Chapter 5:

                "So are you going to tell me what happened at work?" Punk asks as he walks up to Carson sitting down on the couch right beside her, she looks in the other direction debating whether or not to bring it up things were awkward enough as it was.

                 "You don't have to pretend you care." Her words were slightly true, obviously he didn't really care how her day was but it did bother him to see the life in her gone. The glow she used to have radiate off of her is no longer there, and a certain sadness appear in her eyes.

               "I do care, come on tell Punky what happened..." he pouts placing his head on her shoulder giving her his best puppy dog eyes, she glances over at him trying to hold back the smile wanting to come through. Phil was very confusing one minute he was an arrogant jerk, than the next he was the sweetest guy in the world, bipolar much?

                 Phillip listens intently as Carson struggles to tell the story of the beautiful little girl who died way to young, he was touched at how she has only known the girl for a month and was so close to her. "Sometimes we lose the best of people at a young age, Cars. Be thankful God took her out of her misery she is in a better place, finally cancer free..."

                  For the first time someone actually said something that put her heart at rest, she looks ups into his dark eyes as the tears bead hers. Phil stares back wondering what she was going to say or do, burying her face in his neck they hug. "Thank you..." she whispers, pulling back still feeling that fire between them.

               "Welcome..." she kept her head on his chest as they watch the TV, Phil couldn't take his eyes off of her it was so interesting to feel accepted by someone with no strings attached. "Carson?" He whispers noticing her breathing really slowed down, he slowly leans forward to look at her face an seen her fast asleep. "Sweet dreams." He whispers into her hair kissing the top of her head before gently placing his head on top of hers falling asleep as well.

             "So tired." Selene groans placing her key into her lock, twisting she pushes the door open and stops in her tracks. Phillip and Carson were cuddling on the couch, narrowing her eyes she rushes over flicking Punks ear.

             "Ow," he says grabbing his ear and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, "What was that for?" he groans seeing his sister standing over him with her hands on her hips giving him the stink eye.

             "I told you not to flirt with her."

             "I didn't, I helped her and she fell asleep, completely innocent. It didn't even get PG 13 up in here everything was strictly PG buddy, buddy like." She narrows her eyes at him not sure whether or not to trust him,

            "Fine." She finally says giving up she throws her keys down and pulls off her jacket, "Take Carson into my room, you can head home. I'll sleep on the couch." 

               Carson stretches in bed, wondering where she was then last night comes back to her she sits up in the bed wondering where Phillip is. Examining the messy room she looks horrified, "How does Sel find anything in here..." her eyes stop on the pillow beside her on a note, "Selene kicked me out this morning, if you need me call. 867-5309. Have a good day, Phil" a smile lingers on her face as her heart flutters slightly, maybe he isn't so bad.

                "Jane, here are the files you asked for." Carson smiles handing over the files to the lady at the front counter of the waiting room, she glances into the room just to get an idea of how busy they will be when she notices a blonde hair women seated. "What is she doing here?" she asks dunking down behind Jane,

                "Who?" she asks a little panicky scanning the crowd for someone shocking, Carson peaks back over her shoulder just to make sure it was really her.

                "Risa's mom, right there in the green shirt." She dunks back down, how do you deal with a grieving mother?

                "Uh, I don't know...This is the time Risa would normally be in," she suggests and Carson rolls her eyes, of course she knew that she would rush out into the waiting room to scoop Risa in her arms right about now. "Maybe you should go talk to her?"

                "And say what? Your daughter died, why are you here?" Carson asks sinking lower to the ground this was an impossible situation,

                "Of course not, but at least see what she is doing here. She never came up to sign in or anything so I don't know what to tell you." They have a little stare down at each other, why did Carson have to be the one to do it?

                "I have a patient if she is still here in fifteen minutes come get me," Carson breaths before creeping away avoiding the opening in the window to get back to her patient. Fifteen minutes had come and gone, Jane never came and got her but something told her Jenny was still here, she could just feel it.

            Walking into the waiting room her suspicion had been right, the lady sat in the corner of the room Risa's pink jacket placed on her lap like so many times before that Carson can remember. The only difference now was that Risa wasn't here, and the mom was obviously still distraught about that. "Jenny, is that you?" She asks hoping it would be enough for her to give the reason for being there without Carson having to ask,

                "Nurse Nash, I was wondering if I would see you..." she gives a weak smile up at her before turning back to her daughters coat hugging it close.

                Sitting down in the seat beside her she places her hand gently on Jenny's shoulder, "Can I help you with something?"

                "No..." she sighs, they sit in silence as Carson tries to figure out the least painful way to ask why she had returned. "For nearly three years I've come here at this time on this day," she speaks up again not looking away from the coat. "I tried, I tried so hard not to come today but I couldn't help it. I feel closest to her when I'm here, which is pathetic but oddly enough she was at her happiest here." She stops to let out a mixture of a sob and a slight laugh, "Especially when she met you." Her smile quivers and Carson realizes tears are starting to form in her eyes.

                "I was at my happiest too; I've never met anyone as incredible as Risa." Carson manages choking down tears,

                "You know why I named her Risa?" She asks almost in a daze she continues, "It means Laughter and the moment she opened her eyes and looked into mine she giggled and I just knew Risa was perfect." They talked a little longer, Jenny told stories of Risa and how much she missed her little girl when the clock struck the time she would always leave she got up thanked Carson for her time and left.

                "I didn't think you would call," Phil says as he walks across the hospital cafeteria to the table Carson was drinking coffee.

                "I wasn't," she says honest twirling the red straw in her drink not even bothering to look up at him, "But Risa's mom showed up today in a daze, and well..." she looks up for a minute his beard freshly shaved, her heart skips a beat and she looks back at the coffee feeling flushed. "I felt like I needed you."

                "Well. I feel a little dirty and used right now." He taunts folding his arms across his chest leaning back in the chair, she holds back a smile amused at his attitude.

                "And this is why I needed you." She glances back up at him and he smirks,

                "Because I'm dirty?" he asks his voice sounding as though he was offended, she lets out a small laugh.

                "No, because you make me laugh and feel comfortable with the world," she looks away shyly feeling as though it was a stupid thing to say surely he thought she was an idiot now. He stares at her placing his arms on the table resting his head on top of them staring up into her eyes, he couldn't put into words how she made him feel until she said that.

                "Why do you do that?"

                She looks over at him seeing him look up at her so adorable like, "What?" she asks brushing the hair behind her ear, looking back down at her coffee.

                "Look away after you say something to me, I rather enjoy your eyes on me you know." He says in the most smooth voice he can, hoping to win her over just slightly. Her eyes land back on his as she wonders if he was flirting with her or just being nice.

                "I don't know, just most the time I say something it's stupid so looking away is the closest I can come to disappearing..." she sighs pulling her hair out from her ear letting it fall back in her face, suddenly feeling very insecure around him.

                He frowns, brushing her hair back behind her ear with his hand he takes her hand with his other hand holding it so she would stop hiding her face from him. "I have yet to hear you say a stupid thing Carson, you are brilliant. Why would you ever think otherwise? And don't hide from me, I love nothing more than to look at you."

                She stares at him intensely, "When I say something back home, I usually get glared at afterwards so I mustn't be that brilliant." She says purposely ignoring the part about him liking to look at her.    

                "By Michael?" he asks looking at her with concern but his inside beaming with joy, Mr. Perfect isn't so perfect it appears. Carson turns away feeling as though this was pointless, Phil wanted one thing and that  was to find any reason to hate Michael and she knew it. "Cars, I want to be your friend. Don't worry about my friendly comments honest, you aren't my type." He says bluntly.

                "Glad to hear that." She grins like it didn't bother her and though she wasn't single and technically he wasn't her type, the words still stung. Bad. He gives a light chuckle letting go of her hand to lean back in his chair, everything was going as planned, nothing makes a girl want a guy more than when she thinks he doesn't want her.