NOVA
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14/01/2003
Panay, The Philippines

I grimace in frustration as I lean against the washbasin, looking into the mirror at the steri-strips binding the skin over the gash across my nose bridge.

Do people seriously think I'm capable of this? Of betraying the group I've poured every ounce of my fucking soul in for the past seven years?

Do I really come across that dissimilar to my heartless, scum of the earth brother?

"I can't believe he did that to you." Tara murmurs, shaking her head in disgust of the whole situation.

"For once, me neither." I shrug, glancing over at her. Word has spread around the base like wildfire over the palaver. I wipe some dried blood off of the sides of my nose with an old rag, heaving out a heavy sigh.

"Do I come across like that, Tara? Like I have the potential to betray the group?" I mumble, dampening the cloth with some more water.

"Not at all. I don't know what the hell got into him." She seethes on my behalf, although her reply makes me feel a little more relieved. I groan slightly, propping myself up and sitting on the counter.

"How's the nose?" She speaks in a soft tone of voice. I just shrug with a small grin tugging at the corners of my lips.

"I've had a shard of metal yanked from my leg with nothing to numb the pain, this is a walk in the park." I chuckle, although the movement of my smile does make my nose ache a little more. My face morphs into a look of concern as I gaze at the blinding lights lining the ceiling.

"Doesn't stop the fact that there is a traitor amongst us, unfortunately. That's what I've been trying to get out of Abe all week." I sigh, Tara's head immediately swivelling back over at me.

"Abe?"

"Yeah, that's his name apparently, 'managed to weed that out of him at least. God knows if it's his actual name, but it's something easier to know him by."

She nods slowly. "I mean, even if you've only managed to get his name so far, it's a good start right?" She smiles at me reassuringly, earning one back from me.

"Yeah, suppose so. My Dad always told me that the best way to get information out of someone is to play as though you're on a mutual side, he learnt that from Vietnam. I'm not a natural manipulator, but I'm trying my best to play Officer Friendly." I say with a small grin, Tara chuckling slightly before raising her eyebrows.

"Your Dad fought in Vietnam?"

"Yep. Lost his leg after a little while so got sent home. He met the 'piece of shit's' Mom out there, she was actually Filipino." I explain, Tara nods along slowly as she listens intently.

"Oh really? That's interesting, I-"

We're rudely interrupted as somebody clears their throat from within the doorway. I glimpse away from Tara and into that direction.

Right now, I'm really fucking pissed that the washrooms are unisex.

"Nova, can I talk to you?"

I gaze at him with a completely unimpressed expression, looking back at Tara who is giving me an uncertain glance. After a few seconds of hesitancy, I nod slightly. Tara makes her way out of the bathroom, scoffing at Leo as she barges past him; closing the door behind her.

We're both locked in a completely tense silence.

"Well? You're the one who wanted to talk, and yet you're standing there like a fucking mute." I hiss to him as he sighs.

"I'm silent because I don't know what to say." He mumbles, looking down at the floor. I don't think I've ever witnessed him look more defeated than he does right now.

"Maybe 'sorry for bashing in your nose for no apparent reason' would be a good start?" I seethe sarcastically, leaning back against the mirror.

"Of course I'm fucking sorry, Nova. I feel terrible." He mutters, not even able to look me in the eyes.

"Oh you feel terrible? You feel fucking terrible? At least you didn't get fucking accused of betrayal." I spark back at him, feeling my blood starting to simmer. He just retreats back into silence.

"Come the fuck over here, stop acting like a deer in the headlights. Look me in the eyes and tell me you're sorry instead of staring at your fucking feet." I speak in the most commanding tone I can muster up, jumping down from the washbasin and pointing my finger at the floor.

To my utter surprise, he doesn't hesitate for a second as he paces over. Standing directly in front of me.

Now I'm the one struggling to maintain eye contact as he stares at me. It feels as though he's looking right down into my soul.

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry, Nova. I made a huge mistake." He says more confidently this time instead of being a mumbling fool.

"Why the fuck would you think it was me? I told you everything, Leo. I spilled all about my fucking trauma, mistake or not. You acted as though I'm just like my brother. Is that really what you think of me? That deep down I'm a heartless, cynical bitch?"

"No," he quickly interjects as soon as I finish my sentence. "You're nothing like that. Nothing like what you've told me about him. I was a fucking idiot for thinking you were capable of anything like that."

"Yeah, you were. Everything I have ever done, everything I have ever fought against has been because I want to rid the earth of the scum like him." I mumble, glancing away from him now.

"I'm so sorry." He says for what feels like the 50th fucking time. Then again, there's not much more he can actually say. I take a deep breath, heaving it out.

"It's fine, I'll get over it. You can go now." I murmur, but he shakes his head.

"It's not fucking fine, Nova." He says quickly, grabbing the rag that was discarded to the side and running it under some water. Doesn't look much like he's leaving.

And all the air is practically sucked out of my lungs as he crouches slightly, links his hands under my thighs, and lifts me up. Sitting me back onto the washbasin.

My natural instinct was to wrap an arm around the back of his shoulders so I didn't go tipping backwards. So now we're positioned awkwardly. My arm around his neck. His hands under my thighs.

We're dangerously close. Leos eyes widen a little. And I hate that I can't help it, but I feel my cheeks heat. Burn. I quickly drop my hand back to the edge of the washbasin.

"You've still got blood around your nose." He says softly after a few seconds, releasing his hold under my thighs and wringing the rag of excess water.

"I mean, you did nearly knock my lights out." I sigh, glancing away and rolling my eyes; until he gently places his thumb and index finger under my chin, guiding my vision back to face him.

I meet his tired whiskey-eyes, his thumb accidentally brushes my lower lip, and my breath halts for a split second. Damn, I'm seriously starved of any physical contact that isn't do to with conflict.

"Just let me help a little, okay? It's the least I can do." He sighs, poising the rag a few inches away from my face.

Surprisingly, I don't protest.

As though he's handling an a treasured piece of porcelain, he presses the rag on the side of my nose; wiping it gently against the dried remnants of blood. I just sit as still as possible, eyes wandering off in some other direction instead of having to stare right at his fucking face.

This is going on for a whole lot longer than I planned. I'd wiped most of the blood off in the first place, there can't have been that much left. He mumbles something entirely incoherent.

"What did you say?" I ask.

"Nothing." He mutters, finally finishing his little cleaning session. He removes the rag away from my face, yet not his gaze.

I don't bother to question what he said. I don't really care that much.

Do I?

"You can't even look at me." He sighs.

"I mean, your face isn't exactly what I want to be staring at right now." I quip back at him, earning a small chuckle.

"I can't even blame you," he replies, taking a few steps back before turning away, "I hope you don't think I'm a monster, Nova." He says over his shoulder.

"I don't. You're just really fucking annoying." I spark back. I spot his lips curling up slightly as he eventually turns and continues striding away, leaving the washroom.

What in the actual fuck was that?