Ben finally decided to come out of "hiding". He is getting more used to being the supreme leader, though it isn't what he wants, so he might as well learn to deal with it. It's not like he has been happy with where he's been the past 10 years, so it's nothing new.

Everyone already kinda knew he was hiding, because you could still hear his little tantrum he throws every now and then. Highly doubt they would have thought it was some animal in there... well, an animal that isn't human.

The First Order was still recovering from the loss of most of their troops, and the "possible" death of Captain Phasma. No one has seen her, but there's a chance she could still be alive. It was a mess. Dealing with promoting people, fixing things and figuring out how the hell they are gonna get half their men back. It's not like they can just clone 5,000 guys in a year...

Hux was opting for Ben to get a new uniform. Something that can really say he's "Supreme". But, of course Ben, being the difficult one, he threw Hux into a wall. Again.

But should I even say again? Hell this has most definitely happened more than once or twice.

Everyone was still calling him "Kylo" or "Supreme leader Ren". No one knew about this whole Ben thing. He didn't want anyone to know obviously, because water that's left of the FO will probably kill him within seconds. Doubt anyone would care, though.

-

It's only been 3 days since Ben and Rey's last encounter, which was their first time talking since Crait. Rey was obviously still mad, but wasn't going to hold a grudge. Just needed a few days process things.

He has tried "skyping" her a few times, but every time  he's tried she wouldn't do it. Hell he even worked out a few times and went shirtless. Who's dumb enough to not wanna see that? Stupid loser. Maybe he didn't  even want to see her anyways.

-

It was about 3am, Ben was in bed, wide awake. He really doesn't sleep, always scared that Rey would wanna talk and he wouldn't be awake to answer. But she doesn't even wanna talk, so what's the point? there's 0.1% chance, but at the same time that 0.1% is still important.

He could tell Rey was probably reading his thoughts. He keeps his mind open all day, letting her have an easy access into his mind. Not like she could do any damage.

Somehow, he still had his helmet. It just ended up in his room one day, no idea how it got there. He looked over at it, feeling a slight pain in his chest. All these memories and thoughts crashed down on him all at once.

Alas, you're no Vader. you're just a child in a mask.

But the children he's killed while wearing that mask. The lives he took while wearing that mask. The pleasure he took from making people suffer while wearing that mask. It's like the only thing that mask did was hide the ugliest thing. Guilt.

He gave up everything. The future that he had in front of him. Was it really for nothing?

The things he did to become the almighty Kylo Ren. He pretty much gave up his life, can he really turn back at this point? No one would really forgive him.

Murderous snake

She wasn't wrong. He really deserved it.

How does he change this? How does he go from slaughtering innocent women and children, to being the most loved, supportive man in the galaxy? He doesn't want the first order nor the resistance, just to restart. Put the past behind him. Forget everything and just run away with Rey. Maybe even start something new?

A fresh start really sounds nice.

-

Rey could tell when he wanted to talk. For the past three days all she really did was sit in her room, listening to his thoughts. That's not weird, right?

She felt how sad he got when he wanted to talk. Can he really not handle three days? I mean, come on. Anyways, she really wanted to talk to him as well, but that probably isn't a good idea. No one knows how Ben really is , if he says he's against the FO, no one would probably believe him until he proved it, but how would he prove it? Is she really gonna have to help?

So many questions at this point. Wish it could be solved by just sitting down and talking everything out. That would be a big help.

HEYO IM SO SORRY ABOUT NOT UPDATING!!! kinda busy with life, but yanno. i'm still working on updating my other stories, so those should hopefully be updated when this updates. so sorry!!

hope you guys enjoyed!! also if you haven't heard, the episode nine script is already finished and filming will begin end of july, 2018!!!