Ashkii was in the library, going through some notes when his phone vibrated. He looked over at it, frowning in confusion when he noticed the little purple logo on the notification tab.

Why would he be getting Instagram likes? He hadn't made a post in a while. He reached out for the phone, and clicked the notification, noticing that there were a few more when he got into the app. He looked at the username that seemed to be going as far back as two years to like photos, and when he noticed who it was, his ears warmed up.

Why was Giovanni just casually liking pictures from years ago? The situation made Ashkii both nervous and excited. On one hand, Giovanni was looking at him, but on another hand, Giovanni was looking at him. Ashkii wasn't that confident about how he looked now, in comparison to what Giovanni liked, and he was a lot less confident about what he looked like two years ago. He had been scrawnier, and maybe even shorter. He felt self-conscious, and an impulsive urge to bulk archive his photos ran through his mind, but then Giovanni would know he did that, and would ask him about it—or worse yet, Giovanni would notice he was online. So instead, he decided to put his phone aside and focus on his work, occasionally glancing at his phone screen when it vibrated on the table.

After about an hour of studying, Ashkii got up from his seat and picked up his books and phone. He took his time to look through the photos Giovanni had liked while he was sitting in his truck in the parking lot. A lot of them were photos with him in them, not the landscape and nature pics he'd been really into taking a year back. He fussed about his old haircut in some of the photos, and the ones where he'd still had a bit of acne. He looked awful.

"Fuck," Ashkii sighed, wondering why the whole ordeal was getting to him. He couldn't delete those photos, and besides Giovanni had clearly already seen them. He fiddled with his phone some more, before deciding to click on Giovanni's profile. He didn't remember looking at it too much when they'd exchanged usernames.

The last photo Giovanni uploaded was from today. It had a caption that read "new haircut", and it was him in a similar but shorter style to the one he'd had when Ashkii had dropped him off. Ashkii felt himself swallowing air. Giovanni managed to look even better than he already did hours ago. He knew where the photo had been taken. He remembered the curtains in the bartender's living room and the pale orange wallpaper that coated the walls. Ashkii clicked the comment section and immediately got irritated when he saw the number of people under the post. Everything from emoji heart eyes, hearts, and comments like 'cutie' by various people littered the comment section. He clicked off it, reminding himself not to do that again. If he wanted to keep seeing Giovanni, he had to do things that helped him stay less jealous. And right now, it was to be ignorant to the names and the general number of other men who wanted to or regularly got to sleep with and touch Giovanni.

He kept looking at the account, scrolling through pictures of Giovanni in various hairstyles, groups, and settings. He liked the casual photos that were clearly taken at his apartment the best. The photos with men clinging to him made him slightly jealous and the ones that were a little risqué made his lower stomach twist with want and his face grow warm. He might have stared at the photo with Giovanni at the pool with a speedo for a little too long. The man was dripping wet in the photo and was sitting on the slab with his long skinny legs submerged in water.

Ashkii had zoomed in, contemplated screenshotting it, and quickly discarded the idea when embarrassment started to set in. Giovanni had caught him watching porn already, he didn't need to find a stash of his photos saved somewhere on the younger man's phone. He wouldn't know how to explain himself—he didn't want to explain himself in a situation like that, and besides, he would get to see Giovanni's long legs every day for a while when the man came over to stay with him. The memory of the sudden arrangement he had agreed to was making him nervous and excited at the same time. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to make sure Giovanni had everything he needed. Toiletries, food, entertainment so he didn't get bored... but he decided he would worry about later when Giovanni was sure when he would be moving in temporarily.

Ashkii put his phone away before starting his care. He briefly thought about if he could take Giovanni on a date, but there were two problems. He definitely wasn't making enough to go to any of the places Giovanni was featured in those Instagram photos, and Ashkii wasn't also sure if Giovanni wanted to be seen in public like that with him—on a date. He knew the older man felt uncomfortable about the fact that he was the younger man's first, but there was also the factor that Giovanni was very cautious about giving Ashkii the wrong impression, and Ashkii couldn't deny the fact that going on a date might make him a bit too hopeful. They weren't dating, and they definitely shouldn't act like it.

The younger man pulled out of the parking lot, making his way back home as he tried to comfort himself. He shouldn't be greedy—at least, that's what he tried to rationalize to himself. He got to see Giovanni very often. He got to touch the man intimately. That was all he had wanted—at least what he had thought he had wanted. The idea of Giovanni sleeping with other people upset him so much, but he couldn't do anything about it, no matter how crippling the insecurity that he wasn't enough for Ashkii was getting.

He ignored his thoughts, driving home before heading into his basement apartment. He spent the first hour just eating dinner and settling down. From the time, he knew Ashkii would be working now, serving drinks, and chatting with men that sat at the bar.

Ashkii wanted to text him—call, but he didn't want to come off as clingy. He wanted to give Giovanni breathing space. Ashkii still went to the bar but not as often as he used to, but now, being there meant they had sex or some version of foreplay, and showing up every day might make him look a little greedy. Well, he was, but he didn't want Giovanni to think that, so he stayed at home, watching some YouTube videos, catching up on homework, and doing chores.

It was maybe thirty minutes until it was eleven when Ashkii's phone buzzed, and he got a message from Giovanni.

Message from: Giovanni.

I know what your present is, but I'll have to make sure it's something that's worth getting first but I'm excited.

10:31 PM.

Ashkii sucked his teeth, feeling giddy and happy from the text Giovanni had sent him. He stared at it for a bit, a little dazed before typing up a response.

Message to: Giovanni.

You didn't have to get me a present.

10:32 PM.

Message from: Giovanni.

I definitely did, I had fun picking something out, don't worry about it.

10:32 PM.

Ashkii wanted to know if it was a little pricey. He would hate to feel like Giovanni was spending an arm and a leg on an overdue birthday present he hadn't been expecting, but the last thing he wanted was to come off like he didn't appreciate the effort. He did. It made him so warm he wanted to leave the house and head over to see Giovanni right away.

But he calmed himself.

Message to: Giovanni.

Thank you.

When's your birthday?

10:33 PM.

Ashkii asked this because he wanted to get the bartender something too when the time came, but also he just wanted to know more about Giovanni.

Message from: Giovanni.

It's in July. You have all the time in the world to figure out what to give me so don't sweat it. I'm not hard to shop for.

Also, the next time you're over I'll probably pack a small bag and leave it in your car, just to make sure I can head over to your place as quickly as I can when I need to. Not too sure when exactly my ex is going to be in town, but I will know for sure when he gets here.

10:35 PM.

Ashkii got up from the living room sofa and wandered to his bedroom as he typed a reply to Giovanni.

Message to: Giovanni.

Okay, that's good to know. I'm clearing up some closet space for you. Though, I'm not sure what to get for groceries. I'm not too sure what you like to eat.

10:36 PM.

Message from: Giovanni.

We could always go shopping together. I'll cover groceries when I'm over, don't worry too much about it.

10:36 PM.

Message to: Giovanni.

Oh, okay.

10:36 PM.

Message from: Giovanni.

Can you do me a favor, Ash?

Send me a photo of you smiling.

10:37 PM.

Ashkii felt a ball form in his throat. He wasn't sure why the request made him so nervous. Maybe it was the fact Giovanni had been scrolling through the younger man's Instagram all day? At first, Ashkii started typing up a response to ask why the bartender wanted it, but after thinking about it for a bit. He pressed backspace and instead went over to the part of his room with the best lighting and took a selfie. It wasn't very good. He'd never been great at taking photos, but he made the judgment that it was good enough. He sent the image, and Giovanni saw it right away. He watched the bright italic letters say 'typing' as Giovanni typed up a response.

Message from: Giovanni.

You have a cute smile. It cheers me up, thank you. A customer puked on the counter a while back, and this place still smells like hell. I needed a smile.

10:42 PM.

Ashkii held his breath as he nibbled his lower lip. He wasn't sure how to respond, so he didn't. He walked over to his bed, taking a seat on its edge as the words Giovanni had typed kept ringing in his head.

You have a cute smile.

He hoped the older man had meant it because he was for sure going to be smiling a lot more around him. He also wondered if this meant that he could ask for selfies too. He wasn't going to ask today. He would probably bring it up in person first just to be sure.

Ashkii laid back on the bed, still staring at the screen or his phone.

"What are you doing to me?" he whispered, clicking off his conversation with Giovanni before immediately heading to his Instagram page. He clicked on the Speedo swimming pool picture again and felt his lower half stir.

Fuck.

He was so stupidly obsessed and infatuated with the older man.