Leo trudged through the first snow of the season. Luckily it wasn't enough to require shoveling. The car only needed a swish of the brush on the windows and the wipers did the rest. He drove to the station to see if the roads were slippery before turning the car over to Isla.

"We had snow in Philly, you know."

He smiled at the memory of her comment. She had changed from the meek woman he met at the diner. When the temperatures dropped, he feared seeing her old bulky sweaters, but they hadn't returned. As much as he could think about Isla all day, it wouldn't help him accomplish his goals. They had dug a permanent line that neither crossed. Welcome to the friend zone.

Leo forced himself to focus on his number one task: to shop for a publisher for a new author who could become a star in the young adult market. His gut told him both daughters and their mothers would one day read her books. The prospect of finding another best seller excited him. Thankfully, he loved his career because personally, his future looked written as the dad of children who wouldn't stop growing, and a man in love with a woman in a glass box. He could look but not touch her.

As he settled at his desk, Lilli appeared. She strolled in wearing her ridiculous heels.

He opened his mouth. "I doubt Isla could walk in those."

Lilli chuckled. "I've had years of practice. I enjoy watching Zach squirm at work."

At home, Isla unknowingly made him squirm. "At least Zach gets to take them off you at home."

"Hello. Have we met? I don't wear heels while commuting. Today I had to break out my boots." She paused a moment before waving her finger at him. "You want Isla in heels so you can take them off her."

"No, I don't." His denial was immediate.

Lilli chuckled. "What are you buying her for Christmas?"

"It's not even Thanksgiving."

"Tell that to the retailers."

"She's the nanny."

Lilli fake sneezed. "Bull shi choo!"

"Fine. What does one get for the nanny who doubles as a friend?"

"Friend? Is that the word you are going with?"

"Lilli, you know how devout she is. I'm divorced, so I'm not a choice."

"But you wish you were?" Lilli jumped in her seat, like Riley at her fifth birthday. Clapping, she said, "I knew it."

Leo shook his head. "Your excitement is unfounded. Seriously, I'm working hard to enjoy being just friends. Don't meddle. Isla doesn't need the pressure."

"Fine. I get it. You still need to buy her a thoughtful gift."

"I was thinking about those Instapots in every store ad." Lilli covered her face with her palm. "An air fryer? She doesn't like unhealthy food."

"Seriously, no wonder you're divorced. Do you have a romantic bone in your body?"

"We aren't romantic friends. For the record, I know how to be romantic." Autumn never had any complaints.

"I'm thinking of jewelry or maybe my perfume. She said it was nice."

"No offense, but I don't want my house to smell like you. It's Zach's pheromone inducer, not mine."

"You're no fun."

Leo sighed. The gift dilemma had already weighed him down. "I have work to do." He picked up his phone. "Did you want to say hi to Kendall?"

"I'm leaving." The girl could move fast in her heels.

When Leo finally listened to his rumbling stomach, he had placed calls to most of his publishing contacts. Kendall might as well have told him to go suck an egg. Thankfully, a few others were interested enough to take a look.

"Chelsea! I need food." No response.

He stood and stretched. Most of the morning, he had spent pacing with his phone headset on. Leo ventured out to find Chelsea's office empty, so he went over to Zach's. His friend turned from his screen. He took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"How goes it?"

Leo shrugged. "It's going. You?"

"I'm trying to decide if I like this manuscript enough."

Leo chuckled. "If you have to talk yourself into it, I say pass."

"You're right. I want to. The summary intrigued me, but the execution fell short."

Leo nodded. He had felt that way before. "Have you had lunch?"

Zach nodded. "Lilli brought leftovers. You should bring some from home."

"Maybe. If we have any. I'll order a delivery."

Zach smiled and pointed behind him. "I have Lilli's binder."

Leo laughed. She had compiled local takeout menus. "No, but thanks."

A local sandwich shop delivered. He considered a meatball, but went healthier with turkey. Back at his desk, he had neglected his email all morning.

When his phone rang, he expected it to be Claudia, the receptionist, telling him his sandwich had arrived. It was Chelsea; Percy was on the line.

"Put him through and look out for my lunch." She transferred the call. "Hey, Percy. Is this business? Last I heard from Matthew, he was happy with the screenplay."

"You never look at your damn phone at work."

He used it to order lunch. "What's up?"

"Autumn has an infection."

"A tube?" She had minor infections at the site of her tubes.

"No, an unknown source. It's serious."

"Serious?" His heart dropped. He wasn't her husband, but his heart forgot. "Is she on antibiotics?"

"My mother insisted. Even my father tried to talk her out of it. Leo, I'm not sure it will matter."

In front of Leo, Chelsea put his sandwich on his desk. He said, "Thanks. Shut my door." Taking a deep breath, he asked, "What are the doctor's saying?"

"It'll be hard for her to fight a full-blown infection."

Leo had wanted to let her die and had even prayed for it, but to have the possibility looming in front of him he felt raw, like the accident had just happened.

"Should. Should I come?"

Percy's voice went high like a pubescent boy. "To what? Say goodbye to a body? Maybe she'll finally be someplace."

"Heaven?"

"If there's such a thing." Percy rebelled against his mother's religion too.

"If. If she. I want to be at her funeral."

"My mother will expect the kids."

"God, my kids. I was selfishly thinking of myself. I don't know how they'll take it."

Cody didn't remember her, but Riley did. Cody loved Isla like a mother. Isla. He squashed any thoughts of what it would mean for Isla. He couldn't go forward, because the past had taken over.

"I'll keep in touch. Christ, my mother wants me to sit there while she prays over my sister who should have died years ago." Percy hung up.

Leo looked at the brown bag on his desk. He didn't feel hungry. He looked at his email inbox and none of it felt important. When he met with the doctors to discuss disconnecting her breathing tubes, he had still been in the pits of grief. As time passed, he mourned and worked through the grieving process. Moving had been an enormous step towards moving on. As his screen became blurry, it felt like not a day had passed. Shaking his head, he had always expected to feel relief. He scrubbed his hands over his face and lodged them into his hair and tugged needing to feel something.

Conflicting thoughts swirled as anger peaked. What if her mother saved her again? Autumn deserved to be at rest as final as it would be for those who loved her. The limbo had always been confusing for the kids, but Leo worried about the finality. Looking at the time he could leave and be home before they came home from school. He straightened his desk, but he froze. What would he tell them? He had jumped to a conclusion that wasn't definitive.

He jerked when his phone rang. Chelsea's bubbly voice announced his contact at Little Brown Publishing was on hold. He accepted the call, but couldn't smile when he announced he was very interested in looking at the manuscript Leo had pitched. It was a great fit; they were the publishers of best sellers including the Twilight Series. The Leo who stepped into his office at the start of the day would have been happy with the amount of interest he generated, but the gloom hanging over him prevented it.

"She's not gone, and it was what you've been wishing for." His own words didn't help.

With his hand on the receiver, he wanted to hear Isla's calm voice. Unfortunately, he waited too long; she was busy with the kids. Riley had lots of homework in sixth grade. Ilsa had her work on it in the afternoon. Leo appreciated her efforts. Isla had saved him in so many ways, but he didn't want to get her hopes up. She prayed for Autumn's passing, but his wife could recover.

He heard voices at Chelsea's desk. His assistant said, "He's been hiding in there all day."

Leo picked up the brown bag and took out his sandwich. Just as he forced a bite, he saw the mayo and threw it in the trash. He looked at the time on his computer. If he packed up, he could catch the train at quarter to five. He zippered his coat and flung his loaded messenger bag over his shoulder.

When Leo opened his door Zach and Chelsea turned to face him. He pointed to the chocolate in Zach's hand. "If that's for Lilli she has a wedding dress to fit into."

Zach chuckled. "We'll find a way to work it off. Leaving early?"

"Yeah. Um. I need to get home."

Zach stepped towards him. "Are the kids okay?"

"Yeah. I want to catch my train. Good night."

Chelsea shook her head, but turned her attention to Zach. "Lilli doesn't exercise."

Leo didn't hear Zach's response. His friend had meant a different workout, but Lilli used the treadmill at the fitness room in their building. She enjoyed ogling Zach.

Once on the train, he texted Isla and put his head back. He needed to hug his kids but didn't want them to know their mother was sick until he had more information.

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