you know, looking back, i never thought i would make it this far.

it's been only four years since i made this account, and yet i've changed so much.

i can't put into words how much i gained and how much i lost in so little time. but i can say this.

the path to freedom is rocky, but worth the blisters.

it took a lot for me to come to terms with who i am. and i hope that those of you still here see that there is hope, that you can find blossoms in the darkest places.

it's weird to find myself sitting in a quiet room, going back to an online graveyard of things that were left unfinished, moments trapped in time like a prehistoric fly in amber sap.

i'm a junior in high school, now. i've moved on. i fight the urge to uninstall this app because not yet, your journey here is not over, see this through.

i'm a far cry from the small seventh grader i used to be. just as stubborn, just as passionate.

just as hurt, if not more, but stronger for it.

my updates are still rambling processions of thoughts, only loosely tied together and entirely too poetic for a simple self reflection, but i like it that way.

so to the cemetery of our pasts, i raise a glass.

everything is quiet here, now, like the others before it. things will never be the same as they were. the nostalgia is only that, a fond memory of the past.

but isn't that part of moving on?

there are brief moments like this, where i sit in silence, surrounded by the faint sounds of an air conditioner running or cars driving by on a late night run to nowhere.

i am at peace in these times, surrounded by the dull cream colored walls that i have made my own, in a room small but homely.

i know my fate, but not the journey i'll take. that's part of the surprise.

and no matter where i go and where i end, i don't regret a second of this.

i'm glad i was here. that i am among the headstones in the garden of eden, that my name can be tied back to a different time, that i have known people from around the globe.

every step we took here created ripples.