Title: Timber Man: Volume 1
Author: bosandaros
Reviewer: sassy-weirdo

Review: 

Presentation:

Cover (4.5/5)

The cover is minimalistic and shows that the story is set in a forest. The title and author's name is legible but, I would suggest darkening the word 'timber' to make it easier to understand or read. Nonetheless this cover is beautiful and if I were a reader on Wattpad I would definitely want to click it to read the blurb.

Title (5/5)

The title gives off encyclopedia vibes with the whole 'Volume 1' thing but I like it. It just seems to carry a lot of weight in those two words. Kudos to you!

Blurb (2/5)

At first glance the blurb seems too short. It seems like a summary which is very different from a blurb. A blurb is supposed to hook people while a summary is just a precise version of the story. Your blurb just gives us a bit of information on Tim and that's it. A blurb is kind of like a thriller, if it gives the reader enough thrill then they will probably want to read the story, but if it doesn't... well, I'm not quite sure about it. Thus, I suggest rewriting your blurb and to give hints about the plot but not give all of it away for a story is nothing without a plot. And a blurb reflects the story, thus giving hints about the plot is important.

Uncovering the Story:

First (Chapter) Impression (9/10)

Entry (10/10)

Short, precise and loaded with sarcasm. The diary entry was to the point and gave us enough information. It can even be called a mini prologue and I have no words to say save for the fact that your readers can automatically reflect from the chapter that the story will be filled with sarcastic comments and adventure. Not to mention, your grammar is great— simple sentences and correct punctuations, just as it should be for an entry. I understand that the genre of your story is that of Fantasy and although the diary entry doesn't show as much, we shall see it in the upcoming chapters.

Prologue (8/10)

The prologue is descriptive and though it has a few minor grammatical errors, overall it is fine. But, I was extremely confused at the ending since Tim was a prisoner and in no way could he have had access to a room key. Also, what does the diary entry signify? These questions ran in my head as I read the prologue. The grammatical errors will be addressed in the part labeled 'Writing Style, Grammar, and Vocabulary'.

Character Development (9/10)

Tim: We see the power Tim has and the way he acts around Fiona portrays that he has brotherly feelings for her. The way he swatted her hand away or told her to stay inside because he was scared for her is sweet, in its own way. And giving the character a mysterious effect, albeit a small one which continues to itch me to know more was quite efficient since now I cannot stop thinking how he came to wish for the floaties. Not to mention, the fondness he has towards those small puffballs is so endearing. I can just imagine him as a kind and caring man.

Fiona: I absolutely love Fiona's banter with Tim! It's just so relatable (since every set of siblings has it more or less xD) and the way Tim teased her and her reaction to it just flashes 'like a sister' to me. I do not know much about Fiona but from what I do know I can discern that she's just like Tim- kind, sweet and caring. The way she played with the puffball and her sadness when she thought her new friend was dying just proved how easily she trusts people.

Writing Style, Grammar, and Vocabulary (9.5/10)

Your story has almost spot on grammar, which is amazing since very few books on Wattpad are like yours (grammar-wise). When I read your story I probably sighed a dozen times with relief that this would not be another of those typical Wattpad books which have absolutely no head or tail of grammar. Albeit this I found a few mistakes which I'll be listing down so as to make it easier for you to edit and look out for the mistakes while writing new chapters-

In the prologue:

Excerpt: 'He tried to stand, but his limbs froze, feeling heavy as bricks like hard reality as... uselessly.'

Hard reality? I'm not quite sure what that means. Plus it kind of sounds weird so I suggest using some other phrase to enhance the sentence.

Excerpt: 'There was nothing to get amped up over This had to be a delusion.'

Corrected excerpt: 'There was nothing to get amped up over. This had to be a delusion.'

Or

Corrected excerpt: 'There was nothing to get amped up over— This had to be a delusion.'

I'm sure the missing punctuation (you can either use a full stop or an em dash) between 'over' and 'This' was a typo but wanted to point it out just in case ^^

Excerpt: '... whispered deathly quiet...'

A whisper in itself is quite quiet so stating that a whisper is deathly quiet doesn't quite make sense to me.

In chapter 1:

The word 'logs' has been repeated 6696324345688984245567687 times. Just kidding, but you get it. The word has been repeated quite a lot of times. You can use synonyms like timber, wood etc.

I love your writing style! The descriptions in your story are fabulous and much like your flawless grammar, your writing style is quite rare to see too on a site like Wattpad, since people usually use straightforward sentences. I adore how you use metaphors and other figures of speech to enhance your sentences instead of just being frank. And your vocabulary is vast. I could see synonyms and new words all over the place (well, maybe except for 'logs' xD), so kudos to you on that!

Plot and Pacing (9/10)

The pacing is quite good— not too slow, not too fast. Just the right pace for a fantasy story. But, the plot is quite well written and understandable too. The only thing that concerns me about it is the fact that Tim has the power of botanokinesis but how does manipulating a wooden coffee table make it turn into an ax? Where does the blade come from?

Genre Relevance (5/5)

I can totally understand that the story is part of the fantasy genre.

Communication with Readers (3.5/5)

I understand how difficult it is to answer all the comments but answering some of the comments sometimes helps readers feel connected with the author which is what most readers wish.

Overall Enjoyment (4/5)

Overall, the story is very enrapturing and I cannot wait to continue the journey of the great Tim Burman and Fiona the cacti. Not to mention, find out more about the diary and Tim's wish.

Overall: 56.5/70