Thump.

Thump.

… Thump.

I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. That’s all I can hear. A constant pounding that blocks out everything else in the room. The room three stories up in the justice building of District 2 that I’ve been locked in for hours now, guards of Peace Keepers posted on the outside of the door. The only people who have been in here is Peeta, Effie and a couple of people with contacts to the Capitol.

I know what you’re thinking.

You’re wrong.

I would have thought the same exact thing if you’d have told me all the details even just a few hours ago. But you’re wrong.

Both Peeta and Effie tried to break through, more than once. But I can't hear them. All I can hear is thump. Thump.

I should backtrack a little.

After we left District 7 I felt so incredibly drained. I couldn’t stop thinking about Caius in District 12 watching the footage. See, how it works is that the morning District is recorded and played just before the appearance in the evening, that one is played live to the Capitol, and anyone with a television. They make sure the districts have enough power to watch the Tour. How kind of them.

I didn’t sleep very well the next night, it didn’t help that I had to be up early for the appearance in District 6. There were three districts to get through today. I don’t know if anyone in District 5 knew about the tribute I saved, Lilia. I know she had a husband and a mentor, other than that I don’t know if she had anyone else.

When we made it to District 5 I searched the stage for Lilia’s relatives but there was no one on her side. My first thought was to where her husband was. My next thought was that I hope they didn’t find out. I felt stupid after that because I’m sure they would have come for me if they knew she was alive.

Things ran by smoothly, and when we finally made it to the train that evening I was exhausted. I was assaulted by Effie’s praise and her excitement about reaching the Capitol. I was so close to snapping at her but I didn’t. I made sure that I didn’t lose my cool. Eventually I just needed some time to sleep. I wasn’t at all hungry.

“Sorry Effie, I’m just so tired. I really think that I should get some sleep so that I’m fresh for tomorrow.” I smiled weakly and she agreed.

I wandered off to bed and couldn’t even be bothered changing my clothes before jumping in. I lay there for a few minutes and sighed when I heard the door click open. There’s only one person who comes in here.

“Are you nervous?” He came and sat down beside me.

“Surprisingly not, I think I’m just too tired to notice any other thing that I’m feeling.” I rolled over to face him.

“Well get some sleep and tell me how you feel tomorrow.” He brushed my hair out of my face and stood up.

“Are you not staying?” I asked.

“I will, I have to talk to Effie for a while but I’ll come in later, I promise.” He smiled and headed out.

I was asleep almost instantly.

I’m sure I woke up a few times in the night, it seems so unimportant now, the nightmares.

When it was finally morning I felt my stomach twisting itself around inside me. It was less than twelve hours until I made my appearance in District 2. I told myself that I was exaggerating the possibilities; that it was going to be just like every other district.

When Cinna was finishing my new look he noticed that something was on my mind.

“You were a lot easier for the prep team to handle today, are you alright?” He was mixing something in his palette and looking over at me.

“Yeah.” He raised an eyebrow.

“That was convincing.”

“Sorry, I’m just nervous.”

“Aren’t you always?”

“Today is District 2.” I sighed.

“Try not to think about it.”

“That’s easier said than done.” I grumbled.

“You’re just going to make it worse than it really is. I promise I’ll tone it down as much as possible for District 2. We don’t want to ruffle any feathers, do we?” He smiled and put his hand on mine. “Relax, okay? No one wants you to hurt yourself stressing about this. You’ll be fine. And if you’re not then someone has me to answer to.” He smiled and I felt myself calm down a little. “Now, flick your hair back, and try not to panic.”

Of course, in saying ‘don’t panic’ I instantly became worried about what he was going to do to my hair. Then I laughed because it was so far from what I was actually worried about that it served as a small distraction. Cinna always seemed to have the right thing to say.

District 3 was quite tame. I stood in the warm sunlight with my hair glimmering from whatever it was that Cinna had put into it. I said my part and we were ushered back onto the train. District 2 just seemed to be coming closer and closer and there was nothing I could do to slow it down or stop it.

Cinna had an idea to try and snap me out of my fear. I told him I’d try anything and I almost regretted it. He had me stooped over his sink while he rinsed out my hair and scrubbed the make-up off my face. Granted, it helped, but I was still nervous.

I had a bad feeling. Haymitch had told me that this would be the hardest part but I didn’t think I would feel this ill. I haven’t eaten all day but I know that’s not why I’m feeling so bad. Blaze and Cress have been floating through my mind all day. I know that they shouldn’t and I’m just making it worse but I can't help it.

When my face was dry and my hair was returning to normal Cinna began to apply my new look. This time it was just a simple bit of gold eyeliner with a flouncy black knee-length dress.

“Are we a matching set tonight Cinna?” He laughed at my question and the smile lingered on his face.

“I suppose we are, so don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

“Do you really think I can do this?”

“You’re a big tough girl, I’m sure you’ll be perfect as always.” He put a comforting hand on my cheek.

I looked up at the clock on the wall. Cinna saw me staring at it and sighed.

“There’s less than an hour until we get there. I suggest you go and do something relaxing before you put wrinkles in that pretty face.”

I took his advice and went out to the dining car where Peeta was sat reading a book by the window. As I sat across from him his eyes darted up to me and he smiled as he turned the page.

“You look terrified.”

“Thanks for that, Cinna sent me out here to relax.”

He laughed. “Well, you’re not doing a very good job of it.”

I wanted to throw something at him, and then I laughed because I could see what he was trying to do. We sat there in silence for the rest of the trip.

It was a short trip.

Before I knew it I was there in District 2 with Effie shoving me out of the train.

“Come now dear! We don’t want to be late!” She shuffled by me in her shoes that were bigger than mine.

Lucky that this district is a little ritzier than the others and it actually has a nice paved path to the justice building. If it were an old dirt path like the others I might have fallen over more than once. Peeta walked with me, holding onto my arm firmly. I was glad to have him there.

As we entered the building I felt my heart pounding away in my chest and I let out a slow breath to try and calm myself down.

“You’ll be okay, I promise.” Peeta gave me a smile and squeezed my hand as he and Effie headed off the one of the rooms.

I was left waiting in the wings. I bit down on my lip and looked around; this place was definitely fancier than any of the others so far.

“Olivia Hanspark, we finally meet.” I spun around to see a stick-thin woman in a grey pant-suit staring at me with folded arms. “I’m Mishra Monroe, the mayor.” She held out a hand for me to shake and I took it.

She had very dark painted lips with sunken cheeks. Her eyebrows were shaped into thin lines with distinct curves that made her look angry, though she may have just hated me. She wore her shoulder-length dark hair out and it fell straight down past her face.

She was quite possibly the scariest woman I have ever seen.

“Olivia.” I offered.

She smiled a little. “I know, we all know.”

I blushed and looked away.

“I’ll meet you on stage soon. I’m about to start my speech. Try not to look so sick to the stomach.” She seemed to be friendly enough.

She began to walk to the entrance of the stage when I called out to her.

“Ms Monroe?” She turned to look at me expectantly. “I was just wondering if you could tell me what to expect out there. I mean, am I public enemy number one?” I tried to laugh a little and she just gave a cool little smile.

“Miss Hanspark, you are not the first tribute to kill one of ours, and I highly doubt you’ll be the last. Just don’t look down at anyone in particular for too long, because I can guarantee that they hate you, it’s how they are every year with the victors; furious.” She seemed a little amused by the things that she was saying, like she’s had to say them year after year. “Only a victor from this district is celebrated, or tolerated. So please, try not to look like you’re going to throw up on them. They’ll like you even less. Oh, and good luck on the rest of your tour.” She turned and left.

I was able to breathe a little easier after that. When I heard my cue to go onstage I walked out with a little smile and a small wave, trying to be low-key. There was light applause that stopped shortly.

I stood by the mayor and looked out at the sea of stony faces that were glaring up at me. I tried my hardest not to look down at the tribute’s families but my eyes flicked to them for just a second.

Then I had to get a better look.

I looked down at Cress’ family. There were two men who looked to be in their thirties that had scarily similar glares to Cress, I guessed that they were his brothers. There was also a girl who looked a little younger than me with jet black hair staring at me with so much venom in her eyes I was afraid that just her gaze would cause me harm.

I looked over to the other side, where Blaze’s family sat. A young man sat there with arms folded over his bulky muscled chest. He had blond hair in tufts and grey eyes that were glazed over. An older woman with a striking resemblance to Blaze had narrowed eyes as well as folded arms. She had to be Blaze’s mother. Next to her was a man who was probably her husband.

I wanted to apologize to them all but I knew that there would be no possible way for that to go down well.

I said my rehearsed lines as needed and when it came time for me to give my speech I took a shaky breath and moved over behind the podium.  I rested my hands on the smooth wooden top and stared down at it, probably for too long, before I looked up to speak.

“I… Firstly, I would like to thank the citizens of this district for welcoming me for my Victory Tour.” I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my forehead in the late afternoon sun, though it was probably the nerves more than anything. “This has not been easy for any of us.” I took another breath. “I want to wish you all good luck in the games next year and I hope that-”

I was cut off by a lyrical voice calling out through the square. “Kay-ah!”

It sounded like some kind of bird call and I looked up to see where it was coming from, so did everyone else. They were looking all around, the sound was bouncing off the justice building and confusing some people. I caught sight of a figure dressed all in black with a hood pulled over their face.

I only noticed them for a second, because the next thing I saw was a great ball of fire hurtling towards me. I leapt back from the podium just as it hit, square in the middle. It went up in smoke and I saw what it was that had hit, it was a flaming arrow with a rose tied to the tail end.

I could feel myself shaking. That person, the one who made the call, they had aimed an arrow up at me on stage and fired. I stared at it. I couldn’t peel my eyes away from it. Around me there was chaos.

Peace keepers were rushing from their posts and heading for the crowd of people, who were clearly in a panic. They were pushing past one another, eager to get out of the square. I looked up, trying desperately to find the shooter. They shouldn’t be hard to spot in their pitch black attire but I couldn’t see them. They had vanished, like smoke. Like a ghost.

I felt like I was the only person who saw them, I was the only one who saw them aim and fire. What a fitting set of terms for something like this.

The podium was covered in flame now, my whole body was shaking and all I could smell, all I could see, was smoke and flames.

I didn’t even see Peeta grab me around the waist and all but drag me inside. The only thing I could see was that arrow, and the only thing I could hear was thump, thump, thump.

Peeta was standing in front of me practically shouting at me but I couldn’t hear him. I couldn’t hear anything. I was trying to shove him away and I held my hands over my ears to try and block out that sound but I couldn’t. I must have been screaming and crying but I can't remember anything after that.

I blacked out.

The next thing I remember is sitting on a couch in one of the rooms of the justice building with Peeta and Effie staring at me nervously. Peeta opened his mouth to speak to me.

“…thump…thump…”

Effie looked over at him and then back at me, her lips moving away

“…thump…thump…thump…”

Peace keepers came in and out, that’s how I know they’re guarding the door. Other than that, I don’t know anything.

I could hardly believe it was happening, all that worrying about District 2 turned out to be warranted.

Slowly the voices began to break through my hazy trance.

“… don’t think it has.” Effie’s voice started coming back to me.

“Well I’m sure if it had there would be different protocols.” Now Peeta’s.

“Still, I can't believe that anyone would do such a thing.” She sounded genuinely upset.

“I know, I was nervous about it but I never thought that anyone would set the stage on fire.”

“It wasn’t on fire…” I whispered.

The two of them spun around and stared at me. I was beginning to realise what the attack symbolised.

“Olivia? What did you say?” Peeta asked.

“It wasn’t on fire… it was ablaze…” I whispered again.

The two looked at one another and then back at me.

“Olivia, dear, are you alright?” Effie was treading very lightly, even for her.

I looked up and from one to the other, my eyes glassy with unfallen tears.

“I think I’ll just… go and tell them that you’re responding now…” She stood up slowly and made quick steps towards the door.

Once she was out of the room Peeta pulled his chair in closer to me and put a tentative hand on my knee.

“Do you remember anything?” He asked.

“I remember the noise… and the flames… and I remember you tearing me away, but after that…” I looked ahead blankly, the tears blurring my vision. “I feel like I probably threw up… and my eyes are a little sore…”

“You did throw up. And the eye thing is probably because if I wasn’t holding your arms by your side you were trying to claw your eyes out. Not to mention you were crying pretty uncontrollably. I had to carry you up here.”

“Where exactly is here?”

“We’re on the third floor of the justice building. We’re waiting for instruction now.” He sighed.

“How long have we been up here?”

“I don’t know, hours now. I’m pretty sure it’s after sunset.”

Then I remembered the filming. “Oh god, the video…”

“It’s okay, they cut the footage almost straight away. The person called out and we saw you stop and stare into the crowd. Then you jumped back and all we could see was fire, and the screens went black. That’s when I started running out here to get you. It could only be something horrible.”

“Haymitch…”

“He’ll be fine, you still have to finish the tour and he’ll know not to do anything stupid.”

“He might think I’m dead.”

“Well he’ll know the truth soon enough.” He squeezed my knee a little and I gave him a nervous look before Effie came barging through the door again.

“They’re almost finished searching the train, soon enough we’ll be off to District 1, though they’re delaying the tour a few days to let you… recover.” She managed a weak smile.

“Thanks Effie.” I said, feeling slightly ill.

“I’ll come back to collect you when we’re ready to get going.” She stepped out again and pulled the door shut behind her.

“Why are they searching the train?” I asked.

Peeta just looked at me as though he didn’t really want to answer.

“Oh… right. They’re looking for anyone or anything else that might be in place to kill me.”

“I don’t think that’s what this was about.”

“How could it not be? Did you see their faces out there? They hated me.”

“That doesn’t mean that it was about that, maybe it wasn’t about you at all.”

“Since when did trying to kill someone make it not about them?”

“Look, whoever did it was obviously not trying to kill you.” Peeta said.

“Yeah, you’re right, shooting an arrow at someone isn’t how you get the job done. They’d have been better off hurling insults.” I snapped.

“Think about it for a second; why would they have made that sound if they wanted to kill you? It attracted attention and served absolutely no clear purpose.” I was silent for a second as I thought about it. “Why would they use a flaming arrow? If they wanted to kill you dramatically then getting struck with an arrow would have sufficed. If it were on fire it would have been tacky, ridiculous. This was… kind of poetic.”

“Poetic? Really? And maybe they just missed me, miscalculated their aim or their strength.”

“Yes, poetic. I think there was a much better reason for them to set that arrow on fire.” I looked up and I knew I couldn’t hide what was written on my face. We both knew this had something to do with Blaze. “They didn’t want to kill you. No one is that accurate by accident, hitting the podium square in the middle, it’s narrower than you are, besides, you just stood there looking at it until I dragged you away. They could have shot at you again.”

“The whole crowd was moving around, trying to see them.”

“Yeah, and no one did.”

“I did.” He looked up. “They were all in black with a dark hood. They were just kind of standing there and I only saw them for a second because I was looking for the sound, and then the arrow was just sort of… coming for me. The next second they were gone. They’re probably dead by now.”

“There has to have been a Peace Keeper that saw them, you can't just smuggle a bow and arrow past those guys, they’ll have your head in an instant, especially when you’re shooting at someone from the Capitol.”

“They’re all going to hate me, they’ll side with the Capitol over the rest of us, they take care of District 2.”

“District 2 has never shot at a Capitol citizen before.”

“Well a Capitol citizen has never killed a tribute before, let alone their most famous victors.”

“That’s a lie.” He said with half a laugh. “Every Hunger Games a tribute dies at the hands of the Capitol, and for what? For the enjoyment of its people. I know killing their tributes and saving others isn’t going to do any good though, we’ll have to work something out.”

“Maybe Haymitch will have some ideas.”

“Maybe, but hopefully, if the shooter really is dead, then it’ll turn the district away from the Capitol.”

“They don’t hate the Capitol, they still give them everything, and pardon them for any minor wrongdoings in return for favours. They hate me because I’m not like them. I wasn’t betting on a tribute of theirs to win, I wanted them dead. District 2 has more people than any of the others, and it’s filled with a whole lot of trained fighters. If there’s any district that I want on my side it’s this one, and they are going to hate me because I wasn’t on theirs. The only tributes I killed were from their district. When this thing breaks they are going to know that. They are going to think that I’m against them too. The sad part is that they don’t even realise that the Capitol has them so well trained. If it came down to saving the people of the Capitol or the people of 2, Snow wouldn’t even bat an eye. You know that. If someone had to be sacrificed from their side if a war broke out, you can bet they would cut them loose. It’s not fair.” I breathed out heavily and Peeta sighed.

“Look, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there and we can discuss it where it’s safe in 12, but right now you just have to drop this fear you have. They weren’t trying to kill you, they were sending you a message.”

“Yeah, that they are not on my team.”

“Maybe so, but they don’t want you dead.”

“Well they might but the shooter didn’t think it was the right time.”

He smiled a little. “Just breathe okay?”

“I’ll breathe when I’m home.”

“You’re going to be waiting a while.”

“Yeah, I know.”