Bonus! Isolation is both igniting and condemning my muse. What a trip. :)

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

My eyes shot open and in a handful of seconds, I was out of our bed and dashing across the room to our bathroom. I threw the door open and made a dive bomb for the toilet, just in time to empty out last night's dinner.

A handful of seconds passed before Obito appeared beside me, a warm hand stroking up and down my back. When I was finished, he handed me a paper towel to wipe away the drool and I gave a low groan. "I knew I shouldn't have had that fish! Naruto warned me something wanky was going on with their fish."
"You were queasy yesterday morning, too," Obito said, his brows creased with concern. "Maybe you should see a doctor. Today."

I waved my hand in a dismissive manner, moving to the sink to brush my teeth. "You worry too much. It's just food poisoning."

Haiiromaru and Shiromaru padded into our bathroom, exchanging looks. Haiiromaru moved towards me, bumping his head against my thigh. "I don't know, Mia. Maybe you should."

"You smell funny," Shiromaru barked, cocking his head and bumping against me on my other side. Obito frowned at his words.

"I'm scheduling you an appointment this afternoon," Obito decided.

I sighed. "Fine. But it's just going to be a waste of time."

Haiiromaru gave a whine. "I hate the doctors!"

"No," I said, "you hate the vet. Doctors are vets for humans. He's not going to examine you."

He perked up immediately, his tail wagging furiously. "Oh. That's okay, then."

I snorted and Obito cracked a small smile. When I was done brushing my teeth (and Obito went ahead and did his, too), the two of us traversed to the kitchen.

"I have several more meetings today with the Akatsuki. We've almost finished the plans for the westward expedition," Obito said, grinning widely at that. The Elemental Nations had always been curious of the continent in the West, but never had it been peaceful enough that a full-blown expedition was thought possible. All of the villages had been coming together and planning this. The Akatsuki would actually be leading the expedition along with many shinobi and kunoichi from each of the villages.

Obito was taking a leading part in it due to his transportation abilities. Should an emergency happen, he could instantly take the crew out of it and bring them back home.

"Okay," I said, moving to the fridge and beginning to pull out some ingredients.

Our kitchen window opened, and I didn't even look up as Kakashi climbed through the window.

"Good morning," Kakashi greeted casually.

"Morning," Obito yawned, moving over to the stove to assist me in making breakfast. "After breakfast, I just need to get dressed and then I'm heading out. Do you mind scheduling Mia for a doctor's appointment, and making sure she actually goes there, today, please?"

Kakashi nodded his head at this. "Don't worry. I'll take her there personally."

"I'm right here," I whined,

Obito rolled his eyes. "If Kakashi didn't escort you, you'd just go to the park and play with the dogs all day, citing you forgot."

I pouted, not refuting that.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

It didn't take long to make or eat breakfast. Afterwards, Obito and I kissed (okay, maybe a teeny-tiny bit more of a kiss... just a little bit...) each other goodbye, while Kakashi left the house to set up the appointment.

After Kakashi had returned, the four of us (my dogs went everywhere with me—Obito wasn't kidding when he said he wanted them to always be with me to protect me) headed out. The appointment was in the afternoon and we had several hours to kill before then.

"Jiraiya's supposed to be back in the village today," Kakashi commented, walking lazily beside me, his hands in his pockets.

I glanced over at him, blinking in surprise. "Is he? Good. It's been a while since I've seen him, and it's about time for the next Icha Icha installment."

Kakashi's eyes closed as he gave me an eye-smile. "I know. Did you know that the third book is also being made into a movie?"

I gasped. "Really?! Oooo, I can't wait now. I loved the first two movies and the third book is my favorite!"
Kakashi bobbed his head in a surprisingly enthusiastic manner (or as enthusiastic as Kakashi could get). "Same. Jiraiya wrote to me about it and already promised he would give us tickets to the premiere."
A grin split across my face. "Friggin' awesome. Seriously. Just... love you for telling me that. Oh, hey, do you mind if we stop by the academy? I think I left my jacket in my classroom."

Yes. Classroom. While I still worked at TI as their secretary, I wasn't overly needed. So long as I kept up with the paperwork and kept my space organized, everything went smoothly (and sometimes because it went so smoothly, it got a bit boring). And the teaching job was seasonal, of course, so I could juggle both jobs. Granted, times did get a bit hectic and stressful when grading the students' homework along with all the paperwork at T&I, but those times were few and far in between I could handle it.

I couldn't teach my students everything, of course. I could teach theory, mathematics, language, decoding, encoding, history, taijutsu and things of that like, but when it came to chakra, things got a bit interesting.

I could explain chakra, and tell when they were using it correctly (or incorrectly) due to my chakra-sensor abilities, but I couldn't demonstrate it. Thankfully, I had plenty of friends and children that would be all too happy to attend a class to offer some demonstrations. Naruto and Hinata especially loved it.

"How is your class this year?" Kakashi asked, glancing over at me.

"Very bright," I bragged. "At this rate, I think I might actually be able to win the bet!"

"Ah, yes. The bet between the teachers who has the brightest students. I'm pretty sure that's not very ethical," Kakashi commented.

I snorted. "The students don't mind, and a little competition is fun."
"Uh-huh."

Haiiromaru barked when the academy came into sight. There were several students outside, despite it being a weekend. From what I could see, they were playing a game. Shiromaru rubbed against me in an affectionate manner while Haiiromaru bounced all around us, getting excited to see others play.

"When we're done here, wanna catch a movie?" I asked.

"Sure," Kakashi said.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

I shifted to the balls of my feet in Tsunade's office. "You know, some people could argue that this is favoritism."

Tsunade withdrew her hand from my forehead, her chakra slowly dying away, as a spark took to her eyes. "What? I can't treat one of my friends?"
Kakashi shrugged. "She's the Hokage and if she wants to treat you, let her."

"She wouldn't be treating me in the first place if you didn't go to her," I retorted. "I know you're busy with the expedition plans."

Tsunade waved her hand in a dismissive manner. "Don't worry about it. Besides, I'm really glad he got me now."

"What is it, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked.

Tsunade's lips widened into a smug smile. "Congratulations, Mia."

I stared at her.

I blinked at her.

Then the little light went off above my head and I gasped. "Oh my God I'm pregnant?!"

Kakashi's eye widened, along with Shizune's. Tsunade nodded and I squealed with delight.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

After making the trio swear not to tell a soul, and bribing the dogs not to give anything away, I returned home to make a celebratory dinner. I asked Kakashi to go ahead and invite the gang over for dinner, so I could tell them.

Obito would be returning roughly an hour before everyone else arrived.

When he did return, he entered the kitchen and frowned. "Are we having a party or something?"

I turned around after setting in the two chickens in the oven, beaming. "Something like that. It's a celebration."

Obito suddenly looked anxious. "Is it somebody's birthday? Our anniversary isn't for a couple more months, right?"
"Calm down. It's not something you forgot about, rather it's just some very good news," I reassured him. Obito sighed with relief and I untied my apron. Folding it gently, I rested it on the kitchen table and moved towards him. My arms wrapped around his neck loosely and he folded his arms around my waist.

"Good news?" Obito asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Mm-hmm. A new addition to the family."

Obito blinked in surprise. "New addition...? Is someone getting married?"

"No," I said, slowly dragging my right hand across his arm to grab his own hand. I then carefully dragged his hand across me to rest on my belly. "Not marriage, per say..."

Obito stared at me.

Then his eyes widened and he gaped. "Wait... Mia... are you...?"

"Congratulations, 'Obi," I whispered.

"I'm going to be... a... dad...?"

"Mm-hmm."

Shiromaru and Haiiromaru both barked happily, circling around us and bumping into us affectionately.

Obito kissed me fiercely, pulling me tightly against him.

There was a knock on the door frame, and Obito pulled back long enough to glare at Kakashi who entered the kitchen. Kakashi held up his hands in a peaceful gesture. "Just thought I'd warn ya that Naruto and Hinata already arrived."

"Damn it," Obito muttered. "I don't even get a chance to celebrate this properly with my own wife?"
"Not for a little bit, at least," Kakashi said apologetically. "Maybe not for a couple nights, either. You know how everyone is."

Obito huffed. "Stupid overprotective—"

"Kaa-chan! I went ahead and let myself in. Is that husband of yours being nice, or can I kick his ass?" Naruto sung as he entered the kitchen.

I giggled while Obito shot Naruto a mild glare. "Brat."

Naruto just gave him a cheeky grin. "So what's with the big dinner? Celebrating the next Icha Icha installment or something?"

Obito's nose crinkled in disgust at that. "He's still making that crap?"

"Don't be a prude," I said, gently patting his bum. Obito's cheeks took on a bright red hue, while Naruto looked positively sick and Kakashi gave me a knowing look. I giggled. "You really need to get used to that, sweetheart."

"Anko is a horrible influence," Obito grumbled, still blushing.

"She is not," I disagreed immediately, then paused and giggled. "Okay, maybe a little."

"So then what's the big news? Why are we celebrating?" Naruto asked.

"You'll find out when everyone else gets here," I promised, exchanging looks with Obito. Obito smiled back at me, leaning forward and brushing his lips across my forehead. Our hands found each other as we turned back to the kitchen. "Now go and watch some T.V. or something. I need to finish making dinner."

"I'll help," Obito said.

Naruto gave us a curious look, but when Kakashi guided him out of the kitchen, he wisely kept his mouth shut.

Obito cocked his head thoughtfully. "Look at that. A quiet kitchen just for us."

"Naruto and Kakashi are just in the other room and there isn't a door between the rooms," I warned.

"Kakashi," Obito sung loudly.

"I've got you covered. Naruto. Let's go. We need to pick up some milk."

"What? But I just got here."

"Exactly. Now let's go."

"What are you trying to pull—hey! Give me back Gamma-chan! Kakashi!"

When the front door opened and closed twice, I cocked an eyebrow at Obito. Obito looked positively smug. "Oh. Look at that. A quiet house just for us."

"Perv," I said, grinning and pulling him close.

"Thought I was a prude?"

"Shut up and strip."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Seven months later

"Would you calm down?" I asked, smiling in fond—if a bit exasperated—amusement. Obito's brow furrowed, and he only frowned (oh, he was so pouting at my scolding). His fingers laced themselves in between mine, and he squeezed my hands. "Obito..."

"I can't help it," Obito insisted. He looked chastised for another couple moments, then he was back up, brimming and smiling. His eyes trailed down, and brightened.

"Do you want to listen to him, again?" I asked, bemused.

"May I?"

"Last time, then I really need to get up and use the bathroom. Your son seems to believe my bladder is a soccer ball."

"That's my boy. Annoy the heck outta your mother, because I can't do that anymore. Apparently she can make me sleep on the couch now."

I grinned wickedly. "Damn straight."

Obito chuckled and scooted back a bit on the couch. He leaned his head down and pressed an ear against my round belly. His face became screwed up in concentration as he wholly focused on listening to the second heartbeat inside.

I withdrew one of my hands away from his hand, and I placed it over on top of his head, gently running my fingers through his hair.

Several moments of contented silence passed by, before the front door opened. "I'm back, and I've got milk."

"Welcome home," I returned, looking up as Kakashi entered the living room. He gave me an eye-smile in return. "Thanks again for doing the milk run!"

"Not an issue," Kakashi assured me. "I know that Obito doesn't want to be away from you at this moment—completely understandably so, given the circumstances."

"'Given the circumstances,'" I quoted back. "I'm pregnant. Honestly, between Obito's paranoia (and clingy-ness due to said paranoia—by the way, your encouragement of it is not helping), and your clinical-ness, you'd think I was on a deathbed, or something."

Obito suddenly seized. "Don't joke about that. You and our son will be fine. You and our son will be fine."

As Obito started to repeat that like a mantra, I tried to soothe him, while simultaneously continuing my conversation with Kakashi.

"I happened across Naruto at the store, too. He told me that Nagato told him the rest of the Akatsuki have arrived in Konoha. Everyone's officially gathered for your due date," Kakashi said.

"Shh, Obito. Do I need to get your anxiety pills? That's wonderful, Kakashi, thanks for telling me that. Ah, do you want to listen to your godson, too?"

Kakashi cocked his head, shrugged, then looked down and shuffled his feet. The perfect picture of forced nonchalance. My lips twitched into a smirk, and I patted my belly. Kakashi shuffled closer and then sat down on the floor beside the couch. He rested his head on my belly, and Obito scooted over to give him some room.

"I don't need any damn pills," Obito grumbled.

"Mm-hmm," I hummed. We lapsed into a comfortable silence for a few minutes, 'til I cleared my throat. "Okay. Enough listening to our baby. I have to pee."

They sighed in perfect unison, both standing up. After they stood up, Obito effortlessly lifted me off the couch and up onto my sore feet. Kakashi gave us another eye-smile, before bading us goodnight, and then heading up to his apartment, a floor above us.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

One month later

Naruto fluttered around me, his brow furrowed. "Kaa-chan, are you sure you should be walking? You look like you're going to pop if something sharp touches you!"

It was a lovely day outside. Even if I was uncomfortable walking around being as pregnant as I was. Comfy sweats could really only bring so much comfort when each step taken friggin hurt. Not that I would admit that to my husband or anyone around me. So much as a peep and I would be carried for the remainder of my pregnancy.

And after the bathroom incident I would not run that risk again. I understood being pregnant ran the risk of struggling with bladder control but it was still super embarrassing! Not to mention I couldn't even get up from the toilet on my own anymore. Obito had to install rails.

I sighed. "Sweetie... thank you, so very much, for that mental image. I'm fine. I have you guys with me, don't I?"

"For once, I think I might agree with the idiot," Sasori said distastefully. Sakura nodded her head in agreement, adjusting her grip on the picnic basket.

"Yeah, come on, you... crazy-hen," Hidan said. He had been careful to limit his word choice around me, since discovering I was pregnant. Apparently Jashinism favored mothers. Go figure. I had a funny feeling he would use twice as many words (as if to make up for lost time) after the baby came, though.

"I won't be walking very far," I insisted, glaring defiantly at the many faces that stared back at me dubiously. "And I'm not due for another week. Tsunade-sama is very good at her job."

"I don't know," Obito said, giving me an uneasy look. He wrapped an arm around my waist, and pulled me a bit tighter against him. "Maybe we should have this picnic after he comes."

"This is our anniversary for the end of the war," I protested. "We have to have it today. Come on guys, please?"

Ino snorted. "Oh, let her have her fun. She won't get this chance after the baby comes, right, senpai?"

Deidara nodded. "That's right, un. Besides, it's not often all of us can make it for this gathering."

Hinata placed a gentle hand on Naruto's arm. "Naruto-kun, calm down. Kaa-chan will be fine."

Naruto awarded his girlfriend with a skeptical look. She squeezed his arm and smiled, and he finally sighed. "Okay..."

I shook my head. "Good grief."

I could only hope we would have a peaceful time at the park up ahead for our reunion.

How wrong I turned out to be.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

"Watch where you're throwing that thing!" Obito shouted, as he narrowly dodged the Frisbee. Sasuke rolled his eyes, catching it from a little behind Obito and throwing it back to Ino and Deidara. After arriving at the park, the younger generation had split off into two teams and started a rather vicious game of Frisbee Tag. Poor Chōji had already been knocked unconscious when Hidan body-tackled him to prevent him from catching the Frisbee.

Obito was glowering darkly at them, pointedly positioning himself so his body was in between them and me.

"Obito, would you relax?" I asked, rolling my eyes.

Obito glanced over at me, and sighed, then nodded his head. "Yeah, alright."

"Come here," I said, gesturing towards me. Obito sat beside me and buried his face against the crook of my neck. I giggled, and I could feel him smiling against me. Kakashi sat on my other side, pulled out his favorite book, and started to read it.

Kakashi shadowing us was, sadly, something of norm now.

Sasuke leapt up and caught the Frisbee before hurling it towards Naruto. Naruto dive bombed towards it, but Kiba tackled into his legs. "Fuck!"

"Language," I chided absently, watching in fond amusement as Sakura proceeded to use Naruto as a stepping stone, and leapt up to catch the Frisbee. However, she soon found herself fighting against Ino in mid-air. With little choice, Sakura swung her leg out and kicked at the Frisbee, but she mustn't have had a good aim, seeing how it was sent hurtling straight towards us.

Obito spasmed, and then proceeded to launch himself in front of me.

I blinked in surprise when it actually connected against his forehead with a resounding smack.

The Frisbee fell lamely to the ground, and Obito straightened up, his eyebrow twitching. My eyes widened as I realized that Sakura had kicked the Frisbee hard enough that when it connected against Obito's forehead, it had actually drawn blood.

"Listen here, you little shits," Obito began, standing up. Kakashi immediately stood up next to him, slapping his book shut, "I think it's time I taught you all some manners."

"This sounds like fun," Kisame said, standing up from his spot beside Itachi, and grinning maniacally.

Naruto snorted, folding his arms across his chest. "What? Old guys like you? Please. Bring it on."

As the Konoha Twelve flanked together, along with Deidara, Hidan, and Sasori (Sasori, probably only because Sakura was on that side), the rest of the Akatsuki, along with their senseis moved to stand beside Obito.

"Oh, dear," was all I said, and then all hell broke loose.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

I stared at the completely destroyed park. After the declaration of war, a brutal sparring match began. It eventually escalated into a free-for-all with no clear lines of alliances. Many had fallen unconscious by this point, or bowed out. Itachi was one of these, as he decided to stay out of it and make sure no stray attack managed to hit me.

"Tsunade-sama is going to murder them," I commented as I watched Naruto slam a Rasengan in the spot where Kakashi once was. Obito used this time to deliver a direct kick against the boy's midsection... only for him to disappear in a puff of smoke, thus signaling it was a clone.

Itachi thought about this for a moment. "Perhaps. Perhaps not. I think it is more likely that she only maims them."

Nagato sighed, he and Konan sat on the other side of me. "She will probably want us to pay for it."

"The brats can pay for it," Kakuzu growled from behind us. "It was their carelessness that started this in the first place."

"Or Obito's over protectiveness," Itachi lamented.

I sighed. "I love my husband. I really, really do, but..."

Konan reached over and patted my shoulder sympathetically.

Suddenly, I felt a distinct tightness around the baby, and my lower section. I let out a small gasp of surprise.

"Mia-chan?" Konan inquired.

I held up a finger, my brow furrowed thoughtfully. The cramping was intensifying, and it was certainly uncomfortable. A heartbeat passed, and then it died down... but not without leaving something behind.

Uncaring of my surroundings, I spread my legs, and pulled back my sweatpants. "Huh."

"Is something wrong?" Itachi asked.

"My water broke," I said, peering at the wetness. "Or I just wet myself, but it doesn't smell like urine, so..."

The reactions were immediate. Itachi effortlessly disappeared—undoubtedly to prepare the hospital, or get Tsunade—while Konan pushed Nagato away and grasped my hand. Nagato stood up and used his famous kekkai genkai to push all the fighters down, and thus draw their attention.

"What the hell was that for?!" Naruto howled.

"Mia's water broke," Nagato said calmly.

In a split second, Obito had come to my side and picked me up, Kakashi right at his heel. Everyone else was already moving, running really, to the hospital where Obito would take me. I winced at the uncomfortable tightening sensation, and Obito gave me a worried look.

I smiled faintly at him. "Don't worry, I'll be fine."

"Alright," Obito said, resting his forehead against mine. "I'll hold you to that."

"Mn!"

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Five hours later

"SWEET VIDEO GAME KING SOMEONE GIVE ME SOME GODDAMN DRUGS!" I screamed.

"S-Sweetheart, you know that given your chakra-issue, and how fragile the baby's system is, we can't risk giving you drugs," Obito said hesitantly, his eyes wide with worry.

I cringed. FUCK

"Don't worry, Mia-chan. This'll only last... six more hours, maybe," Tsunade said.

I gave her a loathing look, then cried out when another contraption hit. "Fuckmefuckmefuckme—"

"Is there nothing we can do?" Obito asked Tsunade anxiously. "I've never seen her in so much pain..."

"She'll be fine," Tsunade dismissed.

Obito gave Tsunade a very dry look. "Yes. Because clearly this is fine."

Tsunade's eyes narrowed. "Who's the trained medical kunoichi here?"

Obito muttered, "Technically I know medical—"

Tsunade's eyebrow twitched. "Out."

"What?" Obito asked, seizing up.

"Out. You're distracting me."

"You can't just kick me out!" Obito protested. "This is my wife—"

"And my friend. You aren't needed for a while longer, if anything you're distracting—"

"—She needs the distractions—"

"—I think I know what she needs more than you—"

"FOR GOD'S SAKE STOP FIGHTING OR I'LL KICK BOTH OF YOU OUT."

They both fell silent, but still glared at each other. I groaned. "Obito, please... relax... I-I will be—fffffuckthathurts—fine."

Obito's brow furrowed. "But—"

"Your worry is endearing, b-but you're g-going to make me f-flustered if you keep this up," I panted.

"Sorry," Obito winced.

The door opened and Sakura, and Shizune entered the room, dressed in similar attire to Tsunade. Sakura chirped, "Don't worry, Mia-chan. We're here for you."

"N-No need to reassure me," I wheezed.

The three women pointedly stared at a sheepish Obito.

"I'll be fine," Obito said, though he sounded more confident than he looked.

"Uh-huh."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Ten hours later

I was breathing heavily when the cry pierced through the air. Exhaustion pressed heavily upon me and pretty much everything below the waist felt like it had been put in a damn wood shredder then set on fire.

But, in that instant none of that mattered anymore. Because Tsunade had a blue-wrapped bundle in her arms and was approaching me. I tiredly lifted my arms, inwardly wincing at the line of sweat that shone on me.

Gently, Tsunade placed the baby in my arms.

He was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

He was pink, squishy, and wiggly, with a tiny spot of black hair curling at the top of his head. His mouth was opened and he was making these little squeaking noises as he squirmed.

I swallowed roughly, my eyes burning. Beside me, the bed sunk in a bit as Obito sat beside me. An arm was wrapped around my shoulders, and I leaned weakly into Obito. With another hand, he carefully brushed my hair out of my eyes, wiping away some of the sweat.

"Hi," I whispered softly towards my—our—son.

He made a cooing sound, and I dragged my eyes up to Obito. His eyes were unnaturally bright, and he had a huge smile on his face. Our eyes met, and his smile grew. "Thank you, Mia."

"Thank you, Obito," I responded, and then I looked back down. "He's beautiful."

Obito lifted one of his hands and softly brushed his finger against our son's cheek. "He is."

"Ryo," I said. "That's his name now, isn't it?"

"Mn. Uchiha Ryō."

Neither of us paid much attention as the doctors left the room.

It didn't matter anymore.

Welcome to the family, Ryō.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Obito bounced Ryō in his arms, easily keeping the infant fast asleep. We were all released from the hospital the following morning—after everyone got a chance to meet our newest family member, naturally.

Ryo, of course, had his own room, but Obito and I thought it would be best if he slept in our room while he was still so young. So we brought his large red, and blue cradle into our room, and it was filled with soft blankets and pillows.

Obito carefully set Ryō inside, and I leaned over and kissed the top of his forehead. Ryō squirmed for a moment, but didn't awake, and I pulled the blankets over him.

Obito and I stood back for a moment, and then Obito pulled me close to him and kissed me fiercely.

"I want another one," Obito said.

"My vagina says that's not happening for a while," I snorted.

Obito pouted.

I yawned, and Obito's expression softened. "... Let's get you into bed."

"Mmk," I mumbled. I waddled over to our large bed, and flopped over. Obito smirked, but effortlessly pulled the blankets out from under me and tucked me in. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Obito responded. "Now go to sleep."

"Not gonna join me?'

Obito shrugged sheepishly.

"You want to watch our son sleep, don't you?"

"He's so cute," Obito confessed.

"Good grief, you're turning into more of a woman than I am," I moaned.

"Shuddup," Obito retorted brilliantly. "Or else there might not be any more chocolate left when you wake up."

"How dare you."

Obito grinned at me. "Go to sleep."

"Whatever..."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Three weeks later

Ryo gurgled happily at me, raising his arms up and trying to grab my bangs. I giggled and lowered my head and nuzzled him affectionately.

"So this is the new brat?"

My head snapped up. "X?!"

"The one and only," X said, stepping into the room from the window. "How have you been, my favorite prostitute?"

"Fairly well. Did you want to meet Ryō-chan?"

"Partly," X admitted, stepping close and peering at Ryō. With a black gloved hand he poked his cheek. "Also partly because I wanted to kidnap you again."

I considered this. "Obito would have a panic attack if I didn't tell him where I was going."

X held up a can of red spray paint. "Don't worry, I got this."

"I'm sure," I said dryly. "Just as long as it can be washed off."

"Of course," X responded. He walked over to our large bedroom window and proceeded to write out:

Loser,

I kidnapped your wife.

Love,

X

I shook my head. "I don't have a sitter ready, so we'll have to take Ryō with us."

"Fine by me," X answered, then draped an arm around my shoulder. "Adventure awaits!"

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Third Person POV – Obito

Obito carried a couple of the grocery bags, with Kakashi, and Itachi carrying the rest. The trio walked in relative companionable silence, content.

Obito shifted all the bags over to one hand, and with the other hand he opened the door to their apartment. "Mia-chan, I'm home, and I got the diapers... Mia-chan?"

Silence greeted him, and Itachi moved past him to put away the groceries.

Frowning, as he had a very bad feeling, Obito carefully entered their bedroom.

He then turned his head and saw the message on the window.

"... Kakashi."

"I know a good place to bury the body."

"Good."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

First Person POV – Mia's

"Thanks for the lunch, X," I called out, waving goodbye to my friend. X gave a mock bow, before he disappeared again. Ryō giggled at me, and I adjusted my grip on him, smiling down at him. We didn't really go on adventure—X said when Ryō was old enough, he would be more than happy to play the crazy uncle and take him on all sorts of interesting adventures.

Which, I had to admit, partially terrified me, and made me happy. X had done a very good job at making our adventures pretty safe, and I knew he would be careful with Ryō, but still... Ryō was my baby boy.

Anyway, X just took us out to a quiet little café a couple villages away, and we debated upon what would be the best cover story that would fit in Ryō.

It was a toss-up between the long-lost son of Madara and (Lilly)Sasori who had, like his mother, been swept up and away due to events unforeseen and ended up in a different timeline... and the Sage of Six Paths reborn.

After lunch (which he did pay for), he dropped us back off at the entrance to our apartment. To be honest, I would be surprised if Obito actually made it home before the whole ordeal was over. With a hum, I pushed our door open and stepped in to find myself face to face with an annoyed Itachi.

"You're in a lot of trouble," Itachi told me.

"What did I do?" I whined.

"We came home to find X kidnapped you, again, with Ryō. How do you think your husband is taking it?"

"Hilariously?"

Itachi considered this. "... A little, yes, but also very, very, unhappily."

"He should know by now that X isn't going to hurt me," I sighed. "Where is he?"

"I will send out a summoning crow to bring him back here," Itachi said.

"Thank you."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

"Uchiha Mia."

"Hi, honey," I said, then winced under his dark glare. "I can explain?"

"Where's Ryō?"

"Asleep in his crib."

"Explain yourself."

I shook my head, giving him an amused look. "I had lunch with a friend that took way too much pleasure in teasing you."

Obito folded his arms across his chest. "You had lunch with a criminal that kidnapped you for Orochimaru."

"Who also saved my life from Kabuto," I retorted. "And technically he helped rescue me from Orochimaru, too. He's not a bad person, Obito."

Obito snorted dubiously.

I smiled coyly at him. "You worry too much."

"Do not," Obito muttered stubbornly.

"Mm-hmm," I responded patronizingly.

Obito glowered at me.

My smile grew and I sauntered over to him, throwing my arms around his neck. "I am sorry I worried you. I really thought we wouldn't be gone long enough to do that. But, if it bugs you that much, I promise not to go off on any more 'adventures' with X without you."

Obito relaxed. "Promise?"

"Promise," I agreed, pressing my lips gently against his. A warmth fluttered inside of me, spreading from the tips of my toes, to the tip of my nose when he returned it. We pulled back for a moment, and Obito smiled warmly at me. "Thank you for going shopping, by the way."

"Happy to help," Obito responded sincerely. "How are you feeling, by the way?"

"Better," I answered. "Although X and I did discover something interesting about our son."

Obito tilted his head. "What do you mean?"

"He sneezes fire."

Obito chortled. "That's awesome."

"So you say now until he sneezes on you," I grumbled.

"Did he sneeze on you?"

"No. But he set our table on fire."

Obito chuckled. "Our little pyro."

"Mm-hmm."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Two months later

Sakura bounced Ryō up and down in her lap. "Sasori-sensei, isn't he adorable?"

"Mm," Sasori grunted, eyeing the babbling toddler.

I smiled at the duo. "How has your training been, Sakura-chan?"

Sakura beamed. "Wonderful! Sasori and Kakuzu are taking me hunting tomorrow so I can have my first completely human puppet."

"I... see. Congratulations, then. I take it it'll be a missing-nin?"

"It'll have to be, given our alliances," Sasori muttered. "It would be so much easier if we could just bait an ANBU member, though."

"Naruto would never allow it," I laughed.

"True enough," Sakura sighed.

Ryo sneezed, fire blowing out of his mouth, but Sakura had already turned him around to face away from her. Sakura rummaged through her pockets before she pulled out a napkin and dabbed at the bit of ash that had managed to dust itself on his nose.

Ryo giggled.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Six months later

With Ryō now fast asleep, I stretched out in my green shirt. The sleeves were wide and loose at the end, and the actual shirt stretched down to my mid-thighs, so I was able to wear it without pants. Not that I normally did—it was mostly just a sleeping, or lounging in shirt at home.

I laid down on our large bed, and curled up, yawning tiredly. Sleep tempted me like hot chocolate on a cool day, but I resisted. The light was still on, and I was waiting for Obito.

I wasn't sure how long I waited—a minute, maybe more?—before Obito re-entered our bedroom in his all-black cloak. He smiled at me. "Sorry I'm late, Mia-chan. Took longer than I thought it would to find an open store with diapers."

"It's fine." I assured him tiredly. "Next time, let's just keep an extra set in Kakashi's apartment."

"Sounds like a plan," Obito said. He shifted to the heels of his feet, before moving to kneel beside the bed. He stretched out a hand, and his fingers brushed along my cheek before tucking my hair behind my ear. I turned my head and kissed the palm of his hand, reaching up and grasping it. His eyes softened. "Go to sleep, Mia. I'll take care of our son for the night and morning. I don't need as much sleep as you do."

"Then you can at least sleep until he wakes up again," I mumbled, my voice husky from the grogginess settling over me. Obito gave an affirmative hum, and then moved to turn off the light. With the light off, he discarded his cloak and shirt, and then climbed into bed. He crawled over to me, and I reached up, wrapping my arms around his neck and bringing his face to mine.

Smiling coyly, I said, "But, hey, if you're going to take care of him, then I can sleep in tomorrow... Which means I don't need to go to sleep right away..."

"Hmm. What do you know... you don't," Obito purred.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

One month later

"Thank you so much for agreeing to babysit," I chirped, kissing each of them on the cheek. Obito chuckled at my mood, and when I was done, he started to wrap his scarf around me.

"Happy to help, Kaa-chan," Naruto said, grinning.

Ryu cooed as he reached up at Kakashi's mask and started tugging at it. The ex-ANBU shinobi awkwardly shifted his arms and gently pulled the baby's hands back away from his face.

"Enjoy your night out," Sasuke said solemnly.

"We'll be back later, then," Obito, now wrapping the scarf around himself. "You all know where the food and whatnot is."

"See you later, darlings," I said.

"Shoo," Kakashi said. "Enjoy your date night. We'll hold the fort down."

Obito and I exchanged smiles before heading out.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

It was halfway through the movie when the urge hit me.

I started to fidget, my brow furrowing. Obito immediately noticed and turned his head at me, raising an eyebrow. I leaned towards him, pressing my lips against his ear and whispering. "I have a bad feeling."

Obito chuckled, then lifted the arm rest between us. He put his arm around me and pulled me in, kissing the top of my head. "Don't be silly. Our son is in the middle of Konoha. The Akatsuki are right next door. He's with three people who love him and are more than capable of protecting him."

"But..."

"He's with Naruto, Sasuke, and... Kakashi..." Obito trailed off. "... They all... mean well... but... they have a habit of killing those they love..."

Obito seized, his eyes widening. "Mia, we need to go home."

"Oh, Obito, I don't think it's that bad," I whispered quickly.

"Naruto means well!" Obito protested, "But he's an idiot, and Kakashi has horrible luck."

"Sasuke's with them," I objected weakly, trying to reassure both of us. "He's not an idiot, and he's not that unlucky."

Obito gave me a look.

"We can't just show up after being gone for only an hour," I said, gnawing on my bottom lip. "They'll think we don't trust them."

"We don't."

"Why don't we just swing by Sakura and Sasori's place and ask them to check by our place?" I suggested.

Obito blinked. "That's... acceptable. Sakura, while insane, is a responsible young girl and can keep the boys in place. Leave now and come back to the movie?"

"The sooner the better," I agreed.

Little did we know that at that very moment Ryō had sneezed fire on the curtains while no one was watching and our apartment was being burned down.

They were not allowed to babysit again.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Tiny little bonus of Mia 'bout to scold Obito:

"Oh for the love of... Here, take your godson," I sighed, shoving Ryō into Kakashi's arms. My eyes narrowed into slits as I began to approach my husband darling dearest. Obito gulped nervously, smiling anxiously. "Obito..."

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

This was sporadic, so apologies for the typos or inconsistencies.

Hope y'all have a lovely night.

Reviews are love!