NOVA
======
1987

"It's time for 'ya to sleep, kiddo." Dad grins as he puts his pistol back into it's case, amused by my irritated expression.

"Don't look at me like that, Novie. You're still a kid at the end of the day," he chuckles, I let out an exaggerated huff.

"Most kids don't lean how to use guns," I mumble, pouting my lips and folding my arms.

He stands up and sighs.

"It's all for your own benefit, kiddo. I know most girls your age have Barbie dolls, but how is a doll going to protect 'ya?" He tilts his head, scruffing the top of my hair.

I yank my head away from him dramatically, he groans for a moment before smirking.

"Alright honey, how about this. What's your favourite gun that I've let 'ya use?" He asks, leaning down to my height with his hands on his knees.

I instantly point to the case of the old pistol.

"That one," I murmur through my pout.

"That old thing, really?" He snickers, I nod.

"Okay, well when you're old enough, I'll let 'ya have that Smith and Wesson. 'Sound like a deal?" He grins.

Despite my efforts to remain serious, I can't help but giggle excitedly at the thought of this new 'toy'. He laughs and extends his hand to the back of my shoulder before leading me towards my bedroom.

"That's my girl. Tomorrow mornin', once you've fed the chickens, I'm going to teach you all 'bout some good techniques to kick ass when you don't have a gun. Does that sound good, kiddo?"

"Yeah, that sounds good Daddy." I smile, climbing into bed.

"Alright sugar, I'll be in my room if 'ya need me in the night." He says softly, leaning down and kissing me on my forehead before walking towards the doorway and resting his hand on the light switch.

"Daddy?" I say quietly before he leaves, he hums.

"Do you think Mommy will ever come back?"

He glances away and into the hall with a small sigh, "I'm sure one day, honey. When she does, she'll be damn pissed if I didn't make 'ya go to bed on time though!" He forces a chuckle.

I nod slightly before pulling the covers over my head, bringing the nearest teddy towards me and wrapping it into an embrace.

"Sweet dreams, kiddo." He flicks off the switch and closes the wooden door with a creak.

================
?/02/2003
Panay, The Philippines
================

I feel something masked right over my mouth and nose, and it damn stinks of melting plastic. I attempt to open my eyes, but it feels like they've been glued shut for an eternity. I feel so fucking heavy, as though every single fibre of my being is restrained.

This isn't my bedroom, I'm so confused.

"Nova? Nova?" A voice is echoing from somewhere.

I try to reply, but my words just come out as a deep, incoherent groan. With immense effort, I manage to shift my finger slightly; something warm wraps around my hand.

"Can you hear us?"

"Yeah," I'm able to force out a single word, muffled by something. Whatever is covering my face is removed as I take in a long breath, sterile scents burning my nostrils. An ache lingers in the right side of my chest, intensifying as I inhale.

Finally, I regain more control over my movements; squeezing my eyes slightly before blinking them open. Whatever is holding my hand yanks away immediately.

I'm instantly fucking blinded by a harsh light gleaming down, causing me to squint. Somebody yells something and the light dims, allowing me to open up my eyes fully again.

My vision is foggy, but I can tell that I'm in a hospital bed. I feel as though I'm crawling my way back up from the pits of hell, every damn inch I move drains an immense amount of energy from me.

"Can you look at me?" A familiar deep voice rasps.

At an excruciatingly slow pace, I turn my head on the pillow to look leftwards, following the sound.

Everything hits me like a ton of damn bricks as soon as I see his face, all the memories of what happened dominating my brain and kicking me right back down into those fiery pits.

"Leo," I mumble, trying to adjust to my surroundings as my mind runs wild.

Just earlier, I got stabbed by my brother. Nicholas is Las. Nicholas also apparently fucking killed Mom.

"How are you feeling?" He asks in a hushed tone, scooting his chair closer to the edge of the bed.

"Shit," I groan with a cough, turning to look the other way and at the array of wires I'm hooked up to. Rosa is fiddling with them.

"I'm not surprised, you got a real bad injury," he sighs.

My gaze moves down towards my chest, a large patch covering the right side where I can feel the lingering ache.

I look back at Leo, some confusion rushing through me the more aware I become. The fresh cuts he had around his face are already completely healed over.

"How long have I been out?" I ask hesitantly, trying to sit myself up a little.

"Don't try to sit up yet, you've only just goddamn woke up," he grunts, completely avoiding my question as he reaches forward and leans me back down with a gentle push.

"How long?" I repeat, seriousness in my hoarse voice.

He stays quiet for a moment before grumbling, "about nine days."

Nine fucking days? When I think about the events, they feel as though they were only a blink ago. I sigh and lean my head back against the pillow. "Did you get Nicholas?"

That's my main concern right now, and this silence isn't very promising.

"Nova, come on. Just try to rest, alright?" He murmurs, once again ignoring my question.

"Did you get him?"

He looks away and at Rosa before turning his head back to me slowly. "No, we didn't."

The emotions rip through me like an electric shock. If I could've died so it meant they could go and kill Nicholas, I'd have been happy with that.

"You promised me you'd get him," I hiss, the ache searing into my chest.

"No I didn't, Nova. I promised that you would get him once you're recovered-"

"He could've already been dead if you'd just gone after him!" I seethe, he jolts his head backwards.

"Are you being fucking serious? You seriously thought I was going to leave you to die just to go after that bastard?" Leo scoffs, shaking his head.

"That's what I asked of you, he's dangerous." I mumble.

"I had bigger concerns. You must be some sort damn fool if you really thought I'd leave you to die, Shields." He sighs.

"Well-"

"You really would've died just so he could die too? Can't you see that your life has more value than that? Than his?" He interrupts, glaring at me with raised eyebrows.

I grit my teeth. I shouldn't take my anger out on him, but the temptation is there. He was the one person who had the opportunity to chase the bastard down.

"I just wish you'd gone after him," I murmur.

"Well, I didn't. Because quite frankly? I'd rather have you alive and Nicholas on the run, than have you dead." He spits.

I don't reply, I just close my eyes.

"Are you tired?" He asks.

"No, just thinking." I whisper under my breath.

"About what?"

"What do you think?" I open my eyes, furrowing a brow in frustration. "Maybe about the fact that the psychotic executor is in fact my brother, and maybe about the fact he murdered my Mom? Could you even write this?"

Rosa seems to grow stressed as I start venting.

"Nova, please calm down. You can't afford to put stress on yourself this early into you waking up. Your body still needs time to adjust, you're still weak." She lays a hand on my shoulder, Leo nods in agreement with her as I look away with a frown.

"What happened with the hostages?" I ask after a minute.

"We're arranging transportation back to the US, they've been given an area of the barracks for now." Leo says.

I raise my eyebrows, "when are we going back to the States?"

"As soon as possible, really." A different voice calls out as somebody new enters the room, pacing over to my bed.

"How are you feeling, Shields?" North asks, pulling up a chair next to Leo's.

"Incapacitated," I huff before backtracking, "we're leaving the Philippines as soon as possible?" I shift myself up a little, successfully this time.

"Well, we ain't got a damn reason to stay here anymore. Our operation was successful, we rescued the hostages-" North explains until I interrupt.

"-No. It wasn't successful because he's still alive, I'm not leaving until we track him down."

"Nova, you're going to be out of combat action for a while. You can't just wait here for another three goddamn weeks." Leo hisses.

"If you'd just gone after him, we wouldn't be in this fucking position!" My voice cracks.

He suddenly snarls and stands up, shoving his chair backwards with a screech.

"You know what? If you're just going to lay there and fucking moan at me for getting you out of there alive, I'm not going to listen to you for another damn second." He snaps, turning and striding out of the room with a discreet limp before I can answer.

My mouth gapes open for a second before I shut it slowly, looking over at North.

"You shouldn't blame him, Shields." He sighs after a silence.

"I don't blame him, he just had the perfect opportunity and didn't take it." I mumble, picking my nails.

"I'm with Hendrix on this one. Your life is worth a lot more than his," He says, voice significantly smoother than normal as he continues.

"I can't imagine how much this is for you to take in. I do feel for you, Shields. Although, that doesn't mean you can just go swinging your gun around." He narrows his eyes.

"But-"

"-We will get him, there's no doubt there. Think of all of the damn people we've tracked down over the years. Plus, we've got Abe on our side now." He interrupts, reassuring me.

I look down at my hands, the shame settling in over how I snapped at Leo.

"Alright," I murmur.

"Everybody has been asking about you, Tara especially, but the medics only really wanted one person by your bedside at a time so she hasn't had much of a chance to come by. I'll go and let her know that you're awake," he grumbles, standing up from his own chair and pacing towards the door.

I glance at Rosa, who is wrapping a blood pressure monitor around my arm.

"What does he mean by that?" I tilt my head against the pillow.

"Hm? The one person rule? It's just because of all the equipment-"

"-No, not that. Why has nobody else been able to come and see me?" I interrupt quietly as she fastens the monitor.

"Because Leo was here," she says softly after a moment, analysing the screen.

"All week?" I raise my eyebrows in surprise, she nods.

"Pretty much, he's been watching like a hawk. I know you've both had some severe differences, but if I didn't know any better, I'd think there was something happening between you." She says quietly.

"What makes you think that?" I ask, well aware that she might be perfectly fucking right. What that 'something' is? I don't know, but she mightn't be wrong, as much as I hate to admit it.

She furrows her eyebrows slightly. "Nova, you're a very smart woman. I really don't think you have the capability to be so oblivious about this," she chuckles.

"I-"

"Novie!"

I'm interrupted as Tara comes flying into the room at fucking Godspeed, slamming the door shut and skidding to a stop right next to my bed before grabbing my hand.

"Hey Tarantino. How are you holding up?" I grin crookedly as she practically hugs my hand.

"Better now that I know you're awake. Everybody's been so worried about you," she sighs, shaking her head.

"No need to worry anymore, I'm absolutely fine." I snicker, stopping as that ache returns in my chest.

"You weren't fine. It was so bad, Nova. Really bad." She says under her breath.

"Yeah, getting stabbed in the chest by my brother wasn't the most rejuvenating experience," I mumble.

Tara opens her mouth, but Rosa shakes her head at her frantically, causing her to snap it back shut. What aren't they telling me?

"What is it?" I quirk an eyebrow.

"Oh, nothing." Tara looks away, a guilty look on her face.

"It obviously is something, tell me." I demand.

Rosa and Tara share a look of uncertainty before Rosa sighs and clears her throat, nodding.

"You lost a whole lot of blood, Nova. Losing that much blood in a short space of time sent you into cardiac arrest." She says hesitantly, glancing down at her feet.

Jesus Christ, I have a damn knack for near death experiences.

"How-"

"-Defibrillators and CPR, as well as a blood transfusion." Rosa reads my fucking mind, answering the question before it's even escaped my mouth.

"Blood transfusion? I'm AB negative, one of the rarer types. I didn't realise anybody else here would be able to donate." I raise my eyebrows in surprise.

"You're right, nobody else does have that type. There's also no B negatives or A negatives, but luckily we have an O negative." She smiles slightly, looking at Tara. I follow her gaze.

"It was Leo, Novie. He's O negative. The second he found out you needed a transfusion, he didn't hesitate to volunteer himself, even before we found out what blood type you have." Tara says quietly after a moment, a small smile forming on her own lips.

I guess Leo Hendrix has a damn knack for saving my ass.

"Shit, now I feel really bad," I groan, Tara tilts her head.

"Why?" She asks.

"Because I was a damn bitch to him when I woke up, pissed that he didn't go after Nicholas. I shouldn't have taken my frustration out on him," I murmur.

Tara shrugs slightly, "I mean, you did just wake up from a small coma. I doubt he will have taken much offence."

"Hopefully not, I should apologise." I sigh.

"I think you just need to focus on building up your strength again first, Nova. Do you feel as though you can sit up properly?" Rosa interjects, moving towards my side.

Can I? I don't know. I still feel insanely heavy, ridiculously tired. I fucking hate feeling like this, like a damn weakling.

"Sure," I nod, even though I'm far from sure. They both move towards me and hook an arm each under my shoulders, assisting as I slowly push myself into a seat, hanging my legs off the edge of the bed.

"You're doing great, how do you feel?" Rosa asks in a motherly tone.

"I feel fine," I lie. She looks suspiciously at the heart rate monitor, taking notice that it slowed down slightly before returning back to normal pace.

"Just try and take a few deep breaths, how's the pain?" She keeps one of her arms hooked under mine for support.

"It's just an ache, feels like cramp. It's not awful," I shrug.

And I'm not lying this time, I thought the pain would be a whole damn lot worse than it is. Then again, I guess it's had over a week to settle.

"Good, do you think you can walk with our support? I know this is all very sudden, but the sooner we get you moving, the faster your recovery will be." She tilts her head, I nod.

"Yeah, probably." I mumble. Simultaneously, they both help to hoist me to my feet as Rosa unhooks the wires attaching me to the machines.

And thank the fucking Lord above they've got hold of me, because I feel as though my legs are made out of jelly the second my soles meet the floor. My knees instantly buckle as I find my footing, slowly regaining the sensation of my movements.

An inch at a time after I regain my balance, they start to pace forwards with me. They're practically dragging me for a few steps until I manage to use my own feet at an excruciatingly slow pace.

I fucking hate this, having to rely on them for help.

The suffocating thoughts about my Mom and Nicholas haven't left my mind for a second.

We do a half lap around the room until the door swings open, the sudden noise almost sending my legs buckling again.

"What the fuck is she doing out of bed?" Leo seethes, pacing over to us with best effort and a serious expression.

"We need to get her moving," Rosa sighs.

"I can't just lie in the damn bed, Leo." I mumble.

"You've only just goddamn woken up!" He hisses, throwing his hands in the air and shaking his head in disapproval.

"Oh, I forgot you were actually a medic." I murmur sarcastically, he scoffs.

"She should be resting, not doing fucking laps." He folds his arms and glares at Rosa, annoyance creasing into his forehead.

"I've been resting for a week."

"Being in a fucking coma doesn't count as resting, Nova!" He snaps, cold gaze shooting back towards me.

"Leo, you really need to calm down. Stressing her out isn't healthy." Rosa warns.

Everybody is talking as though I'm a fucking child.

"If I didn't think I could walk, I wouldn't. Stop it." I hiss.

I don't think now is the best time to apologise about my earlier attitude.

He growls something incoherent, taking a deep breath and running a bandaged hand down his tired face.

"Just keep me updated on her," he grumbles as though I'm not even here, spinning on his heels and striding right back towards the door, closing it behind him with a thud.

Tara raises her eyebrows at me as he exits, "have you finally started see what I've been saying all this time? About something deeper going on?" She tilts her head.

I remain silent for a moment, pondering and staring at the door whilst also concentrating on my footing.

"Of course I have, Tarantino."