THIS CHAPTER IS IN FRANK'S POV IT WILL PROBABLY BE THE ONLY ONE THAT IS

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I walked home after work, ready to just relax. It was a kind of hard day today, but none of that was because of my job. It was everything with Gee that I kept getting distracted by while trying to teach my classes. It's just all getting so confusing and I'm not even sure what to think anymore. Whether to be with him or not is probably the hardest decision I've ever had to make.

I grabbed a beer and sat down on the couch, wanting to just unwind. Unfortunately I knew that later on I'd have to grade papers and work some more but I'll leave that for later. At that moment the door opened and Jamia walked in, setting her backpack down and smiling.

"Hey there, baby girl," I greeted with a smile.

Jamia smiled and sat across my lap. "Hi daddy."

"How was school today?" I asked. "Were your professors okay?"

"It was fine, it was just really boring," she said.

I chuckled and gave her a kiss.

"How about we cuddle and watch a movie," I suggested.

She smiled and nodded.

"Lemme go get my paci," she said.

I nodded as she got up and went towards the bedroom while I put on Up, which is one of her favorite moves. She cuddled up with me under a blanket, as we watched it.

"I wish we could attach balloons to our house to make it fly," Jamia said, her paci in her hand.

"Yeah?" I asked.

She nodded. "Except I would take our house somewhere nice and pretty and we can live together happily ever after."

I smiled down at her, watching her look at the screen. I couldn't possibly manage to break her heart. The precious girl in my arms didn't deserve anything bad to happen to her. The movie eventually ended and Jamia was getting a little bit whiny. She had eaten lunch on her college campus but it was starting to get a little late and I knew it was around dinner time.

"Daddy, my tummy is rumbly," Jamia complained.

"Let's go cook something," I said. "What do you want, babydoll?"

"Can I please have spaghetti?" She asked.

"Well, since you asked so nicely then I guess we can," I agreed.

She cheered and stood up, heading to the kitchen while I followed. Jamia sat on the kitchen island while I started cooking.

"You know how I was going dress shopping while you were at that meeting on Saturday?" Jamia asked.

I nodded my head, but knew that I wasn't actually at a meeting, I had been on a date with Gee.

"I finally found a wedding dress and it's so pretty!" She exclaimed. "It's got like some parts that are sparkly and it's so nice and it's strapless and amazing."

"Well, I'm sure you're going to look absolutely beautiful in it," I said, giving her a kiss while the noodles boiled and I leaned against the counter.

"I can't wait for our wedding!" Jamia exclaimed excitedly. "It's gonna be so perfect!"

I chuckled. "Indoor voices, baby."

She blushed and nodded. "Sorry daddy, I'm just really excited."

I ran a hand through her hair, smiling as I kissed her forehead.

"I know you are," I said. "I'm excited too, baby,"

"We're finally getting married after all these years," she said dreamily.

I smiled. "I love you, Princess."

"I love you too, daddy," she said.

"Let's eat and then we can have some ice cream if you're good," I said and she nodded happily. "And then we can cuddle in bed and go to sleep."

Jamia smiled at me and gave me a kiss. I dumped out the excess water in the pot, leaving the noodles and pouring a jar of spaghetti sauce on it. I put it onto two plates, the princess one being for Jamia. She took them to the table while I grabbed my beer, that I still hadn't finished, and poured some juice into a sippy cup for her.

"We still need to go pick out a cake," Jamia reminded me as we ate. "Daddy, can we one that's tiered? Those ones are so pretty."

"Of course we can, babydoll, we can get any kind you want," I said.

"Can it have little flowers on them and have the little wedding topper people?" She asked.

"Of course it can, sweetheart," I reassured her.

She smiled and we continued on with our dinner. I looked at the grey food in front of me. It looked a lot more unappetizing now than the brownies yesterday that were in color. Everything seemed so much worse when it wasn't in color. The dull walls with the dull furniture and the dull food and the dull people. I miss Gee's bright red hair. I miss the blue sky. I miss everything else that I just don't know the names of. There's so many, it seems so hard to understand it all.

"Are you okay, daddy?" Jamia asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I noticed that she was almost done with her food and I had barely taken two bites.

"Yeah, baby, I'm just not all that hungry," I said.

I took a drink of my beer and she looked at me in concern.

"Are you sick? Do you need to go to the doctors?" Jamia questioned worriedly.

"No, baby, I just had a big lunch at work," I lied.

"Oh, okay," she muttered.

I reached over and held onto her hand, noticing how there weren't the same sparks as there was with Gee. She giggled quietly and I smiled. It was nice what we had, we were content and happy. But now that Gee came along I was starting to question everything.

"I'm done, daddy," Jamia said.

I smiled, standing up and kissing her forehead.

"C'mon, Princess, let's go get ready for bed," I said.

We went to our bedroom as we changed. She wore one of my shirts that were big on her with panties and I stripped down to just my boxers. We brushed our teeth, crawling into bed together as I turned off the lights. Jamia rested her head sleepily against my chest. I stroked her short hair gently, kissing the top of her head.

"I love you so much," Jamia mumbled sleepily.

"I love you too, babydoll," I said.

I noticed the way her breathing evened out, her body falling still as she fell asleep. I gently moved her head off me and onto the pillow as I stood up. I walked out of the room quietly, going down to my office. I started to grade papers, but kept getting distracted still. Some were great, but no words could ever capture the beauty of what I see with Gee. He's shown me things I've never thought possible, shown me things I couldn't even imagine in my wildest dreams. Part of me just wanted to drop everything and go with him. Everything is different without him, a world without him is just dull.

There was definitely something between us, something that made us destined to be together. And maybe we are soulmates like he says. I could imagine us being together, I could imagine us having a life together and growing old together. Something has compelled me towards him ever since the beginning. I tried to deny it at first and keep him away but now I don't think I can. Now I just want him more and more. I wish I could go to his house now to see him. But it was a school night and I know he's in high school and that he has work to do. It was starting to get late, he was probably getting ready for bed.

"Fuck it," I muttered.

I reached for my phone, dialing his number and holding it up to my ear.

"Hello?" Gee asked, his voice sounding a little sleepy.

"I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you, you were probably going to bed," I said quickly, going to hang up.

"No, no!" He said hurriedly. "I wasn't going to bed, I was just studying for a test and I was dozing off a little because I was bored."

"Okay, at least I didn't bother you too much," I said. "I'm sorry for calling."

"Why did you call?" Gee asked.

"I just...I just wanted to hear your voice," I admitted quietly.

"I miss you," Gee said.

"I miss you too," I whispered honestly.

When we were on our date three days ago it was just so great. For that time I had forgotten about Jamia and how I was engaged to her, as horrible as that sounds. It was just me and Gee and I was so happy. We had fun, some of the most fun I've had in a while.

"Do you think we can go on another date soon?" Gee asked hopefully. "I miss spending time with you, I miss your voice and your kisses."

"I do too but...you know what we're doing is wrong, right?" I asked.

"It's true love," Gee stated.

"That doesn't change the fact that I'm engaged," I said.

"So, you don't want to see me?" He asked quietly, his voice sounding sad.

"No, of course I wanna see you," I denied. "God, I wanna see you so badly, I wanna kiss you and hold your hand so we can see everything the world has to offer."

"I want that too," Gee said. "How about Friday? Can we go on a date then?"

"I think I have more wedding planning stuff that day, I think I'm meeting with the florists," I said. "But maybe we can do something tomorrow night, if you're available on a school night. I can tell my wife I have to fill in teaching one of the night classes."

"Yeah, tomorrow night is perfect," he said.

"Great, I'll pick you up then," I said. "Now go to sleep, it's late. Actually you have studying to do, mister."

"But it's so boring," Gee complained.

"If you get it done then you can have a treat tomorrow," I said.

"Okay," Gee said, but the way the sentence stopped so suddenly it sounded like he was going to say more. Almost like he might've called me daddy, or something along those lines. But maybe that was just in my head because I wanted him to call me it. Even though I know I shouldn want that.

"Sweet dreams, Gee," I whispered.

We hung up and I looked down at the papers that I finished grading. The door opened and Jamia poked her head in, a sleepy look on her face.

"C'mere, baby," I said.

She came over and sat in my lap as I cradled her, hearing her quickly fall back asleep. Being with Gee was nice, it felt right and like there was something that pulled us together. But I was also content and happy with Jamia. This all used to be so much easier when it was just Jamia and I.