"I don't hate you. Iam just dissapointed you turned into everything you said you'd never be."

When I was younger, I basically lived at my grandma's. So did my uncle. He was more distance to me than anyone. He hated me. Not from the beginning but it started when I was around seven. He never hurted me or that stuff, but he always had to criticize what I did. And when he had nothing to say, even the way I breathed became an Issue. I guess you could say we were never more distanced than the moment it all happend. He didn't text me the way everyine else did. He didn't tell me he loves me, and that he will always be there for me. He didn't even write me for christmas. That was never a big problem, until I noticed. Until I noticed the way he looks at me. The way he talks behind my back when he thinks that I can't hear him. He hates me. I thought over hating him too, but I can't. I can't hate him like he hates me. I guess you could say that I hate the things he did to me. I hate the person I became through him. But I can't hate him. I started hating myself. Even more than I did before. It's a curse and a blessing to feel everything so deeply. I think, that as a child, you can't even hate others. You can only be dissapointed. Iam. He will get the seventh letter. A letter about the love he never gave me and the hope I had for us to get better.