I've never felt like this. I've never felt so much pain. You came after me and attacked right when I was the weakest. You came like a tsunami and destroyed everything,even after I tried to prevent it. And I tried to control you,to get rid of you. But I can't anymore. You've won.
You've won,my blue feelings. And after all this years of war, you've won in a battle that lasted only a few hours. You've destroyed my orange calmness, flooded my milky pink nature, massacred all the things my beautiful wise violet gave me, you murdered my one and only yellow happiness.
All the precious things I've gathered along the years to fight you,are now forgotten and their memories replaced with your emotions. The emotions I was always afraid you'll give me.
But I know why,and I can't help it. I'm human and no human can fight you. I know that it's part of my growth,and because I'm growing I became weaker.
Because I'm growing I fell in love with someone who may never love me back, because I'm growing I'm sad that the only friends I've got will be gone for a while and that'll be when I need them the most,not because they want to but because they have no choices, because I'm growing I found out I have anxiety and get panicked when I try to speak to people and that's why I can't make friends, it's because I'm growing that I can't take the mental abuse I get from my own family.
Because I'm growing, I got weak and you used that to finish me.
You make me write this in the bathroom crying my life out, trying to not make a sound so no one in the house is suspicious.
You took everything good from me,and now I'm enveloped by you.
I want try to be optimistic,like I always was and accept you, because even if I hate you, you're part of my life,but I can't, because you took even my last drop of that.
I can't save myself from you anymore.
I give up! So just leave me alone,my blue feelings!
Please...,just leave me alone...