Trystan's Point of View

I got home and the first thing I saw was a busy family in the living room. I don't care anyway. I wanted to just passed but I'm still their son. And I had a very great day.

"Good evening mom, dad and mamu."

I greeted them as I walked near to them.

"Oh, son. You're here na pala."

Mom said while smiling and give me a kiss on the cheek, I do the same. Sounds gay, but I'm proud to say that I'm a momma's boy. She's the only girl who knows everything about me. She's not just a mom to me but also a buddy.

"Tamang-tama anak. May sasabihin kami sayo."

Dad boredly said. What's new.

"Oo apo. We've decided na this coming sunday ay uuwi na tayo sa Pinas para mameet mo na yung fiancée mo."

"What?! Ang aga naman ata?!"

"Yun nga! Para makahabol ka sa klase. Doon ka na namin ipapasok ng school."

"Tsk! But mamu! I thought it was just a meeting, why do I have to transfer?! I'm okay with here! I'm fine with this nation! I don't want to mamu, n---"

"Son! Shut up! Yun na ang napagdesisyunan namin! Whether you like it or not, the decision is final, doon ka na mag-aaral at kailangan mo na ring i-meet ang fiancée mo, sa lalong madaling panahon!"

This can't be! Fvck!

"But dad!---"

"Uh-uh! No BUTS son, like I said, it's final!"

"Mommy?"

"I'm sorry son. You know your dad naman di ba?"

"No! I only want here! At mas lalong ayokong makipag kita to whoever that fiancée is!"

"Son! Ba't ba ang tigas ng ulo mo ha!?"

He's now on his irritated look. I can see that. The way he closes the newspaper he was reading.

"Ikaw ang matigas ang ulo dad! Ayaw ko nga! AYAW! Isn't that easy to understand dad, is it?"

And now he's pissed. Totally pissed. He is looking at me—my eyes furiously and at the same time in disbelief.

"Bakit ba ayaw mong sumunod sa akin ha?! Ang tigas ng ulo mo! Di kita pinalaki ng ganyan!"

"You asked me?! Oh, you asked me."

I know, I sounded sarcastic but, I'm also pissed and hurt at the same time.

"Simple dad!"

I tried to control my emotion. I'm angry like hell! Heck! I step forward to face my dad with the same intensity he gave me.

"DAHIL NASASAKAL NA AKO SA INYO! ALL YOU DID WAS TO TREAT ME LIKE A PUPPET! AND I'M FVCKING TIRED! I WANTED FREEDOM! BUT YOU DID NOT LET ME! AND NOW, THIS?!"

I never wanted to be in this situation before. And I also don't want to do this to my family but, they give me no choice.

"Son, stop it."

I ignored mom who tried to stop me by pulling me to her side. Mamu just watching us, dismay.

"THIS IS MY LIFE DAD! BASICALLY, I CAN AND I WILL DECIDE FOR MYSELF! You don't own me dad. I have my own life. Palibhasa kasi sarili nyo lang iniisip nyo, you don't think of what I feel."

"Anong sinabi mo?! Ulitin mo nga?!"

"YOUR SO DAMN SELFISH!"

And yes, he punched me, as expected. Funny, he can punch his own son. What a great father.

"Greg! Stop it! Wag mong saktan ang anak mo!"

Mom immediately grabbed dad's arms and looked at me, concern. I wiped the blood beside my lips. Damn that bastard.

"Anak. Are you okay?? Anak, wag mo nang suwayin ang daddy mo."

Mom said full of concern and helped me to stand up. I look at my dad who is now furiously looking at me. The words he said were like daggers in my heart.

"You are such an ungrateful son! Kahit kailan talaga, di ka katulad nya!"

"Dad! Sya na naman? Hanggang ngayon pa rin ba?" I scoff. "Sabagay, ano nga ba namang panama ko sa kanya, favourite mo nga di ba? And to tell you dad, I'm different from him. So don't try too damn much to make me him! Dahil wala syang kwenta!"

"Clifford! Greg! Stop this!"

But dad didn't listen to mamu. He even pointed his finger on me.

"Wag na wag mo syang matawag-tawag na walang kwenta! Dahil ikaw! Ikaw ang walang kwenta! Kung hindi dahil sa'yo, edi sana nandito pa sya ngayon!"

"Hun. Tama na."

"How many times do I have to tell you that, IT WASN'T MY DAMN FAULT! I didn't ordered him to go there! In fact, he disobeyed and he's stupid! Really!"

"Walang hiya ka talagang bata ka! Isa kang suwail na anak!"

He was going to throw punches to me but mom grabbed his arms. I'm ready for that mom. Need not to worry. And i'll make sure that, it was the last punch I could get from him. I'll runaway.

"Tama na hun! Totoo naman ee, walang kasalanan si Clifford sa nangyari. Aksidente lang ang lahat ng yun."

"Tsk! Ganyan naman kayo palagi ee. Lagi nyong isisi sa akin lahat!"

I left them and went to the mini bar in our house.

Kahit kailan talaga, palagi nalang ako!

Sa totoo lang naiingit nga ako sa kanya dati ee...

"Son, come here."

Dad called Christian, my twin. They were both smiling from ear to ear as they hug each other.

"My surprise ako sayo."

"What is it daddy?"

"Ito! Tanan!!"

"Wow daddy! Ang ganda naman nitong bike! Salamat daddy!"

"Anything for you my child."

I saw how happy they are while me standing in front of them and dad didn't noticed me, again. He even teaches Christian how to ride while me, sitting in the corner with a robot in my hand. This is the only toy I have.

Lahat ng gusto ng kambal ko, binibigay lahat ni Daddy.

Piling ko nga di nila ako tunay na anak, kung di lang siguro kami magkamukha, malamang di nga nila ako tunay na anak.

Pero, totoo namang di ko talaga kasalanan ang nangyari sa kanya noon.

"Christian! Wag ka na nga kasing sumama sa akin!"

"Sige na Trystan.. Sama na ako."

Hayy! Napahilamos ako ng mukha, ang kulit talaga ng kambal ko.

"Wag na nga sabi ee! Di ka marunong lumangoy! Baka malunod ka!"

"Trystan naman! Sama na nga kasi ako! Di naman ako pupunta sa malalim ee. Sige na Trystan! Pagbigyan mo na ako! Gusto ko talaga maligo sa dagat, lagi kasi akong papagalitan ni Daddy kapag pupunta ako dun. Sige na Trystan pumayag ka na, habang wala pa si Daddy."

"Yun na nga. Di pwede dahil magagalit sayo si Daddy! Wag na nga kasing makulit!"

"Ee, Trystan naman! Sama na kasi akoooo!!!"

"Haayy naku! Ayoko na ngang maligo! Kulit mo naman kasi ee."

"Trystan naman!"

"Tss. Dito ka lang ha? Wag kang pupunta sa dagat. Kukuha lang ako ng pagkain."

Iniwan ko sya sa cottage at pumasok sa loob ng bahay namin.

We were here at our beach house, for a vacation. But it turns out I can't enjoy the place. It's all because of my twin.

Kaya nga ayoko talagang makasama yang kambal ko pag nandito kami e, ang kulit! Gusto talagang maligo sa dagat di naman marunong lumangoy.

Pagkatapos kong kumuha ng mga pagkain, lumabas na ako ng bahay at nakasalubong ko naman sina mommy't daddy.

"Oh anak, nasaan ang kambal mo?"

"Ah, nandun po sa may cottage dad, iniwan ko po dun para kumuha ng pagkain. Nagpumilit po kasi sya kaninang sumama sa akin sa dagat para maligo pero di ko na po tinuloy at kumuha nalang ako ng pagkain."

"Ano? Pero wala sya dun sa cottage."

I looked at my dad, confused.

"Po? Bakit naman po? E, andun lang sya kaninang iniwan ko."

"G-greg. H-honey. A-anak. S-si Christian."

Napatingin kaming dalawa ni daddy kay mommy na nakatingin sa dagat.

"Christian!!!!"

Nabitawan ko ang platong hawak-hawak ko at di ako makagalaw sa kinatatayuan ko.

"Anak!! Gumising ka!"

I'm still stunned and can't even move my feet. Dad tried to revived my twin but nothing happened. My mom is crying and people hurriedly run towards our direction. I felt like I am shaking but still can't move or even utter a word.

"Kasalanan mo 'to! Kung hindi dahil sayo, hindi sana nangyari 'to!"

And tears started rolling down my face. My heart was ripped. Was I at fault?

Bakit daddy?? Hanggang ngayon, ako pa rin ang sinisi mo sa nangyari sa kambal ko, why dad? Why?

Kasalanan ko ba kung bakit matigas ang ulo nya??

Kasalanan ko ba kung bakit sya pumunta sa dagat??

At kasalanan ko ba kung bakit sya namatay??

10 yrs ago since that incident happened but it feels like yesterday. It will be always fresh to me.

Dahil siguro ako pa rin ang sinisi ni daddy sa nangyari sa kambal ko.

But damn it! I never wanted that!

Kinabukasan, my head is aching badly. Ugh! I open my eyes and saw ten empty bottles of tequila. I didn't make it to my room. And they didn't bother to find me. I'm used to it.

Kahit masakit ang ulo ko dahil sa hang-over kagabi, pumasok pa rin ako. Gusto kong mag-aliw!

"Good morning Prince!"

They greeted me as if there is really good in the morning. Tss, what's the good in the morning?

"Good morning too ladies."

Okay, there is really good, which is me, but mine alone will never be good.

"Kyyyyyyaaahhh!!! Why you so, handsome???"

"Waaaa,, killer smile!"

I shook my head and hide the bitterness with a smile in my face.

"Oh my God! I can-t b-breath!"

I smiled again. I love how they can lift up my mood immediately. I love girls, they're fun to be with. That's why I just want to be here. I don't know what Philippines looked like since I left there 13 yrs ago.

"Hey, are you okay? May I help you, miss?"

I just want to ride their craziness. To ease the pain.

"Waaaaa!!!! Why are you so sweet?? You're so kind! You know what? You're like an angel sent from above!"

"Thanks for the compliment babe. Wanna have some fun?"

I smiled seductively! I laugh at the back of my mind. What? I just want to have fun.

"Ow, Prince. Too early for that fun ah?"

"Why baby, wanna join?"

"Oh sure. Count me in."

"Okay, so, explain yourself to the clinic now ladies."

I left them and went straight to the clinic. I want to sleep. I'm tired. But I'm still game for the fun.

"Hey, miss nurse? Can I sleep inside?"

I winked at her and her face turned red. She tried to smile at me but can't look straight in to my eyes.

"S-sure! Need my company?"

"Haha, if you want."

This is what I love the most in them. They're so great when it comes to this thing. I am so much satisfied with six girls in my entire day. Six girls in just a day, not bad. I'm planning for tonight but I guess I needed enough sleep. My head is still numb. I didn't get enough sleep but its okay, I had fun.

***
I saw mamu in the living room, waiting for me, probably.

"Apo---"

"Leave me alone."

I thought I was the one making her leave but it turns out that I was the one who turns my back on her. I don't care. I'm not in the mood to face them right now.

I was in the second floor lobby on my way to my room when I met dad. He looked at me like he has something to say and was about to open his mouth, I cut him.

"Don't talk to me."

I firmly said and left him in the middle. Before I close the door I heard him let a loud sigh. I plunged into my waterbed and sleep.