My bare feet slapped the pavement. The asphalt burned my toes like I was walking on hot coals.

Spot, I had to find Spot, nothing else mattered. The only person who I could talk too, to trust, and I had forgotten about him for a moment of peaceful serenity.

Thankfully he was still on the dock when I got there. Regret and guilt filled my heart.

"Spot!" I yelled running up him. He turned around, barley acknowledging my presence.

"So you came then?" He mumbles.

I bit my lip, "sorry I was out late. I had to finish selling my papers." I knew that was a dumb lie. Spot knew it too. After the strike Newsies got refunded for any papers they didn't sell.  Now if they took too many Weisel paired them afta.

I sat down next to him. "Youse with Jack wasnt youse?"

I sighed, "I can't keep anything from you can't I?"

He nodded and sighed. "I'm scared youse getting in too deep Jan." I smiled "Its genetic, getting in over our heads that is."

He nodded, "Listen Jan I gots to tell you somthin."

He wasn't mad, thank goodness. I knew if he had been real angry I may never had made it back to Manhattan.

"Shoot," I smiled.
"I ran away, a few days before they'd died. I was young and dumb and motional. Listen if I had been there...I thought you was dead Jan. I thought you died and I'm sorry but I can't have you round. I can't look at you and lie, to meself and to my Newsies."

My face darkened, I couldnt believe him! "Youse saying you don't care bout me? That I'm a burden?!"

Spot sighed, "I ain't saying that Jan!"

My cheeks turned red, and here I was thinking he'd look out for me forever. Thinking I finally had someone to count on. "Jan," he sighed.

"No" I said bitterly. "I've been on my own a long while Spot Colon. I knows when I'm not wanted! And to think I came all the way down here thinking youse wanted to see me!"

He might have called after me but I wasn't listening. Tears stung my eyes and I knew I'd never go back to Brooklyn again.