The crashing waves that my emotions had been riding slowly began to settle as the days passed. It was strange – knowing that after all these years I did have a family. A mother. However, no matter how many times we passed each other in the halls or locked eyes across a sea of people in the Grand Hall, I couldn't muster up the strength to do more than give her an acknowledging nod.

It was clear that others had picked up on the tension between the two of us, namely Kira and Finn, who had seen me duck out of sight on more than one occasion when Catherine was around. They'd both confronted me, and though I'd been honest in telling them that I knew, I was also clear when I said that I wasn't ready to talk about it. I knew they were concerned and had questions, but they kept their thoughts to themselves, for which I was appreciative.

A side effect of ignoring Catherine however, meant that my training schedule had been shattered to pieces. I knew I didn't have the capability to listen to her instructions and work with her while things sat as they did, and because of this, I'd been skipping both our in-class and physical training sessions. My other option had been Beckett, but he wasn't talking to me. Not since the conversation we'd had in the gazebo, and with the way we'd left things before that, I was on the fence about reaching out to him at all.

However, not wanting to sit back and do nothing, I took matters into my own hands.

Standing outside of Joe's office, I knocked; waiting until I heard his voice inviting me in to push open the door and step inside.

"Aspen," he said, slightly surprised as he hadn't expected me, "What brings you here?"

"I finished reading through the binder you gave me," I said, my words hesitant as I slid the binder out from under my arm and onto his desk.

He nodded, casting an expectant look towards me. "And I'm assuming you have questions?"

"I did," I took a deep breath, exhaling slowly, "but Catherine cleared a lot of things up for me."

"Okay," he drawled, clasping his hands together atop his desk, "then what can I do for you?"

"I was wondering – " I paused for a moment, trying to think of the best way to phrase my next words. " – if you had any time over the next couple of weeks to fit me into your training schedule, or find somebody else that could." I bit my lip, watching as his forehead creased with confusion and knowing I'd have to further explain. "Things aren't really working out with me and my mom."

"Ah," he said, understanding flashing in his eyes as he leant back in his chair, "I'm guessing she told you."

I nodded, subconsciously replaying the events of my conversation with Catherine in my mind. Unable to sit down due to a rush of restlessness, I walked to the side of his office, running my fingers over the books that lined the shelves. Some were classics, like Sherlock Holmes and Casino Royale, while others were clearly job specific. Titles like Disarming Bombs and other Explosives and The Art of Tailing fell under the latter category, and with defined creases in the spines, they appeared to be well used.

"You know she volunteered to train you for a reason," Joe continued, realizing after a prolonged silence that I wasn't going to reply. I turned towards him, attempting to appear unbothered, but with the way I shifted constantly from one foot to another, I knew I wasn't pulling it off. "She hasn't been directly involved in training new recruits for years now."

The corners of my lips pulled upwards, though it was more due to an uneasiness that flowed through me than a feeling of happiness. "Which should've been my first clue that something was up," I pointed out. "She only wanted to train me because she knew I was her daughter – which apparently, everyone else knew too."

"Now, I'm not denying that I knew about the relationship between you and Catherine, but it wasn't my place to tell you, nor was it anyone else's but Catherine herself," he said. "She didn't want you to be overwhelmed with this, on top of dealing with the stress of leaving the comfort of your old life behind. That being said," he paused, the serious tone in his voice morphing into something softer, "I am glad she's told you."

"She's my mom," I said, aware of the nod of confirmation he gave as I stated what the both of us already knew, "but I haven't been able to talk to her since I found out. I just... I can't think of anything to say."

"I'm sure it's not easy, being thrown another curveball," he replied, "but if you don't think you can handle working with her right now, I'll talk to Catherine. I'm sure that we can work something out so you can train with me until you're ready to set things straight with her."

I released a breath of relief, my chest feeling lighter as I said, "Really?"

Joe nodded. "Just know that the longer you put the conversation off, the harder it's going to be."

Sighing, I knew he was right, but this wasn't something that could be talked through and then pushed aside. Once everything was out in the open, there was no going back, and that wasn't something I was ready to face just yet.

----------

"How was your lesson with Joe?" Kira asked a few days later as I walked into the lab. She stepped back from the experiment she was working on, pushing her safety glasses up onto her head, and waiting as I dropped my stuff on the table at the front.

"It was okay," I replied, taking a seat far enough away from her out of fear that I'd unknowingly interfere with her work. "He went over a few qualities that a good agent should have – "

"Let me guess," Kira cut in, "intuition, intelligence, and willpower."

"Yeah," I said, sometimes forgetting that Kira had once been an agent herself, "and then he spent the rest of the time throwing out different scenarios to see how I'd react." I raised my shoulders in a half-hearted shrug. "Not boring, but not all that exciting either."

"I remember those days," she mused. "Don't worry, you'll be learning how to disarm a bomb in no time." As my jaw went slack and my eyes widened, Kira erupted with laughter. "I'm kidding," she paused, "well, kind of. Just remember that when you're out in the field, anything can happen. All of the little exercises that they give to new recruits seem pointless at first, but when you're in a sticky situation, sometimes thinking back to the basics can actually help."

"Good to know," I drawled, pulling out a few older case files that Joe had given me to study. "What are you working on?"

"Just finishing up a new batch of healing solution," she said, grabbing a small beaker filled with a bright blue liquid after readjusting her safety glasses. Lifting the beaker to the larger distilling system she had set up, she slowly poured the liquid into the top, watching as it ran through the piping and landed in the clear solution at the bottom. "The infirmary's been running low for a while, so this needs to be mixed by the end of the day for it to have time to chill overnight."

"You have to freeze it?"

"Not entirely," she corrected. "Just enough for the molecules to vibrate slowly for a few hours and firmly mix together before we start storing it at room temperature."

I raised my eyebrows, an incredulous expression crossing my face. "Are you sure you weren't brought in as some kind of chemical genius?"

She shook her head. "One of the recruiters found me at women's homeless shelter about four years ago," she explained, her voice somber as she kept her eyes focused on the work she was doing. The fear and doubt was evident as she debated whether or not to continue. "My parents had kicked me out about a month before, and while out earlier that afternoon, I'd fought off a larger man who was looking for cash, having been trained in martial arts as a kid. At the time, I hadn't realized that S.I.C.O had already taken interest in me, and I didn't believe the recruiter when she first came to talk to me, but eventually I found myself here."

"Your parents kicked you out?" I asked in disbelief, not expecting my innocent question to cause our conversation to take such a serious turn.

A sad smile pulled at her lips as she nodded, her gaze lifting upwards to meet mine. "We had differing views on my sexual orientation."

The realization that she was a lesbian threw me for a moment, having not expected it, but what surprised me the most was that, just because of one insignificant detail, Kira's parents had had the audacity to shut her out of their lives. "Kira," I trailed off quietly, "I didn't know."

"It's not something I really talk about," she admitted, "plus, I gained a new family when I started training here, so I try not to dwell much on my past."

I searched for the right words to say – to let her know that if she did want to talk, I'd be there to listen, but before I could vocalize my thoughts, the familiar loud beep sounded throughout the room. We were no longer the only ones in the lab as Finn stepped inside, the grin on his face instantly brightening up the atmosphere.

"Ladies," he nodded in acknowledgement, making his way over towards a locked cabinet. "Kira, you mind if I grab some things for tonight?"

She shrugged. "You know the code," she replied, gesturing vaguely to the sheet that hung on the wall next to the cabinet, "just make sure to make a note of what you take."

He nodded in agreement, punching in a six-digit code before the metal door swung open, allowing him to reach inside and take what he needed. "So," he said, glancing towards me for a moment as he adjusted everything to fit into the belt around his waist, "what were you guys talking about before I barged in."

I looked towards Kira for a quick second to see a blank expression on her face, and it wasn't hard to infer that she wasn't keen to continue our conversation with Finn listening in. "Oh nothing," I replied after a short pause. "You know, girl talk."

Finn quirked an eyebrow as he cast his gaze between the two of us. It was clear he didn't believe the words that'd left my lips, but he didn't push, instead turning his back to us as he wrote down what he'd taken from the storage cabinet. "Have you spoken to your mom yet?" he asked as he locked up the cabinet, changing the subject entirely as he directed his question towards me.

I shook my head, stopping when I realized that, with his back turned, he couldn't see it. "No," I trailed, moving my fingers in a figure eight pattern on the surface of the table, "it's still weird to think of her like that."

Finn turned to face me, leaning back against the cabinet as he crossed his arms across his chest. "It was a pretty big shock to everyone, I think," he replied, "realizing that the Head of the Division had a child. We've all had time to digest it though; you haven't, so it makes sense that you're still adjusting."

"Every time someone mentions that she's my mom, I just keep thinking that my mom – the one I knew, died when I was eight," I admitted, the confession falling from my lips easily as I shrugged my shoulders. "I guess it's just going to take some time," I trailed, his words looping through my mind. "Hopefully in a few weeks I'll be able to talk to her about it."

I saw Kira nod as she finished off her work, but Finn simply shrugged his shoulders. "I mean, you can't really put a time limit on these things," he replied, walking towards me until he reached the other side of the table I sat at. "It took me a few months to get used to the idea."

"A few months?" I repeated with confusion, my eyebrows drawing together. "But Beckett said..." I trailed off, my eyes widening as I came to a sudden realization. "You were one of the agent watching out for me?"

His lips drew upwards lazily. "Guilty."

"So you knew who I was that first day in the cafeteria," I stated, and when he nodded in confirmation, I shook my head in disbelief. "Why didn't you tell me?"

He raised one shoulder, the smile not wavering from his lips. "Didn't think it was all that important."

"Sure it was," I replied, a light laugh escaping my mouth as I reached over and aimed a soft punch towards his shoulder, "I could've thanked you."

"I haven't seen you thank any of the other agents on your case. Even Beckett." Raising an eyebrow challengingly, I stayed quiet, smiling sheepishly because he was right. While I didn't know exactly which agents had been watching out for me, I certainly hadn't thought to thank Beckett. Instead, I'd had a constant feeling of anger and irritation towards him because he'd been the one to bring me here – that is, up until recently. "But I'll accept the thank you now if you're giving it, and I would say you're welcome, but it's kind of part of my job."

I rolled my eyes at his cheeky reply.

"But anyways," he trailed, pushing back from the table in a way that caused the arms of his t-shirt to tighten around his muscles, "I'd better get going. I have to meet up with my partner for tonight's assignment." He winked, his smile still gleaming. "More damsel's in distress to protect."

"I'll see you later," I said, shaking my head in amusement as I watched him leave, and when the door shut behind him, I turned to Kira. "Is he always that... that..."

"Happy?"

That was the simplest way to explain it, but failing to find another word, I nodded, letting a laugh escape. "Yeah."

"Ever since I met him," she affirmed, taking off her gloves and safety glasses. She moved to sit with me as she let the solution she had finished set. "But I know that he hasn't always had the easiest time."

"What do you mean?"

"I've never talked to him about it directly," she trailed, pausing for a short moment, "but it's pretty common knowledge that his parents both died while out on an assignment a while back." I felt a pull in my chest as the corners of my lips turned downwards. "When S.I.C.O agents have children, it's common for them to either be put up for adoption or be sent to live with another family member if the agents don't retire, but his parents were one of the few who tried to build a life outside of the Division."

A small part of me was conflicted, knowing that my mom wasn't the only one who put her child up for adoption, but the rest of me was more focused on listening to what Kira had to say.

"He doesn't talk about his past, but I think he was thirteen or fourteen when he was brought into the Division the night of his parent's funeral," she explained, "and from what I've heard, he started his training as one of the rare teenage agents relatively quickly. I'm pretty sure him and Beckett even trained together for a while, because at the time, they were the only ones young enough that still had to earn a high school diploma."

"Do you know why they don't get along then?" I asked, the question immediately falling into my head. Just knowing about both of their pasts, the similarities were evident, and while I could easily imagine the two of them becoming friends as they grew up together inside these walls, they seemed as though they could hardly stand the sight of one another. But I knew there was something more to it.

"You've noticed that too?" she mused.

"The sneers, the narrowed gazes, and the general avoidance? Yeah, I've noticed."

"Honestly," she continued, "I don't really think anyone knows exactly why they don't get along. I've been here for almost four years and I've never heard anybody bring it up. It's like it's taboo."

"Seriously?" I asked in astonishment, thinking that at least one person within the Division must know what went down between the two of them. Someone besides the men in question.

She nodded. "I couldn't tell you if something happened between them or if they just never got along, because I don't know," Kira explained, "but whatever it is, I'm guessing that's why they're complete opposites – one of them ice cold and the other burning with energy."

Even though I'd spent numerous hours with them both, and had come to accept that they had different ways of approaching the tasks they were given, I hadn't exactly realized how much their personalities clashed. Kira was right. Beckett liked to keep to himself – a strong and silent type, while Finn was fun-loving, outgoing, and appeared to get along with almost everyone.

When I didn't respond, stuck in my own thoughts, Kira shrugged her shoulders, her lips pulling upwards tepidly. "The longer you're here, the more you'll realize that everyone has some kind of story that they keep to themselves," she said, not only referring to Beckett and Finn, but to what she'd shared with me as well. "Whether it's something that they're holding onto from the life they lived before S.I.C.O– be it good or bad, or something that changed their perspective on the way their life is now, it's a way to stay grounded and stay true to yourself amongst the craziness."

a/n: I threw a lot of small revelations into this chapter, as well as set up some future storylines, so hopefully you guys all liked it! Remember to leave your comments below and vote if you're enjoying this story so far! And while you guys wait patiently for the next chapter, any guesses as to what's going to happen next?