CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
yesterday.
season two, episode eighteen.

CASSIE GROANED AS SHE TURNED OVER IN BED, SMILING AT THE PERSON NEXT TO HER. After nearly getting blown up, she figured that life was short, and she should spend it having fun. Or, in her case, having one night stands with a random handful of people from the hospital.

The girl in her bed, who was a nurse on the psych floor, grinned back at her as she got up to get dressed. Cassie almost felt bad for not knowing her name.

"That was fun," the nurse said, zipping up her dress from the night before. "Though, I don't usually do sleepovers."

"Me neither," Cassie shrugged nonchalantly. "But it was late on a Friday night, I didn't want you getting into an accident on your way home."

"That's nice of you," she smiled, finishing tying her shoes and heading towards the door. "Well, uh, I guess I'll see you around?"

Cassie nodded, "Yeah, see you."

Just as the nurse left her room, George entered, raising his brows. "Another one?"

"What?" she asked defensively. "She was cute."

He tilted his head sarcastically. "So am I, but you're not doing me."

"Is this your way of asking me out?" Cassie teased. "And here I thought you were in love with Mer."

"I am—" George replied instantly, before hastily correcting himself, "—not. I am not."

Laughing, Cassie got out of bed and made her way to the bathroom to get ready for yet another eighteen hour shift.

"Whatever you say, Georgie."

☆

Cassie was changing in the locker room, listening to Cristina and Meredith moan about how terrible their love lives are. As she threw on her scrubs, she was reminded just how grateful she was to be single.

"You know, he's acting like I committed a crime," Cristina ranted. "Like my apartment is full of stolen goods. He's acting like I kept my apartment to hide stolen goods, so I could do illegal transplants for money."

"Are you sure he's not just acting like you lied about moving in?" Meredith raised a brow.

Cristina rolled her eyes. "Okay, what's wrong with you?"

"My mommy's a filthy whore."

Cassie glanced between them with an appraising look. "I'm not even going to ask."

☆

"Jake Burton, 15, and has advanced craniodiaphyseal dysplasia," Cassie presented in the patient's room. "Jake was admitted last night after complaining of headaches."

"And he's not a complainer," his mom added.

The patient's dad nodded. "He's been having some nausea as well."

"Jake, can I get you to sit up please?" Derek asked, as he was the attending on the case.

Jake smiled. "Sure."

"Alright, I want you to look right here for me." Derek pointed to Cristina's face, who seemed laughably uncomfortable in the situation.

"You know, if you pretend I'm a lion, it helps," Jake said out of the blue, in reference to the large tumors on his face making his features seem animal like.

"Uh, sorry?"

"If you pretend I'm a lion, instead of a really messed up kid, you get a talking circus animal, which is way easier to look at."

Cassie shared a matching grin with Derek. "Dr. Harper, what's our immediate concern?"

"That the bony tumors are growing inward and encroaching on his brain," she answered. Derek nodded in approval, just as Cristina shared another awkward look with Jake, making Cassie laugh under her breath.

As the group dispersed, Derek jogged up to Cassie, who was a notoriously fast walker.

"You want on this case?"

"Are you kidding?" she scoffed lightheartedly. "Of course I want on this case."

"That's what I thought," he smiled, handing her the chart. "You're okay, right? After everything that happened?"

"I'm fine," she answered, a bit too quickly. "Do you want me to order those labs?"

He sighed. "Yeah, that would great."

Cassie nodded a goodbye, closed the chart, and made her exit.

☆

As Cassie was getting the labs for Jake, an unknown man approached Meredith at the nurses station from behind.

"Invasive non-small with a history of COPD?" he asks, reading over her shoulder. "Guy's pretty much a goner, huh?" 

"Sensitivity, I like that in a stranger," Meredith smirked. "Are you new here?"

"Visting. Confounded by all the rain, and it's only my first day in town." 

"You get used to it."

"Makes me want to stay in bed all day."

Meredith paused, turning to face him incredulously. "We just met, and already, you're talking about bed? Not very subtle."

"Subtle's never been my strong suit," he smirked back, looking her up and down. "So, do you ever go out with coworkers?" 

Meredith smiled at the irony. "I, um, make it a rule not to."

"Then I am so glad that I don't work here."

"Are you hitting on me... in a hospital?"

"Would that be wrong?"

"Meredith," she introduced herself after a moment, reaching out her hand.

Just as he was about to take it in his own, Derek came from out of nowhere, punching him in the face so hard that he fell to the ground.

"Ow," Derek winced, looking at his hand.

"What the hell was that?" Meredith demanded.

"That was Mark."

☆

"Why is he suturing his own face?" Cassie heard George ask as she turned the corner towards the nurses station.

"To turn me on," Cristina guessed.

"Did I hear correctly?" Cassie wondered, totally oblivious. "Did Derek actually punch someone?"

"Yeah," Alex nodded. "Mark Sloan. He's like, the go-to plastic surgeon on the east coast."

"Mark Sloan?" Cassie repeated, shock evident on her features. "Wait, Mark is here? In the hospital? And Derek punched him?"

"You know him?" George and Izzie questioned in unison.

Cassie ignored the question, huffing a laugh at the hilarity of the situation. "God, I can't believe I missed it! Where is he?"

"You know Mark Sloan?" Alex scoffed.

Cassie ignored him, following Cristina's gaze to an exam room, where she saw Meredith watching Mark do his own stitches.

"There's no way. How do you—"

Cassie practically ran over to the door, her smile bigger than it had been in weeks.

Before she could get a word out, Mark noticed her first, a huge grin taking over his face despite the gash on his cheekbone.

"There she is!" he cheered, catching her as she jumped into his arms. Cassie dug her head into his shoulder and wrapped her hands around his torso. "How are you, angel?"

"Better, now that you're here," she grinned.

"Uh," Meredith intervened. "You two know each other?"

Cassie removed herself from Mark's hold and looked through the glass, to see Alex, Izzie, Cristina, and George gaping at her with open mouths.

"She's my best friend," Mark shrugged, throwing his arm around her shoulders before she got the chance to respond.

"I got this, Mer," Cassie said, subconsciously leaning into his warmth. Meredith nodded awkwardly, going back to stand with the rest of the interns. "You'd think she wouldn't be so surprised, since she knows Der's history."

"But really," Mark said lowly, giving her a look that showed he could see through her if she tried to change the subject. "You doing okay?"

"Yeah, why are you asking?"

"Oh, I don't know," he said with an air of indifference. "Maybe because you nearly got yourself killed and neglected to tell me about it?"

Cassie externally winced. "Crap," she groaned. "How did you even find out?"

"Mrs. Shepherd," Mark shrugged. "We still get Sunday brunch together."

Absentmindedly, he handed her the suture kit and allowed her to continue the stitches on his face. From the hall, the interns became even more confused, if possible.

"It's really no biggie," she sighed. "I'm okay. Just a little shaken up, is all. Besides, I'm too busy worrying about Denny, who's gone back to ignoring my calls and sending one word texts to let me know he isn't dead yet."

He couldn't look at her from the angle his head was turned, but Mark could sense the frown on her face. "Still avoiding you, huh? What a dick."

"He's not a dick, he's just hurting. He and my mom were as close as we are, if not more."

"Okay, he's hurting, and he's being a dick in the process. Either way, I don't like him."

Cassie huffed a laugh, shaking her head at him as she finished up the stitches. "Whatever, enough about me. Why are you here?"

"To check up on you, of course," Mark said obviously, smirking at his reflection in the mirror he was holding. Cassie set the suture kit down, moving to stand directly in front of him with a knowing expression which made him sigh. "Also, I may or may not be here to win Addie back because I'm in love with her."

Opening her mouth to respond, Cassie was cut off by an eager looking Alex bursting into the room.

"Meredith said you wanted an x-ray," he said. "I can take you down." Cassie rolled her eyes at his obvious attempt to get on Mark's good side.

"This conversation is not over," she pointed at Mark, before giving him another hug and going back to the girls and George.

"Best friend?" Meredith raised an eyebrow.

"Yep," Cassie nodded, looking down and going back to filling out her patient charts.

"I bet he's amazing in bed," Izzie said absently, dreamily staring into the exam room.

"Trust me, he is."

After a few moments of silence, Cassie glanced up to see everyone staring at her, with wide eyes and open mouths.

"You've slept with him?!" they chorused.

"Of course I've slept with him. He's Mark Sloan. I mean, half of New York has slept with him."

Meredith scoffed, amused. "I can't believe you had sex with with McSexy."

"Only once," Cassie laughed. "Relax."

"McSexy?" Cristina frowned.

"No?"

"McYummy?" Izzie suggested.

"No," Cassie cringed.

"McSteamy."

"Ah, there it is."

"Yep."

"That's fitting."

"Oh, excuse me," George gagged, "I'm just choking back some McVomit."

☆

Later that day, in the CT room with Jake, Cassie was tasked with getting him prepared for his scan. "Okay Jake," she smiled kindly. "It can get a little cramped in there, so you have to try not to move."

"Yeah, uh, this is like my 50th MRI experience," he said, gesturing to his face.

"Right, sorry."

"It's okay," he shrugged. "You have really nice eyes, you know?" Cassie cocked a brow. "I'm just saying, you're mostly all hard core badass, but your eyes aren't. I'm really big on eyes, they're the only part of my face where the tumors aren't growing."

"Yeah, you've got nice eyes," Cassie complimented.

"You do get that I'm jailbait, right?"

Cassie shook her head with a snort. "I gotta say, you're definitely one of my favorite patients."

Jake smiled. "Well don't tell Dr. Shepherd, but you're definitely one of my favorite doctors."

☆

Cassie let out a screech as she was dragged into a dark on call room. Scrambling for the light, she flipped it on to see Addison pacing like a mad woman in front of her.

"God, Addie, you scared me!"

The older woman stopped in her tracks, biting her thumb nail anxiously. "He loves me."

"Mark?" Cassie questioned, earning a feverent nod in response. "Yeah, I know. He told me. Plus, it's like, super obvious."

"You know?" Addison scoffed. "How is it you always know everything?"

"Probably a mixture of being a good listener, having a photographic memory, and not being blind to other's emotions like most people in this hospital."

She sighed. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"That depends," Cassie raised a brow. "Do you love him back?"

"What—  no! Why would you even ask me that?"

"Because it wouldn't be the first time you've hurt Derek if you did, therefore if the answer was yes, I would have to slap you."

"Please don't slap me."

"I won't, as long as you don't love him."

"You're not helping."

Cassie rolled her eyes, leaning against the closed door with her arms crossed over her chest. "What do you want me to say? Just do the right thing."

"I don't know what that is," Addison groaned, rubbing her temples. "I don't want to hurt anyone, not even Mark."

Cassie took a deep breath in annoyance. "Look, Addie. I love you, and I'll always love you, but Meredith is one of my best friends. Derek broke her heart so he could be with you. She's a mess, because he chose you. You screwed her up, just like you screwed Derek up when you cheated on him. I won't tell you what to do, but I'm also not going to let you cheat on Derek again just because you're feeling lonely. So do the right thing. You know what it is."

Addison sighed heavily, sitting on one of the open beds.

"Fine. You didn't have to be rude about it," she grumbled.

Cassie smirked. "Got through to you, though."

Addison attempted to hide a small smile. "Whatever."

"Yeah, whatever."

"God, how is it that you always give the best relationship advice, yet you're always single?" she laughs.

Cassie shrugged. "It's gift."

☆

"So, it's true?" Cassie asked Derek, who was using the computer at a nurses station. "Mark found a way to fix Jake's face?"

Derek didn't look up. "Where did you hear that?"

"Uh," she drawled. "From Mark?"

Rolling his eyes, Derek only spared her a glance before looking away. "It's stupid. And idiotic. And stupid." He huffed loudly. "I mean, I'm already going to be operating on his brain, and he wants to do a risky facial surgery right after? It's ridiculous. And stupid. And idiotic."

Cassie smirked at his outburst. "I'm sorry, are we still talking about surgery, or is this about something else?"

"More like someone else. God, I can't believe he's here."

"Me neither."

"Is that so?"

She nodded genuinely, "Yeah, I had no idea."

Derek kept his gaze fixed on the computer screen as he scoffed. "I find that hard to believe."

Cassie paused, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Shrugging faux nonchalantly, he stood up from his chair and began to collect his things. "Nothing, just that it's no secret that you're still close to him after everything he's done to me."

"What are you talking about?" Cassie questioned, laughing in confusion. "Der, you told me it was okay to forgive him. I asked you forever ago, remember?"

"Yeah," he said, not making eye contact as he walked away. "I remember."

Cassie watched him go, both wondering what his problem was and hoping his sour mood would dissipate before Jake's surgery began.

☆

"Hey Jake," Cassie smiled, meeting the boy at his table in the operating room.

"Dr. Harper, my favorite doctor!" he grinned back.

She shook her head at him in mock disappointment. "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Cassie?"

"Right. Cassie, my favorite doctor."

"That's right, Jake, my favorite patient," she winked, switching out his IV fluids and getting him ready to be put under. "I just wanted to check in on you. How are you feeling, now that your parents approved the surgery?"

Jake sighed nervously. "Good. Anxious. Excited." He took a deep breath, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. "Actually, really excited. I'm finally going to look less like a freak, and more like a human being. Maybe now, girls will actually like me."

Cassie moved so she was standing at his bedside. "I'm really happy for you."

"Yeah, I'm happy too," he laughed.

"But, just for the record," Cassie whispered, leaning in so only he could hear her, "if the girls don't like you for who you are, tumors and all, then they don't deserve you."

"Thanks, Cassie," Jake grinned. "You know, all I've ever wanted was to be normal. And now, I finally get to live a normal life, looking like a normal person."

"Ready to go?" Mark clapped, waltzing in after a very irritated Derek.

"Ready," Jake nodded, looking up at Cassie. "See you on the other side?"

"Yeah," she smiled at him. "See you."

☆

"Is it harder to get through the bony tumors?" Alex asked Derek as he operated, while Cassie assisted and Mark waited for his turn in the surgery.

Alex was allowed to scrub in, but Cassie got to actually do something, which she rubbed in his face with a slight raise of her eyebrow.

Derek nodded. "It's a little more dense. Hang another unit of blood."

"I've got it," Cassie said, just as the machines started to go off. "Derek, we're losing him."

"Son of a bitch. Give me the sponge. Put it in the pressure infuser. Somebody hang another unit of blood please."

"No carotid," Cassie sighed, checking Jake's pulse with her clean hand.

"Start CPR and bag him."

"Paddles, get me the paddles."

"He's losing a lot of blood, someone get FFP. Quickly!"

"Charge to 200," Cassie called out.

"Charging," Alex shouted.

"Clear!" Cassie shocked him, with no change.

Come on, Jake, she thought desperately, shocking him again. Live. Please, just live.

After the machines flatlined for the third time, Derek and Alex stepped away from the table.

"He's gone," Derek sighed. Cassie didn't listen.

Alex tilted his head. "Cass, it's too late."

She ignored him, calling out once again, "Charge the paddles!" No one moved. "Why isn't anyone charging?"

Mark stepped forward, gently resting a hand on her arm. "It's over, angel," he whispered into her ear, as she was still adamantly performing CPR. "It's over. Come on."

Slowly she stopped pushing and stepped away from the table, her eyes glassy as she ripped off her gloves and left the OR.

☆

Cassie massaged the back of her neck as she exited the locker room and headed towards the elevators, where she ran into Mark, who had changed back into his street clothes.

"Hey," he said, pulling her into a side hug. "You okay? I know you cared about that patient."

"I'm fine," she said halfheartedly, "I don't really want to talk about it."

Before Mark could respond, the elevator doors opened. Derek and Addison stood in the center, the former rolling his eyes at their faces.

"Hey man, don't beat yourself up—" Mark started, before Derek pushed past him and out of the small space.

"I'm gonna take the stairs."

"Derek," Cassie sighed sympathetically.

"Oh, come on. How come you can forgive her but not me?" Mark wondered.

Derek looked between him and Addison. "I didn't forgive her. And with you, I have no obligation to try."

Cassie gave him a look, "Derek—"

"And you," he scoffed, raising his voice slightly, "how can you be so friendly with him, after everything? I thought you were better than that, Cassandra."

"Watch it," Mark instantly snapped, switching from apologetic to defensive in an instant. "You say whatever you want to me, but don't speak to Cass that way. She didn't do anything wrong, and you know it."

Derek rolled his eyes once again, leaving without another word as the elevator doors closed.

After a moment, Mark leaned over towards Addison, as Cassie stepped away to give them some privacy. Not that it mattered, because they'd both tell her anyways, but just to be polite.

"Your marriage is over, Addison. All you have to do is admit it. Then you can come back home with me. I'm going to the bar across the street. Meet me there."

Mark left, leaving Addison breathless.

"Do the right thing, Addie," Cassie reminded her, picking up her pace to follow after Mark.

☆

"Double scotch, single malt," Mark ordered at the bar, before a figure to his left caught his eye. "Actually, make that two. Thanks Joe."

"Thanks Joe," Cassie echoed, smiling at the familiar bartender.

The duo sat in comfortable silence for a few moments.

"I'm not naive for thinking Addison will show up, am I?" he wondered.

Cassie turned to face him. "You're really still in love with her?"

"Yeah," Mark said, before adding as an afterthought, "Well, I think. I'm not sure I even know what real love feels like."

Cassie huffed a laugh. "I understand, trust me."

"You never answered my question."

"No."

"No?"

"She won't show," she said sadly. "She's doing the right thing, Mark." He looked down upset. "I'm sorry. I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better."

Mark looked at her. "You mean that?"

"Of course, anything."

"Anything, anything?"

Cassie grinned humorously. "Even hide a body, if you need it. What's up?"

"Well, there is one thing that always makes me feel better."

"What—" Cassie started to ask, before seeing the smirk pulling at his lips. "Oh my god, I hate you."

"You love me."

"I am so not sleeping with you."

"Again."

"Right. I am not sleeping with you again."

"You did say anything," he jokingly shrugged. Cassie raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"It's not like I just sleep around—"

"Hey!" a voice interrupted their conversation. Cassie swiveled around, to see the same girl that left her bed earlier that morning.

"Hi, uh—"

"Vanessa," she grinned.

"Right, Vanessa. Everything okay?"

Mark looked between them, his eyes narrowed.

"Oh yeah, I'm great," Vanessa waved her off. "But, I accidentally grabbed this on my way out this morning, and didn't realize it wasn't mine until I got home. Anyways, I figured I'd find you here to return it."

Cassie blushed slightly when Vanessa shamelessly handed her one of her favorite black lace bras.

"Oh, uh, thanks for giving it back," she accepted it, hastily throwing it in her bag as Vanessa waved goodbye. "See you around."

Cassie turned back around to face Mark, who gave her a deadpan look as he finished his drink.

"You don't sleep around, you said?"

Cassie laughed loudly, "Oh, fuck off."

He smiled cheekily. "I don't blame you, she was cute."

"That's what I said!"

They stayed at the bar for about an hour, catching up and enjoying one of the first free nights for both of them in while.

After thinking for a long moment, Cassie looked Mark up and down. She finished her drink, standing up and throwing her coat over her shoulder.

He glanced up at her in question. "Cass?"

Cassie smirked down at him, holding a hand out for him to grab. "You coming, or what?"

author's note —
ALRIGHT, EVERYBODY
STAY CALM!!!! STAY
FUCKING CALM!!!!!!!!!!
IT'S HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!

also not that it matters
because we'll never see her
again, but i pictured vanessa
to look like zendaya. idk she
just gives me the vibes lol