Dear Diary,

I don't know what the hell is wrong with him?! It's been weeks eversince nagparamdam si Samuel and this never happened before. We never failed to inform each other if ever na hindi kami makakalaan ng time sa isa't isa and we are both mature already so we respect each other's time.

But lately, it seems like he is avoiding me and it doesn't sit well with me.

Pinipilit kong alalahanin kung ano ang nagawa kong mali para gawin niya 'to pero wala akong maalala. I mean, is it really that hard to send a single message?

Kahit isa lang?

Alam mo Diary, dahil sa ginagawa niya, hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili kong mangamba. I've known Samuel eversince highschool, and the idea of him , cheating, never crossed my mind. Pero dahil sa mga ginagawa niya hindi ko mapigilan ang utak ko sa kakawhat-if.

What if pagod na siya?

What if ayaw niya na?

What if may iba na?

Pero what if busy lang siya?

Natatakot akong mawala si Samuel. I mean, we've been together for almost ten years, and our tenth anniversary happened yesterday yet wala akong narinig sa kanya kahit niha o niho.

Sinanay niya na ako na nandiyan siya palagi. Everytime I cry, he's always there to wipe my tears away. Everytime I laugh, he is the reason. And everytime I have a hard time, he is always there to lend me a hand. Now tell me how the fuck would I go on without him by my side?

Rich and Kandra kept on saying that our relationship is getting toxic. And I don't want to admit it but I know, I know. And it is the truth that I'm trying so hard not to confront.

Rich and Kandra always tried to convince me to break up with him but I can't. A life without him is something easier said than done.

After writing this, I will try to reach him again. Cause right now, I think that's the only that I can do.

Nangangamba,
Kryiella