Namjoon.

This weekend, was so far the best I have ever had in my life. I know I say that a lot, but you would too if you were in my shoes. Being with Seokjin is incredible. He is passionate, lovable, nice, caring, lively, thoughtful, you name it. I feel like I am living when I am with him, a person, when he is around me. We spent the weekend doing all sorts of things, we cooked, we talked, he sewed me that outfit for my friend's wedding, and of course we got to make love.

We had plenty of time really, to relish and love each other. Three times through the weekend we had sex, once for each day since Friday, and don't forget the amazing shower experience this morning. He is amazing, what he does with his sexy body, what he conveys with his lips and fuck the way his hands work. I am awed, I knew it was going to feel nice to be with him, but it's more than that, it's heavenly, he is heavenly, god sent.

My long term goal is to get more than just his body though, I want his heart too, I want more than just friendship or mere relationships, I am looking forward to something serious. It's a long shot, and getting him to feel things for me might be a problem, because he is way out of my league.  Not just financially, but physically too. He is definitely beautiful, with a good heart, and doesn't deserve me with the few things I have to offer him. I know he hasn't, and would never make me feel, like I don't belong with him, and for this reason I have gained hope, I fear I have plunged this deeper so soon, I've grown these feelings for him so fast, things I don't think I could ever take back if something ever goes wrong.

But you can't blame me, I can't hold anything back when it comes to him, maybe because I have held on for so long, way back since I saw him those months ago. And now given this rare opportunity to be with him, I've let everything go, and allowed myself to feel and express for him. I know he feels something too, maybe not as strong as I feel for him, but there is something there, I know it, I feel it from him. The way he looks at me says something, the way the kisses, and touches me means something, otherwise I'd be gravely wrong if this is all in my head.

This morning we walked to work together, we are not officially boyfriends, but we did it, then later had lunch together in the company of our nosy friends, and by that I mean Jackson and Solar, who wanted to know if we finally did it. For the fun of it, Seokjin and I both denied it, and once again they had to pay Hoseok for another false bet lost this week. I guess being evil with Seokjin is nice as well, how ironic.

"What is it now?" Jackson asks in a playfully tone, making his way to me and trying to peak at my phone. I pull it way, locking it and putting it back in my jeans. I am not letting him in on that, or anything regarding Seokjin for that matter. Not because he is flirty and would make a move on him (which he wouldn't, he's not like that) but because he is nosy, and I get off annoying him sometimes.

"Yo, dude show me." He grumbles attracting a few unsurprised stares from the other workers. "Nope, that was for my eyes only." I reply getting back to work while Jackson follows around even more intrigued. "Shoot, he sent you nudes?" He inquires, a mischievous smile stretching on his lips. I can't believe Seokjin still thinks I am the perverted one, he has obviously never met the real Jackson.

"No nudes, just a picture." I say, not bothered to put up any defense, he doesn't buy it, and let's out a laugh, stomping his feet like a little kid. He is way more excited for this adventure I have with Seokjin than anyone, and I appreciate that from him, from my best friend. "You can just say yes, I am not going to ask you to show me." He amuses again, patting my back. "Good, because I would never show you." A little possession is present in my voice, unmasked jealousy as well, and he hears it, grinning even wider before slapping me upside the head. "You know I am just playing, no need to get all worked up about it." He assures, his face more composed to show me his seriousness.

"I happy for you men, you've wanted this for so long, and now your living it, you look better than you've been in a while." He knows me so well, he has been my buddy since I came to Seoul, showed me how life here worked, and helped through rough times. He rooted for me when I first saw Seokjin, supported, and pushed me to pursue whatever it is I was feeling. He might be flirty, and perverted, but he is still my best friend, and I love him for that.

"Thanks man." I say sincerely, bringing his hand for a shake. He nods with a smile, before tightening his grip on my hand, "ok, but were those nudes though?" He asks playfully. I don't need to answer, and I know he is just joking, but knowing Jackson, he'll continue to tease me about it through out the day.

"No they weren't nudes, just him and blue." I say with a smile recalling the cute picture I received. Seokjin himself had been a tease and sent a text first, stating it was for my eyes only. I won't lie I did think he was going to come through with something naughty, but pulled a first one on me with that cute picture of him kissing blue. But I appreciated it more, since popping a boner at work wouldn't be so ideal.

"Who is blue?" Jackson asks confused bringing me out of my thoughts. "Our dog." I reply absentmindedly, only realizing what I said when Jackson smirks. "Your already having things together huh?" He teases poking my side. God, why did I tell him?

"Kim?" We both turn around at the sound of the supervisor, who is stood by the door to the room, his clipboard in hand, "yes sir?"

"Your free to go." He states, still writing away on his board. We still got an hour or so before completion today, if am not wrong, so I narrow my eyes at him, not following. "Sorry?" I ask, walking to him, to which he looks up finally, meeting my eyes. "Your free to go today." He repeats again, firm , and I suddenly feel the urge to remind him of today's schedule, but he waves me off instead, sighing in the process. "I know you still got an hour left, but you have a guest waiting in the back, so you can call it a day."

I know well it's not Seokjin. He never comes around my job, and even if he does he would never go through the back, they don't even allow people through the back. Which is why I am even more confused. "Its all taken care of, so don't worry about your overtime hours, just get your things and go, I guess." He says again, not giving me time get in another word as he leaves.

What does that mean, my overtime hours taken care of? I look back at Jackson, who just shrugs with a puzzled look, having heard the whole conversation. "I am gonna go check out who it is, see you later men."

"Take care." Jackson shouts after me as I pick up my things, going down the stairs for the back. I am absolutely clueless of what this might be about,  none of my family members would come around without informing me....It just doesn't make sense. I quickly clean up in the bathroom, dusting myself up hastily from any dirt that might have settled on me through the day, before going round the building. I walk to the temporary gate, pulling it open and walking out.

I am met with the threatening face of a tall buff guy, who I have seen before, and been intimidated by as well. As usual he doesn't look too amused to see me, just flat out stares with a frown, which I am starting to think is his normal face. "Dan." I say flatly, remembering his name, but he doesn't answer, only moves from my sight, to point at the car parked a few meters away. I am starting to get the idea of who I might be seeing, just confused as to why, and what. Also why does this seem to be in a hidden place, right at the back where nobody is allowed.

The car window opens, and the very person I dreaded to make an appearance does. She smiles at me, her nicely done face reminding me of my boyfriend. I can already feel like this isn't right, I didn't tell Seokjin the last time, and as a result this might be the second time. I don't want to go, I don't want to do this, whatever it may be, but she doesn't give me a chance as she waves me over, tall buff guy looking ready to push me over if I disagree.

I sigh internally, walking over to the different, yet new model of car she is in, I pull open the door, feeling conscious of my slightly dusty clothes that are about to be on the spotless white interior. "Don't worry about it, get in." She chirps cheerfully, and I glance at her, not sure how to react. She's is oddly happy, not that I know a lot about her to say so, it's just... it's difficult to see her in a different light after last encounter.

I get in, pulling the door close, sitting next to her in the backseat, before bowing to her in greeting. "Ma'am." I say to which she hums in response. "How are you Namjoon?"

"Alright ma'am, how are you?" She takes in an audible breath at the question, a small seemingly sad smile on her face. "I am ok, but I must say, I've had better days." Her gaze is compelling, almost like she wants me ask what is raining on her day, but it's not my place, so I just nod to follow, smiling a bit too. I hope that's reassuring enough.

"I am sorry about pulling you off your work before time. I hope it wasn't of any inconvenience to you." I have a hard time believing she is sorry, I feel like she did it because she could. Able to pay off for my time, and judging by her tone she doesn't think my work is of any importance either, that's alright, it wouldn't be the first time someone did.

"It's ok ma'am."

"Good. Because I wanted to talk about Seokjin." I am not sure I want to do that, especially without his knowledge, for something that might actually be important. It's not fair to him, but I don't think she cares about the position she is putting me or his son. "What about ma'am?"

"About what I discussed with him the last time. It's been a month already, and he hasn't given me a response yet." She looks at me like I have the answer as to why that is so, which I don't. "I am sure he is still weighing on what do ma'am." I reply, pressing my palms on my jeans, and trying to be polite by keeping eye contact. "There is nothing to weigh, I gave him a way out, to come back to his life, away from this place, what more could someone possibly want?" She asks rather calmly then stares at me expectantly. Again, I don't have the answers to this questions, she is asking the wrong person. "I am not sure ma'am, you might want to ask him that." I reply, hinting subtly that this isn't ideal, that he needs to ask Seokjin and not me. But she doesn't get it, or she doesn't care.

"Oh, I have, and I can tell he is going to make a wrong choice, and I think it's mostly influenced by your presence."

"Sorry?" I say immediately, I narrow my eyes at her, and she does the same. Daring. She smiles a bit at me, not at all taken back by the slight outburst. "I am not saying there is anything wrong with the relationship you have with my son, but you have to understand, Seokjin doesn't belong in this place. He is my son for crying out loud, if people found out that, it might not be good for our image, do you know who I am?" Seokjin has mentioned before about her mother's position. She is one of the elites of Seoul, a business woman, and reputation is important to her, but still...

"I don't mean to be disrespectful ma'am, but by all means, this is still Seokjin's choice. If he hasn't given you an answer, or gives you one your not satisfied with, it's still his choice regardless of who or what influences it. My being with Seokjin doesn't prevent him from taking your proposal, I don't believe this has anything to do with me."

Her expression changes at that. I am not shifting the reasons as to why my boyfriend doesn't want to take her proposal on her, am just saying that if she really is concerned, she should re- evaluate why it so to begin with. Why her son even left in the first place. I don't know the whole story, Seokjin hasn't told me everything but I know for him to leave, he must have been pushed to the wall, and she must have been fed up, which makes me wonder why she wants this so bad, it might be to make amends, but Seokjin is right, this seems a little to desperate for someone who just wants things to go back to before.

"I see why my son might be blindsided by you, your intelligent, outspoken and affirmative, traits he has always admired." She pauses, staring at her lap a second, her perfectly manicured nails clutching tight to her black handbag. "Your one of those people who are destined for great things, don't you think so?" Now I am not sure where this going, with her their is always a loop, a gap that I need to fill with my words. What should I answer to that, what even do I think of the unusual praises?

"Such a great career you envision, with such talent and skill you might really go far." I tilt my head back, grasping what she's throwing, how does she know about that. I mean it's not a secret, but still, unless Seokjin told him -which I doubt he did, she has no reason to be interested in that.

"All I want is for you to leave him, trust me, that will ensure he comes back home." Leave Seokjin? That doesn't sound right in my head, or anywhere. I have no reason whatsoever to want to leave him. This is crazy, and getting out of hand, and to think that it's his own mother that wants this. He adores this woman despite everything that has happened between them.

"I am sorry ma'am, but I can't do that." I say, still trying to keep my tone polite, even though I am losing composure with each second. "Are you sure, because if you do this you can have whatever you want, Namjoon. If you want money you have it. If it's a contract with a music label, you got it. Come on, there is something you must want." She urges with a nod. I am speechless at how far she is willing to go, she has offered me money before, here too, and now she is bringing forward then only thing I have always wanted to achieve. It's tempting, because it would be something that would satisfy my every need in life, but it's also disgraceful, I would never do that Seokjin, or anyone. It would be more than betrayal.

She waits on me, a small grin waiting on her lips. I smile a bit, and it visibly makes her happy, probably thinking I have thought of something. "Why really are you doing this?" I ask instead, to which her face falls. She swallows at my gaze, blinking back before regaining her composure.

"To get him back home, of course."

"A little desperate for that, don't you think?" A vein pops up on her forehead, her eyes a little darker than before. She presses her lips into a line, almost like a frown. Now I know I am crossing the respect lines here, but she threw everything off the table and table itself the moment she offered me money again in exchange for leaving her son.

"I told you before ma'am, not even money will make me do anything to your son. He has a right to choose the life he wants to lead. You may not understand why he wants so, but he is grown, and that's his choice." I don't think she gets it, if the scowl on her face is anything to go by, but I can't do anything further about it. That's up to her now. I pause for a second, thinking carefully of my next words.

"I am in love with your son, and I don't want anything to jeopardize that." I confess, not sure why, but compelled to do it at the same time. I don't know if this is what love is, I have never experienced it before, but I have never experienced what I have with Seokjin either. It might not be accurate, but it's true to me.

"If Seokjin ever goes home to you, well and good, it will be his doing, but if he doesn't, I hope you get to understand why that is. Otherwise if this why you sought me out at my job, I would like to leave please." I say, not heeding to my request as I grab the door handle to leave. But of course she has something else to add, like always, something is up her sleeve.

"And Taehyung. Would you do it for your brother?" I whip my head so fast, almost getting a cramp in the process, but I don't care, not for this one. How does she know about that, and why. "Excuse me?" I say a little louder, my fingers clenching at my sides. This is getting way out of hand, and if she went out of her way to dig out my family just because she has the resources, and the ability to, then this is a different story, one I won't tolerate.

"Such a fine young man, but oh, what a rough life. Wouldn't you want to give him what he has missed out on? Do it for him if you won't do it for yourself."

"Do what?" I ask, seething almost. This is my private life, and it's not up for any discussion whatsoever. "Leave my son alone Namjoon, that's all I want." She has got this sinister but serious smile as she says it, it's sickening what she wants, even more how she wants it.

"You know, step by step I am starting to see why your son might have wanted to leave you." I say menacingly, a part of me enjoying the clenching of jaws, and tightening of fists I receive in response. "I don't know how you got a hold of that information, but it's not going to get you anywhere, I might not have riches like you do, but I won't allow you to insult me and my family in that manner."

"I wonder if Taehyung thinks the same. I wonder what he would say if he could get an earlier surgery, and pay out all of your debts. Normal life, out of the province, and out of poverty...." I've lost it on the inside, I can feel so, there is this lump that is forming in my throat at the mention of all this about Taehyung. I don't want to think about what my brother would do, it's not fair.

I obviously underestimated what she is capable of, I didn't think she was this deep into this. "Don't make me force my hand on you." She mutters, her gaze falling into something. "Are you threatening me?" I can't help ask, to which she only snorts, shrugging. "Not yet Namjoon. I am giving you an option still, with benefits on it. All you have to do is leave. It's simple, really." She argues back, all traces of playing nice off the table. This is who she is.

"Don't bring my family into this Miss Soojin-"

"Then you know what to do." She interrupts but I am not done yet, she's not the only determined person here. I don't have to chose between my boyfriend and my family. That's absurd, how did this even get here? "If it wasn't clear earlier, I am not doing anything for you." I clarify, not giving her chance to object as I push open the door and walk out.

Right on cue she calls after me, voice strangely sweet, and eyes suspiciously nice. I know she wants to ask me to keep this between us. Or so I think. Dan, the bodyguard, walks past me, his broad shoulders brushing past mine almost roughly. He opens up the boot, bringing out two full bags, goods I assume. "Why don't you take these groceries to Seokjin-ah, help yourselves to them yeah? I must have bought a lot from the store earlier, and I won't get to use all of it, you know, alone and all." Miss Soojin says softly by the window, eyes pleading. I can't read what she is up to no matter how hard I squint my eyes. It's just not possible with that soft but deceiving smile, not under those innocent but fierce eyes. Regardless I am done playing these games, so I snatch up the bags, keeping my gaze stoic but insanely annoyed on the inside.

"I hope he accepts those, and please tell him I said hello when I ran into you." She is surprisingly cool about this, like she doesn't even care that I will tell Seokjin about what we spoke of. Something that may ruin her plans. Weird.