✏️ Nathan

Maybe Caleb and Sarah were right. I've never truly been with anyone else before - how do I know what I'm into? Sexually and romantically?

If it wasn't for Caleb, I wouldn't be so confused.

"So, what's the plan?" Caleb clasped his hands together as he looked both ways while we stepped out of the pub doors.

I insisted on paying for lunch this time since he's been throwing his money around every which way since we've banded together. I appreciate his willingness to give but I don't want him thinking I can't handle myself. Even though I haven't shown him any different, I guess.

"How about we head to the performance areas. If she stopped for lunch like we did, she probably wants to check out some more events before heading home." I suggested.

"Ah, good idea. I think I heard some people marching over this way." He tilted his head to the left and I nodded, following his lead.

I couldn't help slinking back into my head about our conversation we had at the pub.

As I watched Caleb move through the crowd, I imagined him with her. He's always been so confident - all throughout high school. I would imagine him in bed would be the same way. Towering over whoever he's with. Holding them down by their wrists. Thrusting in and out, hard and slow.

Fuck! What is wrong with me?

There must be something in the air. I shook my head to attempt to refocus my brain.

It wasn't before long we arrived at a park with a big field filled with onlookers. There was another stage where drag performers, this time were performing a comedy show of some sort.

We stood at the peak of the hill looking down and scanned the crowd.

Pulling out my phone, I searched Sarah's account again. She had just uploaded a new story.

I tilted my phone to show Caleb who leaned over and joined me.

Sarah was at someone's house taking a picture in a mirror. She was deciding between two outfits and added a poll to ask her followers what to wear for tonight's event?

My stomach dropped. She wasn't even here anymore.

"Okay, so this was a bust." Caleb took off his sunglasses that were perched on the top of his head, and ran his hands through his hair before setting his sunglasses over his eyes.

"At least we know she's going out tonight." I muttered.

"We don't even know where she's going to be."

"Maybe she'll upload it later." I shrugged.

Caleb side glanced at me, looking confused and surprised at the same time.

"You're being rather optimistic." He smirked.

I rolled my eyes and looked back down at the crowd. "We'll find her. We're obviously hot on her trail. It's going to be any moment now."

Caleb sighed and nodded his head. "You're right."

It's my turn to be surprised now. "What did you just say?"

Caleb gave me a deep laugh in return. My stomach flipped at the sound of it. His laugh was so warm. I wanted to hear it again.

"Nope. You only get one 'you're right' from me a day. You're officially cut off." He slung his arm around my shoulders and pulled me down with him into the crowd.

———————————————————————-

The show was great. Comedy gold. One of the performers actually pulled Caleb on to the stage and made him motorboat their ginormous fake boobs. It was a masterpiece.

I couldn't help but throw my head back and laugh. Caleb clearly had a great time too. He wouldn't stop talking about it the whole way back to the hotel.

We decided to take a mini rest until later tonight. Get out of the sun, catch up on some Brooklyn 99 and just chill. I mean, it's not like Sarah is out and about anyways.

Caleb convinced me to get something other than chicken fingers and fries. I settled on a Caesar chicken wrap but he laughed and said that was basically the same thing just in a wrap form.

I don't know how at some point I forgot to hate him as much but somewhere between yesterday and today, the lines started to get blurry.

I've been side eyeing him for a moment now while we've been eating and watching tv. He sat on the ground directly over the coffee table while he bit into his burger like a hungry badger. Of course, he was topless. I watched as his dark hair drifted along the back of his neck. And how his shoulder blades tensed and relaxed every time he lifted his burger to his lips.

"What do you do for work?"  I blurted.

He stopped mid bite and looked at me confused.

"I work for my dad." He answered.

"Ah, Edward. How's that Mr.Brown doing?" I leaned back in my seat and rested my back along the couch.

Caleb removed his eyes from mine and returned to staring down at his burger. He shrugged. "Fine, I guess."

I sensed hesitation in his voice. "You're not happy? Could've fooled me with all that money you throw around like nothing." I laughed. Only, he didn't return the sentiment.

"The money I like. The expectations that come with it..." his voice trailed off. Touchy subject, I see.

"Soooo, why don't you tell him that?" I asked.

"It's not that simple. After my mom passed, I'm all he has. If I turn on him... if I disappoint him..."

I sat my plate on the coffee table, suddenly unsure of what to do with my hands. I ran my hands along my thighs to dust off any crumbs before scooting a little closer to him.

"He's your dad. Maybe he'd be disappointed in you for not following his plan but... he wouldn't stop loving you. Despite what dramatic movies and tv shows make it seem, parents don't just stop loving their kid for choosing another career." I stated.

He looked back up at me with a calming smile on his lips. "You know... it's cute that you think you know my dad." He smiled.

"Maybe I don't but I can't see him just tossing you aside. You're his son." I shrugged.

Caleb nodded his head slowly. He shifted his body to be fully squared off to me now. "How about you, huh? What do you do?" He smiled.

"I work as a graphic designer at a marketing firm. Been there for a year now." I shrugged.

Caleb's eyes widened. "What?! Dude, that's so cool! You've always been super artsy. I remember all your drawings back in school."

I narrowed my eyes. "You do?"

"Of course, man. You were good. Like, really really good." He propped his arm up on the couch. I tried to focus on something other than the fact that his arm was now sitting so close to my thigh. I could feel his body heat or was that just me?

Why does Caleb always make me feel these things?

"So, are you liking it?"

I looked down at a stray piece of yarn coming out of my shorts hem. I started playing with it as I thought about that answer. "The work I get to do is great. My co-workers are pretty cool and it pays decently well. I get to help mom and dad out a lot which is nice."

"And how's your boss?" Caleb asked. I could feel the heat started to raise up my chest and up my neck already.

"Honestly, he's kind of touchy." I laughed. Caleb immediately joined me in throwing back his head laughing. He always had the best laugh.

"What the fuck, dude? You serious?"

"Very. He's constantly finding weird ways to rub my shoulders or my back. The other day I caught him blatantly checking out my ass at the photocopier. Honestly, I don't know what I'm going to do." I shook my head.

Caleb's laughter started to die down and I couldn't help but notice a strained look crossed his face. "Is he not attractive?" He said it so faintly I thought he almost whispered it.

"What the fuck? I'm not gay..." I peeled back. Awkwardly shifting in my seat again.

"Well, how do you know?"

"What do you mean?"

"You've never truly really been with a girl other than Sarah. And you didn't have a lot of friends other than me in high school... I assume you didn't experiment at all." His eyes examined my face. I felt my heartbeat speed up all of a sudden. What was he getting at? That because I had little to no experience, I was basically still a virgin?

"Well... did you?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Did I what?" His mouth peeked up into a smirk.

"Experiment with guys. Fuck, Caleb. Do you need me to spell out everything to you?" I exhaled.

My attitude didn't even phase him. Instead, he looked intrigued. For some reason this made me so angry. Was he getting a rise out of making me feel uncomfortable.

"No, but I've done something else." His eyes glimmered. Whatever he was about to tell me, I wasn't sure if I was going to like it.

"Well, what was it?" I breathed.

"Do you trust me?" His mouth quirked up on the side in one of his dashing smiles that makes my stomach cave in.

"Oh god." I muttered.