Megan wasn't really looking for Connor. Nope, not at all. She had had plenty of time over the weekend to think about her fight with him and everything preceding and succeeding it and all she wanted now was to apologise to Connor for her outburst. So, yeah she wasn't really looking for him but if she didn't find him soon, she would resort to some drastic measure to locate him. The comms unit of the school came to mind. She groaned, they could still be friends, right? Friends...or whatever sunny place in the hierarchy of relationships they had reached in their time together.

"He'll be near his locker, hopefully," Jessica said, walking beside her. "And if you haven't scared him too much, maybe he'll talk you."

"Maybe?" Megan looked at her best friend. "You're heartless."

Jessica nodded, sipping her orange juice, "That's why you like me."

"And cruel. And narcissistic," Megan grumbled.

"Are you sure we're still talking about me?"

"I hate you, Jessica!"

"But I love you," came the sly reply.

Megan huffed and stopped beside Connor's locker, "I think you're really enjoying this."

"The part where you finally realize that you should think before you tantrum? Or the part where you apologize to another member of our species?" Jessica laughed. "Hell yeah."

"Oi, Summers, is Megan rubbing off on you? You don't sound as sickly sweet as usual."

Jessica rolled her eyes at the sound of the cocky voice. She turned around to direct a steely look at Harley, "What do you want, Ollival? I hope it's not another punch to your grossly out of proportion of an ego."

"Shush, you know you love me," he winked.

"Ugh."

"Hey, Jackson," he smiled, genuinely, turning away from Jess.

"Harley, hey."

"Okay, that's my cue," Jessica grimaced. "I'm out of here."

Harley put a hand on her shoulder to stop her, "No, no, please stay. I want an audience."

"For what?" Megan asked while Jessica glared at his hand. Harley pulled back his hand back, looking half-scared of the ferocious look on her face.

He quickly shook it off though. "Everyone, gather around. I, Harley Ollival, am doing a purely selfless deed today. God, you better be watching." He paused for a dramatic moment before handing her a bundle of folded blue pages.

Megan looked at him with wide eyes, "A-are those-?"

"Lover boy's love letters? Yep, indeed, in the flesh," he smirked.

She took the bundle slowly, "How?"

"When you had that massive and totally embarrassing fight, I picked them up from the floor. Purely for entertainment purposes at first-"

Megan caught of his collar, "If you even think of hurting him with whatever evil scheme you have, I swear to God, I will kill you!"

He looked amused, "Let me finish, darling. As I said, I was thinking in purely entertainment terms when I picked it up. Reading it was another story. I just read one or two, okay? Don't hit me! I'll tell the Principal, who, by the way, can't very happy with your recent behaviour. Anyway, I thought you would like to read them since they're all addressed to you. So, yeah, you're welcome."

She looked at him suspiciously before letting go of his collar.

He leaned forward, closing the distance between them very quickly. She stiffened wondering what the hell he was planning now.

"Thank you," he whispered, "for that night. We're even now." He pressed his lips on her cheeks for the smallest fraction of a second and before she even knew it, he was walking away.

"Harley," she shouted.

He stopped, turning back with his hands in his pockets looking as if he hadn't done anything unusual, "Yeah, Jackson?"

"You're an asshole but there's hope for improvement, okay?"

He shrugged, "Anything else, love, from that acid tongue of yours?"

"Thanks, jerk!"

"Whatever, loser."

...

Reading those letters was tough. At first she couldn't read them. Even the mere sight of them was strange, uneasy, reminding her of Connor, making her uncomfortable with feelings she couldn't understand. So much had changed since the first of those notes had found its way to her locker and so much of Megan had once hinged on them and the identity of their writer that she was now scared of facing them.

There was a time, not very long ago, when the idea of someone writing romantic notes for her had been thrilling, enough to make her lose her otherwise very cool head over anyone who could have been the writer but now, it was different.

She knew Connor. She liked Connor and yes, there was a time when she wouldn't have believed that there would ever come a day when she would admit that she liked Connor Trent but it was the truth. She liked the guy whom she had finally got to know at the bakery, the one who went out of his way to make people happy, not even caring about himself. Like? Hell, she respected him.

And here she was, sitting on her bed after a day of those letters lying in her bag. What would she find in them? What explanations? Why did he stop? Would she find out?

Finally, she opened one, the one that sat first on the pile.

You remind me of waterfalls; beautiful, strong and enigmatic.

You remind me of the sun; warm and wonderful.

You remind me of fire; you'll burn me.

And I will still love you.

-just me.

She closed the note, feeling her vision blur with tears.

You think you'll like me but the truth is I have trouble liking myself. I am not very interesting and I've never done anything extraordinary. When I was young, I rescued a beetle from drowning...okay, that's a lame story but that's the most heroic thing I have ever done, I guess.

So, it's okay, I understand why you'd think it was anyone but me writing you these but why would you think it was Harley?

He is everything I am not. For all your wit and sarcasm, I have just realized, you are as idiotically perceptible as a wall. Because I can't imagine why you'd think of him and me on the same sentence.

I don't think I'll send this one to you.

Because not only is this rude, it will probably sadden you because you like guys like him and I am not like him. I am the fucking opposite of him.

Okay, I knew I shouldn't have written more than that one note. I guess, I just like the idea of talking to you even if it's through notes and one-sided affections.

Yeah, I am not sending this to you EVER.

So, for once, I'll take the liberty of signing myself as,

Connor.

She was crying now. He was an idiot and she had been an idiot.

I like you a whole lot.

A very, very massive lot.

It's kind of a really big embarrassing crush-

The kind where I want to bring you flowers and poetry, watch movies and eat popcorn, discuss everything under the sun and tell you how beautifully wonderful you are.

-cheesy admirer of yours.

I have to keep reminding myself that someone like you can't like someone like me.

Aphrodite didn't love Hephaestus.

It's okay.

-the fault's with me.

Dear Meg

Sorry I haven't been in touch lately.

I did try but I haven't found the courage to send you any more notes. Every word I write reminds me of why I can't send them to you anymore. This is getting out of hand. I feel like I am disrupting your life and I'm sorry.

Last one, I swear.

-goodbye, me.

Megan, my love.

I don't write to you anymore

And it sucks.

-your admirer.

You probably don't remember that I used to send you notes but I wanted to tell you that we talked recently and you were perfect. I think you might not hate me as much as I thought you did.

We are working at the same bakery. That's so cool.

I wasn't stalking you, believe me. I walked in there on chance.

But I have started loving Chance since then.

Don't be mad but I had to tell you it's me.

-c.

Megan,

I know I won't really send you this. Just like the other unsent ten or twenty notes, this will stay in my locker.

It's just that we are friends now. You tell me stuff. We work together. You laugh at my jokes. My sister worships you. You hugged me. You try to get me to talk about the real stuff messing my life. I want to tell you stuff.

See, we're too close for me to spoil everything by telling you it was me all along. I mean, look at us. This is more than I ever hoped for. We're best friends (I know Jessica is your closest best friend but just let me go on, okay?) and this, whatever it is that we have is beautiful.

So what if I never tell you how much I love you? So what if I can't bring you flowers and take you on dates.

At least I get to talk to you, help you, see you smile.

You have the world's loveliest smile.

-me, who will never send this to you.

There were more, too many to count and when she had read them all, she didn't even stop to think. It was unbearable. They had become close and his words, his memories, everything just reminded of what she had had with him. She missed him and even if he didn't want anything to do with her now, she wanted to tell him that she liked him too, that his smile was the world's loveliest smile to her, that she loved it when she made him smile, that she had been crazy not to realize it sooner. She missed him, so much.

Everything that he had become to her over the time they had spent together just made his absence deeper, more painful, a looming hole in her chest. She wanted to tell him that she would do anything to spend her free time with him at the bakery, hearing him sing while making dough; to see his eyes shine.

She dialled his phone number, ready to tell him that he had been wrong to think that she couldn't love him. She already did. She just hadn't realized how much until he had stepped away from her, until she had pushed him away from herself.

His phone was switched off. She couldn't sleep an inch that night.

He felt worlds away.

...

Sorry if there are typos in this. I don't edit very well. *stares at m.i.a. editor zai*

Hope you liked this chapter and had a good bout of the feels. I'm feeling some #CONGAN coming up, what about you guys?

And to the good news I promised, here it is:

Talks and Texts will be drafted after this book is over.

How tf is that good news, you ask?

It will be drafted so that I can revamp it a bit, edit stuff, add more scenes and just make it better for you guys. I think there's going to be a title change too but who knows. So, I ask you to understand this decision and for all those re-readers (I see your comments ;)), buck up and finish before New Year because that's about when it'll probably be drafted. To all of you, if you want to read the current version of Talks and Texts for whatever reason (nostalgiaaaa), do it before it becomes the old version.

Who's excited for Talks and Texts 2.0?

For the countdown people out there, 8 more chapters to go ;) Vote, comment, share and help C&C up the rankings please <3

Lots of love and poetry, zaara ❤