Dan was sitting on the couch, watching tv. Alone, once again.

He and Phil didn't spend much time together anymore.

Phil walked into the room, sitting down on the other side of the couch.

- We need to talk. - Phil said, looking at Dan, waiting for him to look up.

- About what? Are you going out again? - Dan asked without even looking up.

- No, about something more serious. - Phil started to get annoyed at Dan. - Can you finally fucking look up? -

Hearing the f word from Phil made Dan look up right away.

Blue eyes were no longer warm as they used to be, now they were pure ice.

- I can't do this anymore. It just doesn't work. I want to start seeing other people. People who would actually be interested in me, who would want to have sex with me, spend time with me and go out on dates! I can't do this anymore. I think it will be better if we break up. - Phil said without any hard emotions.

Dan watched him as if waiting for Phil to burst out laughing and say that it's just a joke, that he still loves him, and then lean down to kiss him. But none of that happened. Phil stayed as he was, not even wanting to move.

Dan felt a sharp pain spread through his chest, through his body.

He didn't say anything, there was no point in trying anymore.

He simply got up and walked to his room, grabbing a full bottle of vodka on his way.

Dan walked into his room, closing the door behind him.

He didn't switch on the light.

He simply sat down and opened the bottle of vodka, downing it straight.

That night, Dan cried a lot, but no sound came out.

He was crashing down and no amount of strong vodka could wash it away.

It was just 3 days till Christmas.

Phil was in a good mood, he felt like a big bag of rocks had been lifted off of his shoulders.

He felt free, like he could breathe again.

Dan stumbled out of his room around noon, just to get another bottle of vodka from their kitchen.

Phil didn't say anything; a small part of him was starting to get worried but he shrugged it off.

Phil had bigger things to worry about, like what to wear to the club tonight.

So they didn't say a word to each other, they didn't even look at each other.

They were complete strangers passing each other on their own paths, not really noticing the other's presence.

The next day, they both stumbled out of their rooms around 1 pm, both feeling really down.

Dan started to search for another drink to have because he'd downed both bottles of vodka already, but there was none to be found.

- Is there any vodka left? I have such a bad hangover. - Phil groaned as he sat down.

- Nada. - Dan groaned too, also sitting down.

- Ugh. - Phil let his head fall into his hands.

Dan couldn't bear to watch Phil for any longer so he got up and went outside.

Not far away. Just to buy a couple bottles of the strongest vodka.

When Dan got back, Phil was already asleep in his room.

He looked cute, Dan had to admit.

Dan let his head hang low, stomping back to the kitchen.

Dan didn't even notice himself making a hangover drink for Phil so he could feel better until he was standing with a glass next to sleeping Phil.

Dan blinked for a second, not doing anything.

He simply felt lost.

Dan shook his head, putting the drink down and walking back to his room with a bag full of vodka bottles.

Dan simply sat down, starting to drink away his feelings.

Phil woke up to see a glass on his night stand table.

Aww, Dan made me a drink, he thought before he stopped himself.

Phil shrugged, downing his drink and instantly feeling better.

His phone started to ring.

Mum

He picked it up, trying to sound as cheerful as always.

- Hi, honey! How are you? How is Dan doing? - Mum was asking in a cheerful tone.

- Hi, mum. We are doing great! How are you? - Phil liked talking with his mum so he didn't even need to fake his cheerfulness.

- I'm good, I'm good. Thanks. So, I was calling you to make sure that you and Dan will come to our Christmas holiday. Everything is already ready, I am so excited! Family Christmas! How sweet! - Mum's excitment could be felt through the phone but Phil was frozen.

Christmas holiday with family, shit!

They had forget about that.

They couldn't tell everyone that they'd broken up, it would ruin Christmas.

Phil didn't want to ruin everyone's holiday.

- Of course! We can't wait! We are so excited for it! - Phil heard himself lie.

Well, it wasn't a complete lie. When they'd first gotten to know about the little family Christmas holiday trip, they'd been very excited. But lately, they'd forgotten about it.

- That's so great! I can't wait to meet you two! My sweet babies! See you both tomorrow! - Mum said before hanging up.

Phil sat there, looking down at his phone, not sure of what to do next.

He rushed to Dan's room to see that Dan had fallen asleep with 3 empty vodka bottles lying next to his bed.

He sat down and started to wake Dan up.

- Mm? - Dan opened his eyes to see Phil's worried blue ones.

That made him immediately sit upright.

- What's wrong? What happened? Are you hurt? - Dan couldn't stop his hand reaching out to grab Phil's hand.

- What? No! Don't be stupid. - Phil shrugged, but kept Dan's hand on his arm. - Mum called and she reminded me about the holiday trip! I completely forgot about that! We can't announce that we're not together anymore. It will ruin everyone's Christmas! -

- And? - Dan slipped back into his black shell, taking his hand off Phil, sinking back into his pillows.

- And? Dan! We can't ruin everyone's Christmas! And I said to mum that we will be there and that we're excited about the whole thing! - Phil urged.

-Then cancel it! It is not my fucking problem that you chose to break up with me right before Christmas and then blurted out that we are still together! Deal with your fucking problem by yourself. - Dan groaned, leaning down to get another bottle of vodka.

- No, it is not! It is your problem too! And stop fucking drinking! - Phil snatched the bottle out of Dan's hands.

- Give it back! I can do what ever I want! - Dan raised his voice.

- First deal with OUR problem! - Phil raised his voice too, making Dan sit back.

- Fine. What do you want me to do? - Dan crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaning back against the headboard

- I don't know but we can't show that we're not together... - Phil was starting to panic; he really didn't want to ruin everyone's Christmas.

- Okay. - Dan shrugged.

- Okay, what? - Phil asked, turning to face him.

- Then let's pretend that nothing has happened. - Dan felt tired of this talk.

- Like fake that we are in relationship? - Phil asked.

- Yes. Don't play stupid. - Dan sighed.

- Okay, then it's a deal. For the holiday, while we're with our families, we will pretend that we're are still together. - Phil stretched out his hand for Dan to shake.

- Deal. Now give me my bottle back. - Dan stretched out his hand, shaking Phil's and then reaching for his vodka bottle.

- No, you can't be wasted. Tomorrow morning we are driving to spend time with our families so get ready, pack. - Phil stood up, walking away with the bottle still in his hand, making Dan sigh.