A/N: I know it's been a while. Explanation for that in the long-ass author's note at the end of the chapter. To anyone who doesn't want to read that: Thanks for your patience.

"And you're sure you're okay? Your head doesn't hurt? Or your—"

"Flo." Phoenix's smirk was infuriatingly heartwarming, especially when he framed my face with his hands and pulled me closer to him. The scent of gasoline and rubber in the pit lane, mixed with the sight of Phoenix in his race suit, calmed me more than I'd liked to admit. He didn't say a word; just looked deep into my eyes, the forest green in them as always soothing my soul.

"I'm just worried," I whispered loud enough to be heard above the chatter of a few dozen employees and whirring wheel guns.

Phoenix responded with a kiss on my nose, the smirk on his lips somehow even cockier than before. "What does this tell you, Lucia?" he circled his hand around his face, making me look at him properly.

His dark hair stuck to his forehead from the Abu Dhabi heat, and I couldn't suppress the urge to brush it back, allowing me a better look at the handsome race driver in front of me. Phoenix looked dangerously handsome — as he always did in a racing suit — and his eyes sparkled with euphoria that told me he knew exactly what he did to me. His thick, dark lashes fluttered when he raised a brow, waiting for me to respond. It was hard to say anything when he looked at me the way he did now; predatory, dangerous, and way too damn confident.

And then it hit me.

"You have no doubts," I concluded, and Phoenix nodded.

"I don't. There's nothing stopping me from being at my best today. You gave me the perfect car to win this damn championship today, and I promise I'll look out for both myself and our baby here." He patted the halo of his car, and I couldn't help but watch the movement, eyeing the machine I helped create. This thing was a beast, ready to maul everyone in its wake.

The power these cars held had always been fascinating to me, but at this moment, it was more terrifying than anything else. I knew I had to get my act together, though. The race was starting in just a few minutes, and Phoenix didn't need me freaking out right in front of him.

Taking a deep breath, I focused back on him, watching how he was already closing up his suit. I reached out and lined up the velcro around his neck, giving it a last pat before looking back up at him. He had that pre-race glimmer all around him, excitement and adrenaline practically bursting through his suit.

"I'm proud of you," I said with a kiss on his lips. "And I trust you'll show all of them how it's done. Get those fuckers."

Phoenix chuckled, his eyes scanning my face just as the sound of the five-minute-warning resounded around us.

"I love you," he said, brushing his lips over my own. I held onto him a little longer, letting the taste of him calm my soul until the clearing of a throat pulled us back apart. Idir stood a few feet behind Phoenix, peeking over his shoulder to show me his watch.

Nodding, I turned back to Phoenix. "I love you, too. Go be a world champion."

"That's the plan." Phoenix grinned, taking his gloves and helmet from Idir. The two exchanged a look and Phoenix leaned over, telling his best friend something I couldn't make out.

"Yup. Got it," Idir responded with a grin of his own, patting his Phoenix's back.

Without elaborating further, Phoenix got into his car, shooting me one last wink from inside his helmet before he pushed the visor down.

My father had always said that life stopped the second that visor closed in front of you. From that moment on, it was all about the car, about your instincts, and the race itself. And while it was obvious why drivers felt that way, given that they were on the track during the race, it was also pretty similar to us engineers and mechanics, too.

The second Phoenix's visor went down, we all knew it was show time. No more chatting, no more joking around. Just focus.

So that's what I did: I focused on the screens in front of me, waiting for the lights to turn out so Phoenix could enter the track from the pit lane. His disadvantage would've been demotivating to some, but we all knew these were the conditions Phoenix thrived in. Challenges like those just brought out the best in him.

And as the lights turned out, that became even more obvious. Because Phoenix sped down the asphalt like he was born to do it; with smooth movements and almost rhythmical understanding of the track. He played his very own symphony by hitting every apex, turning every corner the way it was supposed to.

In the first twenty laps, Phoenix worked his way up to tenth position, overtaking the other drivers with skill and precision I didn't think I'd ever seen in him. From then on it got harder, with the drivers in front of him either getting fresh tires or being so far away that he had no chance of getting to them in the near future.

"How do you feel about these tires? It's about time to box." Chris spoke into his headset, and I pushed my headphones closer to my ears to get Phoenix's response.

"I can go longer. Leave me out as long as possible and I'll get the rest of the pack with the better tires in the last laps."

"That's a big risk."

"Yeah, I know, Jojo." Phoenix's voice crackled through the radio. "I'm telling you, I won't be able to get much further if we box now. I need the ammo by the end. It just feels like the best move."

Chris furrowed his brows, but studied the pit wall with great interest until, finally, he sighed. He radioed the strategy department and made a decision a few moments later.

"Alright, Phoenix. You get your way. Overcut it is."

And for the next few laps, it looked like Phoenix made the right call. He was as fast as the rest of the grid, and even overtook two more drivers, all while driving on tires that were 33 laps older than theirs. At the front of the grid Rafael and Connor fought for the win, while Phoenix now finished his fortieth lap with the same tire he'd started out on.

"Getting blisters, guys," Phoenix said, and considering the view we got through the screens, he seemed to be right. Big, black spots formed on his front tires, showing they were close to their end.

"Copy." Chris nodded, clicking a few dozen buttons on the pit wall. "Push for another lap and then box. We'll give you softs."

"Sweet." Phoenix instantly did as he was told; his lap time increased with every turn he took, and in less than two minutes, he was in the box.

The soft compound tires my team fitted him with were the fastest on the track; most other cars were driving on the hard ones, which had less grip and were thus a little slower than the wheels Phoenix was on now.

It gave him an advantage he had to use, now that the time he'd lost in the pit stop put him back to P13. He did as expected, though, and worked his way back up the rankings, until in lap 50 of 58, he was in seventh place. Technically, the title was his if he kept that position.

But Phoenix was nothing if not a race driver. A man with the desire to win, to be faster than all the others on track. And he was — he set fastest lap after fastest lap, and worked his way further up.

Lap 53. Phoenix was in fourth position.

"Take it slow and watch your tires. You need them for four more laps," Chris spoke through the radio, but got no response from Phoenix. He was in racing mode, probably not wanting to be disturbed at all as he now approached his teammate, who was currently in third position.

Felipe's tires were much older than Phoenix's, so I wasn't surprised when he practically let Phoenix through, not even trying to put up a fight — not that he would've risked that in the last race of the season, either. He knew how important this race was to Phoenix and wouldn't jeopardize his success just to keep a position. That's how teammates worked.

"Three more laps, Phoenix. You're on the podium already. Keep your head down." Chris's eyes were glued to the screen, his leg bouncing as hard as Michael's were. The two were so focused on the screens, they probably didn't even realize how hard they were biting their cheeks.

Not that I had a right to say anything — I was a nervous wreck. The only thing keeping me sane was the way Phoenix drove: With confidence and an undeniable talent that made every motor sport lover's heart soar.

He was now right behind Rafi, who struggled to keep his car on the track with his old tires, the blisters on them making me fear they'd burst any second now. Still, he fought as hard as he could when Phoenix showed up in his mirror, to no avail.

By the time the last lap rolled around, Phoenix was past him, and not just that; he used the slip stream — the headwind Rafael's car blocked and thus made Phoenix a lot faster — to get closer to Connor, who was less than a second ahead of him now.

The entire team huddled around the TV in the garage, and the men sitting next to me on the pit wall had already gotten up, all five of them biting their nails.

"Komm schon!" Michael yelled at the screen, watching how Phoenix went on the outside of Connor, but couldn't keep his car in front. He had two more corners to do the necessary overtake.

"Not yet, Phoenix. Not yet," I muttered, watching how Phoenix opened his rear wing, giving him a speed advantage. To my relief, he didn't overtake just yet. Instead, he put himself in perfect position to get Connor in the last turn, speeding past him right as the last straight appeared in his sight.

The whole garage erupted in cheers, and my mechanics made their way to the fence at the start-and-finish line, waiting for their hero to make it down the track. And then there he was: Phoenix raced past the checkered flag half a car length ahead of Connor.

At that moment, the world stood still. I could feel multiple pairs of arms around me, could hear people cheering and calling out my name. It didn't matter, though, because all I could look at were the screens all around us, all of them showing Phoenix when he slowed down, his head shaking as he threw his hands on his face. Soon after, Connor and Rafi followed him, the three of them now driving down the track side-by-side.

It was an unreal picture; Three different drivers from three different teams with the most curious connection. Most fans that were now cheering for the three of them didn't even know it wasn't driving that'd pushed them closer together. It was life itself.

"Phoenix." Chris's voice made me look back at him, the sudden realization we hadn't had a radio yet making me stare at the screen. "Guess you gotta stop calling me Jojo now, mate. You're the fucking world champion!"

His response took a while, but when Phoenix's voice crackled through the radio, it was laced with so much emotion that I couldn't help but swallow, too. "Holy shit, Chris. Fuck. That was insane. I don't even..." Phoenix's voice broke, and it took him another second before he spoke again, his voice now thick with tears. "I don't even know what to say. Thank you. Thank you all."

"I told you we would win this, Phoenix!" Michael yelled into the radio, making all three of us laugh. "You are the man! Champion of the world!" he exclaimed, and threw his arms around my shoulders. I was still trying to catch up with reality, my sight getting blurry from tears. It didn't help that Michael was now crying as well, frantically wiped his hands over his face.

"Congratulations, Michael." It was all I knew to say, all I knew was necessary.

"Flo!" Idir's voice somehow stood out above the rest of the noise, his strong arms engulfing me in a tight hug. "We did it!"

I nodded, not really knowing what to say. Tears were already streaming down my face, the tension of the past months leaving a glorified emotional mess in its wake.

"Come on." Idir took my hand and pulled me away from Chris and Michael, who followed us down the pit lane and toward parc ferme, where Connor, Rafi, and Phoenix were now pulling up.

My mechanics built a path for me as soon as they spotted me, neither of them even giving me a chance to stay in the background. They pushed me to the front of the crowd and then roped their arms around mine, making sure I stayed in place. At one point, Jin showed up next to me, a wide grin plastered on his face as he hugged me tightly.

And I was damn glad these people were holding me upright, because when Phoenix stopped his car right in front of us, it sure felt like I was about to faint from the mere sight of him.

Reality started to settle as I watched him turn off the car, take off the steering wheel, and then just sit there for a long moment. A few seconds later, he got out, positioned himself between our team and the car, and bowed down in both our directions.

My team erupted in cheers, and I couldn't stop crying from the appreciation Phoenix showed with such a small gesture. He wasn't just thanking the speed of the car, or the team principal, or himself. He was thanking each and every one of us.

It was a team effort, after all. Effort that'd forced my employees to stay away from their families and friends, that'd meant week after week on the road, all to achieve that one damn goal.

And it was right then and there that reality came crashing down on me.

He really did it.

Phoenix McCoy was world champion.

As I parked the car in parc ferme, I didn't really think about anything. The sound of my roaring engine was replaced with the pounding of my heart, and it took me a quick second to make sense of what exactly had just happened.

Had I just won the championship?

I opened my eyes after a few seconds, letting my hands wander around the steering wheel. For a moment, it felt like I was in some sort of alternate dimension, my entire body numb and tingly, only my gloved fingers around this machinery making sense to me. This damn thing let me achieve my dreams.

This was really happening.

But when I took off the steering wheel, my eyes met the one thing that would get me back to reality even in a day that was made for anything but.

Florence.

She was surrounded by dozens of our team, by all those people who'd worked so damn hard to get me to where I was at that moment. It was heartwarming, really, and so I did the only thing I could.

I got out of the car and bowed down to both of them. People should understand just how much of a team effort this sport was. The passion these people worked with truly humbled me.

"Phoenix!" The familiar voice made me look up, and I instantly spotted Jin, who was right next to Florence. He nodded me over, just in time for the other guys to push Flo closer to the barricade. I met them halfway, practically leaping over at them. Florence was shaking her head, obviously disapproving of whatever plan we had in store for her — to no avail. I respected the hell out of this woman, but this was her time to shine, too.

And so I hoisted her out of the crowd of mechanics, not even listening to her complaints as she held onto my shoulders and looked down at me. Her blue-green eyes sparkled with so much emotion that I could feel every ounce of it; joy, pride, the unshaken belief that this was going to happen, and most of all, I could feel all that love she'd shown to me, the team, and this damn car.

It was miraculous, and all my efforts of coming to this point in my life seemed so worth it if they'd led me here, now, with her in my arms.

"You did it, Phoenix," she said, and pushed my visor open. She sparkled even more in real life lighting, her entire being practically glowing with elation.

"You did," I retorted, earning myself one of the brightest smiles I'd ever seen on her face.

And before I could even think of taking off my helmet and kissing her properly, the two of us were pushed to the side, now forced to follow the after-race protocol. Flo waited patiently as I got weighed and got a microphone shoved in my way, letting me answer all those questions I had no desire to respond to, anyway.

I was in a trance, telling everyone about the team's effort and how we deserved that celebration. A celebration that soon went on its way, with Rafi, Connor, and I pushed toward the driver's room behind the podium.

"Congratulations, man," Rafi said, giving me a swift side-hug.

I couldn't help but grin as he was called out to take his place on the pedestal with a bold 3 written on it, while Connor caught me by surprise and wrapped his slender arms around me. It took me a second to reciprocate the hug — not because I didn't want to, but because I still felt in white-noise-mode, like everything happening around me wasn't even real.

It was too miraculous to be true.

"Congrats, brother," he whispered right in time for his name to be called out. "You deserve it."

I nodded, not knowing what else to say. My heart was still trying to keep up with all the emotions of the moment, and the sudden warmth I felt for my half-brother only piled onto that.

Connor went outside, greeting everyone with a wave and the poster-boy smile he had down to perfection.

"No! I'm not going up there!" the voice called out from behind me, and I turned around with a grin.

There she was. Florence was being pushed by Jin, Michael, and Chris, who simply shoved her further into the room.

"Florence, stop whining. You know we always choose one of the team members for the podium ceremony. Today it's you."

"Michael, we agreed I wouldn't have to—"

"For the love of God, Flo," Jin interjected, practically pushing her into my arms. "Get your boyfriend and get out of there. He's been called already."

Wait, I have?

"Phoenix McCoy!" The announcement echoed again, and this time Flo seemed to have heard it as well.

Her gaze met mine, the plea in it obvious as ever. Don't make me do this, it said.

I didn't care.

Instead, I took her hand in mine, just as the announcer spoke again. "Where is our world champion?"

I glanced out at the podium, and then back at Flo. "You either go out there willingly, or I'll carry you up there. Your choice."

Her eyes widened. "You won't—"

"Three."

"Phoenix, you can't—"

"Two."

"Please don't—"

"One." I hoisted her onto my shoulder and carried her out toward the podium, where Connor and Rafi shook their heads, laughing. A few hundred employees from all teams stood at the ground a few feet below the podium, all of them cheering us on as well.

"I hate you," Flo muttered as I lowered her down on the pedestal.

"No, you don't." I grinned and made my way over to my place, watching Flo as she stood there, blushing like crazy and shooting daggers at me.

Well, they weren't daggers, really. More like pointed darts laced with all the love she'd always shown to me.

We all sat through the team's national anthem, then the Irish one, then got our trophies — Flo only begrudgingly so, even though the proud smile on her face was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen —, and then it was time.

It was time to claim my win.

The second Rafi and Connor started spraying champagne, I rushed over to Florence, pulled her into my arms, and kissed her. Bubbly wine poured down our bodies as she held onto me, as she melted into my touch. My heart was pounding into my ears as the adrenaline rushed through every inch of my body, with people cheering in the background and calling our names.

It was the most surreal moment of my existence, and as I pulled back to look at the love of my life, I just knew I'd remember it for the rest of my time on this planet.

This was it.

Somehow, I'd done it.

Somehow, I'd gotten the girl, gotten the car, gotten the championship... Who the fuck knew how the hell that happened?

"I love you," I said, kissing her again just as Rafi poured another bottle of champagne over us.

Flo wiped her face, leaving her glistening and looking like the damn goddess she was. "I love you," she confirmed, and pressed her lips against mine.

That moment felt like forever, maybe because I wanted it to. It was all the hard work, all the heartbreak and pain, all the unfulfilled wishes and broken promises. But most importantly, it was what'd kept me going from day one.

It was passion, love, and a whole lot of determination.

Only when Rafi and Connor pushed themselves between us did I arrive back in reality, the deprivation of Flo's touch like a taser to my heart. Connor pulled me into another hug before he shoved me further to the fence, pointing down at the crowd. It was the first time I'd realized just how many people were there; our entire team, with Michael, Chris, Jin, Idir, all waving up at us. Idir was bawling his eyes out and got comforted by an emotional Felipe, who grinned at me.

I spotted my mom, along with Flo's parents, further in the back, but even from the distance I could tell all three of them were as overwhelmed as we all were.

It was humbling, seeing just how many people stood behind me and were so touched by the championship trophy in my hands. I wasn't even sure if I deserved all of that commitment, trust, and loyalty.

But just as that thought crept up to me, I was pulled into a four-person-hug with Flo, Connor, and Rafi, the four of us now standing in silence as the celebratory music kept playing in the background. I could practically feel just how proud all three of them were, both for themselves and for me. It was yet another one of those moments I knew I'd strive to relive for the rest of my life.

Because being here with them made me believe that maybe, just maybe, I had deserved it all.

Maybe, just maybe, I'd deserved the best life had to offer.

Maybe it was my time now.

My time to turn this life into just what I wanted it to be.

All with her by my side.

Author's Note

Hey, folks!

First of all: Thank you all for being patient and not stressing me out about new chapters. I know my following has shrunk in the past year anyway, but knowing I can write whenever it's good for me without being pressured or insulted into updating (unfortunately I've witnessed that multiple times with other authors) really means a lot. So thanks for that.

Now, why have I been gone?

It's a lot to explain, but I'll try and keep it short (you know me -- keeping it short is my specialty... not :D) anyway. Those of you who follow me on instagram already know some of it, but here's a little more to it.

So, about two months ago, I left my partner after a 6 year relationship. It wasn't a decision I've made lightly -- it was one that's been in my head for a long while and after multiple coincidences stumbling into my life, I just knew it was the right choice. I still don't regret it, even if I do miss him as a person in my life.

One of the biggest struggles of leaving that relationship was living with the guilt of being the one to break someone's heart. I've never been in that position and never thought I would be, and it just took a lot out of me to process all of that and to make sure I remembered I had a right to be happy and to live life the way I wanted it to. By myself.

Being by myself also meant moving out of the apartment we shared, which was tough. We had to live together for a few weeks before I got my new place, and then it was just a whole rollercoaster of emotion and stress and financial burden to get the new place set up. To top it off, I got covid (thus couldn't work and get paid either) just a day after I moved in, which definitely did not help my mood, since I couldn't leave the house and didn't even have a kitchen set up to cook or bake. I practically lived from microwave mug cakes haha

By now I am mostly set up, but I'm still a little all over the place emotionally. There's a shit ton I have to process now, a new life I have to build for myself and this new reality I need to settle in. It's just a lot.

I knew this chapter would be a hard one to write anyway, just because it's so action-packed and important to the book. But seeing the last scene of the chapter, you guys can imagine why it was so hard to tap into the right emotions and write it the way it deserved to be written. I literally cried for like an hour just writing lmao.

You all know I'd never publish anything I am not content with, but this is a chapter I know I'll never feel good with. It'll always feel like something's missing, like I haven't wired all 250k words this book already has into the one chapter that says it all.

There's a couple more to come, just to wrap everything up. I can't tell you when they'll be there, though. For now I'm just trying to get my life together and write when I feel like I can and when it feels good to me.

Again, thank you all for understanding.

Love you all to bits

Jane

P.S.: really showed you how to keep it short, huh? lol