Joy's POV

As soon as I stepped into the school I knew something was up. I scrolled through Annabelle's phone looking at the meme she wanted to show while she admired German men with my phone.

“Would you look at that? The hoe actually has the audacity to come to school.”

I turned to look at Tiffany who was smiling as she pointed towards me. I stared in shock wondering what I could have done to her.

“Girl actually did it with Blake while even forming a good girl in school.” Michelle sneered.

My heart stopped.

“You can never trust these Nigerian girls. Just a bunch of sluts.”

My heart was boiling and I wanted to so desperately slap Tiffany but my heart was shaking and so was the rest of my body.

“Does everybody know?”

“Yeah. Even her parents know.”

I turned to look at who had said that, but I couldn’t locate the people in the crowd that was forming in the middle of the hallway. Annabelle immediately pushed me behind her and stared at Tiffany.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Annabelle said

Tiffany let out an evil laugh. “So the virgin didn’t tell you? She and Blake had such a wonderful time in his house last night.”

“Boy completely narrated everything that happened in such great detail,” Michelle added.

Annabelle turned to look at me in shock but turned back to face Tiffany with a furious face. The entire senior class was in the hallway murmuring about me and I felt like I couldn’t breathe amid their judgemental stares.

“Do you mind shutting up?” Annabelle said angrily.

“Look at who’s talking. I’d like to see you shut your trap for once.” Michelle said.

I stood silently at the back fiddling with my fingers, and looking nervously from Annabelle to Tiffany.

Why was I so weak

And before anyone knew what was happening, Annabelle lunged at Tiffany and started to pluck out her hair extensions. Tiffany let out a piercing scream and her boyfriend immediately rushed over and slapped Annabelle, who recoiled from the shock.

My heart was pounding and I could feel tears coming down from my face.

Stop. Please just stop!!!!

The room was spinning, Jayden was in the fight now, punching Tiffany’s boyfriend. My chest contracted harshly and breathing became difficult. Jayden who had been trying so hard to keep calm was now resorting to violence and it was all because of me. And it seemed the whole school agreed. Poor Weak Naïve Little Joy slept with a boy.

I was crying now and in the midst of my sobs, I could hear someone groan in frustration.

I guess I’m not the only one who hates me.

Annabelle whose upper lip was bruised badly was trying so hard to grab Jayden away from the boy who was obviously getting beaten. They were too busy in the fight that they didn’t even notice when I turned and ran away.

People were always getting hurt because of me. First, Astro, and now Jayden and Annabelle.

I stumbled out the door and crashed into someone.

It’s Blake he can sort it out. He can tell them it's not true.

“B-B-Blake, they are saying I slept with you.” My voice came out with a sob as I remembered something I heard in passing.

Even her parents know

My heart clenched even tighter and I sat down trying to catch my bearings. I stared up at him but he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"I'm sorry Joy. I didn't think Tiffany would take it this far." Blake said.

My heart dropped.

"What do you mean?" I said getting up and grabbing him.

"I had to Joy." He said looking up at me now.

I was trembling violently. "You could have said the truth, Blake. You could have told them I didn't fucking sleep with you."

He laughed sadly. "Tell them that I was rejected." His eyes burned with desperation. "And have them mock me that I couldn't sleep with you, have them make me a laughing stock. I will NEVER allow that."

I moved away from him. "B-b-but-"

He cut me off violently. "But what Joy? The world isn't all good. You just wouldn't understand."

I blew. "NO BLAKE, YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!!!” I screamed. “I have to be perfect. I’m the oldest, I’m supposed to be smart, diligent, and n-n-never ever be caught wanting.”

The tears I had managed to tame broke loose again and I felt the salt on my lips.

“No one would have even cared if you hadn’t been such a prude.” He muttered.

"No one would have cared if you didn't lie." I said desperately.

I looked at him begging to be saved. Just one word from him would instantly calm this raging storm. But his eyes showed me I wouldn't be receiving such mercy today.

I pushed passed him with tears blurring my eyes, he grabbed my arm but I yanked it away.

He laughed and put his hand on his head. “I guess this what I get for being nice - a lonely little girl with an identity crisis who was afraid of being a third wheel.”

I froze then spoke. “Fuck you, Blake Harrison.”

I turned briefly to see his watering eyes but I didn't care, I turned and continued walking making sure my steps were poised. But as soon as I had gone out of his sight I started to run until I had reached my neighborhood I started harshly rubbing my eyes that were still dripping tears as I walked to my house. A few women from church passed me by and I greeted them but they ignored me.

“That’s the girl I was telling you about. You know the one that sleeps around.”

“I feel sorry for her parents.”

I angrily stomped off, I didn’t even sleep with Blake not to mention with countless other boys. I was on my steps now and I heaved a deep sigh while muttering a prayer, hoping my parents would hear me out. My hand grabbed the door knob and I silently opened the door but didn’t go inside because I could hear quiet little sobs from the living room.

"That girl has killed me."

I silently closed the door and walked off towards the park.

I went towards the park and went to the lake and sank down beside a tree. My eyes met the deep blue lake and I suddenly wondered how deep it was. I shook my head violently,

I shouldn’t be having these kinds of thoughts. People go through far worse and still don’t think like this.

That’s because you're weak and pathetic.

My mind went silent trying desperately to find an answer to why I wasn’t weak. I tried so hard to tell myself that I was strong, loved, and didn’t need any validation from the outside. So why wasn’t it working? Why wasn’t I getting up from these endless punches and the burden I bear? Why wasn’t I getting up to take my vengeance like a badass female lead? Instead, all that came to mind were scenes of my weakest moments, my mother crying and my friends getting hurt because of me.

Droplets of rain fell from the sky and immediately people started to scatter, moving everywhere. I dragged myself up, desperate to get away from that lake that seemed to want to embrace me. I trudged along to a point where people were hosting picnics but were now rushing to pack up. I suddenly turned back to face that lake again. It really seemed to want to hug me.

I need to talk to someone

I remove the phone from my pocket and stare down at it. I was still with Annabelle’s phone. I immediately dial Astro but he doesn’t pick up. I scroll through the contacts, my fingers sliding clumsily on the screen and sobs racking my chest.

I finally reach the contact I need – Karla. I turn to stare at the lake and put the ringing phone to my ear. So I stood smack in the middle of the chaos as people passed me by, some turning but never coming close. I close my eyes and feel the raindrops on my crying face, glad that no one can see me but silently hoping for someone to save me.

******************************

AN

Hiiiiiiii everyone,

Hope you guys liked the chapter? Comment your thoughts. vote, and share the story please. And by the way don't be shy to point out errors if there are any.

Thanks