i keep telling myself

that the way i hold on to symbolism

is what is destroying me from the inside

but tell me why i see you

in the hands of a girl 

coming up the stairwell

she opens up the door

and i notice the stuffed octopus

sitting in her arms

it shouldn't mean much

but it reminds me of the one

you gave the girl who came after me

and how she wears it like a crown

i realize its just another symbol

of how i find symbols in everything

if it's habit of religion 

or sign of madness

i should not know

but it leaves me bitter

all the same