THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT

(Warning ⚠️ use of homophobic slurs )

[9:00 pm, 3rd August]

"Holy Heaven! What is this enchanted viand?" Harry asks, astonishment obvious in his wide eyes as he stuffs another spoonful of the mint-flavored dessert in his mouth.

"It's ice cream." Louis chuckles at the boy's amazement over something as simple as Ice Cream.

"It is incredibly delightful." Gushes the angel and Louis nods.

"I know right?" He smiles and Harry peeks at the boy to flash him a smile in return but his breath hitches at the sight, his whole body going still along with his hand that was about to shove the spoonful of ice cream in his mouth. "What?" The shorter boy raises his eyebrows, perplexed when he notices the way Harry is gazing at him with his mouth agape. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He looks around bothered and baffled.

"You are exceedingly and fascinatingly gorgeous, especially when you smile." Harry admires and Louis could feel the surface of his cheeks fogging up crimson. He coughs and blinks down at the bowl of ice cream, trying to hide his rubricating face. Such an incandescent stare over something as stupid as my smile, he internally scoffs.

What an exaggeration, he thinks wanting to laugh at Harry's humour.

"Well, thank you, Angel. You're very pretty yourself." He settles upon replying instead, making Harry grin like a child and shove another spoonful of ice cream between his lips.

Both the boys have eaten their dinner and are now sitting on the edge of Louis' bed, enjoying their dessert as a John Mayer song plays through Louis' phone from the study table. They occasionally chat and make small talk over the soft music. It's peaceful in a way and both the boys love it.

"Angel, stop!" Louis scolds, feeling shy as the other boy keeps on gawping at him. Even when Louis asks him to stop, he continues giving him side glances and bursts out laughing when Louis catches his eyes. "You're so annoying." Louis groans, his face feeling hot regardless of the cold treat they're devouring.

"I can not help it. You are austerely so mystic and fascinating and mesmerising that I can not look away." Harry confesses sincerely, though he laughs as he finds Louis' reaction thoroughly amusing and precious.

"Stop flirting with me!" Louis whines out of agitation. "If you don't stop it, I swear to god I'll hit you with this spoon." He threatens, waving his spoon at the Angel who throws his head back laughing at the blue-eyed boy.

Eventually, Harry stops laughing and goes back to eating his ice cream. Louis bites his lip, his cheeks still surfacing the shade of red. After an entire minute of no movement from the Angel, the shorter boy sneaks a look at him. Now he wasn't planning on staring, nope, but the green-eyed boy is just so appealing. He gapes in infatuation at how Harry's face had a natural golden glow and his cheeks amassed a very light shade of pink. You could only see it if you looked long and close enough, but it was there and it made the Angel look way prettier. Louis' eyes mooch lower as they take in the mold of the naturally plump cherry lips. They're slightly pouty and just the perfect shape and color to make anyone crave them. He intently watches as the pair of lips curl into a smirk and flinches when they start talking.

"Who is staring now?" Harry asks, peering mischievously at the shorter boy.

"I- I was only checking if you're staring." Louis tries to cover up, his face turning red in embarrassment.

"Of course you were." The green-eyed angel giggles and Louis glares at him, feeling offended.

"Shut it!" He chides making the angel only giggle more. "Annoying." Louis mutters, scowling at him.

"Adorable." Harry retorts, beaming gleefully at the smaller boy.

Louis only shakes his head and glints fondly at that. How could anyone ever be mad or annoyed by this beautiful Angel when his smile evidently could melt a heart? They fall into another short-lived comfortable silence, both smiling down at their ice creams, just feeling at ease beside each other.

"Hey, Angel?" Louis calls, breaking the silence, and Harry hums in response, his mouth too busy to talk. "Do we really go to Heaven when we die?" He asks, pondering about it in his head. He was told about Heaven when he was a kid, but since he wasn't much of a believer, he never gave a second thought over the existence of Heaven. But now that Harry, an Angel who apparently fell from Heaven, is sitting right beside him, he's not that sure anymore.

"I do not know." Yaks Harry without perking up from his bowl, but Louis notices his lips curving into a not-so-subtle smirk.

"You're not gonna tell me, are you?" Louis probes, to which the taller boy shakes his head, making him pout at the ice cream. "No one ever told me that Angels can be mean." The blue-eyed boy mutters under his breath, but Harry giggles anyway. Of course, he can hear it, he thinks.

He just bites his lip to restrain himself from smiling but fails. How can one not smile when a literal Angel is giggling so cutely beside them? He stares down at his now-empty bowl with a pout, contemplating whether he should get more ice cream or not. Both the boys once again fell into a short silence before Harry decided to break it this time.

Or one could say he shatters it.

"Lou?" He calls and Louis smiles at the nickname as he raises his eyebrows at the taller one questioningly. "What is a faggot?" He asks, shifting his eyes back to the ice cream bowl and Louis' smile drops as he gulps, his eyes growing wide and dreadful.

"Wha- where did you-" he shakily tries to ask the boy, his throat drying out too rapidly to throw those words at the boy.

"I heard someone call it to someone else. I did not really recognise the word as to what it was, to be honest. Is it something bad?" He asks innocently, not noticing that Louis had started heaving. "So bad to the point it is disgusting?" The Angel wonders out loud and Louis finds himself struggling to figure out if he was choking or hyperventilating. "Are faggots supposed to be treated cruelly for being what they are?" He continues, eyes rooted to the bowl in his lap while Louis labors to get his voice out as his eyes pool up with tears. "Does it mean it is okay for a human to persecute another human solely because they are faggot?" Harry asks woefully, gripping at his bowl and not realizing how his words are affecting the boy beside him. "To be honest, I do not find it justi-"

"Sh-shut up, Harry! Please.. just- just shut up!" Louis ultimately manages to breathe out harshly, realizing that he might be having a panic attack. Thankfully Harry stops speaking and Louis doesn't bother to check if the Angel had noticed him struggling yet. Not like he'd know what to do anyway. Meds! He remembers. The meds his therapist had given him ages ago for his panic attacks could be expired for all he knows, but he could take a chance right now. The bowl of ice cream tumbles down his lap and on the floor when he attempts to get up, but the feeling of lightheadedness gets to him. He drops to his knees, his hand knocking the fallen bowl farther away from the couch. With his body frantically trembling, sweating to no end, he feels the world around him spinning. He clutches his chest when he feels his heart racing to the point that it might burst off inside his chest. He feels sick, he feels the need to throw up but he can't move his body and he's conscious enough to not do it here. He starts seeing black beads in his vision as his eyelids feel heavier and start dropping shut.

Louis is sure he's about to pass out when suddenly like a shot, in a beat of his racing heart, before another droplet of sweat could drip down his hair, everything calms down. Every single muscle and nerve in his body relaxes. He falls at peace when a pair of hands touch his cheeks, cupping them softly. His body stops sweating and shaking, his heart slows down, breaths getting back to normal, his vision is back to being clear as he opens his eyes and meets Harry's wide, green guilty ones. He isn't sure if it's his mind playing optical tricks on him, but he can swear the green of the Angel's eyes are at least five shades lighter at this moment.

"Better?" Asks Harry and Louis gives him a slight nod, realising this was the Angel's healing touch, something the folks, legends, and the Bible be talking about. It's unbelievably wild to think it could be something real and he just had the first-hand experience of it. A simple touch from the Angel brought his panic attack to a stop before it could become a problem that would've been needed to be checked by a doctor.

He leans his face into Harry's hands and the boy who's cradling his cheeks brings Louis' face closer to his own until their foreheads gently meet the other's. Harry's soft touches radiated comfort, or maybe his entire body does but Louis isn't complaining because that is exactly what the shorter boy needs right now. He clenches his eyes shut to stop the tears from escaping, but it's too late now since they're already flowing freely over his cheeks and gliding down Harry's arms.

The Angel stares at the boy in confusion and worry before he gets the urge to peep for the reason behind such a reaction he got from Louis. He searches in his past and finds a lot of events where a young Louis is facing the same thing as the boy in the coffee shop. He sees a group of boys pushing Louis against a wall, throwing punches at him, kicking him and calling him names. His heart wrenches to see such a young Louis crying and moaning in pain on the ground, blood trickling down his eyebrows, cheekbones, and the corner of his mouth. What hurts Harry the most is to see all of that happening every day for a few years. He sees a particular incident that he could see it marked a huge impact on Louis' present. He concentrates on the occurrence where a boy is sitting on Louis' back, while the blue-eyed boy is forced to lay on the floor under him with three other boys fastening his hands and legs to hold him down. The gray-eyed boy sitting on Louis' lower back pulls out a switchblade from his pocket, laughing maniacally, which causes Louis to scream out in fear.

"Faggot," Harry hears Louis' voice and brings himself back to the boy. "is a boy who likes another boy. A disgusting piece of shit who worths nothing and only deserves to die." Louis says in a monotone, pulling himself away from Harry who recognizes the words as those been quoted by the gray-eyed boy with a switchblade who beat him up. "A man is supposed to love a woman and vice versa. It's a rule and if you break it, you deserve hell. And you don't even have to wait until you die to experience that hell." He lets out an ironic chuckle.

"No one deserves that, Louis." Harry objects as he gently takes Louis' hand in his own. "It does not matter who you love as long as you love. Not everyone is capable of loving someone, but if you are, then you deserve Heaven no matter what." He affirms to the boy and brings him closer again when he bursts into tears. "No one gets to decide your worth, Lou, regardless of who you are and who you love. No human has the right to pass a judgement on another human, it is like calling someone dumb when you could simply be deaf. Not just humans but animals or birds or insects or any living creature on earth is not righteous enough to contrast between nature and flaws. A crow has no right to laugh at a cat for not flying as it is not a bird, but it also has no right to laugh at a penguin or tell it that it is not a bird just because it cannot fly. Like, how about we take you for a swim in that freezing water, Mr. Mean Crow?" He mimics a funny voice making the boy crying in his arms let out a muffled chuckle. "Every individual creature have their own nature, Louis, their own special or typical, regardlessly beautiful essence. Being different is not a flaw, love. A flaw is when you believe being different is a flaw." He holds the boy tightly who cries in the crook of his neck.

They remain just like that on the floor, Harry with his legs spread out with Louis sitting between them, holding on to the Angel for dear life. Harry rubs the smaller boy's back as his cries die down to little hiccups. After a while, Harry pulls back a little and cradles Louis' face in his hands as he peers deep into his eyes while speaking.

"You are priceless, Louis. You are unique, there is no other creature just like you and there is not one supposed to be either. You are wonderful just the way you are. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise, you are perfect." He says firmly and wipes Louis' cheeks with his thumbs. "Absolutely and utterly and entirely perfect and that," He looks straight into the smaller one's eyes. ".. is an absolute judgement from Heaven." He firmly proclaims, offering Louis a warm smile and maybe a contagious one because the boy smiles right back.

"Thank you, love." Louis croaks out and cuddles into Harry's warmth again, not noticing the blush that creeps upon the Angel's cheeks at the nickname. "You're coming home with me tomorrow." Louis announces, his voice muffled by the sweatshirt Harry is wearing.

"Home?" The taller boy wonders and Louis pulls back to nod at him.

"Tomorrow is Lottie's birthday, so I'm going and I can't really leave you here alone. We'll leave in the morning and get back by night." Louis explains and Harry nods.

"Grasped. I will come home with you." Harry smiles and so does Louis.

"My family will love you." Louis grins, his eyes still glistening from tears, and Harry flashes him a shy smile. "Come on let's go to bed, gotta wake up early tomorrow." He whispers, wiping his face as he slowly stands up. He offers Harry a hand which the boy takes for support and gets up.

The boys, both head to Louis' bedroom, and the shorter boy realizes something as he halts in his track.

"Um.. you don't mind sleeping with me, do you?" He asks but then feels like it sounded way too wrong. "Uh... I mean, sharing a bed. Well, you can take the couch but it's very uncomfortable, so I wouldn't want you to sleep there since you're literally a baby giraffe and won't fit in it." Louis tries to explain and lets out an awkward chuckle.

"Grasped, we can share the bed." Harry instantly replies, already climbing up on Louis' bed and getting under the sheets.

"Well then." Louis laughs at the boy getting comfortable in his bed. "But let me warn you, I'm a big-time cuddler, so you better not complain if I suffocate you." He jokes as he strips down to his boxers, making Harry look away with his cheeks tinted pink. Louis hops onto the bed like a kid which makes the Angel giggle as the bed vibrates.

Louis lies on his back, looking up at the ceiling, thinking about how Emma is going to freak out when she sees Harry tomorrow. The girl had seen Harry's sketch and pretty sure she remembers it since she couldn't take her eyes off of Harry's face. Louis sighs and thinks about a lie to tell his girlfriend about why his fictional character is now real. And the fact that he hasn't told Emma that Harry will be joining them in Doncaster tomorrow will not be helping his situation either.

"Just tell her I am an old friend and 'Lover boy' was inspired by my appearance." Louis hears and whips his head to see Harry already looking at him.

"How the fuck do you know what I was thinking?!" He asks in a bewildered tone and Harry smiles.

"You were thinking very hard, so I got curious and took a peek at your thoughts." The Angel explains, shrugging like it's nothing.

"You what now!?" Louis almost yells before sighing. "Why am I even surprised at this point?! Anyway, Angel, don't do that... unless I tell you to." He requests quietly.

"Grasped." Harry whispers and shifts his body closer to Louis'. "Do you mind if I hold you?" He whispers again and Louis' breath hitches at how close Harry's face is and how beautifully innocent the Angel looks as he asks that question. He wordlessly stares into the big, bright green eyes and thinks about how just a day ago he had fallen in love with the colour. He lowers his gaze to Harry's pouty lips and subconsciously licks his own seeing how plump, pink, and perfect lips the Angel has. Before his mind can race with any kind of inappropriate thoughts, he is snapped back to reality by the feeling of an arm around his waist.

"Like this? Is it alright?" Harry asks and Louis nods, trying his best to ignore whatever's going wild in his tummy. He feels his skin heating up where the Angel is touching his bare waist and goosebumps forming around it.

Louis shifts on his side to face Harry and moves his hand up to the nape of the taller boy's neck. He lets his fingers intertwine with Harry's loose curls as he moves a little closer to the boy.

"How long do you think it will take for me to find love?" Harry whispers, his breath fanning over Louis' lips.

"I don't know, Angel. But surely, it won't be too long until someone falls madly in love with you." Louis says softly, his thumb now caressing Harry's cheek.

"You think so?" Harry asks with a blush coating his cheeks.

"I know so. I mean, look at you, you're so damn beautiful. Who could ever resist you?" The shorter boy whispers, letting his thumb glide over Harry's lips. "You're the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on, Angel, I don't think anyone could look at you and not instantly fall in love." He says and Harry gives him a shy smile.

"Thank you, Louis." He whispers and hides his flushed face into Louis' neck, who moves his hand to lightly scratch at the taller one's scalp. His other hand finds its way to the Angel's bare hip since the sweatshirt he's wearing has ridden a little higher.

After a few minutes, Harry's breathing evens out and one of his legs comes to tangle itself with Louis'. The smaller one is wide awake still, breathing heavily at all the intimate touches that Harry probably isn't even aware of. Surely, the Angelic creature knows about sex, but he doesn't know how it works for Humans or how it starts at least. He definitely doesn't know the boundaries of a platonic relationship and Louis doesn't want to take advantage of that... but there's nothing he can do about it. As he said, Harry is so damn beautiful, who could ever resist him?
__________

WC: 3,352 words
DOP: 30/12/21

FOTC: This is the most edited chapter so far... Like it's one of my favorite chapters and that whole "panic attack" scene is one of my favorite scenes but even now I can't put the exact emotions into words there. It's an important part and I get quite a feeling when the scene plays in my head but no matter how many words I play with, I can't pen down the exact same feeling :/

WOTC 📗: I wish to avoid attracting people and potential friends man... They're real troublesome.

Author's note: I was looking for reference pictures for this chapter on Pinterest with the search "Boyfriends cute aesthetic" and the amount of Louis and Harry pictures I came across... Not even Larry but them both in their own concerts like ¿?

I'm trying to figure out how posting on AO3 works but I can't... This ol' lil grandma needs help :'(

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Harry being so excited over ice cream

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Louis: *asks Harry to stop looking*

Harry:

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Louis: "I'll hit you with a spoon"

Liam:

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Louis: "Something as stupid as my smile"

Harry and us:

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Harry and us after learning about Louis' past

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Louis: He doesn't know the boundaries of a platonic relationship

Harry: platoni-

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Anyway please don't forget to vote and comment if you like! (even tho not many people are reading this yet :/ )

💕

Last edited: 09/16/2023