Part 1

Deans POV

"Nothin's like doing time to build better character." AJ sighed from the adjacent cell as she drew a tally mark.

"Where did you even get a piece of chalk?" Stephanie asked her.

AJ pointed to the snoring lady in the corner of their cell, "It was under her butt."

"Gross..." she commented quietly before signing and sitting down, "This floor is so dirty."

"Get over it princess." Punk said from the floor of our cell, "We did the crime, we gotta do the time. What are you in here for, huh? Spraying perfume or something?"

"Punk, were all here for the same reason." Hunter said while shaking his head, "Stop acting like your a prison veteran."

"Well I've got nothin better to do." Punk said with a sigh, "Those scared straight shows have it all wrong. Jail is boring."

"That's because we're still in the station." I told him with a groan before leaving my head against the bars, "This ridiculously boring station."

Dean Ambrose was feeling very fucked up right now ladies and gentlemen.

My chest felt like it had a small blazing fire inside of it because of all the hits I took, and my ribs weren't feeling too hot either, no doubt there bruised.

But I wasn't worried about my physical injuries at the moment.

My mind was set on finding Bray, but I had no idea where he would be, nor could I get to him if I could because I'm rotting in a cell at this very moment.

I glanced around and sighed at what I saw.

Punk was drumming his fingers on his knee cap while Hunter paced the cell, mumbling something about how his parents were going to kill him.

Randy was in one corner of the cell with his head leaned against the wall and eyes glued shut, while Roman sat on the other side of the cell, Seth fast asleep next to him while he talked in a hushed tone to Naomi who was in the cell directly next to us.

In the other cell, Steph quietly sat on the floor while AJ was making drawings in the dust on the floor.

Paige had her head leaned on Naomi while she continued to talk to Roman, and Nikki sat on the bench, eyes closed and appeared to be in a light sleep.

I sighed again, I haven't had a chance to talk to her lately and that bothered me, especially with the conversation we need to have about this entire baby situation.

"Can we play some music?" Punk groaned.

"They took my phone." I say with a shrug, "So I guess not."

"They didn't take mine." He said to me while taking it out of his pocket, "but I don't have any data to get on Spotify. Hunter let me use your hot spot."

"Wait you have a hot spot?" Roman immediately asked.

"I don't have my phone Punk." Hunter told, "And yeah, I can turn my phone into a hot spot."

"Why are you now just telling me this?" Roman asked, "Do you know how many times I've been in wifi-less places with you and you never told me you have a source?"

I rolled my eyes at their conversation and crossed my arms as I watched the two bicker for a few minutes.

"I just wanna listen to music." Punk mumbled while opening his phone, "No music, no happiness."

"Hey." We heard a voice say and I turn my head to see a blond officer walk our direction, "You're not suppose to have your phone."

"What phone?" Punk said with a sheepish laugh while hiding it behind his back.

She gave him a knowing look, "Hand it here young man."

Punk sighed before standing up and placing the phone in her palm.

"You can get this later." She said while giving him a small smile, "You won't be here forever."

"How do you know?" I asked her.

"They usually let high school students off with a warning." She told us, "You may have to do some community service, but no real crime seemed to be done while you were in the school, well so I've heard. Nothing was broken or damaged."

"We didn't go in there to break or damage anything." I mumbled and she looked at me.

"Then what were  you in there for?" She asked and Hunter exchanged glances with me.

"Um... we were just-" I started to say but Roman cut off.

"Hey..." he mumbled, "Are you officer McCool?"

She looked over at him, "I am. Why?"

"Do you remember me?" Roman asked her, "We met last night at Treasure Hill?"

"You know her?" Naomi asked him and he nodded.

"You got in trouble with the law?" AJ asked, "ooo, in telling Dean."

"He didn't get in trouble." She said, "I remember you, now. Roman, wasn't it?"

"Yes ma'am." Roman said either standing up.

"Good god," she said while shaking her head, "What are you doing here?"

"Roman you know her?" I asked him as I walked over to him.

"I met her last night." He told me before turning to her, "Is there any way you can get us out of here any quicker than this process is going?"

She looked at all of us for a second before sighing and walking off.

"Wait-" Roman tried saying but I cut him off as I turned him towards me.

"All of a sudden you just know random officers?" I asked him.

"She's not random." He told me, "I went to Treasure Path last night alright? I just needed to get away for a while, Dean. I'm fine, God, just drop it."

"The point is you aren't telling me thing." I say to him.

"Well I'm sorry." He said and tried to turn away from me but I stopped him.

"I'm serious." I say to him, "You do this every time you aren't at your best. You shut everyone out and I need you to cut that out."

"You do the same thing," he said while crossing his arms.

"Don't be like me!" I shouted and he flinched at my sudden tone, "You think I want you to act like me or something Roman? Don't you ever fucking assume that. You think I want you to be a worthless piece of shit like I am? No! Your so much freaking better than that, so stop fucking doing the things I do, and start talking to me like I know my normal Roman does."

He remained quiet for a moment and I could feel everyone else staring at the two of us, but my eyes don't leave him.

"You're not worthless." He mumbled before turning away from me and staring out of the cell.

I took a long sigh before opening my mouth to speak to him again, but another voice cut me off.

"You better be glad I'm on my shift." I heard the officer mumbled as she stuck a key into the girls cell and twisted, "Come on out-"

"Freedom!" AJ shouted while running out of the cell and wrapping the woman into a tight embrace, "You just became my favorite bean."

"AJ declaw yourself." Stephanie said with a sigh as the rest of the girls exited the cell, "Sorry about her."

"It's alright." She said with a small laugh before coming over and unlocking our cell then looked at me and Roman, "You wanna explain to me why your here though?"

Roman looked at me for a moment and I sighed, "Listen Miss..."

"Just call me Michelle." She told me as we exited the cell.

"Well this listen Miss Michelle," I told her, "I would tell you, but this situation pretty much needs to be kept in the dark as much as it can be."

"That's not cutting it." She said while swinging the key around her finger, "Either you tell me what's going on, or you can go back in there."

"Tell her Dean!" Punk shouted, "I can't go back in the slammer."

"Hush Punk." Seth said to him while rubbing his eyes and yawning

I rolled my eyes at his comment then looked at her and sighed.

"Look, I'm serious." I say to her in a quiet time, "I can't just tell you, alright? To keep you safe as well as myself right."

She stared at me for a moment before sighing, "Don't get yourself into any trouble, you hear me? I don't wanna see you back here."

"What are they gonna say when they see that we left?" Randy asked.

"I'll tell them I handled it." She told him, "Don't worry about it."

"Thank you." Roman said to her.

"You're welcome." She said to him, "Just... don't come back here... in trouble that is."

"We won't." I say to her, "Promise."

I couldn't help but to look at her for a moment before walking off.

That was the first time I saw that woman, and I could tell it wouldn't be the last.

%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^

"You gonna pick up this time?" I asked Nikki as I watched her phone light up on my nightstand again.

"No." she said as she pulled my blanket over her head.

"You're gonna have to talk to her at some point Nikki." I say with a sigh.

"No I don't Dean." She mumbled again.

I sighed once again as I sat up.

It was Sunday afternoon, but Nikki and I was lazily hanging out in my room while Seth and Roman watched TV in the living room.

It was honestly awkward as hell because we didn't do much talking, and her phone kept ringing repeatedly. Brie being the one to make the call each time.

Nikki refused to talk or answer any texts from her. She didn't even want to say her name. I knew she was mad at Brie, but I didn't know to what extent she would be.

"She's your sister Nik." I say to her.

"A sister that hurt not only me, but you," she said to me, "And not only us, but our friends, our friends who are like family, repeatedly. Your brothers, Na and Paige who are practically my sisters. And are more of real sisters than Brie will ever be to me again. I don't care any more Dean, I don't claim her as family or anything else."

"You don't mean that." I say to her.

"I do." She mumbled, "You just don't get it Dean."

"Well then explain it to me." I told her and pulled her closer to me, "I don't like it when your upset. Get it off your chest, just talk to me."

She stayed quiet for a moment before resting her head on my chest, "You know how you feel when Roman doesn't tell you stuff. And you only want him to because you love him and want to help him?"

I nodded and she continued, "Or you know how you and Seth clash and he's being a butthole. But you don't want to say it do anything to hurt him too badly because you love him so much and you only want to see the better of him?"

"It's a similar feeling towards this." She said to me, "For so long, I didn't care how much we were polar opposites. I didn't care how much she annoyed me. I didn't even care how much she hurt you, or Steph, or Roman, or Randy, or anyone, I still wanted to see her succeed. I wanted to see her happy, because that's my sister, that's my twin sister. And your suppose to wish the better of your siblings. Even when she doesn't do it back."

I saw her shut her eyes tightly and clench her fists as she took a shaky inhale.

"And I just feel like there only so much I can give back when she's hurt me so many times." She told me, "It gets hard Dean. That's my twin, and people are right when they say twins have a special connection. And all I wanna do is be there for her, but she pushes me away and treats me like this? Do you know how hard it is to see that someone needs your help but they won't admit it or won't let them help? And you wanna go off sayings such as 'if they don't want your help, don't give it to them' but that's your family. That's someone your suppose to go to when you can't trust anyone else, but instead they're the one that want to hurt you the most. Do you know what it's like to be betrayed by your family Dean. That hurts, that breaks people and sadly, that's life for so many. Including myself."

"People will look at the money we have," she said as she wiped one of her eyes, "Or the cars we drive or the house we live in and think 'everything must be fine for them' and they couldn't be more wrong. Because money can't fix the relationship I have with my sister. Money can't make my parents care about us. Money can't fix the problems I have because if it did, maybe I would be living the perfect life."

I watched her nervous habits as she continued to rant. The steady picking at the palm of her hand with her nail. The way she shifted when she touched a subject, then backed out of it before explaining. The way her eyes would water ever time she mentioned Brie and how she would blink to make them disappear. One falling ever now and then.

I realize she spoke the truth on some things.

When you looked at Nikki and her family, you would think it would be perfection compared to the way I live with my own brother.

But when you sat down and really talked to her, when she expressed herself to the point of tears, even with what all she has.. I don't know, it makes me upset to know she feels this way, but it also makes me grateful.

I don't have money. Roman and I both work, and every penny I have after paying bills, I spend on Benny and Sarah because I adore them, and any left over money Roman has normally goes into a saving he has for Seth for when we graduate, which Seth doesn't even know about yet.

But with all the money we lack, we still have a bond that's worth more than even the most priceless of things... something Nikki couldn't say she really had.

"Have you ever thought to sit down and talk to your family about how you felt?" I asked her once she had stopped talking for a moment.

She stayed silent for a moment before shaking her head, "It wouldn't end well."

I nodded, not wanting to press any suggestions to far.

"Everything's gonna be ok Nikki, I promise." I say to her, "...your eventually gonna have to talk to Brie though. I know she hurt you, us, but it's not good to have a grudge against someone your entire life, I would know."

"How do you know?" She asked me quietly.

"Well my father did once roam this planet." I said with a small laugh, but she remained silent. Probably unsure of how to react.

Nobody ever mentioned my dad. Not as a joke, not to get information out of me, not because they wanted to blackmail me. He was a subject people didn't touch, and was happy for that.

"You know," I say to her, "The day after my dad died, Ro brung Sarah and Benny over. And you know how Sarah is. Always speaking her mind, but somehow it ends up being the truth."

"Well," I said while grabbing her hand, "She told me something. She told me why it hurt so bad. Cause my fathers death actually hurt me Nikki. Like a lot. And it's weird that it did because he treated me like shit. Abused daily, physical and verbal, and I'm not sure which one hurt worst. All that 'stick and stone may break my bone but words will never hurt me' is bullshit. Words hurt. A lot. His words hurt a whole lot more because that was my father. A man who took part in creating me."

"I always though that if my father was dead, the world would be a better place," I told her, "But I actually cried when I got that news. Strange, correct?"

"Why?" She asked me quietly.

"Well Sarah said it was because I never forgave him." I told her.

She looked up at me, "Why would you need to forgive him? He didn't do anything to be forgiven."

"Forgiveness and a direct path to moving forward." I told her, "And I didn't even think of it like that until she told me."

"When you have a grudge against somebody, you hold onto that's without realizing." I told her, "And you'll take that grudge and apply it to people who actually want to be good to you"

"Like if someone cheats on you and you hold that to the next person you get into a relationship with." She mumbled and I nodded, "I guess it makes sense.."

"You say your never gonna forgive Brie." I say to her, "But I need you to, for your own sake. For the sake of when we adopt Benny and Sarah in the future, I don't want them thinking it's ok to just stay mad at everyone all the time."

"You sound like a father." She said with a small laugh and I smiled before kissing her forehead.

"Someday soon." I say to her, "Someday soon."

We both remained silent for a long while. Simply thinking, though I'm sure her mind was miles from here.

"Hey Nikki?" I say as I glanced down and saw that her eyes were closed and her chest was steadily rising and falling, "Nik?"

When she doesn't answer the second time, I gently move from beneath her and lie her on my pillow, then gently exit the bed and kiss her forehead before quietly exiting my room.

"You need to talk to him." I heard Seth's voice say and I sighed as I approached the living room.

"I need to fix things in my own relationship before I start blurting out feelings that I only said out of anger and because I haven't had a real conversation with Naomi yet." I heard Roman respond.

"He's worried about you Roman." Seth told him.

"Oh my God." I hear Roman groan, "Well tell him to stop. I'm fine. I can handle myself. It's my job to worry about him, not the other way around."

"That is so fucking stupid." I heard Seth say.

"No it's not." Roman responded as I entered the living room.

"It is." I told him as both of their eyes shoot to me, "Save the explanations. I need the keys, I'm going out."

"Out where?" Roman asked, "The suns starting to set."

I scoffed as I looked around and grabbed the keys off of the table, "Maybe when you start telling me how you feel, I'll start telling you where I'm going."

"That's not funny." He told me with a glare.

"It was never meant to be." I told him, but I my eyes glanced over to Seth who was pinching the bridge of his noes.

I felt a small pang of guilt as I realized what the two of us arguing was putting him through, and I sighed.

"I'll be back by 10." I told them as I walked towards the door, "Tell Nikki I said good night if she's still here."

"Be safe." I heard Seth mumble before exiting the house and walking out to the truck.

I waisted no time climbing to the truck and starting it up, blasting the heat, then backing out.

I sighed as I traveled down the empty road, then made a left onto the highway at the intersection.

I needed some time with myself. Maybe then I can finally get a better hold on my life.

As I traveled for a while, I turned onto a dirt road that I had been down weeks earlier, except at that time, everything was well.

I remember riding in the back of Randy's truck with Nikki by my side, my closet friends surrounding me and life was alright. Now I traveled alone, heart heavy and mind full of stress.

I rode up the hill and parked a little ways from the top, then got out and walked up the hill and towards the large tree.

I looked up at the sky as I sat beneath the tree. The sun was a mysterious dark blue with a hint of orange glow from the mostly setter sun.

I leaned my head against the tree and closed my eyes.

"Dean your gonna break your neck!"I heard a voice shout and I glanced to see Stephanie with her hands firmly on her hips, "Hunter get him down!"

"Stephanie your not his mom." Hunter said while climbing a few branches.

"Yeah," Roman commented as he HIM upside down next to me, "If Dean wants to break his neck, then let him."

"I hope you break your neck." Naomi said while rolling her eyes from the branch above us.

"I hope you fall and break your leg." Roman shot at her. 

"Pretty sure breaking your leg isn't as bad as breaking your neck dumbass." She shot back at him, "So your comeback was invalid."

"About as invalid as your face." Roman shot back.

"That didn't make any sense." She told him.

"Just like your face." Roman said again and she dramatically rolled her eyes.

"You sure are Naomi's face a lot Ro," I say to him, "Do you like it or something?"

"Don't start Ambrose." Roman growled.

"You probably wanna kiss it!" I teased and immediately regretted it when he gave me a hard shove and I found myself landing on the ground, though it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. 

"Ouch..." I heard Seth's voice mumble beneath me.

"Roman look what you made me do!" I told him as I rose up and helped Seth to stand, "I crushed Seth!" 

"Excellent way of putting it." Paige said with a laugh and Seth blushed hard.

"Is he alright?" Nikki asked as she inspected him as though she was his mother, "Are you hurt Seth?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine." He reassured, "Dean's just heavy that's all."

"I feel offended." I say to him I say with a laugh and the other found themselves joining in as I looked up at the sunsetting sky.

"Ambrose?" I heard a voice say and my eyes immediately snapped open. I glanced around for a moment before my eyes landed on a figure.

"Randy?" I asked as I stood, "What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question." He said to me.

"Too bad I asked first." I say to him.

He sighed, "I'm just up here to think."

I shrugged, "I guess I can relate."

He nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets, "How's Nikki?"

"Alright." I say to him, "How's yourself? I know things have been-"

"Hellish?" He suggested, "Yeah. But I'm fine. I'll be fine."

I nodded and we both stayed quiet for a minute.

"Um..." he said, "Hows Roman?"

"He's uh," I think for a moment, "Alright I guess. We haven't really talked lately."

He stayed quiet for a moment before responding, "I'm sorry... for what I've done. It's just all confusing and... I don't know."

"It's not me you should be saying sorry to Randy." I tell him, "That's Roman."

"I can't tell Roman sorry." He said to me, "Hell I won't be able to look at him..."

"I just feel bad for..." he started then stopped and I stared at him for a bit. Something was wrong with him.

"Are you sure you're Randy?" I asked him.

"Yeah it's just..." he trailed again, "Just uh..."

"Eva?" I suggest and he stayed quiet for a moment.

"Yeah..." he said with a nod, but didn't look me in the eyes when he said so.

I sighed, "Things are gonna get better Randy. I know you're heartbroken-"

"No I'm fine." He quickly changed and I looked at him again, noticing that he kept shifting on his feet as though he was nervous.

"Randy tell me what's wrong." I tell him.

"It's just I... regret..." he started.

"Regret what?" I asked him.

"A lot." He stated, "But I just.... I just need to be alone right now Dean... to think. I think I'm gonna go."

"No." I tell him while taking out my phone and checking the time, "You can stay here, I need to get home anyways."

He stayed quiet for a moment and I placed a hand on his shoulder. 

"Just relax Randy." I tell him, "Everything's gonna be alright, ok? Have a good night."

I turned and began to walk before hear his voice.

"No it's not." I hear him say.

"Randy-" I start to say, but then stop in my tracks when I hear a click, fear immediately washing over me.

"Remember how I said I regretted a lot?" I heard him ask, his voice sounding completely broken, but that didn't change the fact that I knew he held an item in his hand that could possibly end my life, "I'm sorry Dean. I'm so sorry Dean. You've been through to fucking much, and you were so close to breaking free... but your life ends here." 

^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Chapter 43 of book 3
Chapter 108 in all

I'm sorry for not being up to standard as a writer, friend or human being lately. Life happens.

I'm just kinda tired and all
Sorta just wanna stop trying for a few days and not care, give up.
But life moves on right?

Some of y'all predicted something of the sorts and I say y'all comment it, I was like "SSHHHHHH" but I didn't say anything.

But y'all still don't know what I have planned, so haha.

It said part one cause next chapter will be part 2 in Dean's POV.

Okkkaaaay so, Book 3 is coming to a closer more sooner than later. Book three gets a bit more... intense... as this chapter shows a bit... but the beginning of book four should be filled with some good times... maybe 😶

I mean it must be right? Cause they're on the road to graduation day.

That's right, that means this book is closer to being done more now then ever.

Sad face. ☹️

andddddd I don't know if I'm doing any type of sequel after this or not.

I mean I graduate in like a in 2018 and then I have college and I don't wanna start anything and not be able to find time to finish it.

so we'll just have to see

Moving on.

QOTD #1: favorite Christmas song?

QOTD #2: favorite author?

QOTD #3: rain or sunshine?

QOTD #4: favorite cruiserweight?

QOTD #5: who do you want to see as champions in 2017

Y'all should know that I love y'all by now.

Blessed day.

Bubye 💝