Written on November 4th, 2018

C H A P T E R 2

Upset, Tara stomps up the stairs to her modest bedroom. Unfriendly words leaving her mouth while she rants to herself. While Tara has a rather short fuse and can clash well with her mother, she has never experienced the amount of anger she is feeling so intensely as she is now.

Once in her room, she slams the door shut with great force. This causes hellish screams from downstairs and glass shattering. Tara clenches her jaw tightly to prevent herself from continuing to say insults in Spanish. The swallowed comments and screams from all levels in the house do not stop Tara from grabbing a spacious and sturdy backpack from the closet and throwing it on her bed. It even encourages her to continue with this plan.

Even though Tara's vision is obscured by burning tears in her eyes, she digs through her closet to find her favorite items of clothing. When the bag is overflowing with jeans, sweaters, shirts and underwear, Tara zips it closed. Knowing that she needs more than clothes to survive, or start over somewhere, she packs a second bag.

She fills her army green shoulder bag, which technically belongs to Mateo, with what she believes are important necessities; a toothbrush with toothpaste, a towel, a brush with some elastic bands, the pill and other medicines such as painkillers, an all-in-1 shampoo for the shower, her ID and debit card. Finally, she packs her mobile phone with charger and power bank.

Feeling so emotionally overwhelmed, Tara doesn't have to think twice about how good this plan really is in reality. What happened today was the final straw. Tara never thought, or could have imagined, that her parents would deal this way with what has happened over the past six months.

THe thought of her brother, her parents and the incomprehension of Tara's feelings and behavior really makes the tears flow. The room is filled with pained cries of frustration. Tara slowly drops to her knees and collapses helplessly on the floor.

* * *

'Tara?' a soft girl's voice sounds, followed by the sound of light footsteps walking into the dark room. Upon hearing Paloma, Tara jumps to her feet. She immediately dries her tears and tries to wipe away her smeared mascara with her sleeve as best she can.

'Yes?' she answers with a slightly shaking voice. 'What is it, Loom?' Knowing that her sister can see her, Tara holds out her arms. Less than a second later, that space is filled with a petite nine-year-old body. 'Are you still angry?' Paloma asks carefully, positioning herself so that she is sitting on her older sister's lap and can look her straight in the eye.

Tara shakes her head. 'Don't worry,' she whispers back. 'I won't shout like that again. I'm sorry I did that in front of you.' Genuinely ashamed of the behavior Tara has displayed in the presence of her younger sister and brother, she hangs her head slightly.

The two Délgado sisters remain seated like this for a few minutes; enjoying each other's company. Then Tara gently and extremely gently pushes Paloma off of her. She gets up and turns on the light in her room. Hours have passed since Tara's mental and physical collapse, and night has already fallen.

'Loom, you know that I love you very much? And Lucio, of course,' Tara asks her sister as she takes her hand and squats down to be face level with Paloma. She strokes a piece of Paloma's hair behind her ear and smiles at her with sad eyes. Paloma nods. 'I love you too, Tara.'

All Tara does is nod as a response to Paloma's answer. 'Promise me you'll take good care of Lucio.' Paloma looks at her older sister, not understanding what she means. 'What about you?' Paloma's eyes widen and she tilts her head slightly to the side. Now Tara shakes her head. 'I can't be here anymore, Loom. I just can't do it anymore,' she explains.

Tara knows that telling some fairy tale or a little lie is of no use to her sister; honesty is the best policy. Plus, Paloma is old – and wise – enough to understand what's going on and the reasons behind Tara's choices.

A big kiss is planted on Paloma's forehead after which nine-year-old Tara pulls into a tight hug. 'I'm going to miss you,' she mumbles. 'I will miss you too, but I'll be back. Someday,' Tara adds, but it is so soft that Paloma can't hear it.

* * *

With the two well-filled bags on her bed, her black hair now tied in a high ponytail, Tara looks sadly around the bedroom. She's sitting down on the ground, leaning against her mirror cabinet. Tara closes her eyes for a few moments and drops her head into her hands.

She said goodbye to her beloved sister. Tara then sneaked into her baby brother's bedroom to give him a goodbye kiss. She considered leaving a letter for her parents, but ultimately decided that such a thing was not necessary. Not after all the things that have happened.

Tara bends over and ties the laces of her sneakers. Once she has put on her thin autumn coat over her canary yellow sweater, she throws her backpack over her back. She hangs the shoulderbag diagonally over her chest.

With a deep sigh, composed of the nerves of actually walking away and the sadness of leaving Paloma and Lucio behind, Tara takes a last look at the photo frame she has on her desk: Her, together with a broadly grinning Mateo on her fifteenth birthday, both covered in the remains of cream cake.

When she sees this photo, Tara musters up the last bit of courage she needs and walks towards her window frame with sure steps. She slides it open, making sure it doesn't make too much noise: She prefers to let the household sleep and leave as unnoticed as possible.

Tara has no trouble climbing out of the window and going down the water pipe. Except for the little vision she has; the poorly lit street does pose a disadvantage to a smooth landing.

As soon as she has her feet firmly on the ground, Tara begins her journey. Her first idea is to go to the bus stop two blocks away. This way she can take the night bus to the train station and once there she will figure the rest out.