...December 23rd...

...2011....

"Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas Tree, oh Christmas tree, I wonder how tall you can get!" I sang. 

The three Vehicons glared at me as they decorated the tree. Megatron and co were still retrieving the large quantities of energon.  I had a shrug, "Just joking." The three resumed decorating the tree that was roughly ten feet taller than Starscream. I picked the side of my face to encounter peeling facial skin. It felt a lot like dried glue.  I ripped off some of my human skin then discarded it into a portable trash can.  Shockwave had strongly recommended that my peeling skin be taken of properly without making a mess. It was my personal skin trash can that came with a purple handle.

"Your singing is terrible." Third-zero said. 

"I agree," Farelp, the second Vehicon, said.  "Hey Bob the Vehicon," Farelp had backed off from the tree raising his optic brow. "How is the plugging in going?"

"Almost . . . .THERE!" Came Bob the  vehicon's grunt.

Third-Zero and Farelp hadn't their digits on the tree as it fell in my direction.

It fell forwards and forwards  blocking light from both sides. My eyes widened then I was sent crashing to the floor by the large tree branches. Do I really make a terrible singer?, I thought, Perhaps I need to practice all over again by singing a lot. Well that would take years girly! I felt something pressed against my chest. It was difficult to breath.

"Bob!" Farelp said.

"What?" Bob the Vehicon said. "What did I do?"

"Next time we're hold the tree!" Third-Zero said.

"Give me a servo, Third-Zero!" Farelp said. "It is . . . too . . . heavy for me!"

It was interesting that it hadn't been bounced off.

Perhaps . . . I can die?

"How heavy does a given tree weigh?" Farelp randomly asked.

"FARELP, STOP TALKING ABOUT THE TREE!" Bob the vehicon shouted.

And then I couldn't hear a thing.

I don't know how long it lasted.

But it ended with a short pop.

"She is gone." Came Shockwave's voice. "

"Gone?" Farelp said, in shock. "Just like that . . ." His voice lowered. "Humans are intricate beings."

I pushed myself upright blinking.

"Who is gone?" I said.

Instantly Bob the vehicon jumped into Third-Zero's arms with a scream.

"SHE IS A ZOMBIE!" Bob the vehicon screamed

"This is illogical." Shockwave said.

I looked down noticing a electrical jolt from my chest and a long thin metal item coming out of where Shockwave's servo should be. My chest had metal parts. I had a cage around my heart which was still pumping I tilted my head processing in the reasonable assumption. Then I broke out into laughter, happy, relieved laughter. I nearly fell off the berth if it wasn't for Shockwave's servos getting in the way.

"Dork." Third-Zero said,dropping Bob the vehicon with a dull expression.

I see the positive in the negative.

That is how I comfort myself.

And a main reason why I am so happy-go-lucky around the Decepticons.

"What is so funny?" Bob the vehicon asked.

"I CAN DIE, I CAN DIE, I CAN DIIIEE!" I shouted, jumping up and down waving my arms which smacked against Shockwave's faceplate. T--thud,c--cal-lick, sie--up. "Ooops--" I went dead silent seeing the optic had gone. "Oh, erm, um, eradicons find that optic!"

"I am blind," Shockwave said. "You . . . have obviously grown in size."

The three Vehicons bent down and searched for the rogue optic.

I noticed my shirt no longer fit me so I tore it off including my pants and panties.  It turns out I have armor now. My fingers were rather long and silver. I could tell that I had the vehicle mode of a cybertronian jet. I knew that because I feel a set of jet wings on my back. I looked over my shoulder to see in fact that I did have them.  I noticed my cybertronian skin was a lighter shade of gray, I had a dark shade of gray for my theme color and what is apparently dark red for my secondary color. It is quite interesting noticing my hands are similar in design to the sport gloves design for many of the Autobot characters in Transformers Animated.

"Found it!" Bob the vehicon said.

Bob the vehicon handed the bulb to Shockwave.

Shockwave screwed the bulb back in.

"This is not logical," Shockwave said. "You do not share any resemblance to your human half."

I frowned.

"Oh?" I said. "And how is it not logical I am getting taller?"

I closed the lid to my heart.

Starscream's christmas present: check!

"You were a human figure that was cyber-organic," Shockwave said. "I must report this to Megatron--"

"Nnnnonononono!" I said, shaking my hands

"Why?" Shockwave asked.

"BECAUSE I GOT STARSCREAM'S CHRISTMAS PRESENT, DAMN IT!" I said. "I do know I am annoying you all so . . . why not approach Starscream and have him rip out my heart? If I am becoming cybertronian then logically my human organs must be removed. He would have killed my human half. Isn't that all logical,Mr Spock?"

"Yes." Shockwave said.

Shockwave hesitated.

"No," Shockwave said. "You can't be growing a spark!"

"I am what?" I asked.

Shockwave brought over a machine that was a lot like a X-Ray scanner with a monitor on the backside. I looked over to see a beating heart that was surrounded by what seemed to be plasma like energy that appeared to be cackling growing in and then out varying in size. I could see my lungs being squeezed in and out  connected to the bronchus tubes. It was strange to see my internal organs working in harmony not breaking apart as seen in Scifi movies whenever I do see them. I looked up toward Shockwave with eyes wide.

"This is impossible." I agreed.

I am impossible.

NOW WHAT IN THE SLAG IS GOING ON?

I sigh.

"Shockwave, do we still have time to make everyone presents?" I asked.

"Yes." Shockwave said, sliding the scanner away.

"You just nearly died and all you can think about is Christmas?" Bob the vehicon panicked. "You are mad!"

I got off the berth.

"Oh, and we got a couple trees to decorate!" I said.

Like three.

The ship had been decorated in christmas decorations constructed by vehicons. If there is one thing I want to enlighten the Decepticons on is the spirit of christmas.  Then I will be out of their processors, really, and just maybe they will have  a blast. Shockwave prevented me from leaving using his arm while the vehicons were bickering.

"Megatron should be aware of the transformation you are undergoing." Shockwave said.

"No," I said. "That will spoil Screamer's present."

"Logically, you must."

"Look, I don't live my life on logic and I just follow where the action goes," I said. "If you don't follow through then I will tell Soundwave of your little obsession of Starscream in a tutu and inquire why he has sent a image all over the network."

"That is blackmail." Shockwave said.

"What blackmail?" I asked. "I am not mailing darkness to everyone."

"You know what I meant." Shockwave said.

"Shockwave," I said. "This is likely going to be the only Christmas you'll have with me aboard this ship."

"What makes you say that?" Shockwave asked.

"Nightmares." I said, in a low voice.

"Nightmares of what?" Shockwave inquired.

"Nightmares of the Decepticons being tortured about my whereabouts," I said, in a low voice. "I am going to find Lockdown on my own after Christmas." Shockwave lowered his arm. "I . . . Just . . . want to go without leaving everyone hurt because  I leave. Nobody should be hurt due to my departure. I am going to . . ." I tapped my digits together. "Stage my own departure. For the sake of everyone. I already have talked to Soundwave--"

Shockwave grabbed me by the shoulders.

"Your logic is illogical," Shockwave said. "Lockdown is dead.  He has been dead for  a very long time."

 I shook my head.

"I just can't do it," I said. "Watch them get tortured because of me. I can't do it anymore. I can't close my eyes and try to sleep without seeing them dangling upside down bleeding blue energon with holes dotting their armor. Looking like they were interrogated and tortured!" I raised my voice that was starting to break into sobs. "I want to leave without any strings attached!"

Shockwave let go of my shoulders frozen there by shock.

I ran out of Shockwave's lab.

I can be mellow and sad in my most serious moments.

I went to cry in private.