The setting sun shone through the gap of my guest room curtains, painting the space in a dark orange glow. I opened the window to let some of the refreshing evening air in and leaned on the windowsill, watching the sunflowers dance in the barely existent wind. The sight helped sort my mind, guided me through the chaos that'd ensued tonight.

Jeremiah and Isla had left shortly after Florence did, neither of them saying another word to their son. Being left alone with him had been more than awkward, especially given the circumstances. Yes, we'd known each other from the paddock, but I'd never had a connection to him aside from his relation to the woman I loved. And now that he'd pissed off his entire family and myself, I had an even harder time trying to sympathize with him.

All I'd managed was to help him clear the table in silence before I'd made my way up the stairs.

I'd considered looking for Florence, but had decided against it. I knew where she was and what she was doing and figured she needed the space. If anyone knew what that's like, it's me.

She must've been gutted to hear her brother was behind all of that, conspiring with Connor to invade her father's privacy. I knew how much she valued his opinion and respected his wishes, especially since that accident. This was harder on her than it was on the rest of them, I imagined.

Taking a deep breath, I watched the sun linger on the horizon beneath an empty patch of grass in the backyard, hesitant to leave the day and start the night. Florence had told me her brother and her had been sparring out there a few times, testing their training and settling fights. 

I smiled at the mere thought of her kicking her brother's ass. 

Maybe it was time to get her soon.

"Sebastian's marrying your mother." Rafael's words made me spin around, surprised that I hadn't heard him enter.

He sat on the sofa on the other side of the room, staring straight at me. His eyes were glassy but furious, and the way his hair stood up to all sides told he must've run his hand through it one too many times.

"Yes. He is."

Rafael furrowed his brows in frustration, elbows resting on his knees as he clasped his hands together. "You hate him."

"Yes. I do." His inquiry was irritating me. Who was he to snoop around in my life?

"Then why are you not interested in this? Your mother could potentially marry a man who assaulted my father out of pure spite."

If it hadn't been for the way my heart ached from the mere mention of my mother, I probably would've lost my shit already. This guy knew nothing about the relationship between my mother and Sebastian, and even less about how it affected me.

It was close to impossible to understand just how big of an impact Sebastian Williams had on my life. His mere presence made my skin crawl, and he knew that. He used it to his advantage to make me uncomfortable whenever I'd visited them, probably hoping I'd stop seeing my mother. The fucker was a control freak, not stopping at anything to get what he wanted.

I hated that by proposing to her, he finally got his will. I fucking despised that he'd managed to drive a wedge between my mom and me, two people who'd only ever had each other. He'd just gone and ripped that connection apart like it was nothing.

"What makes you think I'm not interested?" I focused back on Rafael, trying my hardest to find the right course of action.

He blinked a few times. "Uh, well, you haven't said anything at the dinner table and I—"

"Of course I'm fucking interested in whatever crimes this piece of shit has committed." Rage was flaring through my veins and into my fingertips, making me ball my hands into fists to ease the burning sensation. Until now, I'd avoided speaking about him or my mother to get a grasp on things, and I just now realized how much damage would be done if I didn't take care of this.

I couldn't run forever.

"Then why don't you agree with me?" Rafael's eyebrows arched in confusion.

My gaze went to the garage adjacent to the backyard. Florence's silhouette moved behind the curtains of its illuminated window, followed by the sound of metal dropping to the ground. She'd been in there for an hour now, barely in sight but always audible with the way her tools hit the ground or she cursed in frustration.

"Because you don't just go against the people you love," I said. The words felt like poison on my tongue, like the universe despised me for saying them.

I'd left my mother because of the decisions she'd made, furious at her choice of a spouse. But this was her life she was living, and she had a right to do what she wanted with it. This wasn't my responsibility, and yet it felt like it did. Enough so that I'd made it my mission to make sure she knew I disapproved of her actions.

Was I any better than Rafael, who went behind his family's back to give them answers?

"Is that why you're not going after him? Out of respect for your mother?"

His question caught me off guard. I'd had ten years to bring Sebastian Williams down, and yet I'd done nothing against him. My mother had pleaded with me, begged me to drop the topic and accept her choices.

Maybe I shouldn't have.

"There's more people involved here than just my mother or your father," I reminded him, still eyeing the garage. "You're just watching the meteor through a telescope, completely disregarding the world it's about to shatter into."

He blinked a few times. "What do you mean?"

The silhouette leaning against the garage window made me sigh, and I turned back around to face the guy who'd wreaked so much havoc on so many lives tonight.

"Have you ever considered that maybe your mother doesn't want to be constantly reminded of the day she lost the husband she once knew? Have you even thought about Florence, who dropped everything to care for her father, saw the worst of him, and still respected his boundaries? What do you think she feels, knowing you went not only behind your father's back but also behind hers? She trusts you, Rafael, and you used that trust to follow a vendetta that had absolutely nothing to do with you." The words poured from my lips like rain on a stormy night.

Without mercy.

"He's my father!" Rafael got up from the sofa, arms crossing in front of his chest. "It has everything to do with me." His voice quivered, and I got the feeling there was so much more behind anything he said. The raw emotion in his eyes told me this wasn't just about pride or curiosity. There was something else, something much more intense and raw, that gave him the need for vengeance, not just for his father.

He wanted vengeance for himself.

"And what happens to your family in the process doesn't matter?" I asked incredulously.

"Of course it does! I'm doing this for them."

I shook my head. "You're not. I don't know why you're doing it, but if it were for the sake of your family, you wouldn't act this way. This doesn't help either of them."

"And who are you to determine what my family needs and doesn't need?" He scoffed, irritation rolling off of him in violent waves. This was unlike anything I'd known about the usually rather reserved guy who always had a smile on his lips, joking around the paddock like it was his job. At this moment, Rafael Nyx was anything but amused.

He was out for blood.

"It's not like you stuck around when things got hard all those years ago, did you?" He continued, his words venomous and full of rage. "All you did was create a scandal, break my sister's heart, and then fucking leave like a coward. You have no right to tell me I'm going against my family when that's exactly what you did! You just fucking left her!"

My fingers itched from the urge to shut him up. It took a lot of self-restraint and awareness to stay planted in my spot in front of the window, the chill air doing nothing against the fury I felt.

The problem was, he was right. I hadn't been there when things got hard for Florence. I hadn't been there when she had to help keep the house clean, her father healthy, and her mom sane. It was the pinnacle of guilt that'd eaten away at me since the day I'd left this cursed backyard, knowing damn well that somewhere deep inside, she'd wanted me to stay.

Just remembering that day, watching the swing set in the yard flutter in the gentle wind, sent me into a spiral I had no interest in being in. I'd moved on from the boy I'd been back then. My morals were clearer now, and I'd never been this determined in my life. Not even Rafael's infuriating words would make me lose control.

I just had to get the fuck out of here before I did or said something I'd regret.

"I'm leaving." Grabbing my phone and keys from the nightstand, I headed for the door. Rafael stared at me until I was just a couple of feet away from him, his eyes wide in surprise as I stopped in my tracks. "This is a conversation you should have with your sister and parents, not me. They are the ones who've sacrificed things. Much more than you probably know."

He swallowed hard, his gaze softening before he looked at his feet. I could tell he was trying to find the right thing to say, probably to defend his actions by telling me he had his own burden to carry.

And I was sure he had. This entire family had to process what'd happened, each in their own way.

Florence just did so in the most selfless sense of all.

Fuck. I really had to get to her.

My hand was on the door handle, and I was ready to swing it shut behind me to end this conversation, when I heard him speak.

"She told you to leave that day." His eyes were wide when they met mine again. I could practically feel the realization dawning on him as he covered his lips with his palm.

"Yes, she did."

"And you listened?"

I hesitated. "Greatest mistake of my life, but yes. I did."

"Why?" The disbelief was so clear in his voice, I almost felt for him.

Why had I left that day?

I'd asked myself that question a million times. Maybe more. It didn't matter how I looked at it... the answer always remained the same.

"Because she thought she wanted me to. Her entire life came crumbling down, and she held onto the belief that this was what she had to do. Who was I to demand she left her faith?" A sigh fled my lips as I tightened my grip on the door handle, ready to leave. "Sometimes what we want doesn't matter. Sometimes we just have to respect the boundaries set in place, and move on."

And that's what I did. I closed the door behind me, instantly making my way down the stairs and outside.

The horizon had swallowed the sun by now, leaving the world in a dark red glow that was just on the verge of merging into the calm darkness of the night. I marched out the front door and circled the building, the garage coming into view and getting closer with every step.

My entire body felt electrified when I threw the door open, metal going against metal as it slammed shut behind me. With long, determined strides, I made my way through the garage, scanning the area.

I spotted her at the front of the pickup truck, her upper body hidden behind the hood, while one bare leg was angled upward as the other kept her grounded. Her dark green dress was stained and inched up her thighs as she leaned in further, almost hoisting herself into the engine room of the truck.

Despite all the chaos of tonight, a smile played on my lips. I prayed to everything that was out there that she'd never fail to have that effect on me, that her mere sight would forever take my breath away.

I knew it would.

Right when I tiptoed toward her, both of her legs swung in the air and she pointed the flashlight at something at the far end of the engine room. She used her other hand to reach into the spot, and as she angled herself sideways to give herself better access, her gaze landed on mine.

Florence paused, wide eyes staring back at me as I approached her. I could tell she was trying to get out of her position, but my hands found their way around her hips before she could. Lifting her from the hood, I elicited a screech from her throat as I brought her back to the ground.

"Phoenix!" She exhaled that damn heartbreaking giggle, and I took just a split second to take in the entirety of her. The stains on her dress resembled those on her arms, covering half her body in all sorts of mechanical dirt, and the intense scent of gasoline set my heart on fire just the way I loved it most. Her hair was a whole mess on her head, single strands standing up to all sides.

She was fucking breathtaking, and I couldn't waste another second. Not even to hear her melodic voice speak.

"What are you—"

I slammed my lips onto hers, startling her enough to drop the flashlight from her fingers. The clatter echoed through the garage as I cupped her face with my hands and pressed her against the truck, bathing in the gasp that fled her throat upon collision.

Primal instinct coursed through me as she raked her fingers through my hair, pulling me closer, deepening the kiss. My heart threatened to jump out of my chest from the intensity of her, from how her slightest touch could set my entire world on fire.

She melted in my arms, a quiet whimper fleeing her lips as I pressed myself closer against her. It wasn't enough — it never was.

My shaky hands held onto her, desperately needing the skin on skin contact to keep my heart pumping. Florence was what I needed, craved, longed for in the most terrifying of ways.

"I'm not leaving you again," I whispered. The words felt heavy on my tongue, like a truth I'd kept hidden away for too long.

Florence leaned back to look at me, her eyes glassy in a way that made me want to hold her in my arms for the rest of my life.

"I don't care what lie you come up with or what doubt is planted in your brain by some fucking piece of paper... I'm not ever leaving you again, you hear me?"

She stared at me for a long moment, wide eyes sparkling with an entire milky way of emotions. Her mouth opened to speak but closed a split second later, the storm in her eyes obvious as ever.

"You're the one who has to leave me if that's what you ever wish to, because I'm not doing it again." Every inch of me had to make sure she understood how serious I was. "I've made the biggest mistake of my life by not calling you out on your damn lie back then. I wasn't selfish enough to demand the truth and fight for us, but I've changed, Flo. I'm selfish enough to have fallen in love with you again and again and again, and I'm selfish enough to fucking fight for you with everything that I have."

Flo swallowed hard, her delicate fingers traveling up to my face, cupping my jaw. Her thumb brushed over my cheeks as she just looked at me, letting the raging fire in her green-blue eyes burn me alive.

"Do you understand me?" I needed to hear her say it, needed to make sure she knew. "I'll burn the world down and start wars for you, Florence, but I will never, ever walk out of your life. Tell me you understand that."

The urgency in my voice was palpable enough to make me shiver, the intensity of this moment sending me into vertigo while I took a deep breath, trying to calm my pounding heart. No idea how long it could keep pumping until she gave me a response.

"I understand," Flo finally said, her voice shaky but confident. The softness of her lips was like balm to my soul as she kissed me again, short but determinedly. "I'm sorry I asked you to do that. It wasn't fair."

Her gasoline scent lingered in the air as I pulled her closer, as if that was somehow possible. That was all I needed to know, and it gave me a new sense of life as I inhaled her cinnamon shampoo.

"I'm sorry, too," I whispered.

"For what?" With furrowed brows, she looked up at me, her watery gaze soft and sincere.

"For not being here when you carried the weight of the world on your shoulders." I brushed my thumb over her cheeks, watching how they blushed ever so slightly. "You should've had someone to lean on during that time. I should've fought harder."

The truth in those words hit me like a freight train, knocking the air right out of my lungs. For years I'd wondered if maybe, just maybe, she would've let me in if I'd just tried hard enough.

"I left you alone, too, Phoenix." She swallowed hard, tears almost spilling over. My thumb instinctively went to the corner of her eyes, catching her emotions before they could fall. "I sent you away knowing you'd have to pick yourself back up. That's the most selfish thing I've ever done, and it turned out to be one of the most colossal mistakes of my life. I just... I didn't know what to do. I was so overwhelmed."

Overwhelmed was the understatement of the century. I'd seen the way her eyes had wavered back then, fighting a war of guilt and need right in front of me. Florence hadn't just been overwhelmed... She'd been helpless.

And for a woman like her, someone who'd always known the solution to every problem, that must've been her own personal hell.

"It's okay." I nodded, kissing away another tear. "I was, too."

Her body melted into mine as she wrapped her arms around my torso, resting her head on my chest. My heart thundered violently against it, threatening to break free as I felt our connection grow even deeper. Florence had always touched my soul, but when she opened herself up to me, when she literally invited me in with open arms, it was like I entered a whole new dimension of emotion.

"I love you," she muttered, and my heart stopped.

Well, fuck that — it wasn't just my heart that stopped. My entire fucking world stood still as she looked up at me, her intense green-blue eyes glistening with warmth.

"I'm sorry I lied back then. I loved you, and I still do."

It was the most Florence way to declare her love to me.

Straight to the point.

"I love you." That was all I knew to say, since it was the most universal truth I'd known.

Whatever dimension I lived in — I'd fall in love with her, again and again and again.

"That's good," she whispered, brushing a soft kiss on my lips. "Because I need you to break some rules now." Her eyes danced with mischief as she wrapped her arms around my neck, fingers digging into my skin. "I don't want to spend another night without you," she admitted, and even though I really didn't think it was possible... my heart grew a little more.

I was genuinely surprised it hadn't broken out of my chest yet.

Not giving her another second to think, I hoisted Flo up my shoulder, evoking a row of squeals and curses as I carried her out of the garage. "Phoenix! I can walk!"

"You asked me to break the rules, so break the rules I will." I grinned as I carried her through the front door, not even caring about any suspicious bystanders. There wasn't much that could keep me away from her now.

"That wasn't what I meant!" Her giggle contradicted the mock appall in her voice, and I smiled in return. After the night we'd had, I was glad to hear her laugh again.

"Should've been more precise then, Pancake."

Part of me thanked the universe for not sending any family members in our way as I carried her up the stairs and into her room, the door falling shut behind me. She squealed when I threw her onto the bed and followed behind, shrugging off my shoes on the way.

I caged her in, her dark hair sprawled across the white sheets as she looked up at me with those big eyes. It was a sight for the gods: her beautifully chaotic being vibrated with warm energy and a hint of hard work, most of which still covered her dress in oily stains.

Florence was the most magnificent being I'd ever laid my eyes on, especially when she stared at me with so much heat that I felt my entire body burn. I knew she wanted me — and fuck me, did I want her, too. More than I could explain.

I bent down and pressed a kiss on her neck, not missing the content sigh that fled her lips. Her fingers dug into my hips, holding on and pulling me closer, but I halted before our bodies could collide. The grumble leaving her lips made me glance back at her, impatience and even a little frustration now bubbling to the surface.

Leaning down, I allowed my lips to brush over hers before I looked straight into her eyes.

"One of these days, I'll make love to you, Florence." My fingers itched to brush over her burning cheeks, but I held myself steady on top of her. "And when I do, you'll know just how much I fucking missed you."

Her breath hitched before she swallowed hard, wide eyes staring back at me.

"Why not now?" she asked, her hands wandering up my chest and seriously testing my resolve.

"Because, love..." Feathering kisses down her jaw, I grazed my teeth at that spot behind her ear I knew she loved so much. The way she inhaled sharply made me smirk as I whispered, "there are people in this house. And I'm the only one who should hear you scream my name."

Her fingers dug into my neck as I pressed one last kiss on her cheek and lay down next to her, watching how she pressed her legs together with a sigh. It literally took all of me to not open them again and do whatever she wanted me to do with her.

"I hate you..." Flo groaned before turning toward me, her face hiding in my chest.

"No, you don't." I chuckled while pulling her closer, her soft body reminding me of all the warmth she'd brought into my life.

"No, I don't."

I smiled at the way she held onto my shirt, diminishing the distance between us.

"Tell me again."

She looked up from the little space she had, her tired but sincere eyes meeting mine. "I love you."

"And I love you." Pressing another kiss on her forehead, I wrapped her in my arms and held her as tightly as I could. "Goodnight, love."

"Night, Blueberry."

***

I woke up to a familiar soft snore in my arms.

Florence lay on my chest, mouth wide open, while her hair covered her entire face. It was an ethereal sight, really.

Being as gentle as I could, I moved some hair out of her face, desperately needing to see more of her. More of the woman I loved.

The woman who loved me.

"I don't want to get up," she mumbled, grimacing as she hid from the rising sun with her face in the crook of my neck.

"Good morning to you, too." I snickered and pressed a kiss on her head, inhaling her spicy scent. "It's six thirty," I answered the question I knew would've been coming in a minute, anyway.

"Fuck. That's so late." Flo rolled to the side, exposing herself to light coming in through the window.

"Pretty sure the rest of the world would beg to differ."

She carefully opened her eyes, squinting from the brightness, just so she could roll them at me. "Good thing I'm not the rest of the world, then."

Well, she definitely was the rest of mine.

"How are you feeling today?" I asked, running my fingers through her hair.

The silence that followed was both expected and surprising. I knew I'd only get an honest answer, yet thought maybe she couldn't tell me what she felt yet.

But Florence wouldn't be Florence if she didn't know exactly who she was. I'd never met a person so in touch with her emotions.

"I'm angry, sad, frustrated..." She sighed, rolling back so she could face me. Her eyes were still droopy but held a clearness that was unmatched by anything I'd ever seen as they searched my face. "I'm curious, though. I know I shouldn't be, but they've kept me in the dark for a decade. I've blamed myself long enough..."

Her gaze flicked to the hand that still rested on my chest, carefully watching her painted fingernails.

"Part of the reason I sent you away back then was that I thought I didn't deserve your support, you know? I was the one who gave Dad something to worry about before he got into the car that day. I should've seen the stats on the screen, should've double checked before he put that helmet on."

"Flo..." I was about to interject, but she simply kept rambling.

"For ten fucking years I've lived with this, respecting Dad's wishes just for Rafael to fuck it all up." She shook her head, brows furrowed before her gaze met my own again. "He went behind my back. That's what hurts the most."

I didn't know what to say. There was nothing I could offer that could help ease the pain. Nothing but me.

And it seemed like she knew that, her hand finding my own before she placed it on my chest and propped her chin on top of it, gazing up at me with her determined eyes.

"Don't ever lie to me," she said. There was a fragility to her tone that broke my heart. She didn't deserve any of the harm she'd been through.

"Not ever. I promise."

A kiss on my fingers was the first response I got before she looked back up at me. "Good. Because this has the potential to get really damn ugly. And I don't want us caught up in this."

Look at my girl go. She was so fucking inspiring.

"We won't be. No lies, no secrets." I sealed our deal with a kiss to her other hand, which she then cupped around my jaw. "And you already know I got your back, Flo. Unconditionally."

"And I yours," she responded softly. "We will figure out what happened. We will find a way to get your mom out of this mess, and we will make sure the whole world knows not to cross us again."

Determination flared in her irises as she sat up, flung her legs over the bed, and took a deep breath. I could practically hear the oxygen flood through her lungs before she exhaled again, her demeanor calming as she stared out the window.

"But first... I have a brother to kill."

Author's Note

Hey, folks!

Well well well... what a chapter! Lots of progress ahead of us.

These intense chapters are always fun to write but also take a lot of emotional processing out of me. I can resonate with some of the things both Flo and Phoenix are going through — my characters are always a little bit me, too.

I do create them, after all. Lol!

Hope you're all doing well and hanging in there. I appreciate your support!

Lots of love as always

Jane