It felt like something had crawled into her mouth and died overnight. Possibly that Lurch fella. 

Charlie knew immediately before she opened her eyes that she wasn’t at home. She was at Jake’s. Gorgeous, sexy, man-of-few-words (so far anyway) Jake. She also hadn’t actually been asleep for that long as Jake had kept her awake most of the night; ever since they grabbed a cab from one side of the city to the other, hands all over one another, and fallen through his flat door pulling their clothes off as they went.

It had been really good. Exhausting, and muscles she didn't know existed were hurting right now, but it had been amazing. 

She could hear Jake breathing evenly beside her, still fast asleep. He didn’t even snore. God, he was perfection.

Unlike her breath. She subtly reached down to where her bag was on the floor next to the bed and popped a couple of tic-tacs in her mouth. That was immediately better.

Of course, she couldn’t crunch the bloody tic-tacs for fear of waking him up, so she just swirled them about her mouth and watched him sleep. Those eyelashes were ridiculous, and so wasted on a man. His skin was unbelievably golden and his abs . . . oh wow! She sucked in her stomach and vowed to start actually going to the gym, rather than just paying for it. And perhaps give up her doughnut habit while she was at it. 

He started to stir and she panicked. It had been so long since she had a one-night-stand and she had forgotten what the protocol was. Was she meant to already have sneaked off? Was he hoping she would have done? Would he be disappointed to wake up and find her still there? She accidentally swallowed the Tic-Tacs whole and started choking in fright. 

Well, he was definitely going to wake up now.

Responding to her choking he sat up, and reached over for a bottle of water at the side of his bed while patting her on the back. She recovered herself and he passed her the water, already opened for her to drink from. Whispering thanks, she sipped it, looking away from him, absolutely mortified.

“Hey,” he whispered in her ear, and she turned around, startled. He smiled at her, his gray eyes sparkling and she felt hope rise in her chest. “That was some wake-up call,” he went on, laughter in his voice as he stroked her face, pulling her closer. “Come here.” 

So she did.

---------------------

Thea wasn’t feeling her best either. After Charlie had disappeared off with Jake (and Thea had made sure she had his details just in case she never reappeared), she had finally felt like she could properly relax. The plan had succeeded, all was right with the world. Now she could get properly drunk.

Of course, she already was properly drunk - it just hadn’t caught up with her yet. But it had, big time.

Now, several hours later, she came to on the couch, still fully dressed, apart from her shoes, which were kicked off. Her feet were dirty, the couch was white. Oh dear. At least it wasn’t her couch.

“Hey.” Her knight in shining armour was standing there, cup of coffee in hand. He held it out. “For you.”

“Thanks.” She took it, biting her lip apologetically. “Sorry about the couch.”

He waved off the apology. “It’s fine, honestly.” He sat down beside her, awkwardly. “We probably need to talk.”

“I might need something stronger than coffee for that,” she replied edgily, feeling scared because she had no idea what was going to happen next. Last night had spiralled out of control and the world she thought she knew was no longer. It was a terrifying feeling, so unsettling.

“Thea . . .” he started.

“I know we do,” she replied quietly, staring into her cup. “I just don’t know where to start, Dave.”

---------------------

She wasn’t quite sure why she had phoned Dave at midnight.

Actually, she knew exactly why. Because, the day before, on the drive into work, Dave had told her he was going on a date on Saturday night.

“It’s a girl from work, she’s new to Glasgow,” he’d told her. “I’m not actually even sure if it’s a date, or she just wants me to squire her around town.” They’d both smiled at the Anchorman reference but Thea could feel her grin was forced. And she had no idea why.

“So where are you taking her, Mr Burgundy?” she had quipped barely listening to his response. Why was this bothering her so much? Dave wasn’t her personal property, she had no right to keep him for herself. She was just so used to him always being there for her, her back-up Craig. 

She’d been distracted all of Saturday wondering if the date had started yet, how they were getting on. Had they kissed? Were they back at his? Was he in love? 

And so, at midnight, she had phoned him. She’d told herself she was phoning Craig, but her finger scrolled right past C and on to D. And hit “call” before she could think otherwise.

“Thea?” He’d answered on the second ring, sounding alert. “Everything okay?”

“Hi, yes, everything is fine.” She felt ridiculous, but she needed to know he was alone. “Um - how was the date? Or is it still going on and I’m interrupting?”

She heard him sigh down the phone. “It was . . . okay, I guess. I don’t think there’s going to be a follow-up though. I don’t think either of us felt it was right. I’m just heading home now actually.”

She swallowed nervously. “Do you fancy a nightcap? I’m just finishing up here myself and you always have a good range of whisky at yours.” What was she doing? It was as if someone else had taken over her body and decisions. 

He paused. “Sure.” He sounded uncertain. “If you want?”

She nodded firmly, then realised he couldn’t see her. “Yes. Yes that would be great,” she affirmed. “I’ll jump in a taxi now. See you soon.” She hung up.

On the way over to his, she wondered what she was doing. She still didn’t really understand what was happening, but something was pulling her over there. Some force she didn’t seem to be able to resist.

“I don’t really know why I’m here” she announced as he opened the door to her ten minutes later.

“That makes two of us,” he replied, running his hand through his hair. He passed her a tumbler with a massive amount of whisky in it and sat down at his kitchen table. She sat down opposite, her insides feeling like they were squeezing together. “Are you okay Thea?”

“No,” she blurted out. “I mean, yes. I mean, god, I don’t know.” She took a big gulp of whisky and shuddered as it hit her throat. She closed her eyes for a second and when she opened them, he was looking straight at her, his eyes soft.

“You look lovely,” he said, out of nowhere. “Good night?”

She felt herself blushing. What on earth? She never blushed! “Thanks,” she smiled. “Yeah, it was a great night. We even managed to get Charlie a man.”

“Good work.” He took his own big gulp of whisky, his eyes not leaving her face. “What’s going on? You don’t seem like yourself - you seem really . . . on edge is the best way I can think to put it.”

She probably shouldn’t be here. It was one thing to spend so much time together in a close confined space driving to work and back. Quite another to be alone together, post-midnight, with a bit too much alcohol in her. Especially when she was definitely feeling things she shouldn’t be feeling. Really shouldn’t be feeling. 

And, if she was going to be completely honest, at least with herself, she’d been feeling them for quite some time now. But she probably shouldn’t say that out loud. Should she? It would open the ultimate can of worms if she did.

“What do you think about me?” she found herself asking. She couldn’t look at him. She was scared of what he might answer.

He paused for a long moment before he replied.

“I think you’re great.”

“Is that it?” she asked, her voice flat.

“What do you want me to say, Thea?” Dave pushed his chair back from the table, one of the legs screeched against the floor and made her jump. He stalked over to the bottle of whisky on the countertop and sloshed a massive amount of amber liquid into his glass. She hadn’t even realised he’d drained his glass already. She looked down and realised her glass was also empty. She had no memory of drinking it beyond the first gulp.

He took her glass from her and topped it up. She still hadn’t spoken. She didn’t know the answer. What did she want him to say? All she knew was that she was wound up like a spring and she needed release of some sort. 

Dave sat back down. He looked tired, she noted. He had dark circles smudged under his clear blue eyes. His face was usually an open book, but tonight she had no idea what he was thinking. “What do you want me to say?” he repeated, his voice low, calmer now than it had been a moment ago. 

“Do you ever think about when we first met?” She finally managed to say.

“At uni?” She could see a muscle twitching in his cheek as he stared down into his glass as if searching for the answer. Or planning to drown himself in it in order to escape, possibly.

Oh god, she thought, here we go. Regardless of what happened next, nothing was ever going to be the same. She took a deep breath and dove in.

“I mean . . . at the punch party.” His head jerked up, his eyes wide at her words. She hesitated, but she had to finish. “The night we kissed.” 

His mouth dropped open. “You remember?” he gasped. “I didn’t think . . . you didn’t ever say . . . you . . .” He couldn’t seem to find the words. No wonder. In all of the time Thea and Dave had known each other, they had never addressed that night. For all Thea had known, Dave didn’t even remember.

“Of course I remembered. I remember everything.” Thea nodded her head, finding she couldn’t look at him. “I just - I was scared. I really liked you but I thought it was maybe just a drunken thing for you and then you never mentioned it so . . . I guess it just seemed easier to pretend it hadn’t ever happened. I wasn’t even sure if you remembered it.” She shrugged, although that was the last thing she felt like doing. Perhaps if she hadn’t shrugged it off at the time, she wouldn’t be in this messed up situation right now.

He stood up again and walked over to the window, his back to her. “Of course I remember” he said after a moment. He turned around, and his expression was now clear. He was torn between relief and some sort of pain. 

“Sometimes, when I’m around you, it’s all I can think about.”

His words hit Thea like a bolt of lightning to her stomach. It was as if the world had been black and white and it suddenly lit up in technicolour, fireworks fizzing in her head. That horrible, uncomfortable churning feeling she’d been experiencing inside for months now, which had intensified in power from the moment Dave had mentioned his date . . . it left her. She felt free.

“Really?” she asked, barely daring to breathe. He nodded and her world lit up more. “Me too,” she admitted, feeling unbearably shy.

He sat back down. “What a mess.” And those words brought her back to reality. Because, yes, it would have been amazing if they had both just spoken about that kiss back when it happened. But they hadn’t. And now there was Craig. 

Regardless though . . . right now, the electricity was buzzing between them. How could they go back to the norm now? How could they drive to work and back knowing they had each been nursing the secret memory of that night all these years? 

“I should go.” Thea reluctantly got to her feet.

“Yeah, I guess you should,” he replied. But as she neared the door he added “But please don’t.”

She paused. Turned. He was standing right there and, as she looked questioningly at him, he pulled her into him and placed his lips on hers, just for the quickest briefest moment. Sparks shot through her, even in that millisecond. He pulled back and looked at her, his eyes sparkling. “Stay for a while,” he said. “We don’t have to do anything. I just want to be around you. Let’s watch TV on the couch and have a glass of wine and pretend this isn’t the fucked up situation it is.”

She nodded. Followed him into the living room. Sunk onto the couch and lay her head on his shoulder. She couldn’t believe how right it felt.

Tomorrow was another day.

---------------------

But now it was officially tomorrow, and she wasn’t sure she could face this new reality. And it was all her fault. She had opened Pandora’s box and revealed her feelings to Dave and everything had changed. And, of course, she had no idea if Dave actually felt the same. 

Sure, he’d said he thought about that kiss quite a lot, but maybe it had just been unfinished business to him. 

They hadn’t spoken any more after that brief peck on the lips last night, however the atmosphere between them had been charged as they watched old episodes of “Friends” and emptied half a bottle of red between them. He’d dropped a couple of kisses on her shoulder but otherwise had been a total gentleman.

Right now, she didn’t feel like she could talk about things. She wouldn’t have the first clue where to even begin. And what would it accomplish anyway? She hadn’t even properly considered Craig in this whole situation.

She put the coffee down. “I’m going to go,” she said. He opened his mouth to protest but she put her hand up. “I know, we do need to talk. But I need some time. Please understand.”

“I do understand” he said quietly. “But one last thing . . .” He leaned over and kissed her again, gently and slowly. Sweetly. He pulled back and touched her lips with his finger, regret in his eyes, and then lead her to the door. 

“I probably shouldn’t have done that,” he said as he let her out. “But I felt like I needed my fix.” His face twisted as he said it. “I’ll see you at eight am tomorrow?”

Thea nodded and walked outside, feeling tears prick her eyes. 

She had a terrible feeling she’d just blown everything.

---------------------

“I really need to get going,” Charlie said reluctantly. “Do you know any cab numbers off the top of your head?”

She didn’t want to burst the perfect bubble that had been last night by leaving . . .but she worried the longer she stayed the more she worried she was outstaying her welcome. Every time she made a move to leave though Jake would pull her back into bed.

He sat up in bed and surveyed her thoughtfully. “I can give you a lift but you’re fine to stay as long as you want. I’ve got no plans today.”

“I’d really better go, I’ve got loads on my to-do list,” she said reluctantly.

“Oh yeah, you’ll have wedding planning to do I guess,” he nodded. “Makes sense. I’ll quickly grab a shower and then I can drop you back at yours no bother.” He jumped out of bed, unashamedly naked, and wandered over to the en suite. Charlie eyed his bum admiringly. 

But his words had reminded her - as far as he was concerned, she was getting married. Which was a bit of a pain, as she really wanted to see him again. Of course, there was a little voice telling her it was a bit odd that Jake had went out of his way to get with a girl on their hen night but then, you can’t help who you fall for surely? He hadn’t even mentioned it until now and, by the time he’d reappeared in the club, she had misplaced her “bride” veil somewhere so she wasn’t even sure he had even realised she was on a hen night.

Think, think. She sat on the edge of the bed, her head in her hands, trying to figure out a plan. How could she get to see Jake again without him finding out the truth? It seemed like an impossible plan.

In the meantime though . . . she smiled, stood up and padded into the ensuite. After all, she really needed a shower too and saving water was very important . . .