Forgetting, should be a gift.

I was too late - I never regretted anything as much as this decision.
The two-hour drive, the previous experience, everything had stolen my time and I was now standing here in front of Sasaki and Iguchi, who were looking at me with questioning looks. Whether they would, could, should - probably wanted to hear anything from me.

»Excuse me, did you perhaps make a mistake in the door?«, again this question, even the first time it hurt to hear it. I swallowed the lump in my throat. A forced smile with thin lips and clenched hands.
»Yes sorry, I was totally wrong. Sorry to bother you have a nice evening«, I bowed deeply, turned and disappeared. So Gojo had already been here - shit. Tears again although I wasn't the type to cry that much at all.
»Could have really gone better today...«, hanging my head and pressing my lips together, I made my way back.

The courtyard showed itself to me just as silent as it had been in the morning. I ran my hands through my hair and made my way back to the room, glad not to run into anyone. At the same time I would like nothing better than to escape - to execute my own death sentence immediately by doing so.

»What a shitty day!«, I hissed into the darkness of my dorm room and then I turned on the light. Of course, my teacher didn't comply, with my request that I had specifically given to Yaga. Everyone was gathered, even Nanami was at the start when my gaze finally recognized the white-silver hair, a wave of anger rose in me. Of course he couldn't know and actually it was unfair to him but it was pure hatred for him that I felt. With clenched hands I turned back around, used my curse power and disappeared. Left the others there, they could all be stolen from me for today for good.

Bitter sweetness crept up inside me again as if I were eating a fresh grapefruit with pink flesh. Before I even noticed where I landed again - had I suddenly become faster? I arrived already, without any further ado I ran directly into this oversized building, slamming all the sliding doors behind me. In the next moment I already opened closet doors, spread the futon that was for a monster and pulled the clothes from my body. I disappeared under the blanket - completely and curled up, I didn't want to see anything, feel anything.... Just be Yuuji Itadori again, the tiger of West Middle High. Remembering how I came by that name, I smiled, blinked several times to banish that telltale wetness for today once again, and then closed my eyes. I wondered if it was dangerous to be here. If they would find me? Even if they did, for once I put my money on the curses, it should be fine with me, I wanted my peace from them -

the jujuzists.

»Have you seen him or even found him?«, slowly even I was getting restless. No more traces of Yuuji were found, not even remnants of curse powers, nothing. His cell phone dead or turned off. Fuck and if now the King had the upper hand for good? That was bad, very very bad. I had to free Yuuji, I owed him that goddamn thing after he helped me and protected me. If only I was strong enough already, if only I could bind that fucking king of curses to my shadow already.
Fuck.

»Megumi stop eating your fingertips!«, Nobara hissed angrily at me, immediately I stopped, not without feeling my sore fingertips by now. »Nothing, he's untraceable«, I muttered quietly to myself and Nobara furrowed her eyebrows.
»Well... after what we learned from Yaga, no wonder either, isn't it? In my opinion, he's totally overreacting.... Dumbass«, she shrugged her shoulders in disinterest as usual, and yet I knew she cared; we never cared about Yuuji. True, had been a shitty day for him and then on his birthday too.... Judging by his reaction, he hadn't said goodbye to both...which was weird, because according to Yaga, he wanted to spend the whole day with Sasaki and Iguji...asking was out, they didn't know Yuuji now. So another dead end.
I have to train, I have to bind Sukuna - to me - somehow.

So many secrets. Each of us carries them inside, yet we could trust each other blindly, couldn't we?
Ridiculous. - Disgusting. - A lie.

»Yuuji-san«, wrong ending, I was sucked out of my dream. Felt the futon under me again now, and the blanket over me. Warm - so warm.
»Yuuji-san«, those little bells that rang out and said my name - which had the wrong ending.
»Uraume? Please go, leave me alone«, I whispered softly but my soul knew Them understood me without a second thought. Then the room lay there again - quiet only the sounds of nature - spring was coming, slowly but steadily.

After another few hours, nothing, no one. Only bustle outside the door of the room. Uraume spoke quiet but clear commands, everyone obeyed.
»Them?«, more question than statement, this little word left my lips. Then a dainty knock on the wooden sliding door already sounded.
»Yuuji-san? May I come in?«, the question was as absurd as their actions - just wrong.
»It is not my village, it is not my shrine. I am the intruder here. Why do you ask? You are free to do anything, even kill me«, was my long yet clear answer.
The sliding door slid aside.
»Like we're going to kill you Yuji-san. Are you trying to sic Sukuna on us?! What's wrong with you, that's not usually your style«, Uraume entered quietly, got back on his knees and closed the doors. I watched Them silently and finally snorted. Only to finally pull the blanket off my head and turn onto my back.
»Sure, Sukuna, the great Sukuna«, grumbling and dripping with sarcasm, I continued to speak.
»The good one has better things to do, too. While we're on the subject, tell me right now how to get rid of him without getting killed«, I turned my head in Them's direction, sighing, Uraume started moving again and now landed right next to the futon - and thus next to me, on its knees.
»A good question«, Them smiled slightly.
»Which only my brother can answer for you, though«, Sukuna was the brother?! The brother of Uraume?! So I didn't get any information or even help, after yesterday anything would have been fine. And if the curses, Sukuna would have had to cut out of me. I would have endured the agony, allowed them to destroy me with arms spread wide. As long as I could live after that.
I turned away, away from Uraume and snorted.
»Don't give me that, my plan was to kill Sukuna, don't make me like him now just because he's your brother«, I grumbled softly to myself. Them laughed They bell laugh.
»So you're even willing to sympathize with him after all?«, Them then suddenly questioned.
»You know how it was meant«, my heart was pounding up to my throat, what could I do, I had run off headless yesterday.
I had disappeared into the forest, into nothing, until I arrived back here. Unknowingly, this place suddenly attracted me like a magnet - what to make of it I didn't know. Outside buds began to develop but I myself lost one blossom after another - spring came slowly but steadily; whispered to me that I was dying.

»What should I do Uraume?«, it remained silent for minutes, minutes that felt like infinity.
»Well, that's your choice«, again I snorted, contorting my face into a grimace.
»Hardly. I've lost all right to my body and my life. Partly to Sukuna, partly to the sorcerer. I just don't know who owns the bigger share but I don't own myself anymore«, I whispered softly to myself and finally started to stand up. For the first time I spoke this fact, this one that revealed that I existed only to act according to the wishes of others and no longer according to mine.
»Uraume, may I be here.... be alone? Completely alone?«, Them also stood up, looked at me for a long time and bowed.
»You haven't changed a bit Yuji-san. Let me just tell you one thing, you'll get through this time too. I will put water in front of your room, don't forget that«, I nodded, knowing and not knowing what to expect. My emotional outburst, my raging - not his. Each time it felt like I was shattering into individual atoms and yet, more surprisingly, it was Him who was patching me back up. Them opened the sliding door, stepped out and we looked at each other one last time. Them's last order that everyone had to leave the shrine now, for at least three days. The servants scurried off, all work was stopped and several brought water bottles and placed them in the hallway. No one was allowed to enter this room except Them.
»I alone will be able to enter the shrine. I'll be back in three days«, I nodded mutely and then with a soft click the sliding door of the bedroom closed.

»It's already time Uraume?«, Them nodded, stood directly in front of the shrine and made hand signs, the veil that would protect the future master and the master.
»Takumi, Kenzo, go and strengthen the seal. No one must find and disturb the two. It is their time, the three days belong to our lord and master. You know the rules, the veil exists only I am allowed to see Yuuji-san«, Uraume dropped the veil and then Them gave us the last glass vials with our master's blood from that time. We disappeared and renewed the seal as requested.
The veil only prevented any intrusion of strangers, everything else that the master endured, the village also suffered. Yuuji-san often reacted emotionally, rarely thinking rationally, and that was what attracted us all to him. Yuuji-san was different from everyone else, he gave us a chance, loved his village, the curs who lived and lived there, each and every one. He loved Sukuna with every fiber of his being. Only until the soul accepted all that again, understood and until the two finally had enough quarreled, so many things happened.
Violence, death, and grief were the most evil dimensions of it. Hopefully Sukuna-sama was less stubborn this life and talked to his soul before it killed itself in every possible way.

Just as the phoenix burned to ashes and rose again - we also returned.

I began to meditate, time had now become irrelevant. I simply took it and sooner or later I would also return. But this was more important, more important than anything else. Uraume was right - somehow. I should use the smallest piece of life that belonged to me and this was it - my chance.
Hours passed but nothing happened, Sukuna didn't let me in and he didn't come for me either.
»Well, that was kind of obvious«, I muttered quietly to myself, dissatisfied. What made the King of curses finally speak to me. To not mock me, to finally give me the answers I was entitled to? Here and there I remembered things that were impossible to know but I didn't really get anything out of it. Uraume said something about me being like before. But was I really like that? Or was I just a cheap imitation of the original? Was I nothing more than a kind of copy? This thought took my breath away, I gasped for air and suffered the first panic attack in my life. That was the point at which Sukuna reacted.
»You haven't changed a bit. In every life, you think the same thing«, annoyed, the King spoke, no kind words - nothing of this. And I sat here on the bloody floor, unable to look up, unable to speak, unable to ask. His footsteps echoing, here inside me - inside him. The bones that lay scattered everywhere and the power he now used to prove to me that he was the stronger one.
»If you're hoping for sympathy, you've come to the wrong place«, still staring at the bloody water in front of me, not lifting my face.
»I want to get out of here, let me go, right now«, a sigh, a snap and then my surroundings were back to normal. All the while I wanted to finally get to him, to know what I had to do to stop dying. But, all I could think about was that I wasn't really me. How could everyone say that my soul had not changed? How could everyone say that I, Yuuji, hadn't changed? As if I were still that person from a thousand years ago. Never. I couldn't possibly be the same, I couldn't possibly accept all of this no matter what exactly it was. I couldn't stay here with the curses, I had become a jujuzist, hadn't I? My life was gambled away with the highest stakes there were on this goddamn planet. So I accepted this state, somehow tried to direct my thoughts. Straight ahead and not back, one step forward and not three back; the here and now. I braced myself and decided to go the way that was right. I had to ask Sukuna the most important question - now.
»I know you can be separated from me, so tell me fucking how«, caustic, like acid spat in someone's face I asked him.
»Find my fingers and I'll tell you«, an answer, after all. But if I had them all, then it was execution.
»The formula«, I hissed further. »They will not separate us, because as soon as that happens, I will be indestructible again. It's either the two of us or no one at all«, so either way it was my end? Even if they knew I could be separated from him, wouldn't they do it? So he would die for good?
»Right kid. Because they want me, and the only way they're going to get that is by me continuing to live inside you. They don't care if you die in the process, they wouldn't even consider freeing you from me. You'd be collateral damage in their eyes«, Sukuna didn't laugh, didn't mock, rather sounded just as caustic as I did before.
»And another solution?«, but he remained silent, gave no answer to that and yet it was one and painfully I realized what that meant. My life would be saved, but Sukuna would be stuck in a pact he would never enter into willingly. They would force him, which meant the jujuzists found something powerful from him and he already knew what it was.

»What is it?«, but nothing.
»What did they take from you?«,
»Not from me.«

And that's when I understood.

His return, which would never have gone unnoticed - the holy grail in the world of jujutsu, Sukuna's heart. The indestructible one that would be demoted to a weapon of the jujuzists; because they wanted it. His almost endless power, his invincibility.

»Then show me who I really am! Why do I remember Them, why Takumi and Kenzo? Why the fuck do I remember you?!«, I clenched my hands into fists, waiting for the explanations, the facts that would prove to me why I felt, acted and thought so inconsistently. The palpitations that all at once increased uncleanly and I plunged again from above into my and his insides. »So you want to know what the bastards are really up to?! Don't hold me responsible for their decisions though!«, with the next blink, we saw me go down again and again. Biting the dust over and over again, being killed, tortured and finally murdered. I shook my head, this was impossible, why was he showing me this? »I should never have believed you, that's a lie. How would you even know, no, like I was reborn all the time, never«, he clicked his tongue and turned away. »Unlike you, I am no longer human, unlike you, I can see what is hidden from you worms. Unlike you, I can see your soul, I can see what it has already suffered, I can see how great your pain really is that you carry within you«, again I sat in the bloody water, humiliated this time by Sukuna, not by the humans. Not by Fushiguro or Kugisaki - not by the magic masters. »I... don't believe a word you say«, I hissed angrily at him in response, jutting my chin up and trying to stop him. But it was doomed to fail from the start. He raised a hand and snapped it, the inside began to shake. »Are you trying to kill me! Damn it, I'm not going through this again!«, now I was standing behind him, getting ready to fight him again. »Don't be ridiculous«, just a quick glance over his shoulder then he ran over the blood away from me. One hand raised, signaling with his finger for me to follow. Reluctantly, I did, keeping a safe distance. »Here«, he stopped and looked ahead, as I stood behind him it remained partly hidden from me. But I still didn't dare take another step. Sukuna stopped moving and yet he suddenly disappeared. »Since you don't believe me«, I stood meters away from that root, a root that was engulfed but glowing from within, sheerly radiant. »Then experience it again«, with the next opening of my eyelids, the king of curses pressed me against this root. I defended myself, but it came to nothing, like pretty much everything else. Locked between these roots and his body, he destroyed the one in front of me and exposed the ray. I somehow braced myself, got scared, scared that he would destroy this. I didn't care about this moment but this, must not be destroyed. »Stop it!«, panicking, I began to move against him. Tried through my body to push him away, push away something. »Stop it! This is none of your business! It's mine, mine alone!«, with a twist I slapped Sukuna. Turning his head to the side, he blinked several times and directed his gaze back down at me. »Tzz stupid brat, you're getting on my nerves«, it rumbled dangerously from his chest. He reared up in front of me and I leaned backwards. »If you throw me into the abyss, I'll take you with me«, between clenched teeth I stared steadfastly at his chest. "I've been through hell more times than you.", with that sentence Sukuna again pierced my torso with his hand. I grabbed his arm, coughing up blood, splattering his kimono and face with it. Smiling arrogantly, I looked up at him. »I told you, this time I'll drag you down with me«, and with that, just like he did before, I pierced his torso with my hand. His blood speckled my face. »Go to hell, Curse King«, then it went black and I fell; again.

Two a part of the whole - hate and love balanced on the scales of justice. As you were once my king, I was yours.