to see him so broken. And crying... I've never seen him cry... and be in so much pain before..

I'm crying right now because I'm angry. At how he was treated. Of what happened. Because a lot people tore my brother down to dirt. Even though all he ever gave them was everything.

I don't understand how a person could be so cruel to another...

I'm crying because of my future.. because I'm scared.. I'm looking at my older siblings and seeing what they've gone through. And I'm terrified. Gosh I've already been through so much crap. At the time I thought was everything I could take... but now.. now I'm not so sure..

My family.. we all have our flaws. We all have been through our own 'Hells'-trials. And I'm sure more will come. But they take a part of us...

And you just learn from it..

I'm crying... he's crying. He's very very hurt.

He needs a lot of prayer for the next few months. I know he'll never be completely healed and he'll have scars but pray for him please...

So much is going on right now and I'm not even sure how to handle half of it.

Thank you guys❤️ a lot.

I'm going to go... I need some time. I should be sleeping. But I honestly can't right now.

-commander out