(Inspired by listening to Alec Banjamin - Worst Day of My Life; and couple other of his songs. Enjoy.)

In the morning, Dan woke up before everyone else, he just didn't feel like sleeping.

He knew that he was simply having one of those off days.

He started a new fire in the fireplace before walking to the kitchen, starting to make pancakes for everyone's breakfast.

He zoned out a lot, not really feeling anything at all around him.

- Good Morning, Dan! - his mum came and gave him a small kiss on the cheek, - You made all this by yourself? Oh, honey! You are an Angel! -

Dan looked down to see that he have already made enough food for not just breakfast but lunch too.

There was pancakes and other foods he didn't remember making.

Dan looked over to see that he have already made coffee too.

Everyone slowly made their way down, sitting around the table, eating and chatting.

Dan simply stood there, leaning against the kitchen bar, looking out of the window at nothing in particular, zoning out once again.

A touch on his hand made him focus again, looking up too see who was it.

- Come on, we're sharing our gifts. - his brother said with an assuring smile.

Dan simply nodded, following him to the living room where everyone was sat around the fireplace, already sharing their gifts.

Soon, it was his turn. He slowly took out an envelope from his pocket, giving it to Phil.

Phil looked up, a bit surprised, but took it, looking down at what was inside, his eyes widening in shock.

- Two person trip to Japan at cherry blossom time. One week of fully paid vacation. I thought that you'd love it. - Dan said with his voice still raspy.

- Dan... Thank you so so much! It is amazing! - Phil was in shock, not knowing how to react.

Dan let his head hang low.

Everyone was talking about how amazing the gift was.

- So nice. -

- So lovely. -

- Awww, -

- Amazing. -

He slowly got up, slipping away from everyone else sharing their gifts.

Dan slipped a coat on, walking outside.

He simply wandered around in the snowy land.

Sinking deeper and deeper in his mind.

When he'd bought that trip, everything had still been okay, he'd thought that they both could go there and enjoy it all together but, right now, Dan wasn't sure about this gift.

Yes, he did made Phil happy, but knowing that he might share the special trip with someone else made Dan's heart break.

He didn't even notice that he was crying, he was sitting down on at bench somewhere he didn't know.

It all just hurt so damn much.

Memories were playing in his head, screaming at him about his mistakes and things he should have done differently.

At first Dan had just let Phil be free, thinking that Phil just wanted a bit more fun, like breathe on his own, without Dan always at his side.

He had no idea that it would lead to them slipping further and further apart from each other.

Soon there was only like one kiss a day, nothing more.

Then there were days of barely even speaking, sleeping like two strangers next to each other in one bed.

But Dan still loved Phil with all his heart, he just didn't know what to do.

He felt unwanted, so he let Phil live on his own.

And then Phil said those words, and Dan was left broken.

He'd been breaking apart from the first day when everything started to go wrong, months before he'd actually gotten dumped, but in that moment he shattered into hundreds of small, sharp pieces.

He wasn't sure if there even was a way to fix the mess he was inside.

Because, no matter how hard he tried, there was no way back to Phil's heart, back to the relationship they'd once had.

Dan wanted to slap himself for how stupid he'd been, thinking that it would be for the best, that they wouldn't talk for a bit but then they'd magically get back together.

It was all such bullshit; people fall apart and when they start to ignore each other, the last stitches are cut.

Dan didn't even notice how it had already gotten dark outside.

He looked down at his hands that were now some weird bluish color.

He slowly got up, starting to walk back to the cabin.

He needed to talk about everything, to figure out what he should do next.

Dan felt extremely tired, he was zoning out a lot, not comprehending most of the walk back to the cabin.

So Dan choose to leave the big talk to tomorrow, when he wouldn't be like this.

Dan walked in, sighing.

And, the next moment, he was somehow already in the living room with everyone around him.

Dan didn't understand what was happening so he just waved everyone away.

- I'm fine, I'm fine. - Dan murmured, sliding down onto the couch, closing his eyes and blacking out.

Everyone around him was worried.

Phil felt guilty.

He sat down next to Dan, pulling a warm blanket all over him.

- I think he's having one of these weird days, I will watch over him. - Phil said to everyone, pushing Dan's damp hair out of his face.

Dan sighed softly like he was in pain.

Phil sighed too, runing his hand through Dan's hair.

that night Phil had a lot of time to think.

He was thinking back to all the things that had happened, thinking about all the why's why they were in a situation like this.

When he'd broken up with Dan, he'd really felt like it was the right thing to do.

Phil had been tired.

Maybe not of Dan but just of the situation itself.

But now seeing Dan so hurt, it hurt Phil too.

Phil still didn't know if he had made a mistake or the right choice.

Because after break up, one will always left hurt while other was walking away completely fine.

He looked down at the sleeping Dan before standing up, only to sit down in the couch right next to the one Dan was sleeping in.

Phil watched Dan until he fell asleep.

In the morning Dan woke up with an annoying headache eating at him.

He shrugged before getting up fully to see sleeping Phil on the couch next to the one he was in.

Dan had no idea why Phil was sleeping here and not in the fancy bed upstairs.

He didn't remember anything that could explain it either.

He slowly went to the kitchen, pouring black coffee into a cup and starting to drink it while looking out of the window.

For the first time in days, Dan didn't feel the urge to drink, well, at least for now.

Soon everyone else started to come down.

- I am so sorry about yesterday, I have no idea what got into me. - Dan said with sad smile, feeling everyone look at him.

- It's okay, don't worry. - his brother said, putting an arm around him.

- Thank you. I think I'll skip breakfast, I'm not really feeling hungry and I should gather my things for the train. - Dan put down his second coffee cup.

- Train? But we thought that you two would stay for a couple more days... - his mum speak up.

- I know, I just... - Dan took a deep breath. - I just... -

He just couldn't gather the strength to tell everyone about him and Phil.

For some reason he couldn't speak it out, as if him saying it out loud for everyone would make it official.

Dan just stood there without the ability to speak with everyone looking at him, waiting.

- Dan? - Phil stopped next to him, making Dan turn and look him in the eyes, - We already talked about that, we can stay a few extra days. Your job can wait a bit. Family time is more important. - Phil said with such a perfect smile, pulling Dan into hug.

Dan felt frozen.

He simply nodded, feeling the warmth of Phil seeping into his frozen body.

Dan closed his eyes, leaning into the touch, enjoying it while he could.

Phil let his fingers slide a bit more down, stopping at Dan's hip, griping it a bit tighter, knowing that such a small touch has always been able to calm Dan down.

This time it didn't help, it made everything even worse.

In that moment Dan felt the heat rush through his body, he wanted to cry and kiss Phil, asking for one more chance.

But Dan knew that he just couldn't do that, Phil deserved to be happy.

Dan let out a shaky breath before pulling away from Phil, facing his family.

His brother gave him a worrying look, as if to ask whether Dan was okay.

Dan just nodded, looking away.

Phil sat down, starting to eat.

Dan slowly walked upstairs, climbing into the big bed that still smelled like Phil.

With every day it got harder and harder to be so close to Phil but not close at all.

So Dan made his mind up, taking out his pc and starting to look for a new apartment to rent.

It was so hard to even think about moving away, they had chosen this flat together as their "family" home.

Dan couldn't believe that Phil still wanted to play this bullshit.

Dan felt sick of it.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when the bedroom door opened and Phil come in.

Dan looked back down, not really wanting to get lost in Phil's blue eyes again.

- Dan, can we please talk? - Phil walked closer, sitting down right in front of Dan.

- I am moving out. - Dan blurted out, not looking up.

- You what? - Phil was shocked, it felt like a slap to his face.

- I am moving out as soon as we get back. There is no point for me to stay there. - Dan said closing his laptop and putting it down on the nightstand, finally looking up at Phil.

Dan felt a bit confused to see how shocked and hurt Phil looked.

- I don't want you to move out... - Phil murmured, almost whined.

- And what, you want me to stay and watch how you make new life with someone else? I can't do that Phil. I am hurting, all this is hurting me. I can't do it anymore. - Dan sighed.

- I'm sorry... - Phil sounded hurt himself.

- Don't be. You deserve to be happy. And now there won't be me who will hold you down. - Dan said, looking down.

- You weren't holding me down, Dan. Never. I was wrong, I was so damn wrong. - Phil reached out for Dan's hand.

- Wrong? In what way, Phil? - Dan was confused, letting Phil take his hand.

- I thought that you didn't love me anymore but after seeing you over these past days, I realize that your love for me was even stronger than I ever knew. I was so damn wrong to break up with you. I was so stupid, I am so stupid. - there were tears in Phil's eyes.

- If you just want to fuck me, I would have let you anyway. - Dan blurted out, making them both burst out laughing.

- Dan, I want you back. I really want you back. All of you. To be honest, I can't live without you. - Phil looked so desperate.

- You know that I can't ever say no to you... - Dan mumbled, leaning closer to Phil.

- Will you be my boyfriend again? - Phil asked with hope in his voice and eyes.

- Of course, just please, please don't break up with me again... I won't survive you leaving... - Dan let a tear slip down his cheek.

- I am so so sorry... - Phil was crying too.

Dan pulled Phil into a hug, simply breathing in his scent.

Phil pulled Dan into a deep kiss, pouring out all the emotions, most of it love, pure love.

Dan felt dizzy from the sweet kiss, pulling Phil even closer.

The kiss got even more heated with every second, Dan eventually slid his hands down Phil's body, stopping at his ass.

- Still sore, you fucked me good. - Phil mumbled, kissing further down, staring to suck at Dan's neck.

Dan moaned, pulling Phil back up by his hair.

- You will make me hard with that. - Dan shook his head.

- Then let's just cuddle and enjoy each other, enjoy being together. - Phil said, pecking Dan's lips.

Dan smiled, a real smile this time, hugging Phil really tight.

Phil smiled, holding Dan close.

They both enjoyed the small moment shared, so simple but so full of love.