LEO
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29/04/2003
Alto, New Mexico
Silverwing Base
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I can't bite down the prideful grin as she slowly edges towards the washroom. Her legs haven't stopped shaking for a damn second.

"Having some trouble?" I snicker.

"It's your fault," she spits, shooting me an amused glare over her shoulder before disappearing inside.

I fall back onto her bed with a satisfied sigh. I think this has honestly been the best goddamn night of my life, and it was not the direction I thought it'd take.

The image of her on top of me will never leave my mind.

I hear the chain flush, faucet turning off before she re-emerges again.

"You've really made your mark," she chuckles, gesturing to the love-bites littered across her neck and chest.

"Couldn't help myself," I smile, patting the bed and gesturing for her to lay back down. Her legs are still wobbly as she makes her way over, but not as severely as before.

"That was the best thirty minutes of my life," she whispers, wrapping an arm around me and laying her head on my chest.

"It was the most unexpected thirty minutes of mine," I snicker, running a hand up and down her back.

"Why was it unexpected?" She raises her head.

"Because I thought you were just going to tell me to fuck off, to be honest. Not let me fuck you," I grin as she bites her lip.

"I've wanted that for a long time," she says quietly.

"I've wanted you for a long time, Nov," I sigh, leaning my head back against the pillow.

There's one thing that's chipping away at my mind. I've told her that I'm in love with her, but she hasn't mentioned anything.

"So, where do we stand after this?" She tilts her head.

"I mean, I want to be with you. Of course I want to be with you, but North said it isn't allowed-"

"-North knows?!" She interrupts, eyes widening.

"He figured it out, read me like a damn open book. I went insane when I found out that the bastard had gotten into the States, begged him to let me come here so I could be with you. He said no at first, but surprisingly changed his mind," I shrug.

"You begged him to let you come here, hm? Why's that?" She grins provokingly.

"Because I really fucking missed you, and," I sigh, "I wanted to be around to protect you, Nov."

"You know that-"

"-don't you dare start with the whole 'wooh, I can protect myself because I'm so tough' bullshit. I know you can, but I want to protect you regardless," I interrupt, placing a finger over her lips.

"It goes both ways," she beams and turns as I remove my finger, rolling over to check the time on her clock.

"I take it you're staying in my cabin?" She snickers.

"Yes I am,"

"I didn't say you could," she bites a smirk.

"You didn't have to, I already know the answer," I sigh, combing my fingers through her hair.

"You've just got me all figured out, haven't you Hendrix?"

Not at all.

"No, you're actually the most confusing damn woman I've ever met," I groan, listening to her laugh that sounds like music to my ears.

"I used to say the same thing about you,"

"What, that I'm a 'confusing woman'?" I grin.

"You know what I mean, you prick," she slaps my arm.

My God, I'm so fucking in love with her.

It's terrifying.

I gently smooth my hand across her chest, halting when I reach the scarred skin on the left side of her sternum. The scar from the stab wound.

It's healed much better than I thought it would've. The skin is raised slightly, still with a purple tinge to it in contrast to her tanned complexion. She notices my gaze and quickly goes to cover it.

"It's disgusting, don't look at it," she mumbles.

"Nova, you're fucking gorgeous, a scar isn't going to change that. Besides, look at the amount of damn scars I've got," I grin, leaning back and running my hand down my own chest.

And I'm not lying, I've got scars absolutely everywhere.

"Do you remember where you got them all?" She tilts her head, I shake mine.

"No idea for most. This one," I gesture to a scar on my abdomen, "that was a stab I got on my final mission with Carlos Richards, the one he was killed on. Wasn't too deep,"

"That seems like so long ago now," she whispers, carefully tracing a finger across my own scar and uncovering her own.

"It's almost been a year, 'was the 8th of May. That's the only scar I vividly remember getting. I was devastated when Richards was killed, but if he hadn't have been-"

"-then we wouldn't have been here right now," she finishes my sentence.

"Well yeah, exactly," I hum, checking for approval to look closer at the scar on her chest. She hesitates for a moment before nodding.

"Can you feel it?" I ask softly, passing a fingertip over it.

"Not really, the sensation hasn't come back completely,"

Memories of that day come flooding back into my mind. Being absolutely drenched in her blood, the way it was spilling out between my hands as I tried to stem the bleeding.

"I really thought I was going to lose you that day," I murmur.

"And I was convinced I was going to die, I didn't vision myself surviving at all after the amount of blood loss," she sighs.

"It was the worst thing I've ever seen. I was fucking terrified, Nova. When you lost consciousness, I couldn't bring myself to check your pulse in case-" I hesitate.

I read her facial expression, seeing if she's uncomfortable. She doesn't seem it, she's just listening intently.

"-in case there wasn't a pulse," I finally push the rest of my words out.

"It was so strange, it was just as though I'd blinked. I had no idea how much time had passed," she gazes at the ceiling in thought.

"It was the longest nine days of my life," I mumble.

"And it was the quickest nine days of mine," she chuckles, raking a hand through my hair.

"The way you killed Jed just as he was about to kill me, I couldn't believe my damn luck. One minute you were out cold and the next minute, Jed's brains were all over me,"

"I really did wake up in the nick of time, I don't think I've ever snapped out of a concussion sooner," she grins.

My gaze travels down to her thigh. The scar there is significantly wider, not as clean cut.

"And that's from the shard of metal on the Ramirez mission," I tilt my head.

I've seen it before, many times before. She usually wears shorts when it's warm, so I saw it a lot in the Philippines.

I've also had my face right between her thighs a few times, so it's hard to miss.

"That was around the time you wanted me dead," she grins, I roll my eyes.

"Maybe," I snicker, giving her arm a squeeze, "I know I asked you about 'Nova', but why have I heard you getting called 'Novella'?" I tilt my head.

"You mean, why did Nicholas call me Novella that day, right?"

"Well, yeah," I say sheepishly, diverting my gaze.

"My middle name is Eleanor. So Nova Eleanor, Nova Ella, Novella," she shrugs, "that's how I knew it was him instantly. Nobody else would call me that apart from my Dad, and it definitely wasn't him," she snickers.

"I mean, if he'd been your Dad I think that would've been much worse," I shake my head, climbing off of the bed and heading towards the washroom.

I click the door shut behind me, turning my back to the mirror and glancing over my shoulders.

And she said I made a mark?

Her nails almost took the first damn layer off of my skin. I snicker to myself, leaning down to splash my face with ice water.

Something catches my eye in the mirror, sitting on a shelf behind me. A familiar, small orange pot with a white screw top lid.

I dry my face, turning around as I take a step closer. There's another pot stacked behind it.

It might just be her birth control, but there's something telling me it's not. I lean in, eyes scanning over one of the labels.

'Venlafaxine'

What the fuck is a Venlafaxine?

"I swear to God if you're taking a shit in my washroom, I'll shoot you," I hear her yell from outside.

"Well, I guess I'm getting shot in that case," I tease, picking up on her groan.

It's probably nothing, I just brush it off for now as I reopen the door. She's curled up in her bed, comforter coiled right around her.

"You look so sweet when you're like that," I snicker. She raises her head, narrowing her eyes.

"Don't call me sweet,"

"Already did," I grin, pacing over as she lifts the covers to let me slide under. I hook my arms around her, curving her back into my chest.

My lips connect with the small constellation tattoo on the nape of her neck, peppering kisses over it.

We lay in the comfort of our silence. All I can hear is her steady, deep breaths. The way her chest rises and falls ever so slightly.

"I wish I could just be with you without any consequences," I whisper under my breath, hearing no reply.

"Nov?"

Nothing. I prop myself up slightly, looking at her face.

She's fast asleep.

I press my lips against the back of her hair before drifting off myself.

—

I heave out a groan, instantly trying to squeeze her closer to me as the daylight seeps into her cabin.

I'm met with nothing but air and a part of the comforter. I immediately shoot up, obviously forgetting that we're in base as I worry about if something has happened to her. 

She probably just went to get fucking breakfast. 

I clench my arms, stretching them over my head as I glance around the room. My eyes land on a small note on her bed-stand. I have to do a double take, checking it actually does have my name on it.

It does. There's no hesitation as I swipe it up into my possession, unfolding it.

It's only a few words long, but those few words have a heavy weight of meaning.

'I went to get some food,
didn't want to wake you up :)
ps. I love you too <3
I guess we both have trouble
admitting it out loud.
~Nov.'

I'm grinning like the cat who ate the goddamn canary, as though I'm in fucking high school. There's not a chance in hell this note won't be within a 5 foot radius of me at all times.

She actually loves me back. All my paranoia from last night is erased immediately.

I reach for my shirt, that had been on the floor after last night. Nova must have straightened it for me, since it's now neatly folded at the bottom of the bed.

She's cute when she wants to be.

Right on cue, my stomach starts growling. 'Means I've got an excuse to just 'bump into' my girl.

Not that she's actually my girl, yet. If we weren't tied down to Fleetwood, we would be able to just live a normal life. We could do the usual couple shit. I could take her on dates, spoil her.

Instead, we've got to hunt down her lunatic brother. Being a special op isn't the most romantic fucking setting for a relationship.

Once I'm dressed, with the note wedged firmly in my back pocket, I do a quick check that the coast is clear before striding out of her cabin.

I don't lock the door, I've never seen anybody actually lock the doors of their cabins.

I'm guessing most of the group is busy eating, getting on with training. The courtyard of base is pretty damn dead.

I pace into the food hall with a silent prayer, praying that Dylan is absolutely nowhere within her vicinity. I don't think I'd be able to stop myself from breaking his arms, especially not after last night.

I haven't fucked around since my starting days, when I was in my early twenties and bounced from woman to woman without a care in the world.

With Nov, it's so different. It was actually special, meant something. I know that now it's happened once, it's going to be a challenge to keep a lid over it.

Tara instantly waves me over as I step into the hall, noticing she's sat with Martin and a younger blonde haired girl. I scan the room for Nova, but she's nowhere to be seen.

Clearing my throat, I swipe up a packet of oatmeal before perching myself beside Martin.

"I was just sayin' to these two, it's like a damn reunion ain't it Hendrix!" He chuckles, giving me a light slap on my shoulder.

"Now that's you say it, it does feel like that. I wish it was under better circumstances," I shake my head.

"I don't think we'll ever get a reunion under good circumstances, Leo," Tara snickers.

My eyes fall on the young blonde. She looks too young. She's got a confident expression plastered across her face as she extends her hand to me.

"Officer Hendrix, it's a pleasure. I've heard so much about you," she beams.

"Just Leo is fine, kid. And you are?" I take her hand, shaking it slightly.

"Avery Whitlock, I'm one of the rookies Officer Shields is training," she says softly.

"Then you're in for some pretty intense training," I snicker, glancing around the room before turning my attention to Tara. "Speaking of Nova, have you seen her in here?"

Tara knocks back what was left in her cup before knitting her eyebrows together, "nope. Haven't seen Novie yet, and I've been here all morning," she shrugs.

Fuck.

I urgently but discreetly fly up from my chair. She's probably absolutely fine. Nothing could have happened at base, right?

"Just going the washroom," I mumble, beginning my swift journey out of the hall and ditching my oatmeal.

"Christ alive, he must really need to go," I hear Martin's remark, earning a snicker from Tara and Avery. I'd probably find it funny if I wasn't fucking panicking.

My feet lead me right back towards her cabin, swinging open the door to surprisingly find her sitting unsuspectingly on the bed.

"You alright?" She glances up in confusion from her dismantled pistol, splayed across the bedsheets.

"Where have you been?" I sigh in relief, closing the door behind me and walking to perch beside her.

"I told you in the note, I was just getting food," she shrugs.

I want to talk with her about the fact she fucking confessed her love back to me, but there's something bigger chipping at the back of my head.

She's lying.

"Funny, because I was just in the food hall and didn't see you flouncing around," I tilt my head, eyebrows raising.

"I went early-"

"-Tara's been in there all morning, 'said she hadn't seen you," I interrupt.

"Just get out of my damn business, Jesus Christ," she hisses, pushing up to her feet.

"It's also my business," I sigh.

"Since when the fuck is my business also your business, Leo?" She snarls, starting to pace around the room whilst picking at her nails.

"Since we know that we fucking love each other, Nova!" I groan, running a frustrated hand down my face.

She doesn't say anything. I take a few deep breaths, calculating the best way to figure out what's she's hiding.

"I just want to know what's going on, Nov. I know for a fact there is something, but it's making me more damn worried not knowing what it is,"

She huffs, halting in position and tapping her foot against the floor.

"Fine, I wasn't in the food hall because I was having an appointment with my goddamn psychiatrist. Does that answer your question?"

A psychiatrist? Maybe that explains the pills in her washroom. I don't even need to ask why she's seeing a psych, it's pretty fucking obvious.

"Yes, it does," I sigh.

She slowly walks her way back over after a few seconds, perching down besides me.

"So, you got the note then?" She says quietly, changing the subject. That's my signal to not pry about the previous topic.

I chuckle and nod, tapping my back, "it's staying with me at all times."

She beams, slowly leaning across and pressing her lips to mine. I hook an arm around her waist, pulling until she's straddling me again like last night.

"Have you got anything scheduled for the next hour?" I whisper, leaning forward and pulling her collar down to kiss her neck.

"Nope, rookie training doesn't start until eleven," she grins.

"In that case," I murmur, hands tracing down to the hem of her shirt before beginning to raise it up.

Her cabin door swings open, we don't even have time to fucking move or register the fact we've been caught.

Yamato is stood in the doorway; a serious glare on his face until he notices our position and blinks a few times in disbelief.

"The fuck- actually, I'm not even going to ask right now. Vincent needs us both now, Nova. Leo, I'm sure you can come considering you're a captain in the Hawks."

"We'll be right there," Nova says sheepishly, gradually sliding her way out of my lap. Yamato leaves the cabin to our relief, closing the door behind him.

"Well, thank fuck he didn't walk in before things progressed. Maybe we should start locking the door from now on, hm?" I grin, faltering as I take notice of the stressed change in her facial expression.

"It's going to be about Nicholas," she sighs, "that's the only reason Vincent has been calling us to his office so urgently,"

"Maybe it will be, but I'm right here with you this time, alright?" I push up to my feet, leaning down to press my lips against her forehead.

She nods slowly, forcing a smile that's definitely in-genuine before squeezing my hand.

"I'm not going anywhere, Nov," I whisper.

"You'd better damn promise me that, Hendrix," she gazes up at me with those pretty, vibrant emeralds of hers.

"Cross my heart and hope to die, I promise."