18 years old
Decem

My arms wrapped around the man at the door, hugging him before welcoming him inside. "Cobalt. Have you've come to help?"

"Kind of, I guess I just wanted to speak to Eliza about some things." He shrugged stepping past the doorframe and into the room.

A sharp gasp falling from his mouth at the sight of Eliza. Poor Eliza, crumpled on the floor by her bed. Her head buried in the mattress and her legs folded underneath her.

"She's not the greatest right now, so go easy on her." My words aren't necessary, he could see her pain but what friend would I be if I didn't warn him anyway. I need to protect her and he needed to know there was nothing I wouldn't do to achieve that.

"Hey Eliza, how are you?" Her blotchy face lifted from the pillow, her eyes squinted and dimmed red as she sniffles into her arms.

"Alive." She grunted, throwing her head back into the mattresses to hush her sudden cries.

Her head popped back up when she had then under control.

"Have you spoken to Samyuri?" Her eyes dim but hope in her voice. She hoped that Ci sky had come bearing good news from his best friend, I doubted it. Samyuri had let me down and he would continue to let his mate down, he was selfish.

"Yes. He's- well he's livid. He's heard about what you've been up to and he's not happy." He looked awkward and uncomfortable with the topic of conversation but he prodded on. It was clear that this was what he came for.

"No? well he shouldn't have left me then should have he."

She was no longer leaning on her bed any longer, instead her arms were in her lap as she sat crossed leg. Her back to the bed and eyes set directly on cobalt.

"Just because you're on a break doesn't mean you should be intimate with other guys."

Eyes rolling, she climbed it her feet, "I haven't, not yet."

Which was true, she hadn't had sex with any males since Samyuri had decided to be the scumbag I was beginning to think all non-matured wolves were. It was as if they were incapable of being caring. They would give you 5 minutes of love and then it dried up like the water in the dessert. Their love became a hallucination, a mirage that left you grasping onto thin air and your mind rocking with loss.

"Not yet? Are you hearing yourself? Eliza please, he loves you. Don't ruin the bond with your actions?" His words caused the hairs on the back of my arm to rise, back rising like a black cat ready to sink its claws in.

"My actions? My actions?" How dare he try blame her. I wouldn't stand for that and neither would Eliza. She would slap this man back into place.

"It wasn't me who decided not to be mated after 2 years of being together." She was on her feet now, stepping towards him, hand thudding against her chest.

"It wasn't me who decided they needed a 'break' from this, and it wasn't me who sneaked home to my parents in the middle of the night." Head shaking, tears falling, she snapped.

Tears dribbled down her eyes as her voice reached a new octave, "It was him! He fed me all these lines. He got what he wanted! He was my first but I won't let him be my last!"

Samyuri had hurt her deeply and I hated him for it. She was fine without his love. He didn't need to bring her love to only rip it away from her.

It was cruel.

He stepped towards her, interjecting through her tirade, "You're throwing this away!"

She crumpled to the floor at his words, deflated in pain.

"Seriously Cobalt, I know he's your friend but he's in the wrong. Don't try and convince us any differently."

He was deluded, I don't know what magic juice he was drinking to actually think Eliza had a choice in this matter.

His head twisted to me, "At least one of us is trying to be a friend and salvage this relationship." He accused.

My hand in the air as I retreated away from him, "It's not my place to do that. I'm trying to be here for Eliza but I can't fix the choices he's made."

I was trying to be here for Eliza, not fill her head with false promises and half truths. How dare he try and call me anything but a good friend! He was the one entertaining his friend's choice, allowing Samyuri to leave a devastated mate.

"You know what it's like to be without a mate, how can you allow her to do this." He shouted, frothing at the mouth and face a furious red.

"Seriously Cobalt! It's not her fault. He made his bed she is only trying to deal with the blows he has thrown at her."

My back was up against the wall. I wanted them together with every fibre of my being but I couldn't help but think it was too late. Sam had damaged her with his carelessness, discarding her love like a flimsy piece of paper.

"Its like he doesn't want her but he doesn't want her to move on either." I sighed, making my way over to Eliza and stroking her limp head. Her head tilted towards me showcasing her pained raw eyes.

"That's not true at all. Maybe he just needs time to convince his parents."

Was he dumb, my eyes rolled heavenwards as I scoffed at him. "Has he told you that?" My hand stilling in her hair and her breath catching in her throat. We waited for him to ease our hearts, to put Eliza out of her misery. For him to have mercy on her heart.

The air in her chest gushed out and I sighed with what we knew was true "No? I didn't think so." Sarcasm dripping from the very word.

"I'm not going to tell Eliza to wait." My words were for him but I could not stop looking at my bedraggled friend.

"Especially when the society we live in doesn't encourage young relationships and these young wolves are quick to follow that tradition."

This wasn't her. The damaged woman before me was not my Eliza. Her Long hair was uncombed and matted, her slanted eyes swollen and puffy. Tears were trailing down her face, cheeks ruddy and lips bleeding from biting.

Nail marks the shape of half moons littered across her arm, the wounds turning purple with her self infliction.

Look what he was turning her into.

His voice brought my eyes away from her, my mouth falling open in shock, "Seriously Vanya, I thought better of you. Don't let your personal feelings get in between them." He was disappointed, His brows furrowed deep and his nose creasing in annoyance.

"It's not me that is doing this, it's him. He is allowing his parents to affect this bond."

I would not take this blame for either male. If Samyuri didn't like what was going on then he needed to bring his confused ass back here and fix this problem.

I was tired of this. These wolves had everything before them, dedicated mates who would give them anything and instead, they ran from us like the cowards they were. They would tell us they needed time but in that time they would be seeing other people, getting females pregnant and having babies.

Having little pups and running away from their mates to live with knew ones. Forgetting their family once they enveloped themselves in a new relationship. We were forgotten once they decided they would rather live without us than live with us.

Like that good for nothing mate the gods had put me with, he had done this same thing to me. He had needed time, but time was irrelevant. It could never fix what had maybe never been right.

My case was the worst possible scenario and perhaps Eliza's would never reach that degree of bad -gods knows I hoped it didn't. Either way, I couldn't call myself a friend and encourage her to wait. Not when I was starting to doubt his willingness to really be with her.

Eliza needed a grand gesture from him but all we were receiving from him was static. Static and demands.

"Why does it mean so little to them but so much to us?" Despair, all I felt was despair. What little remained of my hope had been placed in Eliza and Samyuri and he was actively destroying it. Crushing it beneath his heavy boot.

"He loves her. Why can't you see that?" Cobalt murmured earnestly, his eyes relating all his frustration and angst.

"Because love means nothing when he is prepared to throw away everything. If he loves her he would be here."

I was crying now. I could feel that cold liquid on my skin. I thought I had been done with tears but I never could be. This situation brought back so many memories of the weak Vanya I had been for him. I couldn't allow Eliza to fall into the step of Samyuri's dance.

"If he loved me he would have never left" Eliza amended, moving from her crumbled position and climbing to a rise.

Wiping her tears, she sat on her bed grabbing the tissue I offered her and wiping her nose.

"That's not true, how can any of you think that? You guys are meant to be."

But Eliza wasn't listening to his crap and his words were only annoying me more. Cobalt had good intentions but he was not helping, not one ounce. There were times when you just couldn't defend or justify your friend's actions. This was such a time.

Brows raising, I challenged him, "Why? Because the bond says so. I won't let that bond dictate our lives. If she wants to be with another male, then she can be."

"A good friend wouldn't encourage promiscuity!" He spat.

Damn, he was on a warpath. His anger moving him like I had never seen in the few years we had been friends and more.

I understood that he felt strongly about this, he hated females who stepped out on their mates. Females who cheated but he was so caught up on his anger from his mate he couldn't even see that Eliza was nothing like his mate Zanita.

Huffing I replied trying to remain calm even though I could feel that thread slipping through my fingers.

"I'm not but I won't be the friend telling her to go beg Sam to change his mind Because I've been that female and begging never changes anything."

Gods, he had no idea the lengths I had gone to get my mates approval all the while the male hadn't even cared enough. I had begged, cried, changed myself and still I had never been what he wanted. I couldn't help but feel that if Sam wanted her, there would be nothing in this earth that could stop him.

His actions could only mean one thing. So why would I encourage my friend to degrade herself for him. I wouldn't.

"It's her choice if she wants to have sex with other males. I won't interfere with it because I know first hand her pain!"

Pointing to his chest he stepped closer, "And I don't? I've been in the same position as both of you!"

"I'm just trying to help. Samyuri has said he won't have her if she is having sex with other males" he shrugged nonchalantly. Turning his back on the effect his words would have.

"He said that?" Her eyes widening in shock and disbelief, tears gushing from her face in fear. Kissing my teeth, I made my way over to her. Rubbing her back, trying to soothe the ache of loosing him for good. She had hope up until now.

I was getting angry beyond belief, "Whose to say she will even want him when he's done?" My chin jutting out as I clutched her tighter to me.

He scoffed, "Of course she will" eyes rolling as if I was stupid to believe anything else. It was all I needed to loose that small grasp I had on sanity.

"Why? Because we are females and we have been taught to except that men can be promiscuous but we can't?" I shouted to his turned back. Moving to my feet as Eliza climbed to a stand with me. Her eyes spitting fire.

"Fuck your sexist ideology! I'm done with patriarchy and I'm done with your shit!" Eliza screamed, pushing him on his back until he was by the door.

"Get out! Get out!" She cried, mentally breaking as she punched and pounded on his back. Her arms swinging until she was emotionally depleted. Her body collapsed on her bed as she retreated away from him and this situation. Sobs wracking her body.

"What? No! You know that's not true! I don't think that." Cobalt cried but I was already hushing him, yanking open the door and trying to shove his resistant body out of it.

"Vanya ple-"

"No, you listen here cobalt. You are Someone I care about so I am going to give you this one reprieve but if you ever attack Eliza like that again, I will decimate you."

His mouth opened to rebuke what I had said but I shut him down. Pushing him over the threshold and closing it. "Now get out."

I stood facing the door, head propped along the wood as I tried to collect myself before I could face Eliza and all the fresh turmoil he had reignited inside her. Heart beating in my chest and tears stinging my eyes at the hurtful sound of her cries.

"Vanya" her hushed whisper carried across the room, grabbing my attention even though I had yet to move.

"Hmm baby girl," I sighed making my way towards the bed. Sitting by the edge of her mattress, I took in the sight of her. Her eyes were closed and her skin had lost its pallor. Her hair was splayed across her face like a mourning veil. The death of her love creating a dark shroud around her head.

"Will he really not want me." Her voice hoarse and scratched from all her crying.

"Don't listen to him. I don't care about Samyuri, I care about you" I tutted, annoyed that Cobalt's words had struck her so deeply. He had made this much worse than it needed to be.

"I don't want you to compromise your integrity for him."

My hand stroked along her dark hair, rubbing her scalp in soothing circles. "If you want to have sex and you think you can live with the outcome then do it."

"But if there is one doubt in your mind. One tiny little doubt, then don't"

My fingers moved down to her temple massaging her head and then down to her eyes. Lightly gliding over her damp face. My hands were as light as butterfly wings, gliding over the skin like an angel's kiss.

"He's hurt you enough, I won't let you hurt yourself anymore okay." I shuffled closer on the bed, my head rested near hers as we lay side by side.

"Okay," she croaked, eyes still closed and heart slowing to a halt.

We lay there for what seemed like hours, Eliza's eyes clenched closed and my arms wrapped around her. Rubbing up and down her back until her heart slowed down in sleep.

Slowly removing my arms from around her I sat up and shuffled to the edge of the bed, prepared to leave for the night.

"Vanya," I hummed a response turning around to meet her soulful hazel eyes.

"How did you survive this?" Tears gathering in her eyes again or maybe they had never left.

"Sometimes it hurts so bad I just want to die. My heart hurts so bad and I just can't." Her voice cracking and tears trailing into her mouth.

I crawled until I had her back in my arms, her head against my chest and wetting my skin with her pain. I made shushing noises as I tried to calm her tears but the noises only became louder. She couldn't stop until she had them out.

"I can't see how I will ever get better-" she hiccupped, gasping and choking mid sob.

"But you did and I just want to know how." She ripped her head from my shoulders as she looked into my eyes with hope and heartbreak.

Pulling her back into my shoulder I squeezed her tighter. In this moment of vulnerability, I was reminded of how young Eliza actually was. How young we both were. We were too young to go through such stifling heartbreak. Heartbreak that went beyond just the heart.

It was pain that was deep rooted in our soul. It was the worst kind of pain. That cold absence of love that you once held in your grasp. An absence of another's soul that you had once nestled within your own. It was the hardest kind of pain and she wanted to know how I had survived it.

I had no real answers for her, no remedy. No life quote or inspiration that would ease the pain. All I'd had was my family. I had Neema, Jana, Caillum and the twins.

"I had you baby girl, and you have me."