1. Where do you think my addiction for Youtube, late-night reading and everything else that involves a three bar connection came from?

2. I can't officially download food yet, so - internet - up your freaking game.

3. No matter how many times I repeat it, I can't get google chrome to accept the goddamn cookies.

4. Because the internet sucks us all into a vortex of addictive gifs and unbelievable eBay offers that somehow seem too good not to take into the toilet with us. All. The. Freaking. Time.

5. Cat memes. Enough said.

6. Because thanks to the creative depths of the online world, I now know exactly what Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump's love-child will look like....And what can I say, there are just some things that I'll never be able to un-see.

7. I have absolutely no desire to know what the fox says..

8. In the time that it takes safari to open, I can probably run all the way to Antarctica, take a selfie with a polar bear and come back on a hot air balloon. Oops, that will probably melt the ice-caps....My bad.

9. Click-bait is officially going to be the bane of my existence. "WHAT?! Unicorns exist??" *clicks on a random sidebar about 23 times per second*

10. To every site that insists that I've simultaneously won an i-Phone, an i-Pod and a shopping spree - *picks up microphone and starts singing 'bed of lies' by Nicki Minaj*

11. Pop-up buttons that are all like: "wanna complete this survey" and then they're like: "Lol, too bad - you have to anyway." It should be illegal to make someone answer a 20 questions questionnaire about car deals when they just want to see who Zayn Malik's latest girlfriend is....Jeez. Talk about injustice.

12. Ads on the side-bar are like little three year old kids with their cute piggy tails and puppy-dog eyes asking for some candy. NO. I will not give in to - *clicks on the $15 Dotti dress*

13. Speaking of which, non-skippable 30 second ads before youtube clips are almost as bad as having to listen to Donald Trump's campaign.

14. Because thanks to every selfie online, I can see exactly what everyone's bathroom looks like.

15. I'm subscribed to way much stuff on the internet to ever be a normal human being.