"Ninety percent of true love is acute,
ear-burning embarrassment."

― Terry Pratchett, Wyrd Sisters

50. Adanig Nín

Singing a song about the sea and seagulls, Legolas walked slowly along the Anduin. He would follow it soon, but first he had promised Aragorn to restore this forest to its former glory. If Legolas' father allowed it, he planned to bring saplings from his home, and perhaps some people to help him plant and raise them. But then he would sail.

After his long, wearisome journey; all the battles, fears and heartache, it would be cathartic to settle here for a while. To work with plants for a few years before leaving Middle-earth. He didn't regret joining the Fellowship, but he was so done with adventuring now.

A voice drifted through the forest; one of Elrond's sons: "I must have misheard," he said. "It sounded like you said you were a cat?"

Legolas stopped abruptly, his heart suddenly racing as he heard a heavily accented, female voice reply, one he knew well though he had never heard it with his ears before.

"No, you hears right," she said. "I was a cat. And now an human. It is hard to... what is the word... expe... expa... uh."

Following the sound of the voices, Legolas began to walk. Kat must have been sent back again. But how? And why? To stay – or to say goodbye? A glimmer of hope was ignited within him and he hurried his step until he was almost running across the uneven ground.

"Are you a shapeshifter?" asked one twin.

"A what?"

"Do not be ridiculous," his brother huffed. "Humans cannot shapeshift. We should bring her to Aragorn."

"Aragorn!" she exclaimed. "Please. Yes."

"But first she needs clothes."

Legolas saw the trio now. A dark, plump woman walked between the elves, wrapped in Elrohir's much too big cloak, its hem trailing behind her. Her face was achingly familiar, yet foreign. At the same time she was his best friend and a complete stranger.

He slowed down, feeling awkward. Was she nude under that cloak? He recalled Gandalf's tale of his resurrection, and how he had reappeared naked on the mountain before the eagle brought him to Lothlórien to be healed and clothed in white. The thought of the same happening to Kat brought back an unwelcome vision from the Mirror, a glimpse that had haunted his dreams ever since.

Stepping back under the trees, he watched them pass and then followed on silent feet.

Of all people, why must it be Elrond's twins who found her in that state?

ʕll ಠ _ ಠ llʔ

Kat wouldn't stop shaking. Everything felt strange, different, wrong. The smells, the sounds. She had expected to feel at home in Middle-earth but it wasn't the same to be here in her old body.

She tried her best to hide her confusion, allowing the elvish twins to talk to her, replying as best she could. That too, was different. Before, she had been able to speak to elves unhindered via her mind, but now when her mouth had to form the unfamiliar vowels of Westron she felt like a three-year-old, only able to say the most basic things.

Then there was the problem with her lack of clothes, but thankfully the elves led her in a wide circle around the central part of the army camp, thus allowing her to stay out of sight of the soldiers. It seemed they were as anxious as she was to get her properly dressed before she would meet anyone she knew.

Kat had to stifle a nervous giggle at the thought of Legolas seeing her like this, and sent a grateful thought to Námo that he had let her be found by strangers instead.

Beyond the soldiers' colorful pavilions they came to what almost looked like a small village, made up of more plain, undyed tents. The twins said that the camp followers resided here – those who made everything run smoothly for the warriors, and provided them with cooked meals, clean clothes, healed their wounds and repaired their weapons. Even now when the war was over, the area bustled with activity. Men and women carried sacks along narrow paths between the tents, others unpacked crates and barrels from ox carts, yet others were busy preparing food in rows of roasting pits and huge cauldrons. Chickens and goats roamed freely, getting in the way and adding to the noise.

Kat was overwhelmed by it all and hardly knew where to look. The smell of mud and goat dung in combination with humans living very close and without sanitation was frankly quite disgusting, and the loud din of many voices hurt her ears.

When they passed, people paused what they were doing to gawk at the twins in awe – the women especially. Kat couldn't blame them. Elves were striking even one at a time, but identical twin elves were almost intimidating in their beauty. They looked particularly out of place here, being the only ones that were meticulously clean and well dressed.

The elves stopped at a steamy area where some women busily stirred laundry in round tubs. All of them had bare arms, red and chapped from working in water.

"Does anyone have a set of women's clothes to spare?" asked one of the twins; they had introduced themselves as Elladan and Elrohir but Kat had yet to learn who was who.

"We can pay," offered the other twin generously.

Several women raised their hands, eager to be of service, and it didn't take long until Kat was led to a tent by two matrons; Tûgwen and Taenwen. Tûgwen, the sturdier of the two, put a stack of folded garments in her arms. "Is she a Southerner then," she said, wrinkling her nose disdainfully.

Taenwen elbowed the other woman. "Be polite to the elf friend," she hissed.

"I come from long away," Kat said truthfully.

"She doesn't sound like a Haradrim. Is she from further south?" Tûgwen evaded another elbow from her friend.

"No." Kat unfolded the first garment which looked like an oversized long-sleeved t-shirt. "For sleep?" she asked.

"It's a chemise, doesn't she know? One wears it under the kirtle." Taenwen indicated a green wool dress. She seemed very surprised at Kat's lack of knowledge about clothes.

It took a while to get dressed in medieval fashion, and Kat found that though the linen chemise was a bit rough on the skin, she liked the freedom of the wide kirtle and the warmth of her sock-like hose and leather shoes.

The women asked many questions while they helped her dress, but she only understood in part, and even then it was too much an effort to think of answers. She still didn't feel well; she trembled, her breath was quick and after a while she became slightly nauseated too.

The thought of meeting everyone like this terrified her. What if they didn't like her as a human? And what would she do if she was rejected? She had nothing here; no home, no money; heck, she didn't even own the clothes on her body.

When they had finished, the matrons brought Kat back to the elvish twins, and with her heart caught in her throat she followed the pair to the main camp.

They passed many soldiers and knights, some playing dice and other games, others just talking outside their tents. The elves drew less attention here, but instead Kat felt the men's eyes linger on her, and not with kindness. Clearly they thought she was an enemy.

She shuddered, turning her gaze down. Would it always be like this? Not only was she homeless and destitute, she was also of the wrong race; one who would be met by suspicion wherever she went.

"Don't worry," said one of the elves, taking her hand and placing it on his elbow. "If you are a friend of Aragorn, he will let everyone know it."

"And as long as you are with us, nobody will hurt you," added his brother, offering her his arm too.

Walking between them like that, Kat found that she actually did feel a bit better.

Soon they came to a part of the camp where the pavilions were larger and more colorful. A lot of people were gathered in an open area in the center, many of them familiar.

Kat tried to smile at them, but her heart made somersaults and her fingers on the twins' arms felt clammy. She hoped their nice tunics wouldn't get sweat stains.

At first everyone just stared at her, but then Pippin let out a happy squeal.

"It's Kat! She's a woman again!" He scurried over to her, hugged her thighs hard and looked up at her with a broad grin. "I recognize you from the Mirror!"

"Pippin," was all she could reply. Blinking rapidly, she tried to stop her tears.

Now the others had joined him, and there was a confusion of handshakes, embraces and cheerful exclaims of 'I can't believe it's really you!', and 'Only to think this is that little cat!', and 'You got your ear back!' (this from Pippin of course).

It was almost too much. Kat was relieved to see that everyone had survived and appeared well, but at the same time she had a strange feeling that though they were her friends, they were also complete strangers. To her human senses their voices sounded different, they smelled and looked different, the angle was wrong. They should all be huge giants; not ranging from tiny to normal.

It also felt weird that she had used to cuddle with many of them. She had lied in their lap to be scratched, kneaded their thighs, toyed with Gandalf's beard. Her face heated up as she recalled all the silly cat things she had done.

But talking of cuddles... There was someone missing. She looked around, peering at the surrounding faces with growing fear. He had survived the battle! She had seen it! But then where was he?

Her gaze landed on Gimli. "Where... Uh. Where is Legolas?" she asked timidly. At least it felt good to say the name. It rolled on her tongue beautifully.

He grinned knowingly. "The lad should be back soon, I'm sure."

"Yes, he was here not long ago," agreed Frodo. "We talked about our adventures and then he went for a walk."

"I am here." Legolas emerged from behind a tent and bowed in elvish fashion. "Suilad, Miss Katharina." His eyes met hers for a millisecond before darting away.

She licked her dry lips, feeling hot and cold at the same time, managing an inelegant bow of her own. "S-suilad, Legolas."

She could think of nothing else to say. Her mind was blank.

Nellas saved the situation. Stroking Kat's hair, she said something in Sindarin.

Out of reflex, Kat looked to Legolas for a translation, but one of the twins was faster. "She says your hair is almost as nice as your fur was, and she likes its color," he supplied.

"Thank you, Nellas." Kat wanted to continue telling her how happy she was to see Nellas and Boromir, and that she had worried about them when she didn't find them in Minas Tirith before she left on her own quest, but it felt too complicated to find all those words, and she hated to speak in front of everyone and let them hear her butchering the grammar and pronunciation of their language.

If only she could send her thoughts to Legolas like before, letting him help her speak! But even if she had been able to, maybe he didn't want to do it anymore? He stood silently in the background, not looking at her.

Was he repelled because of her declaration of love before they parted? Did he worry she might be bothersome and chase after him? Now she badly regretted telling him of her feelings, especially if it had ruined their friendship. But she had thought they might never meet again; at the time it had felt like the right thing to do.

"It would seem you really did tell the truth about being a cat," said an elf twin. "Who would have thought it possible?"

"A woman in a cat's body!" agreed his brother. "Fascinating. I need to know this story!"

Kat's mind went blank again. How could she explain the Halls, her choices, her quest? But thankfully Gandalf came to her rescue. "Rebirth is tolling," he said. "Let the poor woman catch her breath and regain some energy. Come, let us have a meal together, and then we can talk more."

There were tables and crude half-log benches nearby. Elladan and Elrohir invited Kat to sit between them, and she was served a plate of food and a cup of wine. Most of it tasted strange. The wine was sour compared to modern varieties, the bread hard and dry, the meat too salty. At least the nuts, dried fruit and cheese were nice, but she had no appetite to quite enjoy them.

While she picked at her food, the others around the table took turns telling her of their adventures and asking about hers, but it became increasingly harder to understand them. The surroundings were starting to spin and her head hurt.

"You look tired," Legolas said, interrupting Elladan's recount of their ride through the Paths of the Dead.

"So she does," Elrohir agreed, peering at her with slight concern. "You have bored her with your lengthy tale, big brother."

"No, it was interesting," Kat objected. "But yes, tired..." She gave Legolas a grateful look. Apparently he could still sense her emotions to some measure.

He stood and offered her his arm. "Would you like to get away from the din?" He sounded polite and rather detached.

Then she noticed his fingers were trembling. Maybe he wasn't repelled then. He was just nervous... like her. Realizing that made her feel a tiny bit better.

"Yes, please."

Kat was not prepared for her own reaction to walking side by side with Legolas. Her entire being tuned in on him; his firm arm under her fingers, his scent – quite different in her present form, but still very pleasant – his height, his masculinity. She felt very much like a woman.

Peeking at him from the corner of her eye, she found that he was still every bit as handsome as before – even more so, if that was possible, for when seen with human eyes his colors were brighter and his features more defined. His eyes were vividly blue under dark eyebrows and his long hair shone like golden silk.

He led her to the outskirts of the camp and indicated a fallen tree by a cluster of birches. "I like to sit here. It is close enough to the others that they can see me and find me if they need to, but less loud and crowded. And there is a nice view of the river."

They sat – quite far apart, very prudently – and an awkward silence ensued. Kat cringed as she remembered her stupid daydream where they had kissed on a bench almost at first sight... The reality of their reunion couldn't be more different.

After a while, the bright spring sunshine began to make her feel a little too warm in her wool clothes. What was the time? Afternoon perhaps, or early evening.

She glanced at Legolas again. He seemed lost in thought, his gaze set on the glittering water of the Anduin. There was a deep sadness in his features that concerned her. What horrors had he seen during the war? What hardships had he endured? She longed to give him a hug, but knew he wouldn't appreciate that at all. It would only repel him.

How simple things had been when she was a cat and could comfort him with cuddles! Or talk to him mentally, for that matter. Everything she could think of to say verbally sounded stupid and wrong in her head.

"I wish I can speak," she said at last. "So much to say, but..." She threw her hands up. "Can't find words."

His head snapped up. "Have you come to say farewell? Is that why you are here?" There was a sharp edge in his voice.

Kat looked at him with surprise. "No. I are here to stay."

The sight of his face visibly relaxing warmed her heart. Had he worried that she would leave?

"I stay until death," she added solemnly.

A tiny smile suddenly hinted on his lips. "No more pizza and kaffe for you, then, but if you will teach me Despacito I shall sing it to you."

"You remembered!" Kat didn't know whether to cry in relief that he would still joke with her, or whether to laugh at it. The urge to laugh won, but tears filled her eyes at the same time.

"I have never heard you laugh." There was a slight wonder in his voice. "Nor seen you cry."

"You must get used to it." She sniffed and laughed again. "I cry much in this body..."

He smiled then, a real smile that reached his eyes and chased away some of the shadows from his features. It made him even more impossibly beautiful.

"I do not mind." Then he added: "And do not worry about talking. You are a fast learner; remember our language lessons before. I can teach you again, if you want?"

The kindness of his offer made more tears trickle down her cheeks. She sniffed and rubbed her eyes. "Thank you. Yes. I want that."

"Lesson one can be to tell me about your adventures since we parted. But not until you feel up to it."

"I do now," she said eagerly. "Not tired." It was true. She felt energetic, somehow invigorated by his presence.

She began to speak; tentatively at first but gradually with more ease. He listened patiently and whenever she was at a loss for words he helped her. With a combination of gestures and halting speech she conveyed the full story, from her encounter with the enemy army at the Crossroads to the horror of the spider's lair, on to the lonely walk with Gollum and the dramatic moments in the volcano.

"I lost the picture you did. Sorry."

He chuckled. "You have your own face now. You do not need it."

"But I liked it."

Then she told the rest of her tale: the flight to the Halls of Mandos, all the explanations she received, the brief return to her old world and her final farewells to Mamma. How hard that choice had been, but how she had realized Middle-earth was where she would be most happy.

"I am sorry you had to leave your mother," Legolas said kindly.

"She was leaving too, I think. I will meet her again... after. In... I don't know the word."

"Neither do I. Nobody knows where humans go after they die, but I am sure your mother waits for you there."

"Yes. But now I worry because I has nothing here. No house, no... what do you pay with..."

"Money. And you say 'I have'."

"I have no house and no money," she corrected.

"I understand your worries, but I am sure Aragorn will provide for you. He even allotted land to Sméagol, so how can you doubt he would do the same for you?"

"You are right, maybe." Then she remembered. "Oh. Lord Námo said Sméagol will get... little... little..." She made a rocking motion with her arms.

"Baby?" Legolas stared at her.

"Yes!" She chuckled at his flabbergasted face.

He shook his head. "Unbelievable..."

"I know!"

They both burst out laughing, and it felt so good to be laughing together. By now the awkwardness and shyness had finally subsided, and it almost felt like before they parted between them – but also different, as if they were beginning a new chapter in a story. Though Kat didn't know how it would end, she felt certain their friendship would persist. Legolas was still her best friend. He was the clay her long straw needed.

Legolas took over and shared some of his own adventures. He tried to make his tale light-hearted, but underneath there was a tone of loneliness, and often it was evident he regretted what he had had to do. Again Kat longed to hug and comfort him, but in this form she would have to resort to just listening with sympathy.

When he came to the part where Aragorn's ghost army rescued the ships at Pelargir and how the seagulls had given him sea-longing, Kat's sympathy turned into worry. She wanted him to be happy, not to long for another life far away. She didn't want him to go.

"But I need a teacher." She tried to smile as if she was joking, but it probably looked more like a grimace.

"I will stay for a while: a month, a life, a hundred years of men." He sighed wistfully.

"Can it be a hundred years, please?" She could not hide the anxiety in her voice.

He was silent for a moment before answering. "Aye. I can stay for a hundred years." A warm smile broke out on his face and he looked at her directly for the first time. "It feels good to talk. I missed it. I missed you."

Kat's heart beat faster. Suddenly shy again, she murmured a bit breathlessly: "Even though I bited your arrows?"

"Even though you bit my arrows, aye, and made holes in my hose with your claws." Then he turned serious. "It was empty without you. Lonely. Especially at night."

"You missed your little cat." Kat frowned. "I can't be a cat again."

He shook his head. "Nay, I missed adanig nín." My little human.

A/N:

We deserve some fluff after all the previous pining, don't we? :)

Thank you so much, dear readers for your support. 😍 You are all so sweet with your kind comments and votes, it's really encouraging. It helps me keep writing.