"Why the hell are you here?" Was the first thing that came out of Maika's mouth when she spotted Madeline Robinavitch.

"Oh, you know."

"No, I most certainly do not know," Maika replied. "Why are you fucking here? You look like hell."

Maddie rolled her eyes, rubbing the side of her face. "You look like shit too, thank you very much."

Maika let out a soft scoff as she pulled her hair loose, gathering the mess of waves and curls back into a tighter ponytail. "Wow," she muttered under her breath. "How many hours of sleep did you get?"

Maddie gave a half-hearted shrug. "Same old."

They both knew what that meant: at least five hours, maybe. If that. Ever since Meredith started waking up in the middle of the night demanding every ounce of Maddie's attention, "same old" had been the new normal. Maika did not miss her kids sitting in the two-year-old range.

"Lincoln still giving you grief over PittFest?" Maddie asked her casually. Maika's jaw tightened before she chose to ignore the question. Lincoln's voice still rang in Maika's ears from that morning. I hate you. It had cut deeper than she wanted to admit. But she swallowed it down and focused on smoothing her scrub top, tightening her ponytail again with a sharp tug.

"We get the new med students and residents today," Maddie said, her voice a little clearer now as she reached for a Styrofoam cup of lukewarm coffee sitting on the counter.

Maika gave a slow nod. "Right," she muttered, a small laugh escaping her as she remembered the announcement from last month's staff meeting. "Another thing for the two of us to worry over today."

"I don't worry," Maddie deadpanned.

"Okay," Maika said with dry amusement. "Sure you don't."

"Wow."

Maika chuckled under her breath and shook her head. Her gaze drifted across the department, settling on the growing huddle of new residents and medical students circling around Dr. Michael Robinavitch, Robby.

Some of the students looked overwhelmed already, eyes wide as they darted from gurney to monitor to nurse. Maika's expression tightened for a beat as her eyes lingered on Robby. He wore the authority well, always had, but watching him lead that group came with a familiar headache.

Her husband and Robby were top candidates to lead the emergency departments. Both men were equally experienced, equally capable, and both respected. Maika remembered how tense the household had been during those weeks. Jack hadn't wanted it to change anything but how could it not? Jack had more trauma experience. Michael had more hospital politics. In the end, it was Michael who got the title and Jack who stepped back. Neither man had said much about it, but Maika knew Jack had taken it harder than he let on.

"Do they keep getting younger," Maddie asked suddenly, breaking Maika's focus, "or are we just getting old?"

"If you're old," Maika said, arching an eyebrow, "what does that make me and my husband? Ancient?"

"Now that you say that..." she teased, dragging out the words with a smirk.

The corner of Maika's mouth lifted, though her eyes remained sharp, still catching every twitch of discomfort on her friend's face. Even though the joke, the tiredness clung to Maddie like a shadow.

"We should probably get over there, don't you think?" Maddie asked, nodding toward the group gathering around Michael.

Maika exhaled through her nose and grabbed a pen from the counter. "Probably."

Rounds weren't something they had to attend anymore. As attendings, they could easily let the residents report back to them during handoffs or updates. But Maddie had a habit of dragging Maika into the introductions every time a new class rolled in. She insisted it helped build rapport. The whole putting names to faces, offering some sense of approachability in a department that could often feel cold and relentless. So Maika went, only because Maddie asked her to.

Both women placed themselves between the spaces of Dr. Heather Collins and Dr. Frank Langdon. Both the senior residents on shift this morning. Collins gave them a tight-lipped smile of acknowledgment while Langdon glanced over before turning his attention back to last night's charts or his own. Maika wasn't sure. She focused herself back on Robby, where he stood with his arms folded and addressing the ring of wide-eyed newcomers.

Beside her, Maddie was already zoning out, her gaze soft and unfocused. Maika reached up to adjust her ponytail, ignoring the introductions of the newcomers. Mel, Santos, Javadi, Whitaker.

Before anything else could be said, Dana Evans, charge nurse, interrupted Robby. "We've got two traumas from the T. Five minutes out." She called out as she continued to hear more from the dispatcher over the phone. Being a Level One trauma center had its perks. Nothing was ever dull around Maika.

"Okay, copy that. Actually, this is the most important person you're going to meet today. This is Dana, she's our charge nurse. She is the ring leader of our circus. Do what she says when she says it. Along with listening to Dana, we have our other attendings today. Dr. Honeycutt-Abbot and Dr. Robinavitch. Since there are two of us and our last names are complicated, you can call me Dr. Robby and her Dr. Maddie."

"Are you two married?" One of them, Javadi, called out. Robby looked back at Maddie, who was still dazed. Maika glanced over and noticed, immediately stepping up to introduce herself properly and have the question ignored.

"I'm Dr. Honeycutt-Abbot. Since that is a mouthful, you can call me Dr. Honeycutt. If you hear others call me Dr. Honey, know that I will not respond to you if you call me that."

Maika stepped back, nudging Maddie with her elbow, earning a small grunt from her. Maika muttered through a clenched fist, "Michael introduced you. Smile and wave."

Maddie did as told, not really thinking it through before Robby picked it up again, also choosing to ignore Javadi's' initial question about their marriage. Legally speaking, Michael and Madeline Robinavitch were still married, though would they continue to be, that was what had Maika worried the most.

Robby stepped aside, motioning toward the overhead monitor mounted above the nurse's station. The glowing screen displayed a lineup of patients, their triage codes, length of wait times, pending labs, consults, and a long list of "admitted—awaiting bed" notifications that had practically become permanent fixtures on the board.

"As you can see," Robby began, "our house is always packed. Mostly with borders—admitted patients who are waiting on a bed upstairs. Sometimes for days. Which means your workups need to be fast and thorough. Be decisive. Be efficient. Know when to investigate, and know when to move on. Your senior residents for this shift are Dr. Collins and Dr. Langdon," Robby said, tilting his head toward the two behind him. Heather gave a nod; Langdon barely lifted his chin. "You'll report to them first, and they will report to me."

"And me," Maika called out. It wasn't a correction due to her pride or ego in front of the med students. She said it because it was Michael who needed the reminder. Regardless of what was happening between him and Maddie, he didn't get to pretend Maika wasn't there. This was her department, too. He might be the senior attending position, but she was there for help as much as he was. Though a part of her did enjoy pushing Michael's buttons since they've known each other for years. He was the godfather of Nora after all.

"And Dr. Honeycutt-Abbot," he added.

His eyes drifted past Maika, toward Maddie, the way they always did during these introductions. The three of them had been doing this long enough that it was almost routine. But this time, Maddie didn't say anything. There was a brief pause before Michael looked away and moved on with the signouts from the senior residents.

Maika sighed and began to make her way to the trauma bay doors, preparing herself for the arrival of the traumas Dana had called out earlier.

Maika paused as she thought of her husband who definitely seemed worn out. She hoped he made time for the session with his new therapist, who was meeting him virtually and working with their odd schedule. Please let him sleep today. She thought before a sharp voice called her attention back to reality.

"Incoming!" Princess, a nurse in the ER, called out as she helped the paramedics with ventilation of the patient on the gurney.

"42-year-old male, Sam Wallace. Blunt head with agonal respirations. Dropped down on the T tracks. Couldn't tube him, LMA in place."

Maika got her hands on the gurney as Robby approached, snapping gloves in place. Maika gave him a look, one that screamed, I got this.

"Suicide?" She asked, getting her own gloves on to begin examining him. Once Robby gave a once-over on the gentleman, he moved over to the second person who was incoming.

The paramedic shook his head. "Rescue. He's a good Samaritan. Took a spill helping an elderly woman who fell off the tracks. She's right behind us."

"Okay, Trauma one. Let's go."

The paramedics and Princess followed Maika's lead, moving the man to the room while Robby focused on the woman who had a degloved leg.

"Mohan, start the workup," Maika said, guiding the young resident. Mohan nodded, taking her stethoscope to listen to the heartbeats of their patient.

"Ready?" Maika called. Everyone in the room nodded, " Alright, one, two, three." And swiftly did she and the team move to carry the man from the stretcher to the bed.

"Good breath sounds bilaterally, but we need to protect his airway," Mohan called. Maika nodded, agreeing, and prompted her to continue the workup. "Pupils four millimeters and reactive."

"That's good. What's your plan for medication?"

"120 ketamine, 80 of rock."

"Good," Maika praised. She reached for scissors, cutting the bandage open to view the head injury better. "That's a lot more blood than expected."

Mohan looked at her and took over for Maika, peering at the injury and trying to come up with a reasonable cause. "He's probably anticoagulated for A-fib. Let's check his medical records, see if it's on a DOAC. Stand by with four-factor PCC if there's a brain bleed."

"Uhh, you. What's in the PCC?"

"Me?" The intern asked. Maika nodded, motioning for her to answer quickly.

"Right. Clotting factors two, seven, nine, and ten."

"Perfect. Let's finish this up." Maika said, motioning for Mohan and the intern to continue. Samira was a cautious woman, one Maika can't help but see a reflection of her younger self. Back when she first found the love of medicine. Samira had the same meticulousness. The same need to be perfect in every aspect of the game. She worked fast but not fast enough, always pausing to look at Maika to make sure she wasn't making any faces, seeing if Maika would disagree with how shes running the trauma.

Maika wasn't blind to what her husband and Robby often called her when they worked with her. SlowMo. She knew why they did. But she wasn't particularly slow. She just was careful. She didn't want to lose anyone if it could be prevented. Maika understood that. She didn't see it as a flaw with how careful Mohan was. If anything, Maika knew Mohan's instincts just needed polishing. What she needed was someone to push her to trust herself. Maika saw her as someone who could take the room if needed. After all, that is what Maika was there for. To train and educate the future of medicine.

Across the gurney where Mohan worked was the intern. Trinity Santos. Of course, she knew the intern's name. She knew them all but she was waiting for Santos to show more than ego to humanize her. If Santos didn't humanize patients, why would Maika give her that courtesy?

Maika shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her eyes scanning the bay without really retaining anything. She began rolling her shoulders to ease the tightness creeping up her neck. The movement was automatic, her body remembering what her mind was trying to ignore. For a moment, her thoughts drifted back to her husband. She hoped he had kept his therapy appointment like he promised he would.

Age, time, and experience had softened him and made him into the man he was now. One who tried harder than anyone she knew, even when the world around him gave him every excuse not to. Link, for example, would test him tonight once she got home for dinner. She knew him too well to think otherwise. Jack didn't lose his temper the way their fathers had. He didn't slam things or shout just to be louder. They both had grown up with angry fathers who demanded obedience and had their fear equal respect. It was one of the first conversations Maika and Jack had before getting engaged. How, if or when they had kids, they would build a life together, raise them, and make sure to not repeat the life they had. That their children would never wonder if the next word out of a parent's mouth would leave them feeling smaller than they were.

There had been mistakes along the way. No home was perfect. But they had tried. Every day, they tried. Still, Jack would carry this like a stone tucked in his chest. He would wonder if the years he spent away had created a space between him and the older children that he couldn't cross now. Jack had missed so much when Nora and Link were young. It hadn't been a choice he made lightly, but it had been a choice he made before they were even thoughts or ideas. Before Nora was able to run to him in the airports, and before Link could catch a ball.

With August, it had been different. He was there for the teething fevers, first day of school, skinned knees, and bedtime stories. Parenting with Gus was natural for Jack because there had been no time apart to bridge.

His older children, Jack still felt like he was making up ground for a race he lost before realizing it had started. Nora and Link were the children he tried to not parent with a heavy hand. That's why Link's outburst would weigh him down, Maika thinks. Not because he would be mad at Link, but because he failed Maika by not teaching better for the days he was there.

Maika wasn't mad at her son. He was a teenager, full of too much feelings and too little understanding of the world. But Jack would hear those words and feel them like a nail in the coffin as if he hadn't done enough.

And Maika hated that for him. He was a good father. He always had been. Even if he never saw it as clearly as she did, Maika knew their children were better for having him as their father.

Footsteps approached, and she glanced up to see Robby stepping back into the bay, pulling a new pair of gloves on as he walked toward her.

"How's it going?" he asked, his eyes scanning the room.

Maika didn't look away from her team. "Fine."

Robby nodded, letting Garcia, a surgical resident, take a look. "Bring me up to speed."

Mohan stepped in from the back, beginning to explain the case with Santos confirming a few questions and Princess wrapping up. After a few probing questions, Garcia directed the team to bring him up to CT once they got him a bit more stable.

"A pleasure as always, Garcia. Thank you." Maika thanked. Garcia turned to look at her, a small smile on her lips before leaving.

"A pleasure as always with you, Dr. Honey."

Maika shook her head and stepped out of the room, leaving Mohan in charge, with the intern staying behind to assist. As she made her way toward the nurses's station, she looked up at the board and caught Robby trying to shake off Gloria, their Chief Medical Officer. Maika scoffed under her breath as she overheard the words, understaffed and nurse shortage. All the keywords that made her laugh.

She had been here, in this hospital, just shy of two decades. She had watched the personnel staff changes pass through. She lived through world crises and her own life events in this hospital. This ER witnessed her first delivery and watched her get rushed to OB with the sons that followed. 

She stood shoulder to shoulder with people waiting to see the next day again. She held her breath, waiting to see the next day. The ER was not for the faint of heart, and it sure wasn't built for whatever Gloria was spewing at Robby. Not to mention the Adamson name drop, today of all days was comical to Maika.

"You can step up your game, or step aside," Gloria stated, leaving Robby standing there, staring at her figure in disbelief.

Maika walked up behind him, grabbing his attention with a crooked smile. "Did I just hear Gloria say you need to step down? Because if so, I'll let Jack know to start practicing his two-step."

Michael turned to look at her, his own eyes shifting from disbelief at Gloria to disbelief at her. Maika shrugged her shoulders, finding a computer to start charting on her patient.

"Cardiac arrest. ETA ten minutes. Where should we put it?" Donnie called out to the doctors surrounding Dana. "Anywhere," Robby answered for them.

"We'll have to put someone in the hall," Dana confirmed. Donnie nodded and took off, trying to see what and who he could rearrange to make room for their incoming.

Her eyes moved to scan the area, noting where all the new faces were. Mel was with Maddie, and Whitaker was with Langdon, but she didn't see her intern with Mohan as Mohan stepped out of the room Sam was in.

"Hey!" She called, getting her attention. "Where'd the intern go?"

"Left to watch Langdon and Collins with Garcia on the degloving."

Maika nodded, clicking her pen against the desk. "Alright, thanks!"

Interns were creatures of curiosity. They were birds out of cages, waiting to see what they could do with their newfound wings. It wasn't unusual for them to bounce to more chaotic cases. Maika was the expert in her intern year on doing the same thing. So she gave grace. Until it begins to interfere with patient care.

"Uh, Doctor Robby? Doctor Honeycutt?" A young man, Whitaker, called out, walking over to them. "She took a fall."

Maika raised an eyebrow, watching the two med students come out. Both looked clammy and shaky.

"No, I just tripped on a gurney. I'm fine." Javadi reassured the attendings. Maika and Robby saw Whitaker give a subtle shake of his head, both of them glancing at each other before Robby sighed.

"Why don't you go get a cold drink in the staff lounge."

"I'm fine. I swear."

"We know," Maika cut in, giving Robby some slack. "It's hospital policy. Robby and I fill out paperwork for Papercuts. You can't even begin to imagine the documents we complete when it comes to med students."

Javadi stood there, not really knowing what to do or say in that situation. Robby shoved his glasses back on and gestured down the hall toward the lounge when Javadi started wandering in the opposite direction. Maika stifled a laugh, ducking her head as she turned back to her computer and pulled up her next set of notes.

She could feel Robby's stare before she even looked up. And considering he was both her boss and her best friend's husband, it lingered a little too long for Maika's liking. Finally, she leaned back in her chair, folding her arms loosely across her chest, and turned to face him.

"Can I help you?"

Michael shook his head, and without saying a word, he slid away from his computer and began to check in with the residents and nurses.

Maika logged off her computer, pushing herself up from the chair with a soft creak and slipping her badge back into her pocket. She moved through the hallway on autopilot, keeping her head down, weaving past obstacles without thinking about it.

When she reached the bathroom, she slipped inside and let the door close behind her with a dull click. The cool, sterile air hit her first, a faint scent of antiseptic lingering in the cramped space. She moved into one of the stalls, shutting the door gently, her back pressing lightly against it as she finally let herself pause.

Then she pulled her phone from the pocket of her scrub top, her thumb swiping across the screen to wake it up.

The messages loaded slowly under the terrible hospital Wi-Fi. She stared at the screen, willing something to show up. Nothing from either of her teens, but that didn't bother Maika too much. A message in Jack's thread was marked as unread. She tapped the chat, his new text loading at the bottom: Showering the night off. Gonna grab a few hours of sleep before jumping on a call with the dr. Stay safe. Love you honey.

The coil of tension she didn't know she had unraveled in her chest before she even finished reading. She could picture him at home now. Keys on the side table rather than hanging where they're meant to be. Jacket thrown over a kitchen chair. Maybe a granola bar was eaten, if Maika was lucky enough to spot the one she left out for him. Nights probably were better for him. The house was quiet with no one home. The warmth of the sun coming in and making the bedroom so hard to leave.

She leaned her head lightly against the stall door as she debated on texting him back or just hearting the message. Either way, her notification would ring through and get him up. The world was muted to everyone but the family. That was his rule when it came to working opposite shifts of his wife and living a different time change as his kids.

Love you too. Sleep as long as you can. I'll be home later. 

Authors Note: 

Writing a whole HOUR of a show is harder than I thought. SO it turns out, I will in fact be splitting episodes up. Plus, so much happens that doesn't affect Maika nor has her being super interactive with. 

Until next time!