Seokjin

"He asked you out again, didn't he?" Solar asks as I walk to them.

"He blackmailed me into it."

"Oh, quit whining and acting like you don't like it." Hoseok chimes. "Yeah, you better go home and change into something he could take off easily." Solar adds, sharing a hearty laugh with Hoseok as we walk back to the office. Are they for real right now?

"Is sex all you guys think about?"

"Jin, I get your a hopeless romantic, but what do you expect us to think?" Solar questions pointing at Hoseok and herself. "I don't know...my safety. We are not even sure if he is a good guy, or not. I mean we call him pervert, plus we just started seeing him like six months ago, and we still don't know anything about him."

I know I sound like a paranoid person, blabbering about anything that comes into mind that would distract me and justify my reasons for not wanting to go to dinner with Namjoon. Its because I like the idea of going out with him, a little too much actually. It makes my body and heart do things, a kind of excitement I haven't felt in a while, or ever.

I am not even worried about my safety, not with him. Something about Namjoon makes me feel safe, and protected. Its a stupid feeling, especially for someone I don't really know, and kind of hate, but I can't help it. I can't stop thinking about how last night was, how many times I smiled, and how happy he looked as well.

"You know he is not some serial killer, he is too cute to be doing that shit. Although he would make hot killer if he ever was one..." Solar adds thinking about it, to which Hoseok makes a wtf look. "... But if you really don't wanna go, then don't. Your comfort comes first, although I don't think he would for real blackmail you into going, or force you." It was weird how my friends would switch up that quick, from horny savages, to thoughtful caring people.

"I think I'll just go so I can get over with it. I owe him and I'll pay back, because that's who I am."

"There you go, I thought you were going to pass up on that big dick." Solar cheers shamelessly.

"How do you know he is big?"

"How do you not?" Solar answers incredulously to Hoseok's question, before going ahead to explain how to check for a big dick over clothes.

It sounds like important future information, but my mind veers off to somewhere else, somewhere I don't want it to. I can feel my ears shading just the thought of it, the thought of Namjoon sexually. He is sexually appealing, that I admit. Well built, with bulging muscles, ranging from his arms, to his chest, then thighs and legs. His torso, which I have accidentally seen, is well sculpted, with huge pecs and washboard abs, the lower skin inked with something beautiful which my curiosity itches to find out, and his fingers, he has long nice fingers, with incredibly beautiful nails, and occasional present veins. His palms are a bit rough from the work he does, raw and rugged. And his face, god his face, it is no doubt good to look at, his purple locks being the compliment to everything.

In short he is a man, and I wouldn't be surprised if he is packed downstairs, well endowed with his stick. Shit, why am I thinking about this. I am not usually drawn to people by appearance alone, behavior matters to me, and the natural vibe or pull that I believe draws people together. But now, I can't help think of these dirty things, like Namjoon's body. Naked.

Maybe I am just needy, seeing as I haven't had any sexual contact for almost a year now, let alone touch myself. Sex itself is still new to me, having only had it a few times, with my ex boyfriend, who dumbed me as soon as he found out I was cut off by my mother. So that makes me a rookie still in this department, and even more reason for me to have no business thinking of Namjoon like that, it is dirty, and of course impossible because we hate each other.

One just can't help themselves with a man like that.

Ten minutes later and a vivid description from Solar on how to decipher the size without actually seeing, we arrive back at work. Cruella is still locked away in her office, so we dispersed to our various work places before she starts backing out orders. I am not as sad I felt earlier before lunch when my designs were rejected. If anything I feel renowned, with this weird feeling of looking towards something at the end of the day.

It might be the meeting with Namjoon later, and I don't care to deny it, because weirdly it gives me this channel, a sort of a light mind, to sketch out the things I have been thinking about.

It's not till later in the evening when half the office has left that I stop. Solar comes by to say she is leaving for her other job, and of course shamelessly asks me to get some dick. Hoseok informs that he will be staying longer in his office to finish up on some things, and wishes me good luck on my date.

Now it feels like I am waiting, for Namjoon to come pick me up like he had stated. I am not necessarily thrilled for this one, but I am not completely annoyed that I am having dinner with him either. Namjoon had been good company the previous night, his corny, somewhat perverted jokes had kept from staying in my head too long. Even longer when I went home that evening.

So yeah, I don't mind doing it again if it means a little break from myself. Does that qualify as using people? Am I a bad person for doing this?

It makes me wonder what he thought about yesterday, not that there was anything of significance, to think about. It's just...what really is he doing this for? He clearly didn't like me from the word go, so why does he want to go out again. I am curious about that, about a lot of things regarding him actually.

By the time I get over my unanswered questions, twenty minutes has passed already, so I clear up and leave the building. My supposed date is still not around as I expect, so with a sigh I cross over to the other side of the street to the building under construction to look for him.

"You can't be here sir." A voice shouts at me from what I assume is the entrance, making me stop in my tracks. A young lady stands with a clipboard by her side, hair tucked neatly in a bun, her safety gear still strapped to her. I apologize to her, stepping back to wait on the seemingly safe area.

I don't want to intrude if Namjoon is still at work, it might be rude and a little desperate to do so just for a small dinner. I don't even know why I resolved to look for him to begin with. I can just go home and tell him I waited for him but he didn't show up. Except I am not a pretender, or one to go back on my word.

I wait on the safe area, huddling closer in my coat in the gradually cold evening wind. I sit cross legged on the grass, eyes staring at the building ahead. It is almost finished from what I can see, the couple of storeys high of concrete, almost done with. I wonder what happens to the workers when actual completion is achieved.

Namjoon for example, will he just get another job? Another construction job somewhere else? Or Is it like a contract where they have a number of other constructions sites lined up. If that is the case, will he move to another place. Wait...what did I even care?

I shake my head from my troubling thoughts just in time to see a few guys strolling out of the building. My eyes rake the small crowds of workers passing, spotting Namjoon and Jackson exiting last. Namjoon looks at his watch, muttering something to Jackson before he looks opposite. He seems, worried; I would say so if I knew him.

I wait as his eyes hover around my office building, then the parking,  before they finally land on me by the grass. Like I said, there is just something about his eyes, knowing, yet questioning at the same time. There is always a need for me to hold my breath around him, like the moment I truly look into his eyes he will spill every thought of mine. It always makes me look away, which in turn makes me seem like a blushing little girl. But I have another feeling he knows I am not shy either. It is complicated.

He is complicated.

They separate with Jackson, before he hurries to me, his bulging muscles on display as he levels with my height. "Shit, am sorry Seokjin, I didn't think we would end this late." He says immediately as squats in front of me. His face inching closer to mine. But damn, is he actually apologizing, he looks like a cute puppy with those wide eyes, it is different from how he is when he bullies me around all the time. I don't think it would be bad to take advantage of this little opportunity to see more his sorry face.

"You made me wait."

"I know, and I am sorry, really. Something came up last minute. I understand if you don't want to get dinner now." He says surprising me, this is my chance to go home, I don't even care if he looks unusually vulnerable now. I should take this pass and get over with it. But those eyes, damn those eyes of his. He stares at me waiting, the negative answer that I wanted to give stuck at my throat.

"I don't go back at my word. And besides, if I don't pay now you will only blackmail me tomorrow."

"I am not forcing you to this, and it's not payment either." He suddenly says. I have never seen his expression switch that first, eyes hard, borderline angry. Why would he get angry over my true statement. What does he think he has been doing with all that bullying. "If you don't remember, you didn't exactly give me a choice to this, and I am paying for tonight right?"

His eyes of his hold mine a bit longer, lip buried between his teeth in slight thought. He nods, seemingly more to himself than to what I just said. "If that's what you think of it then don't go." I don't get it, what did he expect me to think, or make of all this. He harasses me, then what? denies and gets mad over it? "I am not allowing you another chance to use the you owe me a favour card on me again. You dragged me out yesterday then paid, and now you want to cancel only to drag me tomorrow?"

He stands up at my sentence and I follow him up, not allowing him a moment to intimidate me further. His jaw is a bit clenched, eyes still hard. "You must really think you did me a favour huh?..." He pauses. I am curious as to where he is going with this. I honestly don't even know why I am here. I should have said fuck it and just walked out of here already, or out of all this. It wasn't normal that I had taken the payback quite literally, setting myself up for sabotage by agreeing to go out to dinner with him again, and that I was arguing about it now with him. Even I confuse myself by how first I am switching up with my feelings. One moment I like him around me, how he makes think of nothing else other than him, and the next I feel like he is the rough guy next block, forcing me out on dates with him.

"I am sorry I 'dragged' you out yesterday, it won't happen again, consider the favour done too. You don't 'owe' me anymore." He says with intended air claws, leaving the grass already. I am left rooted for a second as he walks out, and eventually to the street. I follow after a bit, infuriated, what was all that about?

"What is your problem?"

"What do you think?" He retorts immediately turning around. It's turning dark already, and the street light under us is particularly not working. I can't really see the expressions on his face, but his voice sounds clear, clearly agitated. "What do you mean what do I think, you blackmailed me into this and now you want to act all offended?"

"You think I do it to annoy you? You think I do all this to for my satisfaction?" He says rather loudly, nostrils flaring while he points at himself. I don't get why he is so angry, I simply stated that I was paying him for what he asked, and now he wants to act all offended. What else was he expecting. It's been well over a months since he started all this. I don't have time for this anymore. "Yes, Namjoon, why else would you want to do this?"

He opens his mouth like he is going to reply, then closes back up with an audible breath. He absentmindedly licks his lips, a deafening silence taking over him, us. "Go home Jin. It's getting late." He finally says after an intense stare down. I don't usually curse out loudly, but today I have the urge to ask him what the actual fuck? I opened my mouth to do just that when a whistle comes up behind me.

"Ooouuu, if he can't treat you well baby, I can." A group of rowdy looking hooligans come up behind me and Namjoon. The leader, I assume, visibly eyes my up and down, licking his lips lustfully before whistling again, and exchanging looks with his other minions. It's sickening, but quite frankly nothing new. I get cat called everyday, it's normal life for me, although that doesn't stop me from clutching onto my sling back and backing up, and into Namjoon's chest.

"Come on, beautiful, you roll with me and I'll show you a good time. What do you say, ditch this asshole for better?" He laughs with the group. I feel Namjoon tense behind me, he grabs at my arm bringing me aside then behind him in a protective stance. "Get lost. All of you." Namjoon says to the group of four, who only cackle, the leader taking a step forward challengingly. "Or what?" He asks with a smirk.

I don't feel good about this, I have seen a lot in this eight months, and I know better than a street fight. Solar and Hoseok have warned me against them, so I tug at Namjoon's jacket to stop him. "Let's just go Namjoon, this not worth it." He might be a conceited pervert, but that doesn't mean I want something bad to happen to him.

"Let's just go."

"Yeah, listen to your bitch. Just go before I-" The leader doesn't get to finish his sentence as Namjoon swings back a large fist into his face, a satisfying yet painful break of bones sounding clear as the fist collides with his nose. The guy stumbles back into his group of boys, obviously not expecting any of it. Shit, I wasn't expecting that.

The leader swings back at Namjoon, who swiftly dodges, before Namjoon throwing another on his face. Defeated, he beckons for the other boys, to join in, four of them spamming Namjoon immediately in an unfair setting.

It's what happens in a street fight, people like this look for anything to take their anger and rage on, and they provoke whoever they can just so they could get a reaction.
I am not physically fit to be in a fight, let alone have the skills to do so, and for a moment I stay back watching in fear as Namjoon and the guys get into a heated scuffle, my voice is stuck in my throat, and my feet are seemingly rooted.

Namjoon looks to be tough as he throws fist after fist in every direction, but seems overpowered eventually when coordinating among the four becomes a problem. He is battered and bruised as he bends over facing me, mouth bloody, and face scrunched up in pain. He mouths something to me, something I can't decipher as a painful groan leaves his mouth the very next second.

It's funny how this happens in the early evening, darkness has only fallen, and people are still about their business freely. But they all flee at the sight. I know I would too, it's how it is. 

"Go." Namjoon breathes as his eyes meet mine, I am too horrified to even move, watching as one guy grabs Namjoon in a tight lock, before another one, throws a punch at his guts. I can't possibly leave him, this idiots won't stop until they completely injure him. So I take out my phone to call authorities, or at least scare the boys away the only way I can.

I make eye contact with the one of them standing by the side. His hand hovering over his hood pocket hesitantly. His eyebrows are furrowed in something as I raise the phone to my ears, eyes going hard all over sudden. It happens in slow motion, and I don't get to react quick enough as he pulls out a pocket knife, lodges himself between the fighting boys and rigs it to Namjoon's side before pulling it out.

"Shit."

"What the fuck dude, why did you stab him?"

"That bitch was calling the cops." He shouts to the others pointing at me. They scatter, leaving me in the cold night with Namjoon, a stabbed Namjoon, who falls to the side walk with a groan.

The next seconds are blurry, I shake uncontrollably as I call for help, hazed at the sight of blood, and a pale Namjoon.