Knock, Knock, Knock!

               I groaned, who the hell is bothering me this late? Wait what time is it? I got up and checked my phone. Aw man, it's time to get up for school. Was that my alarm clock or did someone actually just knock on my door? I looked over at my roommate but he was gone, his bed was a mess so he must have left not long ago.

               I probably only heard it in my head. Sigh. I got up and stared at my floor, I don't like feeling tired when I'm supposed to be going to classes. It's a terrible feeling, honestly.

                Knock, Knock, Knock!

               Oh shit, it was real.

               I ran to the door, expecting to see my roommate, he forgets his key a lot, but when I opened the door I was surprised to see Jesse. He had a wide smile and held a Dunkin Donut bag on his hand.

               I rubbed my eyes. "Um, hi."

               "Good morning, I bought you breakfast. Careful, there is a cup of coffee in there," He said as he handed me the bag.

                As soon as he handed me the bag, he ran away really fast. I popped my head out of my room and watched just as he turned around the corner and disappeared. I looked down on the bag and closed the door.

               This is pretty much what he did every single morning for the past week. He'd arrive on my doorstep, give me food then run away leaving me confused. He even gave me my space on the only class we had. I thought it was sweet, it meant he cared.

               Not to mention that he'd come to my room and deliver me lunch. And also run away again. I think the only reason he's running away is because he doesn't want to be alone with me in my room, things happen, scary things.

               If you know what I mean. But I wouldn't try to do anything, I'd never push a person like that.

               Specially Jesse.

               Now it was Thursday, and I was on my way to my last class - the one I shared with Jesse. He didn't really speak to me that much this week. It honestly made me upset but I understood. It's a school week and I'm sure he was busy with his homework and such. 

               He also had a lot of thinking to do. Yet it didn't stop him from sending me random text messages that made me laugh during my quiet moments in my classes. It was embarrassing. There was one time where he sent me a picture of a turkey that looked like it had a human private area, male one at that, and I just couldn't hold it. I had to walk out of the class room and then I died.

               I walked through my last class and pouted when I didn't see him sitting at his usual spot. The class didn't have that many students, it was my most empty class. I took my seat and immediately took out my notebook and stared copying the board - which was filled with a lot of shit. These notes are the ones I need for when I take a test. Important, so I need to copy them everyday because they change.

               Then I have to get started on my work, it's a lot. I never have a break.

               But luckily I have Jesse to make it all better. He takes away my stress, my sadness, anything that messes with my head, he just takes it all away and replaces it with happiness.

               "Hey," I heard the familiar voice, I looked up as Jesse threw himself next to me. "I'm sorry that I didn't get you lunch today, I had a small doctor's appointment."

               "That's fine. Is everything okay?"

               He nodded. "Just a check up. I hate it so much. And we can get lunch together after class if you want."

               Well it's Thursday and I don't have classes tomorrow. So why not?

               "Sure."

               The bell rang and everyone's chatter subsided. The teacher began talking, continuing on the lesson we had yesterday. Jesse kept tapping his leg against mine, it annoyed me but I let him do it - if it makes him happy, why stop the guy?

               I don't really think he paid much attention to the lesson, he had his eyes glued to his pen. And for some reason he kept trying to put it in his mouth. 

               When the bell rang, everyone got up except Jesse and I. My fault we're a little behind, I have to do a little more work than everyone since I came late in the semester. But it's fine, the work was easy and the book had all the answers.

               Jesse laid his head on me, which honestly made me melt. I wanted to concentrate so bad on my work but holy shit his head is on me. The scent of his hair drove me wild, it was so enticing and appealing that it distracted me.

               "Are you done yet?" He muttered into my arm.

               "Almost."

               I worked my pencil like magic and finished faster than I expected. Hm, that could be taken the wrong way if said at the wrong time.

               "I'm done," I told Jesse and I got up from my chair. My ass hurt like hell.

               Jeez, the more time I spent with Jesse the more my thoughts become dirty, or at least more noticeable in a dirty way. 

               I ran down the steps and headed to Mr. Cox's desk and handed him the papers.

               He took it and stared at them while he nodded. "Nice work Mr. Byrne."

               "Thank you, have a good weekend sir."

               "You boys take care," He said as we both dashed up the steps and out of the class room.

               "Ready to go?" Jesse asked me when we exited the campus and headed towards the dorm building.

               "I gotta check something on my laptop first. Is that okay?"

               "Can I come with?"

               "Sure."

               It would be the first time that he'd enter my room. I feel like I have to remember our first time for everything. When he enters my mouth, when he enters my room, when he enters my life, when he enters me. Okay I didn't mean that last one.

               Maybe?

               Wow, Rayne, you're having a party of your own in your head aren't you?

               Yes, it's an amazing party.

               I took out my key from my wallet and pushed it in the knob.

               "Yeah, push it," He said.

               I stopped pushing it and tried to keep a straight face at him but I just ended up chuckling. I twisted it quickly and entered my room. Jesse ran past me and jumped on my bed as I walked towards my desk and turned on my laptop.

               "I like your bed, smells like you."

               "I'm not sure what to respond to that," I muttered calmly as I signed on my Email account and saw the message from my cousin. I didn't get fired! Yay. Now I have to read this huge ass term and agreement paper then print it out and sign it.

               I started to read the huge ass message.

               "You know that penguins can sometimes be homosexuals?" He said.

               "Yeah," I answered and re-read the sentence I just misplaced with penguins being homosexuals.

               "So are they born that way or hatched that way?"

               "Jesse, I'm trying to read something."

               His nosy ass self crawled to the end of my bed and he hovered in front of my screen. I pushed him back and kept reading.

               "What are you reading?"

               "An email from my cousin, it's about the job."

               "Oh, oops, sorry," He pressed his lips together and fell back on my bed.

               It took me so long to read the whole thing, like five minutes, yeah that's long. I pressed the print button and waited for the printer to start doing it's job.

               Once it printed out the papers I grabbed a pen and signed my name like seven times throughout the whole thing. Thank God I had an envelope. I don't think folding this would be good for my image. I neatly shoved the papers inside and wrote my cousin's work address on the front of it. Then I taped a post stamp and bam. Done.

               I don't know why I can't just hand it over, why do I have to mail it? Stupid cousin, acting like shes somebody important and needs things to be mailed to her.

              "There's a mailbox in front of the entrance. They check it everyday so you should hurry up and shove it in," He smirked. Again with the innuendos.

               I ran out the door and made my way towards the front of the building and saw the blue mailbox. I ran to it then shoved the envelope in and made my way back to my room.

               Jesse was now on the floor, doing I had no idea what. 

               "What are you doing?"

               "I fell."

               "Then get up?"

              "I'm too comfortable. I'm enjoying this position."

               Really?

               "Do you want to stay instead?" I asked him.

               I could easily tell that he got nervous. "Um, no. Let's go."

               "Can I at least change? I don't want to look like I just came out of school," I eyed my clothes.

               "Go ahead."

               I waited for him but he didn't move. "Well I'm not doing it while you're in the room."

               "Why not? Stop being shy around me. I don't bite. I only lick."

               I looked at him weird. "Do you see all of your friends get undressed or something?"

               "Uh, haven't you noticed that everyone practically walks around naked?"

               "I'm not everyone."

               "Fine," He groaned and closed my door when he exited.

               I shook my head. "Idiot," I muttered.

               "I heard that."

               "Step away from the door!" I said loudly.

               I rushed through my room, gathering clothes that would make Jesse think I'm still cute as a bunny. I don't want to dress like his friends, baggy pants, long ass shirts and stupid huge shoes that have the laces all over the place. I don't dress like that and never well. I actually dress good, too good?

               "You done yet?" He suddenly popped out as I took off my shirt.

               "Close the door you jerk!" I yelled and threw my shirt at his face.

               He closed it but kept my shirt. Ugh. I skipped towards the door with my pants at my ankles and locked the damn door. I jumped around as I put on my pants and shirt at the same time - didn't work out so well. I ended up looking like a mess so I started again and did it slowly.

               "You almost done?" I heard him sigh.

               "Sorry, gays like to take their time."

               I put on my black boots then finally finished. I sprayed myself twice with cologne and jumped in front of the mirror. Now I looked better, not so much like a school nerd. I smiled proudly at myself and unlocked the door.

               "Mind if I borrow your shirt?" He asked, "I like it."

               "Only if you don't forget to return it. Where is it though?"

               "In my room. You took a while so I had the time to go to my room and back."

               "Well I'm done."

               "I can see that," His eyes darted down and up at me, "you look great."

               "Thanks."

               "Better without a shirt on but I can deal with this too."

               I wanted to slap him now. He did that on purpose, I know it. It's like he had it planned. The jerk.

               We walked together, side by side, to the parking lot. He was starting to grow on me, I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. I just really don't want to get hurt, that's all. I don't think Jesse would hurt me though, I can feel it in my heart. Just by the way he speaks to me, I could just tell he won't. But that's just my feelings talking, I don't actually know shit.

               "I know this good restaurant, it's next to a boating dock. They have good food."

               "Sounds great."

               "Rayne! Jesse!"

               I turned around and it was like watching in slow motion. Priscella was running up to us, boobs bouncing up and down as her girlfriends hosed her with water. I felt like my innocence was drawn out of my body from watching her boobs become soaked in water.

               For some reason I felt like covering Jesse's eyes, but then I forgot that he's not actually mine so he can look all he wants.

               "Hey...Priscella..." I said nervously as her boobs got closer to me.

               "Hey guys! I missed you! We have to hang out this weekend. Where are you two going?"

               "Lunch. What are you doing?" Jesse looked dead bored.

               "Car wash," She shrugged. "Are you two on a date?"

              "No," Jesse answered, again looking bored. Even with the two watermelons in front of us.

               "We just came out of a class together so we decided to just get lunch together," I answered, in a nicer tone than his.

               Priscella is freaking amazing so I don't know why he's acting strange. She's my first friend here and she was the nicest one.

                "Oh, alright," She seemed really out of breath. Of course she would be, specially carrying those watermelons. "Well you two have fun then, and don't forget about me!"

               She ran back to her friends, this time her ass cheeks bounced in slow motion. Oh God.

               "Was I the only one who saw that in slow motion?" I asked Jesse as we got in his car.

               He grinned. "Are you going straight now?"

               I furrowed my brows, what crazy none sense is he talking about? "Hell to the no. The only close I'd get to being straight is bisexual and I don't see that happening anytime soon."

               "Why is that?"

               Was he seriously asking me that. "Jesse, I don't like girls that way." I frowned.

               "I like girls...but I like you more than girls and food."

               "Wow, thanks so much," I said sarcastically.

               "So do you think we should follow that base thing?"

                "What base thing?"

               "You know, like first base, second base and third base."

               "We aren't going out..." I glared at him, "so no."

               "But we will."

               "You are very sure about what you want. That's good."

               He snorted. "Why do you have to make it sound like that? You knew I'd talk about it. I've already made my decision, so at the end of this lunch I'm going to ask you one last time. Final answer."

               "I didn't realize we were on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire show."

               "Well you'd make a beautiful price at the end. And you're worth more than a million dollars. You're priceless."

               Here comes another blush moment. I have a feeling I'm gonna be blushing all day. I should have brought like a mask or something. Anything to hide my face from Jesse's stare.

               "I'm that cheap that I don't have a price? I'm free?"

               He chuckled. "No, stupid. You worth too much that there isn't enough money to compare to you."

                "What ever you say," I flicked my invisible long hair back.

               "Can I at least hold your hand while I drive? It would make my day," He asked.

               Another blush. "I guess, if you want."

               He lifted his arm so I'd place mine underneath his, then he grabbed my hand and I felt a million butterflies flutter in my stomach. This was such a terrible feeling but I loved it. It made me feel good in an awkward way. Not to mention excited - happens a lot now.

               "Why is your hand cold?" He asked.

               "Why is your hand warm?" I retorted.

               "I guess we need each other to stay sane."

               "Maybe so..."

               "I honestly like you, Rayne. I want you to know that I'm not messing around. I'm serious."

               "I know you are."

               "And I'm still so sorry about being so mean to you. I was only pretending to be mean to fill the sorrow I had. But you made me feel a lot better."

               "It's okay, Jesse, I forgive you. I totally understand and it's in the past now."

               "So you're willing to put it all in the past and forget it ever happened?"

               I smiled. "For you, yeah."

               "Yay," He shook his head childishly, "I'm a good person again."

               "You've always been," I reminded him.

               We reached the restaurant and parked outside of it. It was cool looking, it looked like a huge hut. I could see the boats floating in the back, it looked pretty friendly, specially family friendly. Jesse ran around the car as I unbuckled my seat belt and he opened the door for me.

               "I'm a gentlemen, aren't I?"

               "Did you just compliment yourself?" I grinned.

               "Yep. I'm just big headed like that."

               Oh God...

               We walked inside the restaurant and a female waitress took us to an empty table, it was a four people table but there were no two people tables available. I liked how it was really open and I could just look out at the boats.

               "I like this place, it's relaxing," He said.

               "I like the breeze."

               "Doesn't it make you feel like you're in a tropical island?"

               "Aside from the other people and technology, yeah."

               I looked down on my menu as Jesse covered his face with his. Then he suddenly dropped it and looked at me. "Lunch is on me by the way, order what ever you want."

               "I'll pay you back when I get money."

                "No you won't."

               "What if I want to?"

               "Then I won't accept it."

               "Then I'll force you to take it or shove it in your wallet when you aren't looking."

               "And then I'd sneak in your room while you sleep and put the money back."

               Neither of us will win.

               We stayed quiet while we looked at the menu, Jesse kept looking up at me and as soon as I'd catch him he'd look down. He can look at me if he wants, it's not illegal to look.

               "Can I be honest with you?" He sighed.

               "Yes please."

               For a moment there I thought he was going to say he doesn't want to date me. "I'm not sure what to order, I keep thinking that I don't want to gross you out and eat a huge ass meal then burp myself to sleep."

               "Just be yourself, order everything on the menu if you want. You don't have to do anything for me, I'd like you even if you threw up on me."

               "Really?" He gave me an uncertain look, "because I can arrange that..."

               "Yup."

               "I guess I'll order this huge ass burger. I like meat."

               Another one...I think I have to go to a therapist myself. Everything I hear sounds so wrong to me.

                "Then order it."

                "I will!" He smacked the menu back on the table, "What about you?"

               "Well I don't really understand the menu. It has weird words that I've never seen before."

               "I'll help you. What do you like?"

               "I'm not really picky but something lighter than a burger."

               "They have this great spicy chicken sandwich, it's good. It comes with a lot of French fries. I remember Priscella ordered it and the fries alone made her feel pregnant."

               "Sounds good."

               "You want that? You sure? Don't say it just to shut me up."

               "I'm sure."

               The waitress came back five minutes ago and apologized, she said she fell on ice but she's fine. She took our orders and left quickly. Maybe it's because she's wearing high heels? You shouldn't wear high heels while you work as a waitress. 

               "So how are you liking school so far? Meet anyone yet?"

               "Yeah, I met a couple of people."

               "Anyone ... soft?"

               I narrowed my eyes. "Soft? You mean gay?"

               "Yeah."

               "Not that I know of. Why? Would you get jealous?"

               "Maybe..."

               I snorted and rested my chin on the table as I looked up at him. I liked how the sun brightened him and made his hair look really shiny and Godly looking. And when he'd look up his eyes would spark from the shine of the sun.

               We both stayed quiet, back to awkwardness. We know what we were both waiting - for the end of our lunch. When Jesse asks the big question again and I have to answer. Yes, or no? Get hurt or not get hurt?

               I've thought about it just like he has. I've gone through every single thought and I think I've made up my decision. I guess we'll see when he asks...sigh.

               The food arrived pretty quick for a place that is full of families. Jesse wasn't kidding when he said the burger was huge, and I had a lot of fries to last a month.

               "They really want to make us fat here, don't they?"

               "Don't worry, we'll go to the beach tomorrow and work out. You need that tan."

               "We're going to hang out again?"

               He glared at me with a long french fry in his mouth. "What?" He spoke with his mouth full. "You're already bored of me? You don't want to hang out with me?"

               "I do. But don't forget about the rest of your friends."

               "Oh, Rayne. You're so nice that I want to slap you. I've been friends with my friends for years. I'm sure they won't die if I don't hang out with them for a couple of days. Besides, you're more important now."

               "Really?"

              "Of course. I wouldn't be here if you didn't."

              "Aw, thanks Jesse. You sure make me feel like I matter to this world."

               "I..wait...what?...Are...wait..." He stuttered, "I'm actually not sure when you're being sarcastic or not."

               "I was being serious," I laughed.

               "Oh, then that's good. That's how my mom raised me. To be a gentlemen to who ever I end up dating in the future. She'd usually say it was a girl but parents never know what their kids will do in the future. And it's not like you're supposed to be excited when your kid comes out gay. Yay! I always wanted my son to be gay! But they can be understanding and supportive."

               "What would your mom think if she saw that you were dating a guy?"

               "Well she loves gays. Maybe that's how she got in my dad's mess. She has so many gay friends that it's scary. It's why I've stayed away from her for the past year or so. I was still trying to hate gays."

               "Aw, I bet she misses you."

               "She does. She tells me everyday. And I don't think she'd care if I dated a guy."

               "Well that's good...I think."

               "I'll tell you about my sister after we get to know each other better. She was amazing. Very amazing indeed."

               "I bet she was," I smiled at him.

               "Want to share a fry?" He smirked.

               "No..." I said slowly.

               "Oh come on. It's not like we're gonna kiss. Just take the French fry out of my mouth." He popped one in and leaned forward.

               "You're so weird," But I ended up taking the fry from his mouth with mine.

               "That's strangely attractive. I'm learning something new about myself everyday."

               "Like what?" I wondered as I chewed on the fry that came from his delicious looking mouth.

               "Like you now turn me on in a huge way."

               "Huge?"

               "Like fully. I just think about you and I really get this excited feeling and I love it!"

               "Are you high?"

               "High on you baby."

               I was terrified now. He likes me! Keep it cool, Rayne. Just grab that sandwich and eat it like there's no tomorrow. Or you can eat it very carefully. As if you're slowly planning the death of Jesse.

               Yeah, that's good. Creepy Rayne helps shy Rayne keep his cool.

               So now it was time for the big finale. We finished eating. We talked for like two hours straight or was it more? Who was counting? And now it's time for the question, I could already see it in his eyes, he was smirking at me cause he knew that I knew.

               "So, now it's time for the big question," He said as he grabbed my hands over the table. "Rayne..."

               "Jesse..." I said calmly, even though my insides were exploding.

               "Would you like to go out with me?"

                I gulped as I stared at his eyes and his persistent smile - even though I could see his own nerves piling by the thousands.

               I avoided his eyes, when I did, his hands squeezed mine. It's like he knew what I was going to say and got scared. He needs to stop reading my mind...Sigh...

               "I'd love to."

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[Author's Message...]

     Yall I'm so glad 2017 me is chill, cause this was so unchill