This is my take on writing a novel which does not center on Romance. I know some of you feel slightly off that there are not a lot of romantic moments like what you expected, but thank you so much for reading. I hope you learn a lot of lessons through Clementine/Lia's story.

Epilogue

It hurt so much to let go.

Some people think that holding on is what makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go. It's hard and painful.

It was hard for me, especially because I wasn't able to say the things I wanted to say. There was no closure. I was in deep regret. I wanted say 'good bye,' 'I'm sorry,' and 'thank you,' but death was so vile that it didn't give me a chance to do those things.

We could've done more things together and make up for the lost years if she was given more time. I could've been a better sister to her. I had so much hope for the both of us, but it was all burnt down by the fires of death.

Time is cruel like life and death.

After I learned about Arlene's death from Kalcifer, I was still in denial. I tried to turn away from the truth. I knew how painful the truth was that I refused to accept it. However, when I saw her casket right in front of me, I was forced to open my eyes to the reality that she was already gone forever.

I did not cry, though. I already cried enough tears that I didn't shed a single tear. I was just staring blankly at her, resting in peace.

My father had it bad, though.

Our father...

After attending to some important matters that he had to fix and depriving himself from mourning, he just broke down completely. Even my mother could hardly get through him. He was almost unresponsive. He just stayed in the funeral home the whole time. He never left Arlene's side.

"I wish I was a better father to her..." My father cried, and that broke my heart. "How I wish I could turn back time and protect her at that moment..."

When I saw him miserable and regretful, I realized that my father really loved Arlene.

I learned that he and Arlene weren't really in good terms while I was gone. Arlene was a little distant to him, so they didn't get along that much.

Drizelda, on the other hand, was given a chance to attend the last day of her daughter's wake before she was locked behind the bars. She kept on apologizing in front of her lifeless daughter. She knew she died in her hands. Unexpectedly, she acknowledged and admitted her mistakes and surrendered herself to the police after she was discharged from the hospital. She was going to face multiple charges of murder, assault, and kidnapping, probably spending the rest of her life inside the jail.

She could have been a great mother, if only her love didn't turn into madness. This was the result of her greediness. Instead of gaining more, she lost more than what she had―she lost her daughter.

I sympathized with their grief. I was so familiar with it. They lost their daughter, while I lost my sister. I almost lost myself, too.

My mother introduced me to a professional Psychiatrist to help me overcome my trauma and depression, weeks after Arlene's funeral. While I was studying, I also focused on my mental and emotional development. I was religiously taking meds and attending treatments. Also, Kalcifer took me to a shooting range once in a while. He thought me how to hold the gun and shoot as a part of my treatment. Eventually, I got used to it.

Every step of the way, Kalcifer was there with me. When he said he would never take his eyes off me, he meant it. My parents and his presence made it all bearable for me.

He didn't tell me to quickly move on from the past. He didn't rush me. He was so patient with me. He told me that it was okay to dwell on the pain. He made realize that it was okay to just take my time and let my heart heal on its own―let it rest―instead of forcing it.

Kalcifer showed me how much better I could be, after healing from the pain.

"Baby, wake up now..."

I felt someone lightly pinching my cheek.

Still feeling a bit sleepy, I opened my eyes and saw that we already arrived at the apartment where Kalcifer used to stay here in San Isidro. Apprarently, he already bought the property from the owner, so that every time we wanted to go back here for a vacation, we would have a place to stay.

Noong una ay nag-aalangan pa ako dahil puwede naman kaming tumira kina Nanay Marissa, but he insisted. Wala na rin akong nagawa at hinayaan na siya sa gustong mangyari.

I yawned, then pouted my lips, wanting to sleep more. Our flight earlier was at 5AM in the morning. I didn't get enough sleep because my graduation party ended up past midnight. Tumulong pa ako kahit papaano sa pagliligpit hanggang sa pinagalitan na ako ni Ate Sally. Kalcifer had to forcefully drag me to my room. Hindi na rin ako nagpumilit pa dahil nga maaga pa ang alis namin.

I had no idea how Kalcifer still managed to stay awake. Siya pa mismo ang nagmaneho ng sasakyan papunta rito sa San Isidro pagkababa namin sa eroplano.

"Such a sleepyhead." He chuckled huskily.

Frowning, I turned to him, and he still had that teasing look on his face.

At first, he was having a hard time showing his affection to me. His movements were a bit stiff, like he had never done something like that before. He wasn't also very vocal, up to now. But since he became accustomed to it, he was already able to show affection naturally than before. Though, sometimes I would still find him cold and rigid, especially when he's serious.

"You better freshen up now," he told me as he turned the engine off and pulled out the key from the ignition. "Nanay Marissa called me earlier, while you were asleep. Ang sabi ko ay malapit na tayo. She's already expecting us."

Napabuntong hininga naman ako at inangat na ang aking upuan. Kalcifer pushed it down for me earlier to take a nap comfortably.

Nauna na si Kalcifer bumaba ng sasakyan. Inipit ko muna ang aking buhok na bago sumunod sa kanya. He carried our duffle bags from the backseat, while I opened the gates and entered the house.

Medyo nag-iba na ng ayos ang apartment, lalo na't mayroong tumira ditong ibang pamilya pagkatapos bumalik ni Kalcifer noon sa Maynila. It was a coincidence that the family who lived here moved out last, last month, when Kalcifer was planning to buy it.

Dumiretso ako sa kuwarto sa taas para makaligo ulit. I felt so sticky after the long trip. Binilisan ko ng ligo dahil baka hindi na makapaghintay si Nanay Marissa at siya na mismo ang lumuwas papunta rito. Pagkatapos ay nagbihis ako ng pantalon at tee shirt―my usual get up when I was still living here in San Isidro.

When I walked out the bathroom, Kalcifer was also done taking a shower. Siguro ay ginamit niya na ang banyo sa baba.

"You ready to go?" he asked me, while playing with the keys on his hand.

"Yup." I smiled and grabbed my hand bag on the top of the bed.

Kalcifer casually held my hand. Magkahawak kamay kami habang papalabas ng bahay. Walang oras kaming inaksaya dahil magtatanghali na. We promised that we'd be there by lunch. Inimbita rin ni Nanay Marissa sina Karla at Mikael para doon na kumain ng tanghalian.

This wasn't the first time we came back here after I went to Manila. Tuwing bakasyon ay umuuwi ako rito sandali, pero kailangan ko ring bumalik pagkatapos ng isang linggo dahil mayroon din akong alis kasama sina mommy at daddy. We traveled to different countries. Sometimes, Kalcifer would even come with us.

Ngayon, pinagbigyan ako nina mommy at daddy na magtagal dito ng isang buwan. It might be hard for me to go back after that, since I'd be very busy with the company. I have a lot of responsibilities waiting for me back in Manila.

Our house here in San Isidro was renovated into a bigger house last year. Mayroon na ito ngayong ikalawang palapag. Mayroon pa rin akong kuwarto rito. Ang mga ibang damit ko na naiwan ay nakatago pa rin.

Lydia was hired by mother to manage the commercial building here after she graduated last year. Mom said she was doing a great job. Hindi siya nagkamali na ialok kay Lydia ang trabahong 'yon. The building was in good hands with her supervision.

"Ayan na sila, Ate Lia!" Ang maligalig na si Freah ang sumalubong sa amin ni Kalcifer pagkarating sa bahay.

She was already a high school student. Tumangkad na rin siya at hanggang baba ko na. Her body also matured a bit, but she was still a bit childish. Ang sabi naman ni Lydia sa akin noon ay mayroon na raw crush itong si Freah. Though I wasn't sure if she was just teasing our little sister or she was really telling the truth.

Sunod-sunod na lumapit sa amin ni Kalcifer ang mga tao sa bahay. We were welcomed so warmly. Hindi rin nagtagal ang kumustahan upang hindi lumamig ang mga pagkain na niluto ni nanay. Nagpatuloy ang usapan habang kumakain kami.

It was a pleasant lunch with them. Halos hindi sila maubusan ng kuwento. Ganoon na rin ako.

After eating lunch, I proceeded to give my gifts. Sina Tatay Vito, Mikael at Kalcifer ay lumabas muna ng bahay para tingnan ang sasakyan na binili. Ang sabi ni Nanay Marissa ay walang sawa raw na pinagmamalaki iyon ni Tatay Vito sa kanyang mga kumpare.

"Kumusta na pala kayo ni Kalcifer, anak?" tanong ni nanay sa akin at hindi nakaligtas sa akin ang pagkinang ng kanyang mga mata. Para bang may inaasahan siyang madinig galing sa akin.

Nagtaas ng kilay si Lydia. "Oo nga, Lia. Matagal na kayo, ah."

"Ayos lang naman kaming dalawa..." nahihiya kong sagot.

"Wala pa ba kayong balak magpakasal?" sunod na tanong ni nanay.

Halos masamid ako dahil sa kanyang diretsahang tanong. Panicking, I shook my head. "Wala pa po," agap ko.

"Lia, hindi na bata si Kalcifer," sabat naman ni Karla habang kumakain ng brownies na uwi ko. "Kung ako sa'yo, ikaw na ang gumawa ng paraan. Magbigay ka na ng ideya!"

"Karla, huwag mo ngang igaya sa'yo ang kapatid ko." Pabiro siyang inirapan ni Lydia. "Alam mo namang hindi ganoon ang personalidad niyan. Dalagang Pilipina 'yan!"

Napanguso si Karla. She looked slightly offended, though I knew she wouldn't take that to heart.

I still couldn't forget when Karla told me that she and Mikael were in a relationship two years ago. And just last month, she told me they were already engaged. Sa pagkakaalam ko ay si Karla ang nag-open ng topic na 'yon kay Mikael. Eventually, they came up with a mutual decision that they were already engaged.

I was glad that Lydia finally moved on from Mikael. Ang akala ko ay magkakaroon pa sila ng hindi pagkakaunawaan ni Karla. But then, Lydia was cool with it. Sa pagkakaalam ko ay nililigawan siya ng anak na lalaki ni Mayor Alban na sa Ibayo nag-aral at noong nakaraang taon lamang bumalik dito sa San Isidro. Pero ang sabi ni Lydia sa akin ay wala pa sa isip niya ang pumasok sa relasyon. She reasoned out that she was focused on managing the commercial building.

Tuloy-tuloy ang kuwentuhan namin hanggang sa lumubog na ang araw. Doon na rin kami kumain ni Kalcifer ng hapunan bago nagdesisyong magpaalam. Sabay na rin umuwi sa amin sina Mikael at Karla.

Ngayong gabi ay roon muna ako bahay na binili ni Kalcifer magpapalipas ng gabi. Tomorrow, I would start to live with the Hernandez. Ang napagdesisyunan namin ni Kalcifer ay roon ako titira sa Hernandez sa bakasyon na ito, basta sa kanya ako uuwi tuwing Sabado at Linggo.

"Where are we going?" I asked Kalcifer when the car turned to a different road, going out of San Isidro.

He glanced at me and mysteriously smiled. "You'll see."

Napakunot na lamang ang noo ko. Halos isang oras na rin kaming bumabiyahe nang biglang niliko ni Kalcifer ang sasakyan sa pamilyar na lugar.

Ahead of us, I saw the vast view of the Pacific Ocean. Though we'd return to San Isidro for a few times, we never thought of visiting this place. This was the first time we were going back here after that night.

As soon as I got off the car, I smelled the scent of the calming ocean breeze. It made me feel so nostalgic. The memories flashed back before my eyes. This was the place where I admitted to myself that I was falling for Kalcifer. The place where I embraced my true identity, after years of avoiding it.

Now, I was back and free from the chains of the past. I could now look back on everything without any fear and pain.

Walang salitang hinawakan ni Kalcifer ang aking kamay. Sa kabilang kamay niya ay mayroon na siyang handang jacket. Maingat niya akong inalalayan pababa sa mga bato kung saan kami naupo noon.

"Be careful," he told me as I took a step and sat on the rock.

Pagkaupo ko ay agad niya sa aking ibinigay ang jacket bago naupo sa aking tabi. I let my head rest on his shoulder, while looking at the wide horizon. The faint sound of the crashing waves brought tranquility to this moment.

"Remember that night?" Kalcifer suddenly asked me.

Nodding my head, I smiled and looked up to the stars. "You were still Alastair before."

"And you were Linette Afia."

I chuckled a bit, and Kalcifer held my hand, sitting on my lap. Trying to find constellations I was familiar with, I remained staring at the starry night sky.

"I tried to recall which place was the most memorable for the both of us here in San Isidro," he said. "This place came to my mind immediately. It's like our secret place, though it's open to the public."

Humigpit ang kanyang pagkakahawak sa aking kamay. Inayos ko ang aking ulo sa kanyang balikat.

"I want to create a new memory here, but this time as Clementine and Kalcifer," he told me. "This time it's going to be truer than true."

I slightly frowned, realizing that he was suddenly being so emotional and sentimental. I lifted my head and turned to him. My forehead creased when I saw him looking a bit uneasy.

"Kalcifer―"

"Would you like to create more memories with me in this lifetime?" Kalcifer cut me off with a question which caught me off-guard. He just said that out of the blue.

"W-what do you mean?" I asked, my heart pounding so crazy.

Slowly, he turned to me. I was so focused on his eyes but the next thing I knew, I was already staring at a ring.

My lips parted, speechless.

"Clementine, are you willing to spend the rest of your life being my wife?"

Tears welled up in my eyes, as soon as he dropped the question. My heart was so overwhelmed by the love and happiness that I was feeling at the moment.

"Kalcifer..." I cried, saying his name.

"I hope you'll say yes, though..." he said, like he had no idea how much I love him. "Will you say yes to me, baby?"

Without any second thoughts, I bit my lip and threw myself to him. I thought I'd never cry again, but I couldn't help tearing up because of joy.

Not planning to let go of him the rest of my life, I hugged him tight. "I love so much, Kalcifer..." I sincerely told him. "I love you. I will marry you. I love you."