Epiphany & A Little Priest
Later that day, the humanized Mane Six and Spike made their way through the streets of London in search of the Old Bailey Courthouse. This very courthouse was where Judge Turpin presided over, the place where he dispensed his version of justice. After their talk with Sweeney Todd, who agreed to help hide Johanna, they carried forth on Anthony's plan. As for the young boy in question, he returned to the Turpin estate to see Johanna to make sure she'd be ready to leave with him later.
In the meantime, the girls and Spike volunteered to spy on Turpin to make sure he stayed away from home in the meantime. Which led to their eventual finding of Old Bailey. They couldn't help but gape over how large and intimidating the courthouse looked judging by the exterior alone.
"This is just the kind of place you'd imagine a heartless blowhard like Turpin would be," Rainbow Dash remarked. "This place gives me the creeps!"
"Certainly not a Hall of Justice if you ask me," Rarity agreed. "Not to mention it's completely out of date. Could stand to use new paint, maybe some marble buffing, or even..."
"Not the time, Rarity!" Applejack interrupted. "We gotta make sure Turpin don't head on back tah the house till Anthony and Johanna leave."
"How are we going to do this?" Fluttershy asked meekly. "Turpin doesn't exactly like us at all; we can't just strike a conversation with him for a few hours."
"It doesn't matter what we do," Twilight Sparkle spoke up. "We need to keep him as far away from his house for a while."
"What are we supposed to do at the moment?" Spike asked.
"We keep a close eye on the judge and track his every move. We'll have to sneak into the courthouse and keep him in sight at all times."
"Well, let's stop wasting time and get in there!" Rainbow replied.
Twilight held out her hands and the group grabbed hands forming a circle. She used her magic to teleport them inside the building. Thankfully, the interior was hardly well lit, leaving their entry shrouded in darkness. Once inside, the group silently slinked through the halls until they came upon a large courtroom. And it was there where Judge Turpin himself lurked over the proceedings.
Turpin sat upon his podium, the personification of power, very high at the bench. He was dressed in a black robe and powdered white wig. He glared down toward the accused stand where a wasted wretch of a boy no older than ten years old stood. Beadle Bamford stood at the foot of the podium, closest to the boy, with many other members of the grand jury around and about. Before the stunned gaze of the group, this boy was currently on trial.
"Is that a kid?" Applejack whispered horrified. "Why is he on trial?"
"This is the second time, sir, that you have been brought before this bench," Turpin announced to the boy. "Though it is my earnest wish to ever temper justice with mercy, your persistent dedication to a life of crime is an abomination before God and man."
"Are you serious?!" Rainbow whispered harshly. "He's a kid! I bet the only bad thing he's probably done is steal a loaf of bread!"
"I therefore sentence you to hang by the neck until you are dead, and may the lord have mercy on your soul," Turpin declared, banging his gavel. "This court is adjourned!"
The wretched boy collapsed in sobs. The Beadle was pleased with the verdict as a couple guards quickly came forth to remove him from the bench. The remainder of the court began to file out, among them the Judge himself. The Mane Six and Spike looked on with shock and disbelief from the sentence Turpin delivered.
"Why that no good, slimy, rotten, mother-bucker!" Rainbow whispered harshly.
"Ah outta run in there and buck him so hard he explodes into a million pieces here and now!" Applejack growled lowly.
"We can't let that poor boy get hanged!" Fluttershy cried tearfully.
"Trust me Flutters, we won't!" Rainbow voiced determination. "Wait here!"
"I'm with ya hon!" Applejack replied.
Both the tomboy Pegasus and her southern belle marefriend quickly snuck their way through the halls of the courthouse once more. Thankfully, most of the judges and jurors present were too preoccupied to notice them sneaking about. Rounding a nearby corner, they spotted the two guards escorting the sniveling boy through the halls and the sight made their blood boil. Quickly as possible, they snuck behind the guards and delivered two of the biggest, strongest blows that sent the guards flying toward a nearby wall, knocking them out cold. The frightened boy turned behind him and eyed his saviors with confusion.
"Who're you?" The boy asked timidly. "What're you doin' 'ere?"
"No time to explain, kid," Rainbow replied. "You must get out of here now and get as far away as possible before anyone notices you're gone."
Applejack then reached into the hem of her dress and pulled out a bag of bits, which she handed to the boy.
"Take this and get on a train or wutever tah get far away from here," Applejack instructed. "Go, live yer life, and stay outta trouble, ya hear?"
The boy looked down at the tiny bag in his hand, then toward the two girls. Tears fell from his face as he smiled.
"Thank yer, thank yer both," He said gratefully. "Yer both the personification of kindness yer are."
"Just go!" Rainbow ordered.
The kid quickly made a mad dash down the hall toward the nearest door. The two women watched the runaway, hoping to Celestia that he'd be alright.
<>
Shortly after freeing the young boy from the fate of the hangman's noose, Applejack & Rainbow Dash reunited with the girls and Spike. By now, they had teleported themselves outside the building just as the Judge and the Beadle walked away from the impressive edifices of the Old Bailey. Spotting the approaching figures, the group quickly hid behind a nearby wall and poked their heads out to observe the pair of evil men.
"Thank you, your Honor," Beadle thanked Turpin gratefully. "Just the sentence we wanted."
"Was he guilty?" Turpin replied.
"Well, if he didn't do it, he's surely done something to warrant a hanging."
"What man has not?" Turpin muttered under his breath.
"Sir?" Beadle questioned.
"No matter," Turpin brushed off. "Come, walk home with me."
The men made their way off the grounds of the Old Bailey down a nearby street. The Mane Six and Spike quickly followed behind, keeping a decent distance so as not to be seen by their targets.
"I have news for you, my friend," Turpin spoke, mid-walk. "In order to shield her from the evils of this world, I have decided to marry my dear Johanna."
Even at a distance, the announcement shocked the whole group beyond disgust. They couldn't believe the very words coming from the old man's mouth.
"Girls... did he really just say that?" Spike asked, disgusted.
"Afraid so, Spike," Twilight nodded.
"But he's like old enough to be her grandfather!" Rainbow cringed.
"The thought of it's enough to make you vomit," Rarity gagged.
"Ah, sir, happy news indeed," Beadle said joyfully.
"Strange, though, when I offered myself to her, she showed a certain... reluctance," Turpin voiced confusion.
"I wonder why," Spike voiced sarcasm. "He's probably the worst bachelor in the entire city."
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The Beadle proceeded with exquisite and obsequious delicacy:
Beadle (Sings):
Excuse me, my lord,
May I request, my lord,
Permission, my lord, to speak?
Forgive me if I suggest, my lord,
You're looking less than your best, my lord,
There's powder upon your vest, my lord.
And stubble upon your cheek,
And ladies, my lord, are weak.
As they rounded the corner, the Judge brushed his chin to confirm the Beadle's word. When even that wasn't enough, he examined his appearance from the reflection of the nearest window.
"Stubble, you say?" Turpin asked. "Perhaps at times I am a little overhasty with my morning ablutions..."
Beadle (Sings cheerfully):
Fret not though, my lord,
I know a place, my lord,
A barber, my lord, of skill.
Thus armed with a shaven face, my lord,
Some eau de cologne to brace my lord
And musk to enhance the chase, my lord,
You'll dazzle the girl until—
"Until?" Turpin questioned.
Beadle (Sings):
She bows to your every will.
"A barber, eh?" Turpin pondered with intrigue. "Take me to him."
"I am honored, my lord," Beadle nodded. "His name is Todd... Sweeney Todd. And he is the very last word in barberin'."
The two men head off, strolling down the road toward Fleet Street. The Mane Six and Spike emerged from hiding, staring at them along the way.
"Can you believe that guy?" Rainbow asked in disbelief. "I mean it's bad enough he keeps Johanna locked up all day. Now he wants to marry her?!"
"Just when we think that no good varmint can't get no worse!" Applejack spoke in irritation.
"We can't let that happen!" Rarity voiced determination.
"And we won't," Twilight replied. "He's going to Mr. Todd's for a shave. This gives us time to get back to his house and get Johanna out. If we leave now, we'll have her gone before he gets back. Come on!"
Every pony, and Spike, nodded in agreement and raced down the street in the opposite direction toward Turpin's house. They knew they needed to work fast if they hoped to get Johanna out of the house. For should Turpin return from the barbershop earlier than planned... may Celestia have mercy upon their souls.
<>
Back on Fleet Street, inside the pie shop, Mrs. Lovett kept Toby entertained. The boy himself was blissfully unaware of whatever horror had befallen his master. In that moment, the two sat around the table as Mrs. Lovett poured Toby a glass of gin... not his first. Many may think it wasn't wise for a boy so young to be drinking, but such was a commonplace in Victorian London (Especially regarding child labor).
The boy gulped down the gin between ravenous bites of another meat pie. All the while, Mrs. Lovett nervously glanced up at the ceiling, by now hearing it was quiet. She couldn't help but wonder what the hell was going on up there and what her two cohorts were up to.
"You ought to slow down a bit, lad," Mrs. Lovett strongly advised. "It'll go straight to your head."
"Weaned on the stuff, I was," Toby replied, slightly slurred. "They used to give it to us at the workhouse, so's we could sleep. Not that you'd ever want to sleep in that place, ma'am. Not with the things wot happen in the dark."
"That's nice, dear..." Mrs. Lovett answered, getting to her feet. "I think I'll just pop in on Mr. Todd for a tick. You'll be all right here?"
"Leave the bottle," Toby requested.
Mrs. Lovett merely gave a roll of her eyes, but otherwise didn't object. Against her better judgment, she left the bottle of gin on the table for the boy as she departed from the shop.
<>
In the barber shop just upstairs, Chrysalis and Sweeney Todd were cleaning the mess made not too long ago. The memory of what happened was still fresh in their minds, not to mention the adrenaline still running over the entire ordeal. Sweeney had cleaned off his blade, while Chrysalis mopped the leftover blood off the floor.
"That's the last of the blood," She commented. "And nothing left on the windows."
"For now," Sweeney replied casually.
It was then that the door swung open with a bell chime. Mrs. Lovett entered the shop as Todd methodically cleaned his razor.
"Gawd, the lad is drinking me out of house and home," Lovett sighed in annoyance. "How long until Pirelli gets back?"
Sweeney merely turned around as he cleaned his razor, fresh blood still on the sleeve of his arm.
"He won't be back," Todd said menacingly.
"Not now... or ever again," Chrysalis added.
Mrs. Lovett gasped loudly, noticing the blood on Sweeney's arm.
"Mr. T., you didn't!" She gasped, instantly suspicious.
"Don't believe us?" Chrysalis questioned. "Check the chest."
Chrysalis casually pointed one hand toward the chest. Mrs. Lovett quickly made her way over to throw the lid open. One peek inside, and she quickly slammed it shut spinning toward the pair. Horror was plastered on her face upon seeing the remains of Pirelli at the bottom of that chest.
"You're barking mad!" Mrs. Lovett whispered in shock. "Both of you! Killing a man wot done you no harm."
"He recognized me from the old days," Sweeney explained nonchalantly. "Tried to blackmail me – half my earnings."
"And he tried to sway me into abandoning Mr. Todd to work for him," Chrysalis added. "He wanted to me to sleep with him to prove my loyalty."
"Oh well, that's a different matter!" Mrs. Lovett sighed in relief. "For a moment there I thought you two lost your marbles."
She pulled the chest open once more, staring at the bloody corpse lying within.
"Ooooh! All that blood!" She shook her head. "Enough to make you come all over gooseflesh, ain't it? Poor bugger. Oh, well."
Mrs. Lovett started to close the chest, but then had an idea. She reached in and rummaged around the bloodied pockets of the dead man. Eventually, she pulled out Pirelli's chatelaine purse and opened it to reveal its contents.
"Three quid! Well, waste not, want not, I always say..."
She tucked the purse into her dress and slammed the lid of the chest once more.
"Now this presents us with a new challenge," Chrysalis spoke up. "What are we going to do about the boy?"
Sweeney stared at his razor, completely lost in thought over the blood he'd spilled. And yet... there was so much more he could do. So, why stop there?
"Send him up," Todd replied.
Mrs. Lovett snapped her head in his direction, the concern as plain as the nose on her face.
"Oh, we don't need to worry about him," Lovett implored. "He's a simple thing. I'll pawn him off with some story."
"Send him up, woman!" Sweeney demanded coldly.
"I agree with Mr. Todd," Chrysalis vouched for him. "We let the boy live, he'll tell the next person he meets that he showed up here with Pirelli. Word will get out and people will wonder where he is. And eventually, they'll realize he was last seen here before he went missing. When the police put two-and-two together, it's off to jail with us."
But even with the threat of imprisonment, or worse, the last thing Mrs. Lovett wanted was any harm to come to a boy so young. Acting quickly, Mrs. Lovett threw in a new idea.
"Now, Mr. T., surely one's enough for today," Lovett replied. "Don't want to indulge yourself, after all... 'Sides, I was thinking about hiring a lad to help around the shop, me poor knees not being what they used to be."
Sweeney thought about this idea for a moment. On one hand, killing the boy could put an end to their troubles here and now. Then again, if anyone knew the two at all, they'd come looking for him. Keeping the boy to work in the shop could possibly buy his loyalty and he'll forget about Pirelli altogether. With a sigh, Todd moved to his familiar post by the window.
"Alright," Sweeney replied. "Anything you say."
"Mark my words you two," Chrysalis warned. "Keeping that boy here is the worst idea you can think of. If this blows up in our faces, don't say I didn't warn you."
"'Course we'll have to stock up on the gin," Mrs. Lovett suggested. "The boy drinks like a Barbary sailor—"
But Sweeney Todd paid her no heed. He stood by the nearby window, looking out toward the streets below. Suddenly, as Todd looked out the window, his expression widened. Todd gasped – a great, shocking intake of breath as his whole body tensed like iron – Mrs. Lovett spun to him and turned toward his direction.
Emerging down the street, from the alleyway across the street, were two men. One was the Beadle pointing his cane at the Bakery and the other... the other was the very man Todd refused to forget his entire life.
"The Judge!" Todd gasped.
Chrysalis curiously approached the window just in time to see all the activity below. Sure enough, they could see the Judge and the Beadle approaching. She could see the men were exchanging a few words and at first glance they appeared to be nothing more than simple stuffy residents of this industrious city.
"Is that him?" Chrysalis asked.
The disguised changeling caught a glare from Todd, one filled with fire and brimstone in a cauldron boiling with blood. Much to her own surprise, she backed down, which was a big deal for her.
"I have not forgotten his face for years," Todd whispered, eyes blazing. "Not since the day he sent me away and took my wife and daughter for his own."
It was then Chrysalis caught the shining glint in Todd's trusted razor. The burning anger within his eyes reflected ever so fiercely. It was all coming together.
'It's not justice he wants... it's revenge,' Chrysalis realized. 'Revenge for something that was... unjustly stolen from him.'
"Get out," Todd commanded, almost in a whisper.
Todd turned around toward the two women, who didn't move.
"Get out!" He shouted.
Mrs. Lovett gave him a quick kiss then very quickly left the room, realizing what Todd yearned to accomplish. Chrysalis turned to leave as well, until...
"Wait!"
Chrysalis stopped and turned toward Todd, who prepared himself.
"You stay," Todd instructed simply.
Chrysalis merely nodded her head as Todd turned from the window and looked around the shop, shifting nervously. Now that his great moment of revenge was at hand, he didn't quite know what to do with himself. Todd moved toward the mirror desk in the room, his large razor in hand. He coiled by the door, prepared to kill the judge as soon as he walked into the room.
No... Todd realized how much he wanted to savor this moment. He quickly moved and put the razor down, deciding a different approach was in order. He'd give the man a shave, so as to savor the taste of having the man at his every whim. And when his guard was down, Todd would kill him. He looked toward the mirror, realizing his sleeve was still stained with the blood of Pirelli. He went over and put on his jacket.
"I'm going to kill him," Todd declared. "I'm going to have my revenge."
The very sound of the notion gave a notorious glint in Chrysalis' eyes. After all, she herself dreamed of enacting her own personal revenge.
"Opportunity knocks," She replied, with a growing smirk. "So, how are you going to kill him?"
"I won't kill him right away," Todd replied. "No, I want to savor the moment, have him at my mercy, let my misery and memories of my hate for him drive my every move."
The changeling was in total bliss at the very words this barber was telling her; it was like her very dreams were about to come true.
"I need you to help me make him feel comfortable," Todd declared, straightening his coat.
"Let me guess," The woman licked her lips. "Because I am a woman, a pretty woman at that, you believe that is the key."
"Yes," Todd nodded, lost in thought. "Every man in this world wants nothing more than a pretty woman... they are willing to do anything to get their dirty hands on one."
Something about the darkness on the barber's face, especially his eyes, rubbed the changeling off. It wasn't like she knew nothing of darkness. After all, one of her colleagues was the literal embodiment of darkness and shadows, the definition of unsanctioned evil. But perhaps it was something about Todd's motivations. No, that couldn't be right. Every one of her Equestrian colleagues, Chrysalis included, were all motivated by revenge. But if that wasn't it...
'What are you hoping to accomplish, Mr. Todd?' Chrysalis pondered to herself.
Finally, Sweeney Todd stood. All his demons settled into a bizarre form of calmness. They could hear the Judge's footsteps climbing the stairs. And then, the door opened, and in walked none other than Judge Turpin. Chrysalis stepped back, noting Todd's urge to hide the change in his demeanor. She eyed the man up and down, sizing him up. His appearance reeked of slime and arrogance, as if he wanted people to hate him right at the moment. But his attention was not on Chrysalis, but toward the barber.
"Mr. Todd?" The Judge presumed.
The man's voice was very oily, as if it was permeating like a stream through her bloodstream freezing it to the touch. Todd himself slowly turned to face the Judge, like seeing a familiar face for the first time.
"At your service..." Todd 'politely' greeted the judge. "An honor to receive your patronage, my lord."
"You know me, sir?"
Todd gave a polite bow, though Chrysalis could sense and feel the bleeding hatred between the lines.
"Who in this wide world is not familiar with the honored Judge Turpin?"
The Judge grunted and glanced around the shop with a raised brow. No doubt there was disgust in his glance, eyeing the facility up and down. Specifically, the wooden rafters as opposed to the clean marble he was so used to. To him, it was a perfect reflection of the low end society residing in Fleet Street.
"These premises are hardly prepossessing and yet the Beadle tells me you are the most accomplished of all the barbers in the city," Turpin finally said.
"That is gracious of him, sir..." Todd replied.
The man turned his head to Chrysalis, nodding to the Judge. Immediately, Chrysalis knew what he wanted of her, and it sickened her just to be in proximity with Turpin. Even if she were a Siren, like the three stooges who make the order, she wouldn't wany anything to do with him. Grumbling, she obliged, approaching the man to remove his coat.
"... Sir, if you please, sir," Chrysalis indicated for the Judge to sit. "Sit."
As expected, the grimy eyes of the Judge looked at her. She could feel him undressing her with his eyes.
"Pardon my assistant," Todd replied, as she walked away. "And what may I do for you today, sir? A stylish trimming of the hair? A soothing skin massage?"
As Chrysalis hung the Judge's coat, she could still feel the Judge looking at her.
'Disgusting man,' She thought to herself. 'He deserves whatever Todd gives him.'
Finally, as the Judge took his seat in the chair, he began to sing. He sung of desire to be presentable in apparel, all to satisfy the love of someone unnamed to them.
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Judge Turpin (Sings):
You see, sir, a man infatuate with love,
Her ardent and eager slave.
So, fetch the pomade and pumice stone
And lend me a more seductive tone,
A sprinkling perhaps of French cologne,
But first, sir, I think – a shave.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
The closest I ever gave.
The Judge loosened his ascot and collar, as he sat in the chair. Todd whipped a sheet over the Judge, then tucked the bib in. The Judge hummed, flicking imaginary dust off the sheet; Todd whistled gaily, the burning eyes into the man growing brighter.
"You're in a merry mood today, Mr. Todd," Turping noticed.
The barber merely carried on, picking up the next verse as he mixed the shaving lather.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
'Tis your delight, sir, catching fire
From one man to the next.
Judge Turpin(Sings):
'Tis true, sir, love can still inspire
The blood to pound, the heart leap higher.
Both (Sings):
What more, what more can man require—
Judge Turpin(Sings):
Than love, sir?
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
More than love, sir.
Judge Turpin(Sings):
What, sir?
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Women.
Judge Turpin(Sings):
Ah yes, women.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Pretty women.
The Judge hummed jauntily; the thought of pretty women distracted him so. Todd whistled and started stropping his razor rhythmically. He then lathered the Judge's face. Still whistling, Todd stood back to survey the judge, who by now was totally relaxed, eyes closed. No doubt Turpin was off in a land of twisted wonder, not realizing just how much danger he had put himself in. Todd was completely focused on what he was set out to do.
All the while, Chrysalis sat and watched as the scene unfolded, as if she were taking notes. There was something about this she longed to remember, to learn from, and to apply to her own ventures. She longingly dreamt of having these very moments with her most despised enemies, while she slept at night cursing her every failure.
She watched silently as Todd picked up his most prized razor. Immediately, the entire tone of the scene shifted. The barber sang a soft, somber tone to his prized possession, preparing for the daunting and most important task at hand.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Now then, my friend.
Now to your purpose.
Patience, enjoy it.
Revenge can't be taken in haste.
Judge Turpin (Sings, opening his eyes):
Make haste, and if we wed,
You'll be commended, sir.
Despite the Judge's rude interruption, something he said caught Todd and Chrysalis' attention. The barber approached the chair, leaning toward his customer.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
My lord...
And who, may it be said,
Is your intended, sir?
Judge Turpin(Sings):
My ward.
Shock tremored through Todd – as the Judge closed his eyes again and settled in comfortably... the barber's rage slightly rising...
"And pretty as a rosebud," The Judge sighed.
"Pretty as her mother?" Todd suggested, aside.
"What?" The Judge sat up, mildly puzzled. "What was that?"
"Oh, nothing, sir," Todd dismissed the notion quickly. "Nothing. May we proceed?"
Turpin sat back in the chair, once again comfortable for the service to begin. Chrysalis watched with anticipation as Sweeney Todd stepped behind the Judge – his razor ready – certain of the great moment to come – Todd finally placed the razor at the man's neck, ever so inching closer to the skin. She could feel the want to see the blood spill all over his throat.
And then, with an easy flick of his wrist, Todd cleanly shaved the man's chin as he sang. All the while, he snuck glances toward Chrysalis while doing so. He had no idea why, but he found his gaze drawn to her... to the creature behind the mask of beauty.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Pretty women...
Fascinating...
Sipping coffee, dancing...
Pretty women
Are a wonder.
Pretty women.
Sitting in the window or
Standing on the stair,
Something in them
Cheers the air.
Pretty women...
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Silhouetted...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Stay within you...
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Glancing...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Stay forever...
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Breathing lightly...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Pretty women...
Turpin & Todd (Sings):
Pretty women!
Blowing out their candles or
Combing out their hair...
They proceed to sing simultaneously:
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Then they leave...
Even when they leave you
And vanish, they somehow
Can still remain
There with you,
There with you.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Even when they leave,
They still
Are there.
They're there.
Turpin & Todd (Sings):
Ah,
Pretty women...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
At their mirrors...
Judge Turpin (Sings):
In their gardens...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Letter-writing...
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Flower-picking...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Weather-watching...
Turpin & Todd (Sings):
How they make a man sing!
Proof of heaven
As you're living—
Pretty women, sir!
There was no doubt about it this time. The music approaches a feverish crescendo, as Chrysalis braced herself. Todd was just about to finally kill the Judge right before her eyes. Her gaze widened with a toothy, evil smile. She relished this moment, waiting to see a man's revenge exacted in the most perfect way imaginable.
Judge Turpin (Sings):
Pretty women, yes!
Pretty women, sir!
Pretty women!
Pretty women, sir!
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Pretty women, here's to
Pretty women, all the
Pretty women—
At the height of the climax, Todd raised his arm in a huge arc. Todd was about to go in for the killing slice, to finally have his vengeance for all the pain and agony the vile judge inflicted upon him many years ago. Chrysalis leaned closely as the barber was about to slash the Judge's throat when—
Suddenly, the door burst open as Anthony rushed in!
"Mr. Todd! I've seen Johanna! She said she'll leave with me tonight--!"
The sailor stopped as soon as he realized who was sitting as Todd's customer. The Judge leapt up, away from Todd, fueled with burning anger.
"You!" Turpin snarled. "There is indeed a higher power to warn me thus in time—"
The old man tore off the white sheet, wiping off the shaving lather and threw it angerly at Anthony, as he advanced savagely.
"Johanna elope with you? Deceiving slut! I'll lock her up in some obscure retreat where neither you nor any other vile creature shall ever lay eyes on her again--!"
He then spun with venom toward Todd, who was so despondent he didn't react when the Judge spat at the man.
"And as for you, barber, it is all too clear what company you keep. Service them well and hold their custom – for you'll have none of mine."
And just like that, Judge Turpin stormed right out of the building, with no intent of 'every' returning for another service. But instead, the Judge had his own plans to enact. Sweeney Todd did not give chase, nor did he uttered in an objection or plea, he just stood there... frozen.
To say the disguised changeling was furious was an understatement. It looked like Chrysalis's face was oozing radioactive waste, with a fuse ready to ignite due to the heat of the burning anger.
"You... insolent fool!" Chrysalis shrieked. "You realize what you've done?! You show up at the most inopportune moment... and you ruined everything!"
"But Ms. Winters – you and Mr. Todd have to help me –" Anthony tried reasoning. "I've talked to Johanna and--!"
"Your excuses have no meaning! If you know what's good for you, you stay away and never return on your life!"
"But—"
Todd suddenly turned toward Anthony with a ferocious roar:
"OUT! OUT, I SAY!!!"
Utterly stunned at his friend's ferocity, a temper that worked wonders, Anthony backed away and hastily rushed out of the shop, out of sight. In the quiet ambience of the shop, Chrysalis's huffing slowly calmed down as she turned around toward Todd. Very agitated, he stood over his chance motionless, as if he were in shock. She could see his mind was cracking apart and it didn't get any better when Mrs. Lovett hurried in.
"All this shouting and running about, what's happened--?" Mrs. Lovett asked.
"I had him – and then—" Todd muttered.
"The sailor busted in, I know," Mrs. Lovett finished. "I saw them both running down the street and I said—"
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
Todd (Sings):
I had him!
His throat was bare
Beneath my hand--!
Mrs. Lovett (Speaks):
There, there, dear. Don't fret—
Todd (Sings):
No, I had him!
His throat was there,
And he'll never come again!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Easy now.
Hush, love, hush.
I keep telling you—
Todd (Sings):
When?!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
What's your rush?
Todd (Sings):
Why did I wait?
You told me to wait!
Now he'll never come again...
Chrysalis could feel the mood growing ferocious as she bore witness to Todd's wrenching insanity. By now, he was already close to the surface, and finally... he exploded.
Todd (Sings):
There's a hole in the world
Like a great black pit
And it's filled with people
Who are filled with shit
And the vermin of the world
Inhabit it—
But not for long!
Suddenly, Todd turned toward Mrs. Lovett and Chrysalis – the former started back – alarmed by the pure madness in his eyes – while Chrysalis gazed with a sense of awe.
Todd (Sings):
They all deserve to die!
Tell you why, my dear pets,
Tell you why:
Because in all of the whole human race, little pets
There are two kinds of men and only two.
There's the one staying put
In his proper place
And the one with his foot
In the other one's face—
Look at me, little pets,
Look at you—
Suddenly, he lurched and grabbed Mrs. Lovett tightly—
Todd (Sings):
No, we all deserve to die!
Even you, Mrs. Lovett,
Even I.
Because the lives of the wicked should be—
Made brief.
For the rest of us, death
Will be a relief—
We all deserve to die!
Todd clutched her to him very tightly, slashing the air violently with the other hand. Then suddenly, he keened, a howl of pure agony:
Todd (Sings):
And I'll never see Johanna,
No, I'll never hug my girl to me—
He hurled Mrs. Lovett away from him, the latter landing in Chrysalis's grasp briefly before even the Changeling cast the baker aside.
Todd (Sings):
Finished!
All at once, as Sweeney Todd kept slashing the air ravenously, Chrysalis found herself gazing—
<>
--Into Todd's mind.
Somehow, Chrysalis found herself outside the streets, among the people of London in the streets. It didn't take long to find Todd, stalking relentlessly, holding his razor, striding down the street like a tiger. The many pedestrians they passed hardly noticed them, not even the fact that Chrysalis was outside her human disguise. They are invisible to them, wolves among the sheep, as the barber beckoned—
Todd (Sings):
All right! You, sir,
How about a shave?
Come and visit
Your good friend, Sweeney--!
And they continued in stride, Todd beckoning another man:
Todd (Sings):
You, sir, too, sir—
Welcome to the grave!
I will have vengeance,
I will have salvation!
Once more, Todd and Chrysalis continued in stride, the latter watching him beckoning more and more men:
Todd (Sings):
Who, sir? You, sir?
No one's in the chair—
Come on, come on,
Sweeney's waiting!
I want you bleeders!
You, sir – anybody!
Gentlemen, now don't be shy!
Not one man, no,
Nor ten men,
Nor a hundred
Can assuage me—
I will have you!
And from one man to another, Todd continued to prowl as Chrysalis followed like a lioness with the lion.
Todd (Sings):
And I will get him back
Even as he gloats.
In the meantime, I'll practice
On less honorable throats—
Suddenly, Todd fell to his knees. Chrysalis loomed over him as he keened in anguish—
Todd (Sings):
And my Lucy lies in ashes
And I'll never see my girl again,
But the work waits, I'm alive at last
And I'm full of JOOOOOOOOY!!!
With one final exalted cry, Sweeney Todd raised his razor high on the soaring last note. Just as Chrysalis reached out, something pulled her back... her view suddenly obscured by a strange, frenzied fluttering of black wings. She fought to pull herself back, as she discovered the black wings are pigeons, thousands of them, flying up in a great cloud...
Chrysalis was pulled back to finally discover that Todd knelt in the heart of a church square... empty but for him. As his cry came to an end, Chrysalis was slashed back to—
<>
Sweeney Todd, kneeling on the floor of his shop. Sweat poured through his clothes, panting for breath. Beside Chrysalis, Mrs. Lovett stood. And like Chrysalis, they looked down at him intently.
"That's all very well, but what are we going to do about the dear departed?" Mrs. Lovett asked, kicking the chest.
But Sweeney Todd didn't answer. He remained kneeling, motionless. Sighing, Chrysalis approached him.
"Listen Todd!" Chrysalis spoke firmly. "You need to get a hold of yourself! Do you hear me?"
Chrysalis slapped Todd's cheek – he looked up at her, barely seeing her or Lovett.
"Oh, you great useless thing," Mrs. Lovett groaned. "Come on—"
Mrs. Lovett hauled him up and practically dragged the barber back to her pie shop, Chrysalis following behind.
<>
Finally, they made it back to the pie shop, yet not without a struggle.
"Sit down," Mrs. Lovett ordered Todd.
Todd thumped down, still in his own dark world. While he sat quietly, Mrs. Lovett quickly glanced around for Toby and then went straight for her parlor. While Lovett was gone, Chrysalis stared at Todd, who just sat in the chair as if under some form of trance. Slowly, she approached Todd's side and slowly took a seat on the empty chair closest to him. For a moment, they said nothing as she looked out toward the window occasionally glancing back at his frowning, yet calm face.
"It hurts, doesn't it?" Chrysalis asked, comforting. "Coming so close to enacting revenge, only for some fool to rip it away from you at the last moment. There have been many times where my enemies slipped out of my grasp, and every time it only fuels my anger to resolve and return again."
When Todd didn't answer, Chrysalis strode toward the window, her own hateful eyes looking toward the people out on the street.
"All those... people. Full of ruthless habits and disgusting minds, yet they have the gall to call me the villain?" Chrysalis scoffed. "Their heroes so bling in their morals and righteousness that they don't realize there are villains right in their vicinity; even sitting next to them eating... pies, cakes, cookies... and brownies!"
Chrysalis paused in her rant, taking this time to draw a few deep breaths before proceeding.
"What reason do they have to live?" She snarled, almost salivating. "Why? Because they are just like everyone else? And we are subjected and purged because we are different? Outcasts? The oddballs of society? They disgust me... all the injustice that is allowed to fester. How did the world become so naïve to the world around them? The world has gone too soft; it deserves to be purged... all of it."
Whether or not Sweeney Todd heard a single word from Chrysalis, she took every advantage to rant. The years of frustration and anger had been cooped up within her for so long, held back by the need to maintain a sense of regal dignity. Yet even someone like she knows there's only so much madness within her to contain until even her own patience pools over. Even so, she's meant to represent the Dark Order as their most trusted among their ranks and here she was in a dreary town with a mad barber without even their permission to enter their premises. And if she were to go back now, if she were to crawl back to the 'order' with nothing to show for, she'd be no better than the has-been of a centaur and a misguided filly.
Perhaps, this was just what Sweeney Todd and Chrysalis have in common... outcasts driven by a desire for revenge, yet nowhere within its grasp. Just a regular pair of 'failures'.
<>
In between, Mrs. Lovett discovered Toby sound asleep on the sofa before the fire. She quickly snatched up a bottle of gin from the sideboard and returned to the pie shop. She found the pair sitting together, pouring a tumbler of gin, and handing it to them.
"There, drink it down," Mrs. Lovett instructed softly. "All the way – that's right..."
Sweeney Todd does so, at least having a sense to drink away the sorrow between his frustration.
"... Now, we got a body molderin' away upstairs," Mrs. Lovett reminded. "What do you intend we should do about that?"
"Later on, when it's dark, we'll take him to some secret place and bury him," Todd answered.
"Yes, we would do that," Chrysalis nodded. "It's not like he has relatives coming to poke around looking for him."
Meanwhile, Lovett turned to the commonfolk passing her shop. She pondered over what to do with the body of that con barber. Suddenly, an unheard sting played as an idea came to her head... a desperately, despicable, deviously, deceptive, and downright diabolical idea...
"And why should we settle with burying our debts?" Mrs. Lovett inquired.
"What are you rambling about now, Lovett?" Chrysalis groaned, frustrated.
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
"Well, you both know me, sometimes bright ideas just pop right into my head, and I keep thinking..."
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Seems a downright shame...
The two turned to Lovett as she started to saunter towards her counter.
"Shame?" Sweeney asked.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Seems an awful waste...
Such a nice plump frame
Wot's-his-name
Has...
Had...
Has...
Nor it can't be traced.
Business needs a lift—
Debts to be erased—
Think of it as thrift,
As a gift...
If you get my drift...
No?
As Lovett turned toward the two, Sweeney seemed unresponsive while Chrysalis simply looked unimpressed. She, like her friend, was not following along. Lovett sighed and simply continued sharing her thoughts aloud, ladling the usual 'filling' for her pies which was poured back in with an unsatisfying plop.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Seems an awful waste.
I mean,
With the price of meat what it is,
When you get it,
If you get it—
Suddenly, Chrysalis and Sweeny slowly turned towards each other. In that moment, they finally understood what the piemaker was implying. A slight smirk grew on the barber's face while Chrysalis's response was far more piqued. A villainous idea, yes... but one she most eagerly wants to do.
"Ah!" Sweeney and Chrysalis remarked.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings, warming to the idea):
Good, you got it.
Take, for instance,
Mrs. Mooney and her pie shop.
Business never better, using only
Pussycats and toast.
And a pussy's good for maybe six or
Seven at the most.
And I'm sure they can't compare
As far as taste—
Sweeney and Chrysalis soon stood up to join her, leading into a triangle dance.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Mrs. Lovett, what a charming notion,
Chrysalis (Sings):
And it would be a waste...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Eminently practical and yet
Appropriate as always.
Chrysalis (Sings):
It is an idea...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Mrs. Lovett, how I lived without you
All these years, I'll never know!
Sweeney Todd (w/Chrysalis, sings):
How delectable!
Also undetectable.
How choice!
How rare!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Think about it...
Lots of other gentlemen'll
Soon be coming for a shave,
Won't they?
Think of
All them
Pies!
They soon danced toward the window, watching the passersby, pondering all the potential 'customers' for their unethical undertaking to revamp both businesses.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
For what's the sound of the world out there?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
What, Mr. Todd?
What, Mr. Todd?
What is that sound?
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Those crunching noises pervading the air?
Chrysalis (Sings):
Yes, Mr. Todd!
Yes, Mr. Todd!
Yes, all around!
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
It's man devouring man, my dears!
All three (Sings):
And (then) who are we to deny it, in here?
As Mrs. Lovett returned to her counter, Chrysalis and Sweeney gave a sinister look of agreement.
"Why, Nellie, dear... what a delightfully wicked solution to suggest..." The changeling remarked eagerly, with ecstasy. "I'm getting goosebumps over this!"
"Wicked, yes... but necessary for all of us," Sweeney added, facing the piemaker. "These are desperate times, Mrs. Lovett, and desperate measures are called for!"
"Call it what you will... but still... as you said, we'd be doing them a favor anyway. No skin off my brow~"
Soon, the piemaker reached into her oven to pull out a cooked meat pie, placing it down on the counter.
"Here we are now, hot out of the oven..."
The pair eyed the pastry curiously, along with a sly and wicked smile.
"What is that?" Chrysalis and Todd asked, with raised eyebrows.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
It's priest.
Have a little priest.
As Chrysalis realized the intent, she played along while Todd peered his eye from the shop window, toward a person of the very profession welcoming the parish.
Chrysalis (Sings):
Is it really good?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Dear, it's too good,
At least.
Then again, they don't commit sins of the flesh,
So, it's pretty fresh.
And as she sang, she too looked outside to the Priest Todd was looking at.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Awful lot of fat.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Only where it sat.
The barber's gaze soon turned to an oddly dressed chap reading a book of poetry of all things.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Haven't you got poet
Or something like that?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
No, you see the trouble with poet
Is, how do you know it's
Deceased?
Try the priest!
An audible 'mmm!' broke their concentration as they turned and saw Chrysalis mimicking a satisfied dining experience, holding the pie in question.
"Mrs. Lovett... simply heavenly! One might say... close to Godliness~ Ha-ha..."
"Why, thank ye, dearie," Mrs. Lovett responded, in kind. "Now I'll confess... not as hearty as bishop, perhaps, but not as bland as curate, either. So, it's good fer business, leaves you wantin' more. Problem is... we can only get it on Sundays..."
"Well, what could be simpler then?" Chrysalis slyly suggested. "Shave the priest for cheap after Sundayservice... sell him for double for Monday service~"
This remark earned a light chuckle from the piemaker as she and Todd looked out the window for more potential 'flavors'.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Lawyer's rather nice.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
If it's for a price.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Order something else, though, to follow,
Since no one should swallow
It twice.
Smirking at the two, Chrysalis joined their little game.
Chrysalis (Sings):
Anything that's lean?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Well, then, if you're British and loyal,
You might enjoy Royal
Marine.
Anyway, it's clean.
Though, of course, it tastes of wherever it's been.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Is that squire,
On the fire?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Mercy no, sir,
Look closer,
You'll notice it's grocer.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Looks thicker.
More like vicar.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
No, it has to be grocer— it's green.
Then, in the middle of everything, Sweeney began waltzing with Mrs. Lovett while also switching off to waltz with Chrysalis.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
The history of the world, my loves—
Chrysalis (Sings):
Save a lot of graves,
Do a lot of relatives favors...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Is those below serving those up above.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Everybody shaves,
So, there should be plenty of flavors...
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
How gratifying for once to know—
All Three (Sings):
That those above will serve those down below!
"Now then, let's see... what do you say about... tinker~?" Mrs. Lovett suggested, pointing toward a pauper.
Sweeney and Chrysalis looked at the tool carrying man, no doubt inquiring for work. They looked at each other with concern.
"Mm... something pinker," Sweeney remarked.
"Tailor?" Mrs. Lovett eyed a well-suited man.
"Something paler," Chrysalis added.
"Potter?"
"Something hotter," Sweeney retorted.
"Butler?"
"Something... subtler?" Chrysalis and Sweeney said in unison.
"Hmm... locksmith?"
The two were stunned as they couldn't think of the proper rhyme for that profession. So, they continued their little game of naming flavors.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Lovely bit of clerk.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Maybe for a lark.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Then again there's sweep
If you want it cheap
And you like it dark!
Try the fancier,
Peak of his career—
Chrysalis (Sings):
Ugh, looks pretty rank!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Well, he drank,
It's a bank
Cashier.
Never really sold.
Chrysalis (Sings):
Maybe it was old.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Have you any Beadle?
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Next week, so I'm told!
Chrysalis (Sings):
Though Beadle's not bad till you smell it and
Notice how well it's been greased...
Mrs. Lovett (w/Chrysalis, sings):
Stick to priest!
"Now, the two of you might find this one a bit stringy, but..." Mrs. Lovett pointed out. "I highly recommend the fiddle player.
The two leaned closer, spying a man carrying a musical instrument, though it was actually hard to tell what it was. The sight of which made Chrysalis raise an eyebrow.
"Mrs. Lovett, your eyes must be going, because that is obviously a piccolo player, or possibly a flutist," The disguised Changeling corrected.
"Now, how can you tell?"
"Well... it looks piping hot!"
This issued a hearty chuckle from the piemaker.
"Then blow on it first, love!" Lovett added.
The two women shared the laughter as the barber turned back to face them.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
The history of the world, my sweets—
Chrysalis (Sings):
Oh, Mr. Todd,
Ooh, Mr. Todd,
What does it tell?
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Is who gets eaten, and who gets to eat?!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
And Mr. Todd,
Too, Mr. Todd,
Who gets to sell?!
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
But fortunately, it's also clear
All three (Sings):
That (But) ev'rybody goes down well with beer!
"Well now, since the marine don't appeal to neither of you..." Mrs. Lovett spied a naval officer. "Why not try a little rear admiral?"
"Honestly, way too salty," Chrysalis pointed out. "Too much salt from such an old salt would kill any man."
"I prefer... general?" Sweeney inquired, seeing another decorated officer. "Have you that?"
"With or without his privates? – 'With' is extra."
Chrysalis, getting the innuendo, guffawed with Mrs. Lovett as the latter returned to her counter, pulling out another pie from the oven and presenting it to them.
"What is that?" Sweeney asked.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
It's fop.
Finest in the shop.
Or we have some shepherd's pie peppered
With actual shepherd
On top.
She presented the pair with a pie clearly overstuffed with filling and placed on a doily.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
And I've just begun~
Here's the politician – so oily
It's served with a doily –
Have one?
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Put it on a bun.
Chrysalis (Sings):
Well, you never know if it's going to run!
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Try the friar.
Fried, it's drier.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
No, the clegy is really
Too coarse and too mealy.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
Then actor—
That's compacter.
Chrysalis (Sings):
Yes, and always arrives overdone.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
We'll come again when you
Have Judge on the menu...
Mrs. Lovett grabbed a rolling pin, while Chrysalis went for the butcher's knife.
"True, we don't have judge yet..." Chrysalis suggested.
"... But would you settle for the next best thing?" Lovett finished.
"What's that?"
The two ladies eyed each other devilishly as they answered grimly:
"Executioner!"
The barber smiled with intrigue as they rejoined in the dance. Todd took the cleaver from Chrysalis, feeling the heft of it. It felt so... good.
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
Have charity toward the world, my pets—
Chrysalis (Sings):
Yes, yes, I know, Mr. Todd!
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
We'll take the customers that we can get.
Mrs. Lovett (Sings):
High-born and low, my love!
Sweeney Todd (Sings):
We'll not discriminate great from small.
Sweeney Todd (w/Chrysalis, sings):
No, we'll serve anyone—
All three (Sings):
Meaning anyone
And to anyone
At all!
And the music built to a climax as they joyously brandished their 'weapons' before breaking down with a sinister laugh.
"Oh, I wonder what pony meat tastes like!" Chrysalis smirked, licking her lips.
"I'm partial to sandwiched meself with 'orse meat, least when I'm not busy bakin' pies," Mrs. Lovett added. "Mind you, that does sound like a good recipe for me meat pies. Much better than pussy meat, that's for sure."
As Mrs. Lovett returned to her pie-making station, Sweeney turned to his companion.
"How do you think you'll get them here?" Todd asked curiously.
An evil glint flickered in the changeling's eyes, one she prided herself on perfecting.
"I have a few ideas," Chrysalis smiled maliciously. "I'll have to improvise though... shouldn't be too hard..."
And thus, upon this very day, the heat was on. Already, the kitchen was getting fired up for business. Those idiots residing in London had no idea what was coming to them. More importantly, neither did those blasted ponies and their moronic dragon pet. For once in Chrysalis' long-standing career, everything was finallygoing to go her way.
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