Heartbeat

Summary: This is the limit of my mercy and extent of my power.

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"This is the limit of my mercy..."

He says through clenched teeth, watching unwavering as the man tried unsuccessfully to take cover from low height walls.

"And the extent of my power."

The wind is punctured with the sound of a released bullet. The rushing death that makes no mistake of its target.

It takes Farook by his throat, metal tearing through flesh in gory details that make Anwar flinch. Veer however remains stoic, watching with his expression arranged into unreadable lines. He watches the man falling into his knees, collapsing face first into the dust, watches the blood that run from torn veins to pool around his head in a halo of death.

Farook's eyes remain open, glazed by the terror that has reigned in his last moments. Dark, ominous blood run in tentacles around his head. A sigh leaves Veer as he turns away.

Footsteps thunder along the stairs as police officers in charge rush to the scene belatedly.

"We have the perpetrators rounded up," Anwar hears Vijendra in distance. "Rathod is done for good this time."

Anwar begins to understand it now, watching Veer's retreating back and the dead man on the ground, what exactly his friend meant by the extent of his mercy.

*

The twilight remains punishingly silent. Veer could hear each drop of Amrit's IV like an extention of her pulse.

It rhymes with his exhale, with each step he takes towards her. She is asleep. He tries to quell the fear that swells within him.

There is no blood on his hands. They are pale in the dim lights of the hospital room. Still, despite his fury telling him he had done the right thing, Veer feels contaminated by the death he had witnessed, he had, to some extent engineered.

It had been a necessary thing, just like the papers he had signed a while back, taking upon himself a role he had rejected for a long time. As Farida Begham had said, making a stand.

He was making a stand against his mother, taking over the responsibilities Farida Begham is too ill to take on at the moment. Her party, her election, her shoes - not ideally how either of them wanted things to go - but they had to play the cards they were dealt with.

Veer never wanted such power or such burden. But if that is what it takes to keep his family safe (...when he thought of his family, it extended to the Siddiquies too...) if that was what it took, he would do it gladly.

Slumping down into the chair by Amrit's bedside, he watches her sleeping face. There are tear stains, but the peace upon her face settles his fears a little.

Veer's fingers ghost along her frame, tips of his fingers daring to stroke where their child rest. He closes his eyes in prayer, not knowing the proper words to phrase what he yearned for.

So many mistakes. He wished they did not end up being sins that are vested upon his child. It's all he wants, he tries to focus on that.

"Please be safe," he mutters, overwhelmed. "Please, you have no idea how much you are loved, wanted, prayed for..."

In the pause he tries to hold himself from crumbling, Amrit's fingers seek and slip into his. Their hands clasp in a united prayer. He looks up at her, seeking. Amrit's eyes are brimming, glistening silvery in the dim lights.

Veer smoothes his other hand over her hair.

"I should have told you," he says softly. "You should have heard it from me. Lekin humein ...humein samajh nahi aaye ke kaise batayein, kya batayein, Humse rishta jodhne ke saza mil rahi hai tumhe, aur hum...hum kuch nahi kar paaye..." He presses his forehead against her knuckles, bowing as his demeanour crumbled. "Hum kuch nahi kar paaye."

Amrit says nothing for a moment, overcome by the force of his grief. Veer had never allowed himself to crumble, and now that he did, it wrenches her heart.

"She could have killed me, it wouldn't hurt so. She could have killed you...I'd go mad but still -" he swallows. "Still it wouldn't feel this way. I - I don't think I can go on - nothing makes it better, nothing helps. Nothing eases my heart. Biwi sahab yeh barbaadi nahi toh kya hai?"

Her silence feels like a penance. Veer feels his heart clenching on the pain that follows, he gasps for air, yet continues.

"My own foolishness ruined everything. I can't breathe - I can't-"

Amrit's free hand finds its way into his hair, stroking softly. Veer shudders at the benediction of her touch. His throat closes up and hot tears brim his eyes.

"How could you possibly forgive me?"

"Maaf nahi pyaar," she says softly. "Uss waqt - uss aadmi ke saamne, all I could think about was you. Saving you. Agar aap ne gunah kiya hai, toh humne bhi kiya hai jaan." Her voice breaks and dissolves into a sob. "Hum dono ne kiye aur saza kissi aur ko mil gayi...!"

Veer pulls her into a clumsy embrace and dots her hairline with kisses, murmuring soft denials.

Amrit was faultless, sinless.

Amrit was everything that is good, pure and undeserving of his darkness.

He buries his head against her shoulder as she clutched him.

"We are truly alone aren't we?" He muses then, his voice muffled.
She hummed an assent, snuggling closer.

"Ab yeh akelapan saha nahi jaata," he mutters. They clutch at each other as the world crumble around them and dreams burn.

"He is dead." Veer says after a moment.

He wills Amrit to realise that he had tried and failed to hold back. He tries to keep his fear of consequences away from his voice, he wishes fervently that he maybe punished for his wrath and sins but not his child.

"Good." Amrit sounds so unlike herself. Then her fingers tighten their hold on him.

"Don't for a moment think it makes you any worse a man. Don't for a moment call it a sin. Don't. Just don't."

There is a fire in her eyes. He inhales as he watches her, finding that his breath eases up.

"The mother in me will never forgive you had you done nothing," she says then. "And whatever you do, I absolve you of it all. Hurt them Veer. Ruin them. Make them rue this day. Please," her voice breaks then, and she clutches preciously at her belly, pressing her forehead against his shoulder. "Please. Please...aap ko humare bachche ke kasam."

The door opens softly, and daring to disturb them the oncoming party clears their throat.

Amrit is the first to pull away from the hug. Ranjit Singhania, Nayantara's husband stands at the door. Veer frowns at him for a moment and he raises his hands, drawing attention to the stethoscope in one of them.

"I come in peace," he says. "Vijendra sahab called me. Aap kaisi ho Amrit?"

His brisk manner is genuine and warm. Ranjit sets them at ease in no time. If he had heard what was being said before he gives no indication of it. Instead he talks of Amrit's reports, of improving vitals as nurses work around them.

"Now," he says clapping his hands together. "I'm going to suggest something rather unheard of. We do this in Glasgow on a clinical trial basis nowadays. An experiment run by a friend's friend let's say."

He hands the folder to Veer and looks at Amrit with sincere, well meaning eyes.

"They have this equipment that is used to examine the fetus, see if everything is as it should be," he pauses. "I wouldn't have suggested this, but since we are in an indecisive phase..."

"We can see the baby?" Amrit mutters slowly, unwilling to take her eyes off Ranjit.

"And hear their heart," Ranjit adds. "I'd be able to tell you then, if - God forbid - you have reason to worry."

"Ranjit this is -" Veer begins.

"Yes!" Amrit cuts him off. "Yes. Please." She reaches out a hand to tug at Veer's wrist. "Please." She repeats.

Veer sighs, but nods. Ranjit reads his reservations well enough. There is a lot to be addressed between them, creases that perhaps only candid speech could straighten out. He takes a moment to do that, catching Veer out of Amrit's earshot.

"She's going to be fine. They both are going to be fine."

Veer watches him for a moment.

"Ranjit you must know -"

"I know," he says heavily. "About Raghuveer, surely you know that I know? Is that why you don't trust me?" He sighs. "What do you think I did Veer? Replaced my own children with another or God forbid killed my own baby because my father in law has an agenda for a grandson?"

At Veer's silence he shakes his head.

"We lost the baby. He was three and half - our boy. It was winter in London. The roads were slippery. Tara had seen it all..." he winces on the memory. "Her brain had shut the memory out. The memory of holding her baby as he bled out in her arms. She forgot it all. Him. His death. That accident. Had I told her the truth, at that point I'd have lost her too. Surely you must know how that feels - huh?" He shifts. "So I let his majesty go on with his plans. At least it kept Tara sane. We removed everything that belonged to Raghuveer. Anything that could have triggered her. And his majesty brought the new boy. It's all water under the bridge now. And I don't resent you for digging it up. Tara deserved to know. She deserved the truth. Now - she is strong enough for it."

"You told her?" Veer asks finally, feeling a fraction of his burden easing up. Ranjit flashes him a smile.

"I'd rather my wife doesn't read my darkest secrets on a newspaper," he chuckles darkly. "She said she doesn't want to see my face for the rest of the day. She is holding on to our son's things now. Weeping, what she couldn't grieve then.

"Also, she wanted me to come here. Make sure that you don't have to go through what we did."

He lays a hand on Veer's shoulder.

"She is her father's daughter. But she is your sister too."

"What does she plan on doing now?"

"Oh, she plans on taking over that hospital once you put her on her place. She told me to tell you. She has no intention of taking Raghav from his family - or what is left of it. I don't know - maybe we could build some bridge between us. Take in that sister of his, if she is willing. I think that's what Tara means to do...I could be off my mark but ..."

Veer shakes his head, relieved at least on one account. Ranjit smiles at him awkwardly, shifting again.

"Come, let's not keep your precious people waiting..."

"Ranjit," Veer calls after him hesitantly. "You do realise that the truth could have implications on you too? Legal implications?"

Ranjit shrugs.

"Nothing I don't deserve. And to tell you the truth I don't regret being a selfish husband. I still am. My reason doesn't justify the end. So it is fine as it is. Also, you will not get a better witness to nail his majesty."

He doesn't give more time for Veer to debate on that. Veer has no more thoughts to spare on that either.

The day which might just be the darkest of their lives ends on the most beautiful notes they have ever heard.

Soft patter of the baby's heart fills the room. Ranjit points out the silhouette of their child in the screen, hardly distinguishable in the different shades of black and gray that shifts and moves. There is nothing much to be seen - really, a form barely there - but it makes a world of difference.

Amrit clasps a hand to her mouth, her other hand squeezing Veer's rather tightly. Her tears run unchecked, unhindered.

Veer allows his own vision to blur, a fervent prayer on his head, waiting between an inhale and an exhale for Ranjit to speak.

"Well..." Ranjit begins. "He or she is definitely stressed. Which is absolutely normal when your day gets disturbed with a lot of tossing and turning. They might catch a bit of your stress too, and think that mama is scared so I have to be too. That's why the heart rate has picked up. But with strict rest for a day or two, it will pass."

He smiles.

"No harm done. You have one hell of a fighter in there."

They remove the equipment quickly enough, Ranjit remarking how the long time exposure had debatable risks.

The relief he had given them, though, lingers, wrapping them in a warm cocoon of its own. Ranjit leaves them to that, saying he had matters to discuss with Vijendra - matters that Veer knew might end up taking him to the police station at the end of the day.

Veer stays back however, his fingers slipping into the gaps Amrit's leave out as she caresses where their child rested.

"Ab jaan mein todi jaan aagayi," she says, inhaling deeply as if to prove the fact. Veer wraps her in his arms making a muted resolve.

His world. His family. Shall never again be put in harm's way.

"Abhi nahi," he vows. "Abhi humara saans lena aasan nahi hua."

The pain has lessened, yes, but the memory, the implication still held him by the throat.

He will take no second chances of the sort.

He will not rest until he has seen this through.

Until he has seen their end.

**

Here ends a certain arch of the story, and the final volume so to say begins. We have only a few chapters more to go and soon, this journey of Chaar Kadam would come to an end.

*The ultrasound scanning was first used in Glasgow 1957, I have used it before its time here - as we are still somewhere early 1952. Let's call that and all scientific inaccuracies creative license. After all, I don't recommend fan fiction as a legitimate method of learning, therfore please don't come to hound me on factual inaccuracies.

See you again, hopefully soon. Thanks for still bring interested in this (sometimes boring) story of an obsolete fandom. Love you for that!