Nix

I a m s u r e t h a t i a m s l e e p i n g . . .

B u t . . .

T h i s
i s
n o t
m y
r o o m . . .

Startled, I'm trying to raise my consciousness. I feel the cold wind browsing my body, i could hear the sound faintly whistling in my ears. I look around only to find a snow-covered mountain. Am I dreaming? No, the cold is too poignant to my subconscious.

Qualmish, i start to walk slowly towards the lake. Curiously trying to put my hand on the water.

C o l d...

How do i end up here?

This uneasy feeling won't go away. I feel like i want to puke, but i just can't. I splash my face with a cold water, hoping that i would wake up. The temperature quickly soothing through my skin, is it real?

My head is spinning so fast, my breath is racing with the ticks of my watch. I have to lay down.

"Daddy what are you doing there?"

W h o i s s h e?

I s s h e m y d a u g h t e r?

I didn't answer. She is just running joyfully towards me, her short wavy hair wiggling around as she runs. I can see how enthusiastic she is to see me. She hug me with her little arm, i can't control my reaction but to hug her back right away, a familiar feeling.

"I just went skiing with my mom, it's so much fun. Can we go to the husky village later, pleaaaaseeee?"

Her bunny teeths peek out of her smile. I could only guess from whom she had that chubby cheeks. I pinch it lightly, and nod my head as a yes.

"Mom caught a flu. She's in the hotel room. Could we buy a soup for her? Some medicine? A polar bear? Can we raise a polar bear at home?"

Yeah for sure, she's my daughter. She hold my hand and dragging me back all the way to the hotel. I'm trying to slow her down a little. I just come to realization, who exactly that girl who's dumb enough to be with me?

As we arrived at the hotel, there's a couple of men with a suit and tie approaching us in hurry. I can't really listen to what they're saying but they keep trying to get my attention. Right now, i just don't care with what they said, i honestly just want to go to my hotel room.

After they've done with their ordeal, i hurried myself to get to the elevator. Only to find out there's another men with a suit, trying to talk to me. What exactly is my job? My daughter starts to get grumpy.

W h y c a n t y o u j u s t c o m e a n o t h e r t i m e?

I exhale in relieve, finally it's over. My daughter humming some familiar melody, i'm sure that's the song her mother always sing for her lullaby. She realize that i keeps starring at her, she only throw a smile at me, and i just smile back. I can't believe that i just smiled and how happy i am to be around a child. I must loves her that much.

The elevator dings, 28th floor. She hold my hand and quickly dragging me to my room. So this is it? Am i going to see the face of my wife? How does she looks like?

My breath slowly fades away as we getting closer to the room. I tripped myself and fall but my daughter keeps running away. What is this feeling? Why is it so hard to breath? My head is getting dizzy again.

I can see from afar my daughter is standing next to the door. She open it, can i take a peek inside? I'm crawling, trying hard to reach the door but somehow it's slowly getting away.

I'm trying to rise with all my strength, i can do this. I walk slowly and gradually trying to run. It's getting close. I suddenly stop. Am i ready to know who she is? Or am i already know her? I starts to stutter, i'm not sure whether i want to see her inside or not. I back away a couple of steps. It's just a dream, i'm sure it's just a dream.

W h e r e ' s y o u r d a d?

Is that her voice? I can only hear faintly as my consciousness started to fade away. No, i'm sure i want to see her. I want to know who she is. I want to tell her what she needs to know. It only a couple steps away..............................

I t w a s o n l y a d r e a m?

I can't lift my head off the pillow. I grab my phone trying to reach someone. I need to be sure which one's reality. I slap myself hard to make sure that i'm awake..

I a m a w a k e...

For the first time in forever, i tear myself up. How do i miss someone that's not even in my life? If it's just a dream why would i feel so hollow awake? I grab my bolster trying to reimagine someone that i hugged before, someone that i should hug after.

T h e n i x t o m y c h a r o n...

I grab my towel and walk to my bathroom. I finish my shower right after just to find out an empty room with only a single bed in it. I walk outside, only to find my suitcase. I'm saying good bye to my hometown, uncertainty awaits in front of me, but now i'm sure i'm not doing this because i want to forget my life behind me. But to start my journey to be wherever you are.

A/N: Dedicated to be your goodnight story.

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