(vol ii.)—
THIRTY FIVE: SARAH CHO, RESIDENT BABE

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group chat  ━━  the avengers, but cooler
[ 13 participants ]

not sarah cameron . . . sarah
fitzwilliam darcy . . . darcy
zero suit (sam)us . . . sami
scarf sale at h&m . . . isaac
scott mcnuggets . . . scott
katniss everdeen . . . allison
what fresh hale is this . . . malia
knockoff cheryl blossom . . . lydia
biles bilinski . . . stiles
pikachu . . . kira
liam neeson's knee son . . . liam
masaroni and cheese . . . mason
liam's bitch boy . . . theo

not sarah cameron
guess who got their third degree
black belt!!!

liam's bitch boy
daniel larusso

not sarah cameron
fuck that I'M the karate kid now

theo you ruined it :/

what fresh hale is this
theo ruins everything

liam's bitch boy
well that was rude

what fresh hale is this
yeah

that was the point

liam neeson's knee son
malia why are you bullying my
boyfriend

what fresh hale is this
oh sorry

did you wanna be the one to do it

liam neeson's knee son
no???

not at the moment at least

liam's bitch boy
thanks liam

love you too

knockoff cheryl blossom
back to sarah now!!

i'm assuming the one who got their
third degree black belt was you

not sarah cameron
you know what they say happens
when you assume things

it's mostly true when it comes to
my successes lol YEAH IT WAS
ME I HAVE MY THIRD DEGREE
BLACK BELT

zero suit (sam)us
GO SAR BEAR GO

see darcy and i said you have nothing
to worry about <3

fitzwilliam darcy
yeah so i could say congratulations

or i could say this because it's
more fun

zero suit (sam)us
oh i take my message back darcy's
is funnier

sarah disliked an image

pikachu
congrats sarah omg 🥰

not sarah cameron
ok u i like <3 thanks kira ur the best !!!

pikachu
so sweet of you to say but i can't be
the best when you exist

not sarah cameron

kira if you didn't have a gf and/or i
wasn't such a malira enthusiast i
would date you so hard

pikachu
i'm honored 🥰

masaroni and cheese
good job sarah i would gladly let
you kick my ass!

not sarah cameron
imagine thinking i would ever want
to kick your ass !?!?!

thanks tho mas 💗💗

masaroni and cheese
in that case can you kick other people's
asses for me 👀

not sarah cameron
for legal purposes i would NEVER!

but in a truer sense... text me details

masaroni and cheese
i believe in sarah cho supremacy

scott mcnuggets
yay sarah i knew you could do it you
deserve it more than anyone!!!

not sarah cameron
that's why we're bffs 🥰

love u scooter

scott mcnuggets
love you too ... sarah

i don't have a fun nickname for you :(

not sarah cameron
how about "#1 best friend who i like
way more than stiles" 😌

biles bilinski
fuck you

not sarah cameron
in your dreams

scott mcnuggets
GUYS

masaroni and cheese
intense

knockoff cheryl blossom
well i'd hate to break up the show
when it was just getting interesting

but congratulations sarah i'm proud
of you 💖

not sarah cameron
lydia are you flirting with me 😍

knockoff cheryl blossom
omg what gave it away :/

not sarah cameron
my gaydar is very fine tuned

but seriously tysm lyds i love u !!

katniss everdeen
Audio Message
▶ 🔘──────── 00:00:28

biles bilinski
allison in the future if you could warn
us before sending an audio message
with 30 seconds of high pitched screams
that would be greatly appreciated

katniss everdeen
stiles in the future if you could comprehend
that idgaf what you appreciate that would be
greatly appreciated

biles bilinski
i was wearing headphones!

not sarah cameron
karma had its kiss for you

liam neeson's knee son
at least he's getting kissed from
someone

not sarah cameron

i'm officially a walking liam dunbar
fan page

masaroni and cheese
what a coincidence so is theo

liam's bitch boy
i literally breathed

not sarah cameron
anyways

allison thank u for that audio message
it was so sweet 💗💘💖

katniss everdeen
anything for my future wife!

scott mcnuggets
woah woah woah

you understood what she was saying?

it was so high pitched i caught nothing

not sarah cameron
of course i understood i'm fluent in
allison

knockoff cheryl blossom
you make everything you say have gay
coded subtext

not sarah cameron
it's a gift

liam's bitch boy
so you got your third degree black
belt

cool

you're still not daniel larusso tho

not sarah cameron
malia can u bully him again pls

what fresh hale is this
theo i hate you

liam's bitch boy
that wasn't very creative

what fresh hale is this
it still holds true

liam's bitch boy
sarah i hope your black belt falls
into an industrial shredder

not sarah cameron

liam neeson's knee son
theo will you just congratulate her
and stop pretending to be an asshole

we all know you secretly like her

liam's bitch boy
i don't swing that way

liam neeson's knee son
you're so annoying

you know what i meant

not sarah cameron
so theo secretly wants to be my bestie!!!

liam's bitch boy
no

liam we're breaking up

liam neeson's knee son
k

anyways sarah theo told me just yesterday
that he thinks you're funny and he's excited
to meet you when you visit 😌

liam's bitch boy
forget breaking up

i'm getting a restraining order against you

not sarah cameron
aw theo !!!

i can't blame u i would wanna meet me
too

fitzwilliam darcy
yes and this would be the part where you
admit that you said you're glad liam has
theo because he seems like a really good
guy and you can't wait to meet him

not sarah cameron
DARCY SHUT UP !?!?!

liam's bitch boy
so sarah secretly wants to be my bestie!!!

not sarah cameron
don't use my own words against me
asshole

knockoff cheryl blossom
ok you guys literally just got exposed
for secretly liking each other why are
you still keeping up the charade

not sarah cameron
oh yeah

habit i guess?

liam's bitch boy
fine

congrats sarah i'm sure you deserved
the belt even tho you will never be daniel
larusso

not sarah cameron
thanks theo that was surprisingly sweet-ish
of you!

biles bilinski
why are you guys congratulating her

she probably stole the black belt

not sarah cameron
i mean if you're skeptical i could always
demonstrate my black belt worthy skills
when i see you in person

biles bilinski
are you threatening me???

not sarah cameron

biles bilinski
you guys all seriously still think she's so
great after this?

she's the worst person alive

one day you'll see

sarah removed stiles from
the avengers, but cooler

liam's bitch boy
ok you're right i DO like sarah

not sarah cameron
i'm sorry it's just

does he ever shut UP

what fresh hale is this
god i wish

scott added stiles to
the avengers, but cooler

not sarah cameron
what the hell scott i thought you were
my friend!!!

scott mcnuggets
i'm sorry!! i have to try to keep the
peace

knockoff cheryl blossom
i mean with those two i don't think
peace was ever an option in the first
place

not sarah cameron
see?

lydia gets it

biles bilinski
maybe peace would be an option if you
weren't such a shrew

not sarah cameron
or maybe peace would be an option if
you lost the ability to speak

scott mcnuggets
sarah

not sarah cameron
what? a girl can dream

anyways i'm done talking about stiles
now because i've already wasted too
many of the precious minutes of my
life focusing on him

so i would instead like to talk about
someone i actually LIKE!!

where the fuck is isaac

scott mcnuggets
last i checked he was sitting in the
living room playing cooking diary

so i have no idea why he's not in
the chat

scarf sale at h&m
oh i've been ignoring these messages

due to betrayal!

not sarah cameron
oh so you ARE alive

katniss everdeen
and dramatic

zero suit (sam)us
just like someone else we know

not sarah cameron
no idea what you're insinuating

anyways isaac what are you talking
about who betrayed you

scarf sale at h&m
i'll give you a hint

her name starts with s and ends with
arah cho

not sarah cameron
she sounds hot

scarf sale at h&m
evil is more fitting

masaroni and cheese
intense

pikachu
isaac what are you talking about

how is sarah evil

scarf sale at h&m
i distinctly remember being promised to
be the first person told about the results
of her third degree black belt test

but instead she texts the group chat !!!!!

knockoff cheryl blossom
oh my god

get a room

not sarah cameron
first of all lydia fuck you

second of all isaac quit trying to be petty
just to spite me when we all know you
want to congratulate me!!!

scarf sale at h&m
i have no idea what you're talking
about

liam's bitch boy
just give it up

scarf sale at h&m
ok fine

congratulations on your third degree
black belt i told you you'd get it

not sarah cameron
thank you for believing in me it's nice
to see your confidence was not misplaced
and my self doubt was 😌

fitzwilliam darcy
oh so he gets to say i told you so but
when i do it it's a crime

knockoff cheryl blossom
and we're back to "get a room"

not sarah cameron

moving on

i got my school photo back today
and i look so hot who wants to
see !!!

what fresh hale is this
isaac probably

pikachu
MALIA

i wanna see!

katniss everdeen
me too obviously

masaroni and cheese
yes show us please <3

not sarah cameron

go ahead and tell me what a babe
i am i don't mind

fitzwilliam darcy
sarah if someone called you a babe
you'd punch them in the throat

not sarah cameron
oh

good point

knockoff cheryl blossom
well i'm not gonna call you a babe
because i have no desire to get punched
in the throat

but you look so good 💗💖💘

katniss everdeen
agreed ur literally so hot

pikachu
^ !! you look beautiful ☺️

what fresh hale is this
i am gonna call you a babe because if
you punched me in the throat i could
definitely take you

so yeah you're a babe

not sarah cameron
i'm not gonna punch you in the throat
malia

and not just because i am confident
you could in fact take me

but thanks girls i love u all !!!

zero suit (sam)us
i know i already saw it because we
showed each other our pictures at lunch
but i still think this is easily one of your
best school photos you look great

fitzwilliam darcy
i agree with sam ur a hottie

not sarah cameron
my besties i love u guys

liam's bitch boy
a scrunchie?

what are you, a heather?

not sarah cameron
um no???

it's blue so obviously i'm veronica

liam's bitch boy
oh ok

understandable

liam neeson's knee son
please ignore theo's inability to send
a nice message because you look great

masaroni and cheese
yeah you're a babe (choosing to believe
you won't punch me in the throat either)

not sarah cameron
of course not mas 💗

but thanks boys omg love u so much
more than i like theo

liam's bitch boy
ouch

scarf sale at h&m
your smile is so pretty

i won't call you a babe because i'm not
sure i'm exempt from the throat punching
so instead i'll just say you look great

not sarah cameron
aw thanks isaac 💗💗

so glad you've given up being fake
mad at me

knockoff cheryl blossom
again i say

get a room

not sarah cameron

biles bilinski
can't believe she comes here fishing for
compliments and you guys just give them
to her

not sarah cameron
fishing for compliments is ok if they're
deserved 💁🏻‍♀️

biles bilinski
too bad they're not deserved

not sarah cameron
too bad hate makes you ugly

biles bilinski
too bad you're a bitch

isaac removed stiles from
the avengers, but cooler

not sarah cameron
isaac!!! that was hot!!!

i can't believe there was ever a time
when i didn't like you

scarf sale at h&m
everyone's entitled to one mistake

not sarah cameron
dork

scarf sale at h&m
takes one to know one 😌

liam neeson's knee son
just waiting for scott to add him back
again :/

scott mcnuggets
actually

i think we could all use a break

not sarah cameron

scott mcnuggets
moving on!!

sarah your picture turned out great ☺️

not sarah cameron
thx scott i love u bff

scott mcnuggets
sami's picture turned out great too!

not sarah cameron
I KNOW omg i'm so glad i convinced
him to wear his glasses for the picture
he looks so good in them !!!

wait

i know sami's picture turned out great...
and darcy knows... but how do YOU know

scott mcnuggets
oh he mentioned earlier when we were
texting that he got his school picture
back and i asked to see it so he sent it
to me

not sarah cameron
OH!

zero suit (sam)us
sarah

fitzwilliam darcy
well wasn't that just so sweet of him

zero suit (sam)us
darcy

masaroni and cheese
mason!

sorry i wanted to play

not sarah cameron
intense

masaroni and cheese
hello 911 i've been robbed

not sarah cameron
anyway sami it was SO nice of you to
send scott your school picture <3

zero suit (sam)us
anyway darcy it was SO nice of you to
shut up !!!

fitzwilliam darcy
sarah? shutting up?

clearly you don't know her very well

katniss everdeen
god i can't wait to see you guys

scarf sale at h&m
me neither

author's note: oh my god !!!! the first clueless update in a month !!!! i can't tell u how excited i am to be posting this because for weeks all i've wanted to do was write this chapter but i had the WORST writers block and i couldn't so i just cried all the time 👍🏼 but i finally did it!! it's not my best chapter but it's just a silly little filler and i hope u enjoy it mwah.

also in social (my original isaac fanfic from 2015/2016 that this is a rewrite of) stiles was the one who the oc pretended to hate and vice versa even tho they secretly loved each other but obviously in this sarah genuinely fucking loathes stiles so i missed that aspect of it and decided to push that dynamic onto theo and sarah this time around instead. ur welcome for my service.

oh yeah and i'm not proof reading this so if u see any typos no the fuck u don't.