"Hey, cool rings, Sadie."

Sophia flinched imperceptibly and then forced herself to look up at Carmen, one of the younger women in their department. "Thanks, Carmen," she said.

Sophia knew that it would be rough to hear people call the silicone rings Dean had given her Sadie's. They were Sophia's, and that was a firm distinction in Sophia's mind. But, after talking with Jamie, Sophia desperately wanted to take back at least a part of her life. The rings hadn't left her hands since Dean had given them to her, and they were some of the few personal items the F.B.I. had allowed her to keep. So she had taken them out of the box they were carefully wrapped up in, looking at them for the first time in over a month, and wore them in to work.

She ran her finger across the red band on her left hand, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. Part of her had expected that wearing them would cause another slide backward and only cause her pain, but they had only served to remind her of Dean. The best of Dean. It was like keeping a part of him with her.

"He would believe in you to get through this," she whispered to herself. "So you can get through this."

The job had gotten a lot better when Sophia realized that as long as she got all of her work done, no one really cared how she managed her time. As an expert multitasker, that meant she could do her office work while watching shows on her phone, which made the time move by much faster.

She had never been one to watch much television, but now, thanks to an F.B.I.-funded Netflix account, she was making her way through all the shows she had missed over the years. Ad while Stranger Things wasn't as visually impressive on her tiny screen as it would be on an actual T.V., it was still pretty damn good.

"Anyone want anything from Dunkin?"

Sophia looked up as Ronnie made the offer, and was sorely tempted. She would never admit it out loud, but it had taken her all of one trip to become a Dunkin over Starbucks lover. It was one of the few things she would miss when this was all over.

Except for the Frappuccinos. Starbucks would always have her heart in that territory.

But Sophia shook her head. "No, I'm good, thanks." Diet was one of the few things Sophia had control over in her life, so she was trying to be healthy.

Trying.

Ronnie collected a few orders, but before she left the office, Sophia stopped her. "Hey, Ronnie, are you feeling okay?"

Their supervisor looked significantly less steady on her feet than she usually did, and when she turned around to look at Sophia, she put her hand against the wall to steady herself. But she didn't get a chance to answer.

All eyes turned to the spot where Ronnie hit the ground, and Sophia leapt out of her chair.

No pulse.

Not breathing.

Probably a cardiac event.

Not good.

"We're in a damn hospital," Sophia said as she got Ronnie on her back and placed her hands on her chest. She stared at Carmen. "Go find a doctor."

Carmen sprinted out of the room as Sophia started compressions. "Hang in there, Ronnie," Sophia muttered, not flinching when she heard ribs crack, "just hang in there."

She was vaguely aware of her coworkers panicking slightly behind her, but she paid them little attention. Right now, with no AED, this was the best any of them could do.

"Where the fuck are you, Carmen?" Sophia muttered to herself. Her arms burned, and Ronnie was running out of time.

A second later, the door burst open, and Dr. Blake Rhodes ran in followed by two nurses, one of them rolling in portable equipment.

Blake took one second to survey the scene, his eyes focusing in on Sophia and Ronnie. Then he made eye contact with one of the nurses. "Take over," Blake told him, nodding down to Sophia.

The nurse dropped to the floor, counted down from three, and took over compression from Sophia in a fluid movement. Sophia scrambled back, getting out of the way of Blake and the other nurse.

She watched them, eagle-eyed, as they worked on Ronnie.

Hooked up to machinery.

V-fib.

Shock.

Epi.

Another shock.

More epi.

Shock again.

Ronnie took in a breath, and Sophia felt herself breathing with her. More medical personnel had come in, armed with a gurney, and the whole team got Ronnie off the floor and whisked off to the Emergency Room.

Blake was one of the last to leave the room. Wiping his brow, he glanced back at Sophia, gave her a nod, and hurried after his colleagues.

The door slammed on the silent room. Sophia and the rest of the team all faced each other, no one sure of what to say.

"What do we do now?" Carmen finally broke the silence.

"HR will probably be down soon," Aaron, the only man who worked with them, said. "We should probably wait."

They went back to their separate desks, with no one working except Sophia. No one else was used to seeing people suddenly go into cardiac arrest, listening to bone breaking in the process of life-saving. But for Sophia, going back to work was all she knew, even if that work was just punching in numbers.

But then her fingers stilled over her keyboard. Her compressions were too good. Blake and the rest of the medical team who first came in would have noticed that. They were too good for a civilian. Sure, a lot of people trained in CPR, lifeguards and teachers and such, but compressions from a two-hour training were nowhere near as good as a medical professional.

Blake would know something was up, and Sophia doubted that he would fail to ask her about it. She would just have to lie, after all, what reason could he come up with as to why she would lie about being a medical professional?

A medical professional. More so than ever, Sophia felt like herself. And instead of upsetting her, the feeling lit a light inside of her. Maybe it was because she helped save a life. But maybe because, even just for a brief moment, she got to do what she was meant to be doing in life.

Aaron was right; HR sent a few people down to talk to each of them individually and let them know of the support available if they felt they needed it. Sophia tried to make her meeting with the representative brief. She was fine.

But not everyone was. Most went home early, a few took a couple of days off. But Sophia knew she would just sit in her apartment, wallowing about a variety of different things. So she agreed to come in. At least she would have plenty to do, with half the department out.

For the first time, Sophia didn't plan to just go straight home as soon as the clock hit five. She gathered her things and then headed down to the E.R., hoping Blake would still be on shift. She looked around the emergency department warily, feeling out of place even though no one really gave her a second glance. Her shoulders relaxed when she saw Blake in a breakroom.

He looked up as she tapped on the door, his expression changing from confusion to understanding in an instant. "Come in, come in," he said, waving her toward him. "She's going to be okay."

"Yeah, that's what HR said," Sophia said. "But they were sparse on any other details."

"Well, I can't tell you much, HIPPA and all that," Blake said.

"But..."

"But if you're going to have a heart attack, doing it in a hospital is a good choice," he said. "And if you're not going to do it in front of a doctor, your second best option is doing it in front of someone who knows what they're doing when it comes to CPR."

And there it was.

"You've done that before." It wasn't a question.

There was no point in denying it. "I was a lifeguard in high school." Not a lie, but Sophia hadn't been doing many chest compressions. Most of her time was spent yelling at kids for running and cleaning out poop from the pool.

Blake gave her a doubtful look. It was a horrible excuse, Sophia knew that. Even if lifeguards received more comprehensive training, high school was over a decade ago. "You must have been a hell of a lifeguard."

Sophia just shrugged.

"That's not easy, you know," Blake continued. "Training is one thing, but jumping into action when stuff like that happens. And being able to break bone. Hell, the first time I broke someone's rib doing compressions, I cried."

Sophia couldn't help the side of her mouth quirking up. She had seriously considered dropping out of nursing school her first time. "Well, I guess I just have good instincts."

"Those instincts saved a life, today." Blake put his hand on her shoulder. "You should be proud, Sadie."

Sadie would be proud. But Sophia couldn't help the nausea that rose in her at the fact that if Blake knew she was a nurse, his words would be incredibly condescending. But he didn't know that, he had no way of knowing it. And at least he was buying her story of minimal training and good instincts.

"Right, well, thanks." Sophia took a step back, letting his hand fall off of her shoulder. "I should get going."

"I'm off in an hour," Blake said, stopping her before she could make her escape. "Some of us are getting drinks, and if I'm being honest, there are a lot of people here who want to meet the admin woman who knows how to do proper chest compressions. You should join us."

Sophia couldn't even be surprised at the fact that people wanted to meet her. If nonmedical personnel at Ronald Reagan showed that they had some skill, she would want to meet them as well. But she shook her head. "I'm good, thanks," she said. "I just want to get home."
Blake didn't look surprised, but slightly disappointed. "Then I'll see you around, Sadie."

"Bye, Blake."

And Sophia didn't really want to go. Already, there were too many people who called her Sadie, and she still wasn't up for socializing. But she also had to go and tell Jamie what had just happened. She figured the F.B.I. would want to know.